Our Beginning
by Eliza Kitty
Summary: CHAPTER 27 UP! ...The world has begun anew, but there are still lost souls that have yet to be reunited... Is this the paradise they searched for? ...Nothing is ever what it seems... Romance, Action, Suspense, Drama, etc. Tsume/Toboe 3
1. Chapter 1

Hello! I have been a fan of Wolf's Rain from the get-go, but recently went through and watched the series again. I fell in love all over again and decided to work on my long-time dream of continuing the story in a fan-fiction short story. The first chapter took one evening, and I'm planning to post more soon. I'm very excited to share my take on the Wolf's Rain characters' futures. This was an amazing series that touched my heart in so many ways; so here is my tribute to the creators, series, characters and fellow fans. :)

**FYI:** If you prefer the "uncut" version, please check out adult fanfiction dot net or deviant art.

Caution: Further chapters will contain mature content such as language and yaoi, Tsume/Toboe. Be forewarned.

Disclaimer: I do not own the characters or series of Wolf's Rain. They belong to BONES & Keiko Nobumoto. This story is non-profit for my own and others' enjoyment. Thank you. :)

**A New Beginning**

The youth was awakened by the glare of sunlight that beamed through the dark curtains and onto his pale face and messy auburn hair. The cold morning air bit his nose and he groaned, pulling the thick, white comforter over his head. Lost in thought under the warm blankets, he frowned as he recalled the dream he had once again visited during his sleep. It had been like this for quite some time and he did not understand why. The flash of wild, running wolves dashed through his mind and he threw the covers back, frustrated and confused.

He managed to drag himself out onto the cold, hardwood floor. Another chill flew through the room and he shivered, clutching himself. As he looked up he noticed the window was open and quickly ran to close it. He paused there at the window for a moment after, once again lost in his thoughts. "Gran…" he sighed. The look on his face was one of frustration and sorrow. He was beginning to see her slip away from him and he knew it was only a matter of time, time that she did not have. He shook the dark thought away and made his way into the hallway and to the bathroom.

He looked into the mirror after washing his face, holding the green towel close and gazing into his own curious, amber eyes. The wolves came back to him; his dream. He leaned over the sink and closed his eyes. He was in the dream once again, running with the wolves. He remembered feeling a sense of longing, searching, finding and holding onto something that was out of reach. But what was it?

"Toboe! Good morning!" The young boy snapped back to reality as an older, greying voice greeted him with a wrinkled smile. "Morning, Gran." He smiled back at her. "What time is it? How long have you been up?"

Her happy smile turned into a curious one and she looked up to the ceiling, "Well," she paused, "I'm not quite sure, but breakfast is ready." She turned and Toboe followed, dropping the towel onto the floor behind him.

"So I have to work again this morning and," He stopped when caught the delicious aroma of food in front of him and shoveled a fork full of hot scrambled eggs into his mouth, "Mmmm, this is great, Gran!" He continued his meal, occasionally biting into the crunchy, buttered toast between the eggs, guzzling orange juice to wash it all down. He hardly took any breaths, ravenous as if he had not eaten in days.

"My Goodness, my dear Toboe. Did you eat anything for supper last night?" Gran spoke up, concerned with his manner.

Toboe stopped eating and looked up, a smudge of butter on his chin and a crumble of egg in the corner of his mouth. "Yes," he slowly replied, "I had a sandwich on the way home from work last night…" He looked down at his plate, three quarters gone.

"Oh. Well… you're behaving like a wild animal." she frowned. She slipped a bite in herself and calmly chewed while Toboe sat there, still staring into his plate. After she took a sip of orange juice she spoke again, "Do you work today?" She continued her breakfast as she waited for a reply. After two more bites of eggs and another sip of juice she was concerned, "Toboe?"

Toboe stared into his plate, the milky, white glass beneath the remnants of what was left from his breakfast. His reflection was unclear, the plate old and scratched, creating a jaded image of himself.

"Toboe?"

He shot up, "I'm sorry! …What?" He blushed, embarrassed for many reasons.

"What's wrong?" Gran asked. "You seem so distant today." She reached out her weathered hand and gently placed it over his that was currently clutching onto a worn fork. "Did something," She coughed half way through the sentence and removed her hand from his, clasping it over her mouth. Bending over, the chair she sat in creaked and she clutched her knee with her other hand. She started coughing again, more aggressively.

"Gran!" Toboe shouted and rushed to her side, knocking over his own chair. He knelt next to her, his arms around her. The coughing slowed and eventually came to a halt. "Water…" she breathed in a raspy voice. Toboe nodded and rushed to the sink, quickly flooding water into an empty glass from the counter top. He rushed back to her and she took the glass in her shaky hands, slowly swallowing it down.

After a moment it felt as if nothing had ever happened and she returned to normal. "Toboe," she smiled down at him, as he was still by her side. His expression was worried and frantic. "Toboe," she said again and touched his smooth face with her wrinkled palm. She brushed back a few strands of his hair with her bony fingers as she spoke, "You're so good to me."

He smiled softly, relaxing himself at her touch. They had been together as long as he could remember. Gran continued to stroke his hair as Toboe laid his head on his grandmother's soft lap, closing his eyes. He vaguely remembered the woman, his mother, the one that held him in her arms long ago, her long hair caressed by the wind as he grabbed at it; it was the color of his own. And her eyes; her eyes were bright blue, like the sky on a beautiful day.

He thought of Gran and her smiling face, her kind embrace. He slowly opened his eyes, keeping them half shut as his mind drifted with Gran's loving touch. He couldn't remember the day his mother left, why she had left, where she had gone to. "Gran?" he asked softly.

"Yes, my dear?" she continued to pet him.

"How long has it been now? How long have we been like this… since mom went away?" he asked.

"Oh Toboe. …Many years now, I do suppose. Why do you ask?"

"I miss her. I wish we were all here together, like before… Why… why did she leave us?"

Gran did not answer for a moment as Toboe laid his head patiently on her lap. As she stroked past his cheek again, she felt warm tears on her fingertips. "My little one, you were so young. Your mother," she paused. "It was a few years after the new beginning… She had to go." She waited for him to speak up, but he said nothing, sitting there quietly. She continued, "It will be all right my dear. One day… we will all be together again in Paradise."

Toboe immediately sat up, slightly startling his grandmother. "What did you say?"

"Ah," she looked at him curiously but then relaxed again. She looked to the window across the room, sounds of the city blaring outside the glass panes. She sighed and continued her stare, as if she were imagining something. "I am aware that I am not long for this world. Soon I will join my daughter, your mother, and we will both be waiting until it is your time." She looked at him but he did not meet her gaze.

Toboe stared into his lap as Gran spoke, "Toboe, I know that it upsets you for me to say things like this. But I am too old now to pitter patter around the truth." She looked down at her own hands, worn and tired from the years. "I am an old woman. I have seen many years and many things in my time. I do not regret the days I have spent with you." She met his gaze and smiled as he would now face her, all though he still appeared frightened. "I have watched you grow up into a fine young man." She looked down again, "But when I am gone, I wish for you to keep on living. For you also have many years and things to see."

"Toboe, my dear, my little one… You don't even know how special you are." Gran looked at him again and reached out her arms to him. Toboe bit his lip and dove into her embrace. She held his body close to her as he tried to choke back the bittersweet sobs. "Oh, Toboe… My little miracle. This world used to be such a dark and dreary place. I watched this world turn from a murderous, disease-ridden wasteland into a perfect and bountiful paradise."

Toboe opened his eyes, not sure what it was about that word, but still held onto her. His tears had ceased and he simply listened to Gran's story.

"Everything changed with you, my dear. Not just the lives of your mother and I, but this world. When you were born, the world found paradise, a new beginning."

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><p>Thank you for reading! I'm sure there are probably not many Wolf's Rains fans left. But I hope that those of you who are fully enjoyed my first installment. I would appreciate it if you took the time to review. Thanks again, and look for more to come! :)<p> 


	2. Chapter 2

Hello again! This chapter is a little shorter than the first, which was way longer in comparison. Enjoy, we are just getting started! :)

**FYI:** If you prefer the "uncut" version, please check out adult fanfiction dot net or deviant art.

Caution: Further chapters will contain mature content such as language and yaoi, Tsume/Toboe. Be forewarned.

Disclaimer: I do not own the characters or series of Wolf's Rain. They belong to BONES and Keiko Nobumoto. This story is non-profit for my own and others' enjoyment. Thank you. :)

**Take Me Home**

The tapping sound of rain repeatedly hit the pavement, the smell of dirt washing away with each drop. The storm was loud and clear as the sounds of the city attempted to voice their demands above it, the sounds of car horns, alarmed, before the vehicles screeched to a halt. Pedestrians made their usual paths, each coping in their own way with the storm that had interrupted a perfectly good day. There were some with dripping umbrellas, but many without, quickly scurrying to their destinations.

A red light glared above the young man, reflecting light into his helmet as he waited atop the red motorcycle, waiting for the green go-ahead. The wet rain had fully soaked into his clothes and skin, but he didn't care. He sighed to himself, anxious to return to his empty apartment and sleep the rest of the day off. He had been working all night and was content to become dead to the world for the next several hours. It was something that he longed for each and every day when it began.

The routine of his daily life seemed meaningless, each day beginning and ending in the same manner it had the previous day before. He scratched the back of his head right underneath his helmet. He thought to himself as his fingertips grazed past the silver hair strands, _"I need a haircut."_

Why was he even here? What was the point? His entire life had been a journey from town to town for as long as he could remember. Even as a child, he moved from home to home, never fully settling down into one place. "_I was born alone_," he would think to himself from time to time,_ "I'm alone now and I'll die alone too."_ As a young child, this man had convinced himself that it was better this way, that he was perfectly fine with being alone. But the fact was that he was lonely, even now as an adult. But this was a fact that he would never admit, even to himself.

As these very thoughts repeated once again through his head, the light turned green and he refocused on his current objective. He jutted off with a burst of noise and drove the bike like there was no tomorrow, zipping through the slick streets, in and out of traffic as many cars honked at his abrupt manner. His behavior was dangerous, but he didn't care, even when he felt the front tire underneath him slip a little while turning a sharp corner.

He caught his own breath as he almost lost control of the vehicle, the tire skidding through a deep puddle. Slightly letting go of the accelerator, his loosened grip relaxed the bike, as well as himself. Even though he knew it was reckless, he soon regained his speed, quickly passing cars and buildings, a flurried flash of colors and light. He just wanted to sleep, forgot the world for one more day.

It was then that he was dreaming of his bed, unmade and not very comfortable, that he happened to glance over to a busy sidewalk of civilians. All though it was a split second as he zoomed past, one person in particular caught his eye. His thoughts, his mind, even his heart stopped when he quickly met the gaze of a younger boy. It was only a moment's notice, but he spotted him there, in a heavy coat, pink hat and umbrella with auburn hair.

He couldn't breathe.

He didn't know who it was. He didn't know why it had happened. It just did.

Almost immediately, he glanced back at the boy whose eyes he had just met. The younger one still held him in his sight; it appeared that he was also taken by the short moment they had shared together. There was a sense of longing, a tugging, pulling feeling inside of him and he couldn't understand why. He frowned, turning back to the road ahead just as a screeching car tire woke him up. He speedily swerved to the right, barely missing the back of the truck.

Sighing relief, he continued on his path, for once thankful that he was alive. "That was stupid," he spoke out loud. The image of the younger boy rushed back into his mind, confusing him once more. He kept the thought for a short moment, but quickly shook his head. He returned to his previous thought pattern and complained to the motorcycle beneath him, "Girl, just take me home so I can sleep."

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><p>Thank you for reading! So I know I did not mention Tsume's name in this chapter, but it was fairly obvious that it was him if you watched the last episode, correct? That's just not the way I write… But that's a whole 'nother story. :) Please review if you enjoyed this installment and hold out for the next one, soon to come! Thanks again!<p> 


	3. Chapter 3

Hello all! Here is the third installment to the story. I don't have much to say but I hope you all enjoy it!

**FYI:** If you prefer the "uncut" version, please check out adult fanfiction dot net or deviant art.

Caution: Further chapters will contain mature content such as language and yaoi, Tsume/Toboe. Be forewarned.

Disclaimer: I do not own the characters or series of Wolf's Rain. They belong to BONES & Keiko Nobumoto. This story is non-profit for my own and others' enjoyment. Thank you. :)

**Rain Falling Down**

"_Paradise,"_ He kept repeating the word in his head; he could not let go of it. _"Paradise. …Why paradise?" _

There was something unknown to him, something unsettling about those words. He had so many thoughts cluttered in his mind, his dreams, his Gran, his mother and now this word, paradise. It was a word Gran had used to describe heaven, but why did it strike something so deeply in his mind?

His thoughts were interrupted by sudden raindrops that began to pelt his coat and hat. It actually made him smile, because he had finally remembered to bring an umbrella this time. _"I knew it."_ He thought to himself. As he extended the yellow umbrella over his head, his thoughts retraced back to Gran and her condition this morning. It was too much for him to accept. It was something he did not want to think about, but he couldn't help it.

He shook his head and continued down the sidewalk next to others, each in their own thoughts and paths. He wondered if he would get in trouble for being late to work; but it had been a difficult morning. Mr. Jon would probably give him a hard time, but would soon let it go. He was a kind, older man but expected everything to be a certain way. But it had only been an hour ago that he was scheduled to work. Today was trading and buying day so he was looking forward to that. How long had it been since he started working at Mr. Jon's bookstore? Two or three years maybe? He didn't know.

The rain continued to wash down on the busy city, clearing out any debris in the streets into the gutters. Cars drove by and a few sometimes honked at the resisting traffic, puddles splashing onto the sidewalks as they sped by. There were many without umbrellas who improvised with their coats or newspapers as they made their way. Others just ran to escape the drenching droplets. The buildings towered over their inhabitants as they each partook in their own separate businesses, just living out day to day.

The sound of a motorcycle speeding by amidst all the busy chaos caught his attention and he looked up from his thoughts. He immediately found himself lost in a trance, caught in a spell by the man on the bike. He too glanced his way and their eyes met, everything around them slowing down to the very millisecond. This moment that only lasted a mere second but seemed much longer. As the man with the red helmet and dark clothes zoomed past him, the younger boy followed him with his eyes. Even a moment as he and his bike disappeared in the distance, the man turned his head back to him once more. He couldn't breathe.

The young boy kept his eyes on him, even after he had gone out of sight, lost into the traffic and miles ahead of him. "Who? …Who was that? Did I know him?" he spoke to himself, out loud. He felt lost, every other thought that he'd had that day lost. It seemed that nothing else mattered, nothing else could fill his mind except for this thought, a mere moment, a simply by chance occurrence.

His mind was racing and he thought he was going to go into some sort of a panic. But he didn't feel like that at all. He didn't feel anxious, fearful or even worried.

He just felt lost.

"Meooow…" The small sound woke him up and he looked down to where it had come from. In between the two buildings he stood by, in a small brown and worn box was a kitten. His heart skipped a beat and he quickly knelt over. The little kitten was all by itself, cowering in one corner of the box. The boy smiled and picked up the cream colored ball of fluff. It nuzzled him under his chin and he giggled a little, holding it closer to him. He looked around for an owner maybe, but there was no one; everyone was content with going their own way in the crowd.

"Hmmm," he spoke gently to it, "we'll figure something out."

Moments later, he sighed as he finally walked up to the old bookstore in the corner, gold font on the windows, a few tattered books on display. He looked down at the kitten in his arms and bit his lip. Just then an older girl with dark, short hair barged out of the store, the bell rattling on the door.

"Fine!" she yelled, "I'll just find somewhere else!" The young boy stopped when she accidentally bumped into him. "Ah, I'm sorry!" She grimaced. He noticed her bright blue eyes and was amazed at how striking they were. "What?" she asked. When he didn't say anything, she shrugged, dipped one hand into a pocket of her coat and walked away in the rain with a box in the other arm.

He wondered what had happened and entered the little shop, the bell chiming. He quickly grew comfortable as it was much warmer inside; it was an unusually cold and rainy day for it being late spring. The inside of the store was filled with wall to wall bookshelves, stuffed with various readings, old and new. An old man looked up from the counter at the young boy, frowned and went back to his work, stacking books to his left and going through the ones on the right.

"I'm sorry I'm-"

"You're late?" The old man interrupted him, "Well yes, I'm sorry too." He didn't look up from his work.

The young boy looked down, embarrassed, and walked to the back room, the kitten covered under his coat. This room too, was filled with many bookshelves fully stocked, but also a small table and couple of chairs among other things. There was one box on the floor that wasn't completely packed with books, so he emptied out the few that were there and placed the little kitten in it. It meowed at him and the boy held his finger up to his lips, "Shhhh."

"Toboe!" his boss yelled.

"Coming!" he patted the kitten on the head, threw his coat and hat on the cluttered table, umbrella against the side of the door and ran out to answer the call. He hurriedly walked up to the old man with a smile on his face, "Yes Mr. Jon?" he asked, nervously straightening the books in front of him. "Don't touch those! And why have you got a smile on your face?" He grabbed the few books and front of Toboe and moved them a few inches over on the counter. Toboe followed the gesture and frowned. "I am sorry." He looked down, waiting for a reply but there was none. He continued, "My grandmother had some trouble this morning."

Mr. Jon's face softened, "Oh, is that so? How is she now? It's been a while since I've seen her."

Toboe didn't smile, but he felt better on the inside because the man's tone had become relaxed and sympathetic toward him. He still did not meet his eyes however, "She's doing all right." He said slowly and then went to change the subject, "What did that girl want?" he asked.

That sent Mr. Jon off on a hissy tantrum, as Gran would've put it. "Well! Let me tell you! She brought in a box full of moldy, old books." Toboe almost regretted the question when the bookseller became immediately angry again. "I can't sell those! Just because I sell and buy old books doesn't mean I'll take anything. These young people, no offense," He glanced at the young boy who nodded as an excuse, "they think an old coot like me won't see it coming, like they'll pull one over on me." He started to calm down and began sorting his books once more. "They don't understand. I tried to explain it to her, but she was just so rude." He spoke in a hushed voice now.

Toboe continued to listen, feeling sorry for him, but also slightly afraid to say anything. "Well, I don't know. Maybe she badly needed some money." He sighed, "But the thing is, we all do. Everyone is struggling right now it seems." He didn't say anything more, just continued working on his project.

Toboe waited a moment or two and finally decided to speak up, "Well I know something that will cheer you up!" He took a chance, wondering if he should've crossed his fingers or not and ran to the back room. Mr. Jon looked after him curiously and almost excited, that is, until the boy brought out a kitten instead of sugar cookies. "What is that?" his voice held no tone of any kind.

"It's a kitten!" Toboe smiled, holding the little thing up for him to see. "I found it on the way to work. Someone abandoned her, can you believe that? And it's pouring out there!" Each sentence came out nervously as he was afraid of the reaction. He sat the cream puff on the counter top who began to explore everything within reach. She jumped on top of the book stack and off again, knocking a few of them onto the ground with a big thud. She looked startled at first, but continued to check everything out.

Mr. Jon stared vacantly at the little thing, "And I'm supposed to keep it since your grandmother is allergic, is that it?" he asked and looked at the boy who shyly scratched the back of his head. "Oh, so you remembered that?" he replied sheepishly.

The old man laughed a little, which made Toboe relax completely. "Well of course, isn't that how it turned out with the last one?" He hinted to the back corner of the room, where on top of the tallest bookshelf napped an old, black cat. "What if Max doesn't like her?"

Toboe thought for a second, "Well, what if he does? She's little. And besides, if he doesn't, I'll figure out something." He paused, "Maybe I could keep her in a box on the back porch."

"For heaven's sake, no!" He snapped. "She'll be fine here." The boy then knew that that was all it took and smiled.

Mr. Jon picked up the kitten and began to pet her as she meowed in reply. As the old man was enjoying his new little friend, Toboe decided to get to work sorting the new arrivals, organizing the usual ones and replacing the bought ones. He went over to the display window, noticing some dust on the tops of the books sitting there. "Mr. Jon?" There was no reply aside from a chuckle. He looked back at the display of purring affection and love. Toboe rolled his eyes. His boss pretended to be tough but he wasn't really, not at all. "Mr. Jon!"

"Y-yes, what's that?" He looked up.

"Do we need to put out new books for the display? These ones have been here a while." He asked and began to pull the books out of the window, knowing the reply would be yes, but he still had to ask; he also knew Mr. Jon.

"Yes, that'll be good." He sat his little friend down on the ground and picked up a box on the floor left of the counter. He brought the box over to the display window as Toboe continued cleaning it out. "A gentleman brought these in first thing this morning. I wish you'd been here. He was an odd sort." Mr. Jon also liked to study people and gossip about them; he found humans a "fascinating subject". Toboe was almost glad that he was late; he felt uncomfortable talking about people he hardly knew, especially when the words were not always pleasant.

Mr. Jon sat down in a chair next to the boy and began pulling the old books out of the box. After Toboe finished emptying the window and dusting, he assisted in helping his boss. It was a large box and there were quite a few things varied from all different sorts of genres. The old man handed the boy a few books at a time and Toboe sat them on display in the window, carefully placing them in the perfect spots to be noticed. "Oh, this one was the most interesting." He handed him the book, "Look at it, isn't it beautiful?" Toboe examined the cover, detailed letters thickly bound in leather. "What does it say?"

"That's just it, the man who brought it in didn't know. It must be an old, ancient language. But the pictures inside are lovely as well. I think it must be a children's book of some kind. Take a look." He continued sorting as the boy began to flip through the pages.

Wolves. Again, here they were, but in a book this time. What was going on? Going through the book, he examined each page with detail, the wolves running with the flowers, many flowers. He closed the book and held it down by his side. He felt like he was going to lose it. "Mr. Jon," he asked, "I know I just got here, but would it be okay if I left? I'm really worried about Gran." He had partly lied about that. That was only half of the truth.

Mr. Jon didn't say anything for a moment,"If you think you must." He stood up, a few books in hand and began to place them in the window with the others, repositioning the ones Toboe had already sat in there. Toboe felt a little hurt when he did that, but it was also expected of Mr. Jon. He was very particular. "Don't worry about me. I'll be fine here all by my lonesome self." He sighed.

Toboe frowned but quickly changed his expression when his boss turned to him with a smile, "I'm just fooling with you, Toboe. You can go." He turned back to his books, "There's just not enough time left in this world for all of us to live full lives. So enjoy the time that you have."

"Yes sir!" Toboe ran to the back room to grab his things and quickly returned to the front of the store. Realizing he still held the old book in his arm, he stopped for a moment. "Can I buy this one from you? I don't want you to sell it."

"Well Toboe, that's fine I suppose. That's neat, isn't it? I thought so." he exclaimed.

"Uh, yes… Do you want to take it off my check?" he asked.

"Don't worry about it, we'll discuss it later. You go home and say hello to your grandmother for me. Take care now, all right?" He shooed at the young boy, holding a book in the other hand.

Toboe nodded and hurriedly headed out the door, the sound of bells ringing as the rain fell down.

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><p>What did you think? It's starting to get exciting, huh? I hope there is no one that is getting turned off. I understand that sometimes you just want to get to it already, but have patience. We'll get there soon enough. You know what I mean. ;) Please review! 3<p> 


	4. Chapter 4

Hello! Ok, before I get on with it, I wish you'd guys review me. You don't know how much more that would inspire me to get chapters coming faster! :) I might even try for one a day… :D BUT, yes.. Here is the fourth installment, enjoy!

**FYI:** If you prefer the "uncut" version, please check out adult fanfiction dot net or deviant art.

Caution: Further chapters will contain mature content such as language and yaoi, Tsume/Toboe. Be forewarned.

Disclaimer: I do not own the characters or series of Wolf's Rain. They belong to BONES & Keiko Nobumoto. This story is non-profit for my own and others' enjoyment. Thank you. :)

**Just Run**

The rain wouldn't let up. He tightly held the book against his chest as he ran, occasionally slipping through a puddle or two. He felt rushed and worried; he needed to be home, with Gran. Why didn't he call in? What was going on? What was it with those wolves in his dreams and the book? And that man on the motorcycle?

He felt now as if he were in that dream again, running towards a destination unknown, lost. Just lost and running. The streets were still crowded with people and vehicles but he made it back to their apartment in a short time, as opposed to the morning commute. He hadn't wanted to go to work in the first place, all though he wouldn't have gotten the book that was in his arms.

He glanced down at the book for a moment before he opened the front door, a couple of flower pots at his feet. The door was unlocked again; it happened often. As it slowly opened, an immediate sense of urgency pulsated through him. "Gran!" he gasped, seeing the old woman on the floor. Panicking, he dropped the umbrella and book on the floor and rushed to her side, roughly moving the fallen chair beside her out of the way. "Gran!" he yelled again, shaking her shoulders. There was no response.

He pressed his head to her chest and his breathing quickened, eyes welling up with tears. There was still a heartbeat! She was still alive, thank God! It didn't take a moment for him to grab the phone off the counter and to quickly punch in the numbers. The operator could hardly say anything before he shouted into the phone, "Please! Come quick! She's dying!"

It wasn't long before the boy found himself sitting in a hospital waiting room. It was excruciating. It had been a couple of hours of just sitting there and looking at the clock. He couldn't pick up a magazine or go to get a snack; he couldn't eat. The room was full of people waiting in their seats, each with their own sets of problems. But the worst part was that most everyone was silent. He longed to leave the room, to get a coffee or something. But he had to stay put; it could be any moment now. Any moment Gran would be brought out, most likely in a wheelchair and they could go home.

No.

It wasn't like that, was it?

He began to cry, covering his face with his hands, afraid that others might see. What was he going to do? _"Please God,"_ he thought,

"_I can't do it… I don't want to be alone."_

The waiting room doors thudded, a tall man, obviously a doctor, walking through. Every single person in the waiting room stopped whatever they were doing and stood at full attention. No one knew who the doctor would call on, whether it would be good or bad news, or if he was just simply taking a break.

"Ando? Toboe Ando?"

Toboe didn't say anything for a moment, fearful for the answer.

"Toboe Ando?" He sounded impatient.

Toboe bit his lip and stood up. "All right. Can you come with me, please?" he asked and gestured that he follow him elsewhere. He anxiously followed the doctor into a less crowded corridor of the hospital, shortly down the hall. He held a clipboard with papers in his hand and began to flip through them, a black pen in the other hand. "You might want to sit down-"

"No, I'm fine." the boy interrupted him.

"All right," he grimaced, "There is no easy way to say this, but your grandmother didn't make it." The doctor waited for a reply, but the boy just stared at him with a vacant expression. He continued, "The cardiac arrest she suffered was just too great of an impact on someone of her age." He patted the frozen boy on the shoulder, "I'm sorry for your loss… If you can see Cindy at the front desk, there's some paperwork and she'll take care of the rest." There was still no answer. "Would you like to… see the body?"

That upset him, "She's not a body! She's my Gran!"

The doctor frowned and backed off a little, "Like I said, please see Cindy." He then made his way back down the hall as Toboe stood there, feeling completely helpless and alone.

...

An alarm sounded abruptly, awakening the man from his deep sleep. He groaned and swiped at the alarm sitting on the floor, sending it flying across the room but not shutting it up. He lay there for another five minutes, trying to ignore the beeping annoyance. It was no use.

He pulled himself out of bed, bare tanned legs and feet touching the floor. He frowned at the dirty carpet, knowing that he was to blame, but it still angered him. There was clutter everywhere, clothes, trash, boxes filled with his belongings. But hey, it was a small studio apartment; even the kitchen was in the same room as his messy bed. That was fair, right?

He scratched his bare back and stood up, stretching off any sleepiness that remained. Pulling up his shorts a little, he walked into the bathroom to get ready for the start of another glorious day. He performed the usual shower, shaving and dress then proceeded to the kitchen for a quick bite. Bread rolls; you couldn't go wrong there.

He never really had time for a decent meal, aside from occasional bar food. And that wasn't saying much. He'd never had anyone to take care of him, let alone cook for him. He was efficient though, a smart guy. And even as a child, sometimes you just had to learn things a little earlier than most.

He finished his quick little assessment of himself and grabbed his big black coat, put on his boots and headed out. Those steel plates weren't going to assemble and weld themselves now, were they?

...

When he finally left the hospital the sun had already begun to go down. "I wasted my entire day." He spoke aloud. He was speaking out of hunger, anger and deep, deep sadness and grief. What was he going to do? That thought kept repeating itself in his worried mind. There were so many thoughts, too many thoughts. He didn't want to deal with it. He walked down the sidewalk, noticing that the rain had stopped quite some time ago, the streets still dripping wet. There weren't many people around as there had been this morning. _"I'm not going to work tomorrow."_ he thought to himself.

The boy had his hands in his pocket, looking for some extra change, anything, something to get his mind off things really. Also, he needed a ride home and was hoping to catch a cab. He had ridden to the hospital inside the ambulance with Gran. Gran…

He continued to search his coat and his pockets, but no, nothing. He'd even left his wallet at home.

He gave up and started walking as tear slowly submerged from his eyes, still red and swollen from dealing with it all before. He had been embarrassed, but he'd finally broken down in front of the woman at the counter. She was nice though, helping him with everything. It was when he was reminded that he was the only surviving relative that he began crying. He didn't want a funeral; Gran wouldn't have wanted it either. She would've wanted a celebration of some kind, just anything happier than this.

Just thinking of everything made the tears begin to well up once more, until he heard a familiar sound.

The motorcycle! Wait!

He remembered what had happened that very morning, the bike, the man, that gaze, that frozen moment. He shook his head in disbelief. _"Wait, how many people in this city have those things though?"_ he thought. He began to dismiss the thought until that memory was repeated, the same motorcycle and man with the red helmet whizzing past. He abandoned everything. He didn't stop, he didn't think, he didn't say anything, he just ran.

* * *

><p>So let me know what you thinking by reviewing the fic. Be honest; I won't mind. :) Until next time, have a lovely time~!<p> 


	5. Chapter 5

Hello! Here we are again, already into the fifth installment. I hope you've enjoyed everything up until now. This is the chapter where we finally start getting somewhere, other stages already laid and ready for our beloved boys. Heh heh. Enjoy!

FYI: If you prefer the "uncut" version, please visit

Caution: Further chapters will contain mature content such as language and yaoi, Tsume/Toboe. Be forewarned.

Disclaimer: I do not own the characters or series of Wolf's Rain. They belong to BONES & Keiko Nobumoto. This story is non-profit for my own and others' enjoyment. Thank you. :)

**Into the Night**

The man slowed down the red bike beneath him as he began to turn a corner, ignoring the impulse that shook him as he'd driven past the hospital. He wasn't sure what it had been, that strange feeling that came to him. He had prior and not so good experiences with those types of places, so he was sure that that was what had played into his current thoughts.

Not soon after he made his way around the dimly lit street corner, he saw his destination just right ahead. He pulled into the filled parking lot, next to a large warehouse. There were other cars leaving as he put himself into park, taking off his helmet. The parking lot was not large, but moderate in size, looking small in comparison to the warehouse in which he worked. He walked to the entrance on the side of the large building as a few workers waved as they went past him, finishing their day shifts.

He entered the building, immediately greeted by the muffled sounds of large machinery and tools coming from the other side of the main rooms. He went into the break room and threw his jacket and helmet into his locker, slamming it shut. One would think he was aggravated at something.

Just as he was about to punch into the time clock for his usual shift, he was stopped. "Tsume!" called a man, walking out of the office. It was his boss.

"Am I late?" He was confused for a moment.

"No, not at all! In fact, can you come into my office before clocking in?" He turned around, Tsume following behind him.

The older man relaxed himself into the leather chair behind his desk. "Close the door and have a seat."

Tsume did as he was told, but wasn't sure if he liked the sound of it. _"Fucking hell."_ He thought. All he needed was to lose his job. That was all he had going for him in this stupid city. What? Would he just leave to somewhere else this time? Or maybe he could find something else. This job was decent enough to keep up with his former debt.

"I'm promoting you and changing your shift."

Tsume didn't saying anything, just gawking a little as his employer continued, "You know, I tried to call you but it wouldn't go through. Did you change numbers?" No reply. "Well, anyways, I think you would do better in the inventory department." He held up his hands in defense, "Not that I think the labor department doesn't suit you! In fact, I believe that you're better than this. I like your hard work and effort. You have a drive in you! Intelligent too. You know, you could eventually be promoted to manager of that department. How does that sound?"

The younger man gathered himself for an answer as he looked into his lap. He quickly found the confidence that he needed and looked the older man in the eyes. "I'm honored. That sounds fine. But what about the shift change?" he asked.

"Oh, you would be doing days now. Inventory doesn't do night. That's why I tried to reach you by phone earlier today. I didn't want you to drive all the way down here. But now at least I could tell you in person!" He smiled, standing up from his desk. He then shook Tsume's hand as he bellowed, "Congratulations! And I'll see you tomorrow morning at 8 o'clock!"

Tsume wondered about the old man as he walked out of the building. He thought he was a little off, wanting to be friends with everyone. Sometimes he seemed to ramble on and on. And honestly, he was surprised he made it out of there in such short time. Of course, with no drinks to celebrate. His boss was not that kind of guy, oddly enough. And now he had to drive right back to his apartment. He could've slept in.

It's not that he wasn't grateful. Hell, for a moment he thought he was gonna lose his job, not get higher up in it. And now a morning shift instead? He preferred nights anyways. But maybe this would mean less work for better pay? …Which made no sense. He could do the labor job fine; he was used to it. And he was strong, stronger than a lot of those doing it.

How annoying. "Fucking hell." He said out loud this time as he began to get back onto his motorcycle.

The parking lot was empty aside from the vehicles of the workers inside the building, already starting their shifts. He pulled his thick jacket over himself and pulled each arm through. He began to put the red helmet on when he heard running footsteps approaching from the sidewalk just outside of the gate. Turning his heading, he saw a younger boy who stopped running as he reached the entrance to the lot, breathing heavily, bent over and clutching his knees for air.

Tsume stared at him curiously, frozen with the helmet in his hands. Who was he? And why did he look so familiar? There was a strange feeling that came over him, but he dismissed it as nonsense.

He frowned and yelled over at him, a few feet away, "Are you okay, kid?"

…

The young boy had followed him quickly, and it hadn't even been that far. But still, he was running so fast that he could hardly breathe, his nerves rushing through him. "Yes, I …think.. so." He panted.

"All right then." He watched him place the red helmet over his head, covering up his silver hair. He then revved up the bike, backed it out and slowly proceeded to the gate where he stood, still barely able to stand up. Just a little bit of running shouldn't have done him out this quickly. Was he really out of shape or was it much more than that? This WAS the same person from this morning; he knew it. And he wanted to know why he felt so drawn to him.

He began to do something drastic and unlike him as the man rolled closer to him in the red motorcycle. It was something that Gran would've frowned up, worried for her grandchild's safety. But he didn't care anymore, what else did he have to lose?

"Can you give me a ride?"

"What?" the older one asked, not sure what he'd heard. He didn't even know the kid.

"Um, …can you give me a ride?" He stood up, placing both hands together. "Please? I don't have any money to make it home with. It's not far. I just came from the hospital and-"

"The hospital?" The helmeted man wondered if that was the feeling he had passing that stupid building. He must've seen him on his way to work. But who was he?

"Um, yes. Please, it's not far… I can pay you!" He pleaded.

The older one hated to admit it, but he felt sorry for him. And it was getting kind of dark out, and nothing good happens in the dark. "Well, fine. But it better be quick. I gotta get somewhere and I can't be wasting my time on you." he grunted.

The boy smiled excitedly, "Yes! Yes, it will be! I promise!"

The man looked at him like he was crazy, "Well then, get on."

The boy looked at the bike, remembering that it _was_ a bike. "Oh, ..okay." He walked over to the red motorcycle and attempted to get onto it and behind him with disturbing him. He wasn't quite sure, never having ridden one before. He put one leg up and tried to pull himself up without touching him, afraid to. This guy was kind of scary. …Great, what was he doing?

"Hurry up all ready!" The man shouted at him, sounding angry and impatient.

"I was getting ready to!"

A jolt went through both of them, neither knowing what it was. But each ignored it.

The boy let go of his feelings of insecurity and grabbed onto the man's coat in order to pull himself up onto the bike. He settled in just slightly before the man said, "Hold on." And away they went, jutting out of the parking lot and into the street, quickly making time.

"Where to?!" the man shouted over the noise of the bike. The boy shouted back the easy directions, followed by a thank you with no reply from the man. As they continued on their path, the younger one felt he should say something but he was afraid. He had never put himself in a position like this. He held onto the coated man's mid-section tightly as they sped through the city. He was sort of scared at first, but was slowly getting used to it. He loved the feeling of holding onto someone, even if he didn't really know him. He smiled, feeling relaxed and calm as he rested his head on the man's shoulder.

This made the older one tense up. "Don't get too comfortable! We're almost there!" he yelled, but it was angrily like before.

The boy shot his head back up, frowning, but still decided to take another chance. He longed to get to know this person better. It bothered him incredibly and he wanted to know why. "My name is Toboe!" he shouted loudly, still holding onto him without getting too close for comfort.

There was no answer, so he wasn't sure if he'd even heard him.

It wasn't long before they arrived back to Toboe's destination. He was still on the bike when he looked up at the small apartment building, Gran's flower pots still blooming nicely in the front. He saddened, once again thinking of her. He wished for that to change soon.

"Can you get off now?" the man asked.

"Oh!" Toboe snapped up and quickly got off the bike. He at first expected for him to zoom right out of there, never to be seen again. But he didn't, lingering a moment with the motorcycle quietly humming. Toboe looked up at his eyes, the rest of his head covered by the red helmet. They were golden, unlike any color he'd ever seen before.

He then realized that those eyes were also following his own and he looked down, partly embarrassed for staring. The older one did not take his eyes off the younger one before him.

Toboe did not look up but asked, "So, you didn't tell me your name."

The man hesitated for a moment but answered in a plain tone, "Tsume."

Toboe remained staring at the pavement, "That's a weird name."

"Yours isn't much better."

The boy shot his head up, once again meeting the gaze that still hadn't changed. "So you did hear me?!" He was so happy.

There was no answer, just the low humming of the bike, the broken sounds of the city accompanied by the flicker of an overhead light fixture that needed to be replaced. The man repositioned himself on the bike, readying himself to leave. "Wait!" Toboe stopped him, "I can run in and get some money for you!"

"No." he replied, "My place is on the way."

"Really?! Where?" Toboe smiled, almost desperately trying to make conversation.

"Like I'm gonna tell you." Tsume laughed in a bitter tone, revved the bike up and took off.

Toboe looked after him, feeling confused, satisfied and lonely as the silver haired man disappeared into the night.

…

Once again, please review! : ) And thanks to those of you that do! We're kicking it up a bit now. What will come next? More reviews and votes keep it coming faster, ya know. :D


	6. Chapter 6

Hello! Yay! Another chapter. I'm on a writing roll. And of course, now that we're getting to the meaty part of the story. Nummers… :d As always, enjoy!

**FYI:** If you prefer the "uncut" version, please check out adult fanfiction dot net or deviant art.

Caution: Further chapters will contain mature content such as language and yaoi, Tsume/Toboe. Be forewarned.

Disclaimer: I do not own the characters or series of Wolf's Rain. They belong to BONES & Keiko Nobumoto. This story is non-profit for my own and others' enjoyment. Thank you. :)

**Boy Toy**

The sound of keys jiggled on the knob outside the door. With a little bit of a push, the door was thrust open with a creaking sound. The man entered, closing the door behind him and leaning against it. He grabbed at his helmet, pulled it off and tossed it aside, landing on the floor with a loud thud. Slouching down to the floor, he began to recall what had just happened.

It was him, the boy from that very morning. How could they have ran into each other like that? What kind of game was this? He didn't need it all right now; he had too much going on in his mind as it was. There was money to be made, debts to be paid, other things, everyday things that consumed most of his life.

Toboe. The boy had called himself. Every time the boy had opened his mouth it was like déjà vu, striking every part of his being. It was driving him insane with curiosity. He sighed and leaned back against the worn door, one hand on the dirty carpet while the other rested on his propped knee, the other leg spread out. He closed his eyes, taking in the recent events.

That soft voice, that innocent demeanor, the firm grip around his middle, the color of his hair, even the scent… Everything was familiar to him. He kept imagining the boy standing in front of him when he had first dropped him at his apartment. He was shy and he knew that he had trouble speaking up. So he had waited there, staring at him, waiting for him to say more. He'd wanted him to say more. He wanted to make sense of everything.

His mind wandered to the dimly lit street, the wet on the ground and the reflection of colors bouncing off the boy's pale, milky skin. Why was he so drawn to the kid?

"Toboe…" he whispered.

His own words woke him up from the dream world. Angered, he shot up from his seat and quickly whirled his body around, slamming his fist into the wall. "Fuck!" he yelled, trying to dismiss his thoughts. "Dammit!" He rubbed his head against the wall next to his fist, overcome by his frustration. "Why am I so pissed off?" he groaned, sinking back into his own thoughts that he knew nothing of. He couldn't do this.

…

The young boy walked down the paved sidewalk, auburn hair blowing in the wind. It was sunny and much nicer than the day before. There were light white clouds in the sky and birds swaying on the late morning's lovely breeze. You couldn't even tell it had stormed before, the puddles in the streets nearly dried up. Even people seemed happier as they each made their own ways. It was an amazing change. With the rain came beauty, after all.

He sighed and frowned as he looked down, the boxed lunch he'd made in his hands as he walked along. Was he crazy?

He hadn't done much since the night before. Everything that had played out became so unreal to him. There wasn't a moment in his evening or morning routine that hadn't brought the memories to mind. There were so many things he planned on doing but he'd ended up lost in his thoughts.

He had skipped dinner and soon went to bed after arriving home last night. Gran all too often came to his mind and his eyes would well up each time as he quickly smothered the hot tears into his soft pillow. He couldn't even go into her room. Not yet. The door remained open from across the hall, the room just as neat as always. It reminding him of everything, absolutely everything.

But then there was the silver haired man, Tsume.

It was because he couldn't stop thinking about him that he was where he was, on the way to the man's workplace. He didn't know if he would be there or if he would even notice him. But it was worth a shot; what else did he have to lose?

What else did he have?

It was about eleven when he approached the warehouse district, seeing the tall gate of the warehouse's lot ahead, locked from the inside. He frowned, remembering that it hadn't been locked the night before. It was probably because the workers were still coming and going last night around six. He sighed and sat down on the pavement next to the building's cold, steel gray wall.

He groaned, pulling the pink hat further over his eyes to shield him from the glaring sun. It was another thirty minutes or so before he realized the stupid decision he'd made. "Oh no!" he exclaimed standing up. For the past few minutes the sun had grown much warmer on his skin until he had become uncomfortable. He was going to burn wasn't he? Of course he was, with his ghost like skin.

He groaned and looked around for another spot to wait, selecting a dark slit between the two buildings across the street. He waited for the few cars that were around to go by before he made his way across, tripping on one of his shoelaces. He landed hard, scuffing his face up on the street in the process. He gasped out in slight pain and quickly gathered himself. "Oh no!" he shouted, looking around as he sat up. He saw the food he'd made a few feet from him, close to the curb. It was untouched. He smiled to himself, as he had protected it in the fall.

!

He looked up as the screech was sounded along with a glaring honk. His heart leapt into his throat, his eyes widened and his body frozen. A deer in headlights.

It was no later than a moment's notice that he felt himself being lifted from underneath each of his arms. The colors of everything whirred past him and everything slowed down, almost frozen in time.

He then found himself on the sidewalk, clutching onto a tall, warm body next to him. He realized that he was still alive and began gasping for air. He bent over, hands on his knees, feeling like he was going to become ill. He felt a strong hand on his back, feeling comforted. His life had been spared.

The sound of a car window rolling down came to his ears, "Watch where you're going, moron!" a voice yelled at him.

"Shut up you jack ass!"

Toboe looked up, still bent over. It was him! Tsume! He had saved him!

The older boy was glaring at the blue car in the street, shouting at him. "What speed were you going? You could've killed someone, you idiot! Get the fuck outta here before I call the cops!" The man in the car was shocked at the young man's accusations. He didn't say anything else and quickly sped off, just barely dodging the crime of man slaughter.

The lunch box still sat on the side of the pavement and Toboe left Tsume's touch to pick it up. He turned around smiling, expecting to see his merciful savior. But instead he was greeted by an angry monster. His face fell.

"What the hell did you think you were doing?" the man shouted.

Just then, a few yells were heard from across the street. Toboe looked over; it was the other workers from the warehouse, cheering for their coworker's miraculous performance. "Wow, Tsume!" one shouted.

"Mind your own damned business!" he yelled back.

Toboe was scared now; he was going to get it.

The men quickly cleared out, each of them off to their own lunch breaks. The silver haired man then shot his head back to the cowering boy. "And you, what's your answer?"

The young boy immediately lowered his heading, holding out the boxed lunch in presentation above his head. "I brought you lunch!" he exclaimed. There was no answer for a moment. He waited for a while longer then looked up, still holding the position of his offering.

He met the eyes of the man who had just saved his life by a mere second, whose face seemed to have softened, just a little. "So are you stalking me now?" he asked.

"No!" Toboe shouted. He stood up straight, avoiding eye contact and still clutching onto the food he'd made. "I just thought.." he waited a moment, "I thought that it was nice of you last night, to take me home. I thought I would return the favor." The lunch box was quickly snatched from his arms and he looked up at the man who had taken it from him, amazed.

The young boy relaxed when the older one began to go through its contents. "What's in here?" He sat down on the curb of the sidewalk. Toboe quickly joined him, smiling. "Sandwiches. And cake, too!" The boy looked at the sidewalk, noticing that they were in the shade.

The man examined each sandwich, "Are these tuna?"

"Yes, they're my favorite. I love them." Toboe said cheerfully.

"Well I don't. I hate tuna." He replied plainly.

"Oh," Toboe looked down. He felt very badly all of a sudden, his mood gone from a ten to three. "Well the cake is chocolate. Do you like chocolate?" He looked up again when he heard the man bite into something; a tuna sandwich. The young boy smiled again while sitting next to him on the curb, content with watching him eat the lunch he'd made.

Tsume looked down at him after swallowing another bite, "Are you gonna eat?"

Toboe shook his head, "No, I already did."

The man shrugged and went back to his lunch, silver hair now turned blue from the shadow of the buildings behind them. Toboe stretched back to prop himself on his arms against the cold pavement, throwing his head back and looking around at the tall cityscapes against a bright blue backdrop. He wanted to stay in that moment. He felt safe and he didn't feel alone when he was near this man. It really was a beautiful day.

The empty box was cast aside as the man stood up a few moments later. He didn't say anything as he began to walk back across the street to the warehouse.

"Wait! Tsume!" Toboe also stood up, calling out after him. "Will I see you again?"

Tsume turned around, halfway in the street to face the boy leaning over the curb of the sidewalk. He frowned a little, "What is this, runt? I ate your lunch. Aren't you happy now?" he asked. This boy was persistent. And he didn't want to be bothered. He was drawn to him, but at the same time he longed to be distant from him, a pain of guilt inside of him. And as to why, he did not know.

Toboe looked down, embarrassed. "Well yes… But I want to see you again." He looked him in the eyes now, his hazel eyes blazing and meeting the golden ones across the way, moved by the way he met him. The whistle blew as the two figures stood facing each other, more sounds of the city striking up to be heard. Tsume looked back at the warehouse and groaned, "I have to go."

And that's what he did, leaving the boy on the sidewalk, an empty box at his feet.

…

Eleven o'clock came again the next day and there he was, the boy across the street. He was waiting for him, another box in his arms. He met eye contact with him and glared, not dismissing the gaze, just staring beyond the gate. As his coworkers came up behind him, the gate opening as they spilled out, one stopped as he too noticed the boy.

"Hey, isn't that the kid you saved?" the question came.

"Yes," Tsume sighed.

"What's he doing?" he asked.

"Hell if I know!" he groaned.

The man next to him laughed a little, deciding to poke at his coworker. "Looks like the little guy is smitten by you. Awwwww…"

"Shut up!" the taller man snapped back at him. His coworker did as he was told, not cowering in fear, but still afraid to say anything more. Tsume looked back across the street again as the boy sat there against the building, in the shade, the box now sitting at his side. "He's just lonely. That's all."

"I'll be eating out of the vending machines today." The taller man sighed and walked back into the building. His coworker shrugged and also went on his way, wondering where he was going to get a bite.

The boy across the street frowned when he saw the silver haired man go back into the warehouse. He must not have been hungry. No... He just didn't want to see him.

…

It was like that every day for the next week. Tsume was getting tired of eating from the vending machine. But not only was he getting tired of it, he couldn't afford it. But there was always a box left for him at the end of the day, which he would gladly take to his apartment and eat for dinner. A decent meal was nice once in a while and he himself wasn't very good in the cooking department.

There was a part of him that felt bad for the kid, each day, staring longingly at him from across the street. When was he gonna give up? For God's sake, it'd been a whole week. When was he gonna get the idea that he wasn't interested in making friends.

On the eighth day when the boy wasn't there waiting for him, he didn't find himself relieved like he thought he would be when that day finally came. But he was grateful to get away from that nasty junk food. He wanted something real, a burger maybe. As he slipped on his sunglasses he walked down the sidewalk with the rest of his coworkers, looking at the spot where the younger boy had been sitting every day until now.

Why wasn't he there? Did he really give up? Or did something happen? What if he was in trouble?

As his thoughts began to escalate, one of the men spoke up, "Any one up for a burger?"

Tsume glanced at him, half smiling. "You read my mind."

…

He found himself at the warehouse once again. He'd waited almost every day that week; for Tsume to come out, to talk to him, to do something, anything. But each time he saw him, he would stare for a moment or two and then go back into the big building. The boy would wait until the warehouse's break was and once the workers had all gone back inside, the gate closed, he would leave the box, each day a different meal inside.

When he came back the next day, he wondered if it was Tsume that had taken the box, or if it had simply gotten thrown away. But he waited anyway, each day, with the hope that the man would finally come out to greet him.

It was another sunny day, but it was still cold, as it had been the entire week. He had a light jacket on and his pink hat again, nothing much. He noticed a few men walk out. _"Here they come."_ He thought. It was about that time, eleven or so.

He didn't get his hopes up, but thought that maybe, just maybe he would say hello to him. But if not, at least he would stare for a moment, as it was every day. He had come to long for those stares. The moment when their eyes met he stopped feeling lonely, as if everything were okay in the world and all his troubles gone.

When he saw him come out this time, he watched him do just as he always had before, just stare for a moment or two. But this time, this time it was different. He found it hard to contain his excitement. He was actually coming out to see him!

The boy stood up, just as the wind came rolling through and almost grabbed his hat from him. He pulled it back on and turned around, just as the silver haired man approached him. In the moment that the boy almost lost his hat, the man had slipped dark black sunglasses over his eyes. He stopped in front of him with no smile or frown. He just stood there.

"What's with the hat?" he asked.

"What, my hat? I dunno." Why was he asking him about his hat?

"It looks like a girl's hat. It is pink." He smirked.

The boy glared at him, which startled the man. "My Gran gave it to me! Why do you care?" the young boy snapped at him.

Tsume did not expect that reaction. "So, Toboe," he began.

The boy let go of his frown, not believing how happy he was with his name being spoken by the man in front of him. He looked so cool as the sun beat down on his nicely tanned skin. He could see the muscles and the tone of his flesh beneath the white, long sleeved shirt. His jeans were tight, his boots shone like the dark black of his sunglasses and his silver hair gleamed in the sun light.

"…where were you yesterday?" he continued.

"Yesterday?" Toboe paused, "I had to work."

The older one raised his eyebrows, which the younger one could not see underneath those shades. He preferred wearing these things. People, especially this boy, could not read his emotions or actions that well. It was sort of like hiding in a way.

It was then that the two boys on the sidewalk were approached by a group of men from around the corner. "Tsumeeeee…" one of them called him. The others smiled and joined in with a few small taunts. "Who's your girlfriend?" one asked mockingly as he circled around the back of them. "What? I'm not a girl!" Toboe defended himself angrily.

"Whoaaaa, Tsume! Didn't know you were into that sort of thing?" the first guy spoke again, teasing him with a laugh.

"Shut up!" Tsume snapped, "It's not like that!" He then turned to Toboe, "I told you to leave me alone!" He pushed the boy away from him, who landed painfully on the sidewalk, gathering more scratches. He winced, just as the man who had just pushed him. He then turned back to the first guy, who was obviously their leader. "I don't know him! He's got nothing to do with this, you hear me?"

The four men all looked at each other and smiled knowingly to themselves. They had now all four circled the two figures. "How can you say that, Tsume?" Toboe began to plead with him angrily, clutching the scratch on his face, now reopened and bloody since the day of the car incident.

_"You stupid, fucking kid."_ Tsume thought, beginning to panic to himself. He didn't want the young boy to get hurt. All he needed was more bloodshed on his hands. It was in that moment that one of the men from behind grabbed the younger boy, who cried when he did so. He lifted him up off the ground, now standing, the man clutching the back of his head and a knife to his throat, Toboe's hands holding onto the arm that painfully grasped his long hair.

"Toboe!" shouted Tsume.

"Ha ha!" laughed their leader, "Gentlemen, looks like we've gotta winner!" His facial expression then changed from a delighted one to that of pure malice. His eyes shot like daggers into Tsume's, who glared back at him defiantly.

Even the man's tone changed to one of menace, threatening him, "Now pay up. Or the boy toy gets it."

* * *

><p>Kya! What will happen next? I'm sorry if the title threw you. Heh heh. …Let's say this, if I get atleast three more reviews or votes, I'll definitely add some "fun" to the next chapter if you get my drift. ;) Until then, see you, space cowboy. :P<p> 


	7. Chapter 7

Hello! Here we are again for the 7th installment! Enjoy!

**FYI:** If you prefer the "uncut" version, please check out adult fanfiction dot net or deviant art.

Caution: Further chapters will contain mature content such as language and yaoi, Tsume/Toboe. Be forewarned.

Disclaimer: I do not own the characters or series of Wolf's Rain. They belong to BONES & Keiko Nobumoto. This story is non-profit for my own and others' enjoyment. Thank you. :

**At Long Last**

"I'm working on it, okay?" The silver haired man bit his lip, his stance ready for what, he did not know yet.

"Whadda ya mean, you're working on it? You either got it, or you don't." the man frowned, demanding an explanation, "So which is it, Tsume?"

Tsume looked down, his fist clenched. "I don't have it." He muttered.

"What's that now?" his interrogator questioned.

"I don't have it!" he admitted. "But I'm working on it. I'll get you your money." He turned to face the auburn haired boy who was gripping onto his captor, eyes wide with fear. "Just let the kid go."

The two extra men, aside from the leader and Toboe's captor, just stood idly by. Tsume began to go through the motions, the plans that were running through his head. He glanced at each of them, studying them quickly, wondering if any of them carried a gun. The man holding the boy hostage had a knife to the kid's jugular, but the others? No, they all had their hands in their pockets, all three of them. He could see a few lines, the structures of guns within those pockets. Damn. What was he going to do?

"Okay, how's this?" the man finally spoke up, "We can give you until, let's see... how about the 23rd?"

"What? That's next week!" Tsume yelled, unbelieving what he'd just heard.

"Yeah." He grinned and looked to the man who held the young boy against his will. "But I think we'll keep your boyfriend for leverage though." The boy's captor gripped him tighter and Toboe winced in pain, "Tsume..." he gulped.

Tsume glared at all of them, knowing that he was no match for these four men. It was when he was beginning to create a plan of action in his mind that a familiar sound broke the tension. It was the whistle for the warehouse. The workers began reappearing again, going back to their jobs. A few of them started looking at the spectacle before them, wondering what was going on. Then one of them noticed that Tsume was involved.

"Hey! What's going on?" he yelled over at them. "Tsume! Need me to call security?"

That did it.

The four men all looked at each other. They didn't want to get others involved, especially not the cops. The leader frowned and shrugged, hands still in his pockets. The three others dropped their agenda, along with Toboe who fell to the ground and gasped for air, his hands over his neck. As they began to walk away, their leader called out to Tsume once more, "23rd, got it?" He was deadly serious.

Tsume didn't reply, he just glared at them defiantly as they left, walking further out of sight. He didn't take his eyes off of them until they had completely gone out of view. His coworker called after him once more, "Are you guys ok?"

"Yeah, thanks." Tsume groaned. He tried to regain his composure, thankful he was still wearing dark shades to disguise his current expression. He felt weak, and he hated it. In the moment that had just passed he had felt completely helpless, and it pissed him off to no ends.

"Well, all right. I'm going back in. You coming?" he asked.

Tsume nodded and his coworker left.

He then turned to Toboe, "You ok, runt?"

Toboe was still on the ground, one hand on his neck. He turned to look at Tsume, filled with mixed emotions of fear and relief. He nodded, "Tsume, who were those guys?" he asked.

Tsume didn't look at him; he was still faced in the direction the four men had left. "Don't worry about it." He spoke plainly. "I'm calling you a cab." He began to walk back to the gate.

"No!" Toboe called after him, "What if they come back?" His eyes began to tear up and he felt as if he were going to cry, "They were going to kill me!" He then said something he immediately regretted, "And you just stood there! You didn't do anything!" He clasped his hand over his mouth, eyes wide and looking at the man whose back was to him. He could feel him tensing up in anger. Oh God.

Tsume whirled around, his teeth showing and his brow furrowed in immense anger. He tore off his sunglasses and threw them to the ground. His golden eyes were on fire, intense with rage. "WHAT THE FUCK WAS I SUPPOSED TO DO? YOU FUCKING IDIOT!" He was screaming at full level, "YOU KEEP FOLLOWING ME AROUND LIKE SOME DAMNED STRAY DOG! YOU EXPECT ME TO TAKE YOU IN? IT'S NOT GONNA HAPPEN, YOU HEAR ME? NOW GET THE FUCK OUTTA HERE AND LEAVE ME THE FUCK ALONE!"

The boy's eyes began to well up, his lips quivering. _"Shit."_ thought Tsume.

Toboe immediately stood up as he wiped his eyes with one arm and bolted, leaving the silver haired man in the street alone. He kept running, all the while trying to choke back the tears. He gulped; the tears wouldn't stop. He could hardly breathe, his grief and frustration overwhelming him. He continued running. He didn't even care if he ran into those guys again. He didn't care about anything anymore.

_"Fine,"_ he thought, _"I don't need you, either! Screw you, Tsume!"_

…

"SHIT!" the man screamed, kicking over the few trash cans that were next to the tall gate. They fell over, trash spilling onto the street. He continued to kick them angrily, smashing dents into their sides. "FUCKING DAMNED IDIOT!" He didn't know at this point if he was yelling about the kid or himself.

He had so much anger building up inside of him he felt like he was going to explode, which he just had. But it was in front of the boy, who hadn't done anything. He was just like a stray dog, wasn't he? He just wanted a friend and what had he done? He almost got him killed and then he treated him like a piece of shit. No. _HE_ was the piece of shit, not the stupid kid.

He sighed, his anger finally beginning to release itself.

"Damn it."

…

The bell chimed against the door as it was swung open, the boy entering breathing heavily. The old man poked his head up from behind the counter, the little kitten in his arms meowing and stretching. "Toboe? What's wrong?" he asked as the boy came in, whose eyes were red and his face sweaty. "You're not scheduled to work today."

The boy was bent over, trying to regain his strength before standing up. "Nothing's wrong," he spoke to the floor, "I just need the money, so I came to work." He sniffed.

The man frowned, "Now I know that's not the truth. I wasn't born yesterday. Did you run all the way here?" He examined the boy who finally stood up, but who did not make eye contact with him. He walked over to a pile of tossed books and began to sort through them. "Is it about your Grandmother? I know that all of this has been very hard on you." Toboe didn't reply; he just kept busy. "Look, if you'd like to, I have an extra room at my house if you don't want to be there. I know living at that old apartment must bring a lot of painful memories to-"

"No, it's not that really. I just," he paused, quickly wiping his eyes. Now he was being reminded of Gran too? "I just need to work. Please just let me work." He didn't look at the old man; he just kept sorting and piling the books in front of him.

The old man frowned again and he sighed, "Well, all right. If you want to."

"I do."

…

Four wolves danced in the full moon's light, basking in all of its glory. In circles they ran excitedly, enjoying the folly that they made. There was a clinking sound from a bracelet worn on a red wolf's leg. A young girl twirled round and round in the middle of their circle, pink cape floating, body spinning. Her flowing hair was the color of lilacs, the color of flowers. White flowers bloomed brightly beneath the pale moon's glow. Their scent was alluring as their buds grew and grew in all out beauty.

A gunshot rang out and blood splattered onto the innocent white flowers, forever staining them with a crimson color. The smell of blood took over the sweet scent of the moon's flowers. A dark wolf snarled, his two eyes with different colors. The sound of howling began in the night and the dark wolf lunged forward, set to kill with his teeth blaring yellow and bloody.

The man's eyes opened, startled.

He remained laying in his bed, sheets rumpled and worn. He didn't bother to get up; his alarm hadn't even sounded yet. He sighed, glancing around at the dirty apartment. His stomach rumbled and he groaned, rolling to one side. It had been three days since the incident. He kept thinking of that poor kid and how he'd treated him. He was sure that was it. No more. He would never see him again.

He sat up. He couldn't just leave it at that, could he? Surely the boy would show up again. Each day at work had been such misery to him, to see that sidewalk and remember everything. Why was it bothering him so much? Shouldn't he be able to just let it go and continue on with his life, alone?

But was it really that simple? He was drawn to the runt, and he knew it. It was hard to admit, but there was something about him that he just couldn't shake off. He stuck in his mind, constantly reminding him of not just the events that had happened, but of who he was. It made him think. It pissed him off. It scared him.

He rubbed his head into his hands, groaning. He had to find him, didn't he?

…

It wasn't a very sunny morning, but it wasn't raining either like the last three days. The streets and shops along the sidewalk were lined with brown baskets filled with fruits, vegetables and breads. There were tents filled and tables topped with blankets, ornaments, pottery and other household goods. There were jars filled with spices, herbs and candies. Merchants hollered about their specials, each begging passerby's to stop and take a look, hungry for the money within their pockets.

The young boy carried a couple of tote bags as he looked around at the booths lined up and down the street. He hadn't made a list, but he needed a few things to fill his fridge and pantry. He saw a basket full of red apples; they looked amazing. He picked them up, one by one, examining and choosing the ones that he wanted. He loved Saturdays, especially for the farmer's market, which wasn't too far down the road from his house.

He paid the merchant a few coins and moved onto the next booth which was selling freshly baked bread. The aroma filled his nostrils and he smiled, almost salivating at the smell. It was then that he noticed that he was being watched from across the way. He glanced up just as a silver haired man ducked back around the corner from which he came. The boy became excited and he almost called out to him but then he immediately felt let down.

He recalled what had happened a few days ago, how much it had hurt and how it had torn at him. He had felt so rejected and hurt. He was afraid to try again, knowing that he would just be dismissed as before. But then why was he here? It couldn't just be a mistake, could it? Was he looking for him? Maybe he felt bad? He must have!

"Tsume!" he yelled, running in the direction the man had disappeared.

Once the boy turned the corner, he saw that his watcher was no longer there. He looked in every direction, but he wasn't around. He was gone.

…

He walked through the twisted and narrow alley ways, hands in his pockets. He stepped in a puddle, left over from the day before. He groaned, shaking off his now soaked boot. He looked up at the cracks of sky high above the tall and crooked brick buildings surrounding him. He sighed and spoke to himself, "What the hell was I thinking?"

He couldn't do it. He just couldn't. He had seen the boy in the market, shopping. He'd been watching him for quite some time, wondering when to make a move. And then when the moment came, when the kid saw him, he ran. Like a coward.

"Shit!" He was frustrated. Why wasn't this easy? What he said wasn't that bad, was it? He felt like it was something more, something that kept him away from the boy. But there was something else there as well, something that magnetized them to each other. Gravity.

He was sure he had lost him; he had been walking for a few minutes, going in and out of the maze-like alley ways. He stopped and leaned against the cold stone wall behind him, slouching down and sitting on the cracked and graveled pavement. He threw his head back against the bricks, stretched one leg out and rested an arm on his other knee. He sighed, _"It has to be this way, doesn't it?" _he thought.

The sound of dripping fell from the high roof above, landing on the box next to him. He watched each drop intently, finding himself becoming relaxed. He was fine in this alley way, alone. There was no one around, and he was fine with that. Wait. Something caught his eye.

He glanced over past the broken box and saw a white flower, blooming from a crack in the pavement. He was frozen. He had seen flowers before, but this one was unlike anything he had ever seen in his lifetime. In his dreams there were always many flowers. And they were just like this one. He gasped, his eyes wide, his body shaking.

He breathed in the sweet scent and it hit him, a powerful surge of memories that flooded into him, memories from where he had no idea. He remembered another city, many cities, the sound of sirens, gunshots firing, dense forests filled with tall trees. He held onto his chest, throwing his head back and closing his eyes. He saw vast amounts of land covered in snow falling from the sky.

_"Tsume!"_ a voice spoke to him within the flood of memories. _"Tsume!"_ There were many voices, each one calling out his name. _"Where are we going?"_ He grabbed his head, _"To paradise!"_ The voices echoed in his head.

He remembered… everything.

His eyes were wide. He couldn't breathe. He looked down to the ground. "Toboe…" he whispered. He imagined the young boy again, standing there, calling out to him in his memories. _"Tsume, c'mon!"_ The kid was smiling. He wanted to follow him.

The sound of running footsteps getting closer pulled him back into the present. They were getting closer, but was it real? He still felt lost in his mind, unsure of these new moments introduced to him. "Tsume!" a voiced called out. No, really?

He moved to his right, seeing himself in the puddle beneath him. But it was not a man who looked back at him. It was a silver wolf.

He saw a young boy run past the open alley way. "Toboe!" he called out to him urgently. The sound of shoes skidded to a halt and he soon was greeted by a heavily breathing boy at the end of the alley way. "Tsu..me.." he gasped for air. But then his eyes widened when he saw not a man standing in front of him, but a wolf with piercing, golden eyes.

"Tsume?" He asked as their eyes met; he didn't know what to think.

It was then that he was leaning on the side of the wall that he saw something past the wolf. A white flower. The Lunar flower…

Tears welled up in his eyes and he began to cry as the sweet scent filled his nose. "No… It's not. It's not possible." he sobbed. He rubbed his eyes with his arm, shaking and stumbling to the ground, dropping the bag of apples that spilled out onto the cement.

"Toboe! Do you remember?" The wolf called out to him.

Toboe nodded, smiling and crying at the same time.

The grey wolf abandoned everything and ran to the sobbing boy but greeted a red wolf instead. The two figures collided into each other with an unmatched abundance of joy, tears now welling up in the older one's eyes as well. The red wolf whined and nuzzled into the grey one's neck who allowed him to do so, also nuzzling into him. He nudged his snout under the older one's who in return firmly pressed against his neck. He whined again joyfully and began licking the larger wolf's face and ears, wagging his tail.

They had finally found each other, at long last.

* * *

><p>I don't have anything to say, really. But what about you? Review, please. :)<p> 


	8. Chapter 8

Hello! There's a lot, isn't there? I am aware that I am potentially creating a little book, but that's ok, isn't it? Love grows; it takes time. ;P Enjoy! And don't forget to review… I'd love to hear some feedback from the fans.

**FYI:** If you prefer the "uncut" version, please check out adult fanfiction dot net or deviant art.

Caution: Further chapters will contain mature content such as language and yaoi, Tsume/Toboe. Be forewarned.

Disclaimer: I do not own the characters or series of Wolf's Rain. They belong to BONES & Keiko Nobumoto. This story is non-profit for my own and others' enjoyment. Thank you. :)

**Lovely Things**

A cold wind blew through the alley way as the two figures huddled together to escape the chill. The older one was sitting against the cold, brick wall as the younger one laid next to him, resting his head on his lap. He was content as the silver haired man slowly stroked his hair. "Tsume?" the boy asked.

"Hmmm?" the man replied, still petting the boy's head.

"Was it the flower that made us remember everything?"

Tsume thought about it for a moment, "Probably. Remember when we first met Cheza? We were awakened then. Just like now." He felt so relaxed in that moment as he held the boy close to him, his head leaning back against the wall and looking to the overcast sky.

"Oh," Toboe sighed and then he sat up, Tsume's hand still on his head, "What about Cheza? Or the others? Do you think they're around somewhere too? I mean, that flower is hers, right? " His mind was racing with many thoughts, one idea jumping from one to the other.

Tsume met his hazel eyes and frowned, pressing the boy's head back onto his lap, petting him again. "I don't know, Toboe." he replied with a grimace.

Toboe sighed, realizing the older wolf was treating him like a pup just as before, patronizing him. He shook off the older man's hand and sat up again, pouting. "Tsume, maybe they're looking for us! There's gotta be more flowers than just this one to make them wake up!" he exclaimed, seriously considering the thought.

Tsume looked at him and growled, "Look, can you just drop it for now?" He could feel that boiling sensation in his stomach and wasn't glad to welcome it back. He had finally made sense of things and wanted to keep his mind at ease.

"But Tsume…" Toboe looked in the older man's eyes who would not meet his own. He wondered why Tsume didn't want to talk about it. But it he didn't want to press him too much either. The wolf had a short fuse, if he remembered everything correctly. Just then his stomach growled and he blushed.

Tsume smirked, "You hungry, runt?"

Toboe frowned at first but then he smiled at the man who now met his glance. "You know," he spoke, "it used to bother me when you called me a runt. But I don't mind it anymore. I like it now."

"Ok then, runt." the man smirked again.

The boy grimaced at the word. Well, maybe he was lying. Maybe it did bother him after all.

It was then that the older one's stomach also began to grumble. Toboe laughed as the silver haired man groaned, "You want to get something to eat, then?" he asked. The boy nodded happily.

…

The man bit into the flaky croissant, savoring the buttery flavor and the thick, doughy texture. He loved bread. "Is it good?" the boy asked.

"Huh?" he replied.

"You're making funny sounds whenever you take a bite." he spoke again, this time with a chirp in his voice. The man blushed slightly, "So what?" he snapped.

The young boy shrugged, still smiling. There was nothing Tsume could do or say to bring his mood down. He could not believe how happy he was. _It was the best day of his life_, he thought as he walked along, ahead of the man. He looked around at the vendors in the market, picking up food items to buy for dinner. "Do you like eggplant?" He turned to ask the man who was following him as he picked up the purple vegetable.

Tsume was still munching on his snack, breadcrumbs pasted on his mouth. "Never had it." he spoke between bites.

"I'm getting it!" Toboe smiled. He knew the older wolf was just trying to act tough in front of the rest of the world. But he knew who he really was behind that stone cold exterior. The boy went from booth to booth as the older one tagged along, looking forward to the dinner that was going to be made from all of the items they picked up.

The boy so badly wanted to hold his hand. He was so excited. But he knew he couldn't do that unless he wanted to get yelled at. But he didn't care, really. Every now and then he looked up to Tsume's face and smiled to himself, still not believing how everything had worked out. He felt like he was in a dream.

It was like this for a couple of days, the two of them together. It was hard for them to be apart from the other and they spent every available moment together, whether it was shopping for groceries, talking about things of the past or just simply sitting next to each other.

Toboe loved it when Tsume would get too sleepy or too drunk to go home, so he would sleep over on the sofa. The boy would stare at the sleeping man's body while drinking a hot cup of tea, or in the night during bathroom breaks. Just to see him there, to be near him was something he longed for every day. He even tried to plan his work around the same schedule as Tsume's, as long as Mr. Jon agreed to it.

One night when the older one came over after work, the boy had made them sandwiches, just like the first time he had cooked for him. Tsume walked in the door, closing it behind him, exhausted and body aching. He sighed and put his helmet on the side table next to the sofa. "Kid," he groaned, "You're lucky I even came by. I think I'm gonna die tonight."

"Why's that?" the boy asked, setting their places at the table in the small kitchen.

"I gotta hard job; that's why. I don't get to work at some bookstore just reading all the time." He sat down at the table in a thud and relaxed for a minute before bending over to remove his boots. "You just don't get it, do you?"

Toboe frowned, not looking at him as he chopped a few vegetables on the counter top. He had forgiven Tsume many times up until now for saying hurtful things, just shrugging them off, knowing that the man didn't really mean it. But he was beginning to get sick of it. Each time it hurt. Each time it was a new wound gashed in his side from someone he cared about. That was the worst part of it.

"Why do you keep saying things like that?" he spoke up, still not facing him.

Tsume looked at him, curious as to why there was this reaction. "What do you mean?" He didn't want to ask that, but felt he must. He was trying, granted. He was trying very hard.

"Mean things." spoke Toboe, beginning to get a little teary, "Sometimes it reminds me of before…" He began to think about the first time they met and how he was affected by the killing of that girl's bird. Tsume had been so cold to him. But he had changed since then, hadn't he? "I know you're not like that, Tsume. You're not… Not really."

"_I believe in you, Tsume."_ Toboe's former words came to the man's mind. Why did this kid have so much faith in him, faith in things that even he himself couldn't see? It was just like before, wasn't it?

Tsume looked down at the large salad bowl as the boy set it on the table, along with the plate of sandwiches. Toboe began scooping the salad onto the man's plate and then his own. As the silver haired man took a sandwich and bit into it, he noticed there was something different than what he had remembered from before. "Hey, there's no tuna on this."

The boy looked at him, surprised. "But, what… you said before? You said you didn't like tuna?" he asked.

"Well, I ate it then, didn't I? It doesn't matter to me what you make. I would eat it." He continued with his sandwich. Toboe smiled and enveloped him into a hug from behind. Tsume did not expect this and stopped eating, shocked. "I forgive you, Tsume." spoke Toboe, hugging him into his small embrace. He was further surprised when the older wolf did not push him or pull away; he just let him hug him.

However, after a few minutes he reached up his hand and patted the kid on the arm, saying, "Ok, ok. That's enough for now. Why don't you eat something?" Toboe could hear the eye roll in his tone and smiled to himself. This was the real Tsume that he knew. He was not the cold and heartless animal that he pretended to be; he was a strong and caring person who cared for him just as much as he did for him.

Toboe nodded, taking his seat and also beginning his dinner. The two figures sat at the table, eating their meals and not saying anything for a while. Even after they finished they stood together in the kitchen, cleaned everything up and didn't say anything while doing so. Toboe washed each dish and then handed it to Tsume, who rinsed them and placed them on the rack to dry. Each enjoyed the other's company; there was no need to say anything.

It wasn't until later when they were sitting on the sofa together that Tsume spoke up. "I don't have to work tomorrow."

Toboe's face lit up with glee and his body moved in closer to the older man. He smiled, looking up at him with adoring eyes. The man imagined him with big, pointy red ears and a wagging tail. He blushed a little and looked the other way. "I know what I want to do!" the boy exclaimed all excitedly.

Tsume looked back at him, wondering how he could go from one emotion to the other so quickly. "What's that?" he asked.

"I want to see where you live!" the boy answered.

Tsume looked away again, frowning. "I don't know if that's such a good idea."

"Why not?" the boy asked again. He was beginning to poke and the older man did not like it. He couldn't just admit to him that his apartment was not in the least bit as nice as it was here. It was old, filthy and in a bad neighborhood. To be honest, he was embarrassed. But the boy persisted on poking at him.

"Tsumeee… I want to see. Please can I see? I'm just curious." He was literally pushing the man now, leaning into his side and rubbing against his arm. The man's face became red and he pulled away, "FINE! JUST GET OFF OF ME!"

The boy did as was told to do, afraid that if he didn't, he would get bitten by a big wolf with sharp teeth. He scooted down to the opposite end of the sofa, looking back for any expression in Tsume's face. The man just stared at the blaring television, keeping his eyes completely off of the boy. He was not in the mood for conversation, let alone snuggling. And being physically close to someone was what the younger wolf longed for in that moment, to be warm and comfortable on such a cold night.

After a few minutes, the boy spoke up softly, "So are you going to stay here tonight?" No reply, he continued, "I think if you did, then we could go sometime tomorrow. We could do something else too. We could get lunch or go see a movie. I don't work either. Isn't that great?" He was creating a vocal list of things to do. But mostly he was trying to break the uncomfortable silence and tension that was so thick in the room. He didn't get a response right away, and kept looking to the older boy who was avoiding eye contact. "Tsume?"

"What?" he asked. He had heard the boy, he was just trying to desperately ignore him.

"Are you going to sleep here tonight?" Toboe asked again, holding his knees up against his body.

Tsume sighed, "I suppose so."

"Can I sleep with you then?" the boy asked.

The man's face fell into an expression of embarrassment and horror, "What?" he yelled. "No! No, you can't sleep with me!" He became very defensive.

"Oh," Toboe looked down to the floor and spoke shyly, "Well what about my bed then? Will you sleep with me in there?"

Tsume didn't say anything; he just stared at the boy with a startled look.

"It's just that it gets so cold here," the boy continued, still looking at the floor. "Why is it such a big deal?"

"It's not!" the man snapped back. "You're the one who wants me to stop calling you a runt! But you're acting like one right now. What am I supposed to do?" he tried to reason with the kid. He was old enough to sleep by himself. Besides, what did he do before he came along? The boy was just taking advantage of the situation. He was getting spoiled.

Toboe then stood up, "Fine. I'm going to bed now." He sounded a little angry.

"Great, are you mad at me now?" Tsume groaned.

"No! I'm tired so I'm going to bed!" he snapped back. He wasn't mad. He was embarrassed.

The boy walked down the hall and to his bedroom, shutting the door behind him.

Tsume sighed in relief. _"What is it with that kid?"_ he thought. He knew that they were both glad to be in each other's lives once again, but the clinginess of the boy was beginning to get on his nerves. He just wasn't that touchy feely kind of guy and did not plan on changing any time soon just to fit the boy's needs. So the kid was just going to have to get used to it.

He stretched out on the sofa, pulling the throw from the back of the furniture onto his body. He turned off the television and stared at the ceiling in the dark. The only light present was coming from the moon outside the window. It was blue tonight. God, he loved blue moons. He loved the way that everything turned blue when it was like this. It made him feel alive and excited.

He stretched his arms out over his head and closed his eyes, knowing that tonight would be another good night of sleeping peacefully. Things had changed now and he was looking forward to a future. As he drifted into a deep sleep, the images of past events came to his mind. Snow would toss up from the ground as the wolves ran through it, the sound of the wind nestling through the trees and the silence of the beautiful night…

…

"_Tsume…"_ a woman's voice spoke to him. The man looked around as he stood atop a green and grassy hill, overlooking the city below. The sky was bright blue, the sun shining brightly. A strong, cold wind came gusting through and he could smell the leaves floating through the breeze and the rustling strands of grass. He turned around to find where the voice had come from; a young woman sitting a few feet behind him. He smiled and returned to her side.

The woman gathered into herself from the cold wind as the man immediately took off his jacket and wrapped it around her. _"Thank you."_ she smiled. The wind came once more, blowing her delicate blond locks around her. He gazed at her smiling, imagining if anything else in the world could ever be this perfect.

"I'm sorry, but she's gone." a man's voice interrupted their moment.

He stood up and looked around, realizing that the woman was nowhere to be found. He now found himself not in a grassy, beautiful field, but on a cold and dreary city street. "What do you mean?" he asked, "I saw her two days ago! We planned to meet here today!"

"She's dead."

"No, she's not!" he shouted. "I just saw her! Do you hear me? I just saw her! Where is she?"

"I'm sorry, but it's too late for that."

"Too late? What do you mean? Don't tell me that!"

"Tsume."

"What?"

"Tsume…"

"WHAT? WHAT DO YOU WANT?"

His eyes shot open and he sat up, drenched in a heavy sweat. He looked around, trying to get a good grip of his surroundings. He saw that he was still at the boy's place and on the sofa. He placed his head in his hands, groaning to himself in frustration. "Tsume…"

He looked down from where the voice came. It was on the floor, where the boy laid with a blanket and pillow, next to the sofa where he lay. The man sighed and laid down again, on his side so he could still watch the sleeping boy. "What's wrong with you, kid?" he asked him, knowing there would be no answer. "I still don't get it. I never did." He slowly reached a hand down, pulling back a few strands of the auburn hair. "I just don't understand why you'd want to get mixed up with someone like me."

He laid there petting the boy's head, as he had when they first remembered their past events together. Eventually he fall back to sleep again, the blue moon still shining through the window.

But this time, Tsume only dreamt of lovely things.

* * *

><p>So, I cannot put this fic down. I'm getting excited to see what happens myself. Haha… a fangirl will never die.. Until next time! :)<p> 


	9. Chapter 9

Hello! I can't believe we're already on chapter 9! Enjoy!

**FYI:** If you prefer the "uncut" version, please check out adult fanfiction dot net or deviant art.

Caution: Further chapters will contain mature content such as language and yaoi, Tsume/Toboe. Be forewarned.

Disclaimer: I do not own the characters or series of Wolf's Rain. They belong to BONES & Keiko Nobumoto. This story is non-profit for my own and others' enjoyment. Thank you. :)

**Everything Goes Black**

It was about four in the afternoon the following day, before they went over to Tsume's place. The boy had been bothering him about it since the morning, but the man had been avoiding the subject. It was when they were out on some errands that it was actually Tsume that had brought it up, by accident. But that wasn't before Toboe's conversation led to the idea of course.

"So," he asked as they walked along the sidewalk together, "Do you think you're going to sleep over again? Do you have to work tomorrow?"

"Yeah," the man replied, "I work all day." He was carrying a bag filled with groceries, knowing that it was not that many days ago when he had done this. Today was slightly overcast with no sun to be seen, just grey clouds against a grim celadon sky. The morning news had said that the city would most likely see rain today, so Toboe had brought an umbrella just in case.

"But are you staying over again?" the boy asked once more, a slight sound of pleading in his tone.

Tsume looked down at him; he sure as hell was persistent, and needy too. He sighed, "Again? Look, I need a good night's rest and the couch isn't doing it good enough. Like I said, I gotta work tomorrow." He looked up to the sky as a small hint of thunder sounded in the distance. "It's gonna rain in a minute."

Toboe looked up as well, getting his umbrella ready to expand. "Well, how far is your apartment?" he asked.

The man looked back down at him, realizing what he'd done. "Not too far." He sighed.

The boy smiled. He knew that for his friend to let him see his apartment was a big step. He had trust issues, not only from his past life, but from this time around as well. It was hard for Tsume to give in to something like this; he couldn't just let people in immediately, not even him.

It took them another twenty minutes to venture to the older wolf's place, having left the motorcycle at the younger one's building. But they hadn't planned to stop by the other apartment anyway; at least Tsume hadn't.

As they approached the building, the boy could see that Tsume was not kidding about it being a bad neighborhood. The sounds of sirens, dogs barking, loud music and occasional bantering echoed through the streets, alarming him a little bit. He latched onto the older man's arm and was startled when he did not pull away from; he just let out a small grumble.

The boy decided to speak up and talk about happier things, as he was a bit nervous. "So, you know your motorcycle is still at my home?"

"Yeah. So?" the man plainly replied.

"Well," Toboe started again, "You have to come get it, right?"

"Don't have to. I can walk tomorrow. Or take the bus. I'll come by on my way home."

"Oh," the boy frowned, "Well…" He was afraid to continue, but did so any way. "Well, could I stay here then?" He looked up at Tsume, expecting him to growl and throw him off of his arm.

"I don't know, runt." He frowned, "Besides, I don't really clean. So be prepared." He paused but then continued, "I told you this place was shitty. Can't you see that yet? Look around."

Toboe silently agreed with him. But then he thought of an idea, "Oh! You're gone at work tomorrow!"

Tsume looked at the excited boy on his arm but didn't say anything.

"I could clean! While you're gone I could clean for you!" The boy was very happy with his idea, "It would be great! And then I'd make dinner for when you got home too." He smiled again, began to calm down and looked forward to the cracked pavement. His expression and tone softened as he leaned in closer to the tall body next to him. "I can take care of you, Tsume… Just let me." He then smiled at him.

The man bit his lip, thought for a minute and then pushed the kid off of his arm. Seriously? He was a grown man; he didn't need some young pup to "take care of him".

The boy stumbled backwards but caught his balance. He frowned and put both hands into his pockets, seeing that the older one wouldn't even make eye contact with him now. _"That was stupid."_ He thought.

"This is it." The man said a few seconds later. Toboe looked up at the tall, old building as he followed Tsume to the front door. It swung open with a push as he noticed that the doorknob was broken. He frowned, catching the door before it slammed back into him. The man hurriedly ran up the stairs, the boy quickly following behind. It was four flights up until they finally stopped, Toboe bent over and catching his breath. Tsume looked back to him and rolled his eyes, "You always that pathetic?"

"Shut up!" the boy snapped at him.

The man laughed and reached into his pocket with the free hand while still carrying the bag of food. He pulled out his keys and looked up, noticing a posted note on the door. He froze, reading it. "Shit." He muttered.

Toboe looked up as his friend swore, also hearing footsteps slowly descending from the stairs above them. He glanced upwards, noticing the same four men that had assaulted them days ago. He immediately jumped behind Tsume who took a prepared stance, one arm stretched in front of Toboe in attempt to protect him. The older one may have not been able to do anything the time before, but not today. He would rather die first than feel like shit again.

Their leader was not smiling this time, but held the expression of a man who had been ignored and lied to. He was pissed and ready for what he deserved. "So," he growled and looked the silver haired man into the eyes as he approached him, "You realize that you're past due?"

"No, I'm not!" Tsume growled back at him, "I left you the payment in the usual spot!"

"Fuck no! I didn't agree to that, you shitbag!" the man snapped back angrily. "I asked for the full payment on your account and all you did was give me a fucking small piece of it!"

"That's a lie! You never said that!" Tsume defended himself, "You gotta be crazy if you think I could've gotten you all of it that fast! You're outta your fucking mind…" He was just as angry as the man who had confronted him.

The leader didn't say anything but looked past Tsume, to the boy who stood shaking and frightened behind him. He straightened his stance and sighed, both hands in his pockets. "Fine," he finally spoke, "If that's the way it's gonna be… Kev! The boy!" The other man to his side stepped out and approached the two figures quickly.

"Like hell!" Tsume jutted forward right before the man could grab Toboe, striking into his jaw with his shoulder, sending the man stumbling back from the blow. The thug grabbed his face and yelled as blood began to trickle down his fingers. "You fucker!" he screamed, pulling out his knife and extending the sharp blade.

"Toboe! Out the window! NOW!" Tsume yelled at him.

"What?" Toboe yelped and looked behind him, seeing the escape window at the end of the hall. He glanced at Tsume whose face was both furiously angry and fearful. He wanted to stay; he wanted to help but he knew he couldn't. Hoping that Tsume would soon follow him, he made a quick dodge for the window as the man with the knife charged after him.

Tsume took that moment to throw the bag full of groceries at the three other men, produce, canned goods and boxes flying at them with full force. The leader of the group fell over and into one of his lackeys as the fourth man jumped aside from the mess.

Tsume then immediately jumped in front of the running boy to stop the charging man, knife in hand. He jumped back, almost missing the swinging knife that cut into his upper left thigh. He winced painfully as his blood splattered onto the wall next to him. The man continued to swing the weapon at him as the silver haired man tried to dodge each attack.

His eyes glanced over at the fourth man coming his way and he took advantage of the opportunity. As the guy reached him, he grabbed onto his arm and quickly swung him into his attacker's path. The man screamed as the sharp knife was driven into his gut and he fell over, stumbling to the ground. The second man who'd stabbed him gasped, standing there shocked with his eyes widened as he watched the man fall below him.

Tsume bit his lip and looked back at the mess he'd made right before he ran for the escape window. Even though he possibly made things worse, he had at least bought himself a little bit of time.

Their leader screamed as he tried to regain his footing, pushing the third man off of him as the food mess rolled off of his clothes. "FUCK! DON'T LET THEM GO!"

Tsume leapt out of the window and onto the escape ladder, quickly running down it. Toboe was just ahead, having trouble making it all the way down. "HURRY UP! GO!" He screamed and grabbed onto the boy as he hurriedly tried to escape the men. The sounds of bullets ricocheted against the rusted escape ladder as the men above shot at the two figures running away from them. They quickly made it to the ground and took off in a full run.

Toboe screamed as bullets flew past them, one sending more of Tsume's blood spurting out as it tore a small chunk of flesh off the man's right shoulder. Tsume winced and grabbed the kid underneath his arm with the full strength that he could manage, quickly sending them flying into an alleyway. Toboe yelped as he was picked up off of his feet as bullets continued to fly at them until they were out of view from their attackers.

A minute later Tsume dropped the boy who stumbled a little at first but then hurriedly ran after him through the crooked alleyways. "Tsume!" he cried, trying to keep up with the older man's pace.

"C'MON! RUN DAMNIT!" Tsume snapped back at him. The boy nodded and regained his strength to follow. He thought he was going to die, hit by a bullet at any moment when the men finally caught up with them. A thought then occurred to the older one, "Toboe! Change!" he yelled at him.

"What?" he yelled forward, trying to keep up.

"CHANGE! CHANGE INTO A WOLF!" the man screamed.

"I CAN'T!" Toboe yelled back, tears now in his eyes.

Tsume growled, realizing that neither could he. It wasn't like this before in their past lives; what was the deal now?

They ran across a busy street, just barely missing the whizzing, honking cars that sped by. Tsume glanced ahead at the alleyway past the sidewalk, seeing a small alcove behind an old dumpster where they could possibly be safe for a moment or two. He knew the boy could only keep up for so long, and he was also losing strength and blood.

He ran into the small slit between the tall buildings, ducking behind the dumpster up against the cold brick wall. Toboe followed, sliding in next to him. "Tsume! I-" The man placed his hand over the boy's mouth and pushed him against the back of the wall facing him, Tsume looking out over the dumpster to the street.

That moment of a couple of minutes seemed like it lasted for hours. Toboe looked up at the chiseled jawline and neck above him as his companion watched out for their assaulters, his strong hand still over his mouth. The boy was sweaty and teary. He could smell the man's scent, musky and sweaty, accompanied with the permeating smell of blood. Blood? Toboe frowned as he saw that his friend had a couple of wounds, blood dripping from the gashes.

"Shit!" Tsume ducked back down, his face just a couple of centimeters from Toboe's. He had seen the three men coming out of the alleyway across the street, the fourth one missing. Missing? Oh, the one who was stabbed with the knife. He frowned.

He then decided to just barely poke his head around the corner to see what they might do next. It looked like the leader was telling the other two to split up and search. Great. That wasn't good. But the street was wide, the sidewalks busy and filled with an alleyway between almost every building. They could search anywhere. Hopefully they had a little more time to regain their strength.

The sky was getting darker as the evening and the storm approached. They had already lost the umbrella during the chase, so there was no use for that. But right now, the biggest concern was the remaining three men after them.

After he knew they were in the clear for a moment, Tsume took his hand off the boy's mouth. "I'm sorry." He muttered. He felt terrible for the mess he'd put the kid in, but Toboe thought it was for silencing him when he held his hand over his mouth. But the older wolf was probably right for doing it; he may have given them away. He had been so frightened until this moment, where he was backed in the corner of the cold wall against the dumpster, his strong companion hovering over him, protecting him.

"Tsume, you're hurt." The boy realized it again, wanting to touch the wounds but also knew it would get him yelled at, deservedly so.

"I'll be ok." Tsume groaned, "What about you? Did you get hit anywhere?" He knew the boy was all right; he would have been able to smell blood if he wasn't.

Toboe nodded and looked up to meet the golden eyes that looked down at him, the strong body still hovering over him. Even now, with everything that had happened, he still felt safe when he was with him. They held each others' gaze for a while, listening into the sounds of the city around them as the storm loomed over.

Thunder struck loudly with a flash of lightning, causing Toboe to yelp and grab onto Tsume, who held onto him. The boy's breathing slowed once more as the rain started coming down, beginning to drench the two figures huddled together against the brick wall and cracked pavement beneath them.

The older one looked down to the younger one, whose auburn hair was now dripping wet, his pale skin beginning to shiver. The boy's warm breath escaped his lips against the cold rain. Tsume didn't care anymore. Nothing else mattered right now. Nothing else but this moment.

The man leaned in and pressed his lips to the quivering ones below him, waiting for a response. He pulled back when there was none, his face now softened as he gazed into the boy's hazel eyes. Toboe looked at the man before him, more sweet and gentle than he'd ever seen him before. Raindrops were running down his face and body, soaking him thoroughly as he stood over him, his body pressed against his own. There was something different now in those golden eyes as he held that haunting stare. He could feel his warmth regardless of the cold rain and his scent, a sweet musk.

"Tsume…" he breathed. The boy's mouth was once again met by the strong lips. He closed his eyes, releasing all of his fears, past, present and the future.

Tsume continued the kiss, not wanting to part from the lips, the boy who had accepted his gesture. Toboe moaned softly and it excited him, causing him to press his body further in against him. It began to develop into more. He felt the boy's hand touch him on his shoulder blade and he broke their kiss as his body began to tighten. He paused for a moment and looked into Toboe's hazel eyes once more, now filled with longing and desire for him. He cupped the boy's chin in his hand, his face now soaked with the falling rain. He kissed him again and the Toboe wrapped his arms around Tsume's neck, pulling him closer.

The rain fell, hitting the pavement and washing away the dirt on the ground. The sounds of cars splashing through puddles muffled the moans of the auburn haired boy. Tsume pulled him even closer to him, pressing him against the brick wall as his arms wrapped around the boy's middle. Toboe let out a soft cry, aroused by the man's demeanor now suddenly turned aggressive. "Ah! Tsu…me." he breathed. The man slipped his tongue into the boy's mouth, whose tongue also met his, moaning as their mouths ravaged each other.

As Tsume began to venture his hand up the boy's shirt, they heard an all too familiar voice come from nearby. "Did you check over there?" They stopped everything as they rushed back to the present reality at hand. The three men were still after them and they had taken enough time in hiding.

Tsume winced in pain as he began to stand up and stumbled, Toboe catching him before he fell. The boy bit his lip, "Ok, I'm going to lure them away so you can get away!" he decided.

"Are you kidding me? This again?" Tsume replied with a groan.

"The street is busy! They can't shoot me with people around!" Toboe looked to the alleyway and began to take off when the older man caught his shirt, pulling him back. "No! You can't do this!"

"Tsume…" Toboe pulled away, frowning. "I'll be fine! I won't leave you, I promise." The man in front of him froze as he gripped onto his bleeding shoulder. "Please, let me do this!" the boy finished and Tsume reluctantly let him go.

The moment he said that he turned and ran, but instead of seeing a boy leave his side, Tsume saw a red wolf. He dashed out onto the sidewalk just as two of the men approached. He snarled with his teeth bared, daring them to challenge him.

"_Shit!"_ the man thought, _"What the hell are you thinking?"_ He stood up, feeling even weaker than before. He grimaced as pain shot through his leg that had been slashed open. Biting his lip, he decided to do something about the situation. He was not going to stand by and watch Toboe get killed because of him; not again.

As he got up and began to stumble toward the opening of the alleyway, he began to see everything in front of him go hazy. A gunshot rang out and he shot his head up, panicking. He watched the wolf run across the street, unharmed. He sighed in relief, but now the men looking for the two boys weren't interested in the distraction of a rabid animal. _"Damnit!"_

Suddenly, he felt himself falling to the ground as he saw the three men turn the corner and see him. This was it. This was the end of the line. He would never see Toboe again. Everything up until now had simply been a cruel joke. He found himself quickly fading as the men approached him, looking down upon his deathly fainting body.

And then, everything went black.

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><p>Enjoying it yet? :) Please review if so! Until next time!<p> 


	10. Chapter 10

Hello! Yay, it's getting very good now. Finally, right? 3

**FYI:** If you prefer the "uncut" version, please check out adult fanfiction dot net or deviant art.

Caution: Further chapters will contain mature content such as language and yaoi, Tsume/Toboe. Be forewarned.

Disclaimer: I do not own the characters or series of Wolf's Rain. They belong to BONES & Keiko Nobumoto. This story is non-profit for my own and others' enjoyment. Thank you. :)

**Fall Into You**

A glaring light awakened the sleeping man who squinted his eyes as the fuzzy images above him began to take shape. The ceiling was a stark white, casting bright fluorescent lights over him. He caught the scent of antiseptics and bleach, which startled him. He sat up, immediately feeling an intense pain shoot through his left leg and into his nerves. Looking down at himself while grimacing, he saw that he wasn't dressed in the jeans, red tank and jacket that he'd worn that day, but in a hospital gown. A hospital gown?

He looked around, seeing that the room was empty aside from he and the two beds, one of which he occupied as well as the cabinets and extra chairs for sitting. The light was shining brightly through the slits of the dark curtain that hung on the window to his right. Wait, why was it so bright? Minutes ago it was just beginning to grow dark… Unless it was the next day. He frowned; _Shit._

He could hear the sounds of machines and people outside the cracked door of his room and he wondered what was going on. What had happened and how did he end up in this place? He then noticed running tubes attached to his arms, which flowed from two bags hanging next to him, one clear and the other red; it was blood.

"No!" He heard a muffled voice from outside the door, "Please let me see him!" it pleaded.

"I'm sorry," came a woman's voice, most likely a nurse. "But he's resting right now. Visitor hours will be later this afternoon."

"No, you don't understand! I have to see him! I waited all night!"

The man realized who it was, "Toboe!" he shouted.

"Tsume!" a startled voice replied, the door swinging open. The boy cam bursting in, tears in his eyes and threw himself next to the man's beside, crying into the warm sheets. The nurse followed behind him but let go of the matter when she saw the scene he was making. She placed a finger on her mouth, "Shhh," and glanced at the man, who nodded in reply.

Tsume placed his hand on the boy's head as he cried into the bed. "Stop it," he spoke softly, "I'm fine." He frowned when the boy didn't listen. After a few minutes he calmed down, but kept his head buried in the sheets. "I thought you were going to die." Toboe spoke in a hushed voice. "They wouldn't tell me what was going on; they wouldn't let me see you."

The boy looked up for a reaction, wiping his eyes with his sleeve. The man looked off to the cracks of sunlight coming in through the window, not wanting to meet his gaze. "Well, I'm alive now aren't I? So quit your whining, runt." He spoke harshly. His mind was beginning to recall the events from the day before. He remembered the fight and he could feel the wound in his leg and shoulders and how his bones ached. He remembered the chase and the younger boy that ran after him. And then he remembered the moment they had shared. He began to feel his face become flushed.

He closed his eyes, trying to forget it, but he couldn't. A hand was then placed over his own, "Tsume," spoke the boy. He yanked his hand away, biting his lip.

The boy frowned, "Do you know what happened?"

Tsume shot his head around and looked at Toboe; he didn't know. All he remembered was fainting from the loss of blood, now making sense that he was hooked up to fluids. "Tell me." He asked.

"You changed!" Toboe exclaimed, not waiting long to reply, "Just like me. You turned into a wolf. I don't think they even saw it though. They didn't know it was you so they left." He paused but then continued as he looked down at the rumpled sheets, still kneeling on the floor. "You wouldn't wake up though. I was scared. I went to find help, but I was still a wolf. I couldn't find anyone and by the time I got back, you had changed back. And they were carrying you away in the ambulance. It was just like before… " he bit his lip, "And I couldn't change back. So I followed you here. I waited and waited before I went back to normal. But then they wouldn't let me see you. You were really messed up." He began to cry again, "Tsume, I was so scared."

The boy grabbed onto the man's arm who did not pull away this time, but rather remained still as if he felt sorry for him. "Toboe." He spoke gently.

Toboe looked up at the man's face, not expecting what he saw. He was smiling, his face softened and kind. The boy bit his lip again and out came a soft cry when Tsume placed his hand against his warm, wet cheek. "I'm not going anywhere so stop your crying, all right?" He then roughly messed up the boy's hair with a smirk, "Besides, you're embarrassing me."

Toboe wiped away his tears once more, nodding with a smile.

…

It wasn't until the end of the day that Tsume was released from the hospital, reluctantly of course. But he had insisted on leaving, that he was perfectly fine to go. And so with much disagreement and hesitation, as well as insistence upon his part, the doctors agreed. Toboe was worried though.

"Do those guys know where I live?" he asked as they waited for a cab.

"No. So don't worry so much. We'll be fine for now." Tsume replied.

"Fine for now?" the boy couldn't help but worry.

"Yes, we're fine." The reply was very short, so Toboe decided not to ask again, even though he would be worried regardless of Tsume's assurance.

The cab ride was silent, as well as uncomfortable. The older one had made a clear distinction that he wished to be left alone and sat to one end of the backseat. The younger one frowned, wishing he could be closer to him and feel his touch. But now things were different and weird. Why was Tsume being so cold to him? He was afraid to say anything since he had asked about the men while they were waiting for their ride. But now, the silence was just as deadening and threatening as ever. He waited patiently until they were home and anxiously jumped out of the cab, longing for air.

He looked back at his older friend, who was paying for their ride. He looked down at the wounded leg and the bloodstains on the jeans from where the slash had been. But now, underneath the ripped part there was a white bandage covering the damage that had been done. He was carrying his jacket and the arm that had been wounded was also bandaged tightly. He frowned as the man turned around, catching his glimpse before he followed after him. The boy quickly turned away and began to fidget with the front door's lock as he came up behind him.

It was dark out now and he could barely see what he was doing, the streetlight just barely flickering above. He thought for sure that he had the key turned all the way in but it wouldn't budge. He groaned, trying to push it open. Just then, his companion grabbed the knob from him and pushed in the door with no trouble. He walked inside and the boy followed, biting his lip.

Tsume walked over to the sofa and threw his jacket over the back, slumping himself in next. He threw his arms up over his head with a grimace as this stretched his shoulder's wound, but quickly found himself able to relax, closing his eyes. Toboe closed the door behind him, the silence still thick between them.

"Tsume?" he muttered, afraid to speak at a regular tone. He didn't get an immediate reply and locked the door, frowning to himself. Why was he so afraid? What was wrong? Had he done something? He thought that everything was going so well. But now his friend would hardly even look at him.

"Tsume, please…" he walked up behind him, the man's back turned away from him. He wanted so badly to touch him, to be near him. "What did I do wrong?" he asked sheepishly, looking to the ground. "Are you mad at me?"

Tsume opened his eyes and glanced at the boy behind him. Toboe wouldn't meet his gaze and he wondered why. It wasn't that he was mad at the boy. It was just that everything that had happened was too much for him to think about. It was easier if he just ignored him. But it wasn't that easy, was it?

"Come here." The man sighed and patted the seat next to him.

The boy perked up and did as he was told. He sat next to the man, but still cautiously of course. He sat there for a while as Tsume once again closed his eyes, relaxing his aching bones. He didn't sit too close, allowing another space between them for the distance he knew the older wolf needed right now.

"Tsume?" The boy broke the silence after a few minutes.

"Hmm?" came the reply.

"I was wondering," he looked down, "Those guys, they were going to kill you, right?" The man didn't reply so he continued, "Well, do you want some money?"

Tsume's eyes opened and he looked at him, "Are you kidding?" he asked.

Toboe shook his head, not meeting his stare. "I have money from my Gran. She left it to me when she died."

"Your Gran?"

"My grandmother." He paused, "It doesn't matter how much. I can pay it!" He met him in the eyes, completely sincere.

Tsume began to understand why the kid had been so upset. Being in that old hospital probably reminded him of everything. He'd almost lost him too. It was probably overwhelming for the runt.

He frowned, "No, Toboe." He looked away.

"Why not? Tsume, they could kill you!" the boy pleaded with him, grabbing onto his arm.

Tsume snapped and pushed him back, "Then so be it! It's my damned responsibility, not yours! I got myself into it and I'll get myself out of it! That's it! SO LEAVE IT ALONE!" He stopped, his eyes widened, realizing that he'd scared him again, the boy shaking and cowering next to him.

He softened and sat back, "Look, maybe this isn't a good idea." He hated to admit it, but the words escaping his mouth pained him to say so.

"What do you mean?" Toboe replied, his breathing quickening.

"I mean that this whole thing is stupid." Oh no; he was doing it again. He had become used to hardening himself and giving up on others and here he was again. He knew he didn't need to be this way around Toboe, but he couldn't help it. It was who he was.

"What happened back there," He bit his lip, not wanting to look at the boy, "I didn't mean it. It was a mistake." He paused when there was no answer then continued, "This whole thing's a big mistake. Maybe it's best if we just forget about everything. If we just went back to the way it was before, we wouldn't be here. Our own separate lives were fine the way they were."

"Really? Do you really mean that?"

Tsume turned to look at the boy whose tears welled up in his eyes. He expected a reaction, but not one like this.

"How can you just forget everything? How was your life any better before?" Toboe yelled and stood up, the anger and tears fueling his insides, "Don't you remember everything that we went through together? Don't you remember, Tsume?"

Tsume froze as random memories of the boy once again flooded through his mind. He bit his lip, "Toboe," he muttered. He felt angry, but livened as the boy accused him of such things. It was an odd feeling boiling in his stomach.

"How can this whole thing be a mistake? I was so alone before I found you," Toboe was crying now, "Weren't you alone too? Why is it so hard for you to trust me and be near me?" He gripped his hands into fists, "Please, Tsume… Can't you see that I love you?"

That was it; the man couldn't hold back any longer.

The boy's eyes opened wide as he was startled by a soft kiss. He closed his eyes and melted into it slowly, feeling Tsume's firm arms wrapping around him and pulling him closer. His older companion pulled back gently, his golden eyes softened as he gazed into his hazel ones.

Toboe softly exhaled, gazing into the once vacant expression that now longed for him, "I've always loved you, Tsume." He spoke gently, kissing his companion once again as tears escaped him.

"Toboe," the older wolf breathed, letting himself go in the wave of desire that crashed upon them. He kissed the boy harder this time, the memories of yesterday returning to him. He recalled the runt's scent, his touch and the moans that escaped his lips. He remembered the feeling of the rain as it poured down upon them and the sounds of the city that disappeared as everything around them began to fade away.

And right now, all that mattered was this moment, just as it had before.

Tsume held onto the boy who was now on his lap, his legs positioned on each side of him. He found himself pressing in closer as each kiss grew more passionate than the last, his tongue escaping his mouth and into the other one. He dug his fingers into the soft auburn hair, just as the boy placed a hand onto the back of his head and leaned in closer. He pulled Toboe into him, one arm around his back and the other underneath him, supporting his weight.

Their lips did not part once, but grew in hunger as the younger one wrapped his arms around the older one, not wanting to let go, not wanting to lose this moment. Every time that he moaned, the man that held onto him became more excited and quickened his speed.

The moonlight shone through the window as Tsume lifted Toboe up with him as he stood, the boy's legs tightly wrapped around his middle. He ignored all bodily pain that presented itself as they continued to melt into each other, making their way past the sofa, past the hallway and to the bedroom. They stumbled, things were knocked over in their path, but all was ignored, all was put on hold and time itself froze still as they began to fall into each other.

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><p>Wowee! So beautiful, right? I love Tsume and Toboe… ::sigh:: Please review.. And remember to check out adult fanfiction dot net or deviant art to read the full version. The next and many upcoming chapters have adult content. Again, it's cut out of the original to keep it PG-13. :3 xoxo<p> 


	11. Chapter 11

Hello! Sorry it took me such a long time to get the next installment finished! :( There were many reasons holding me back, not to mention I've been sick. But please enjoy! The next chapter is already in the works, so stay tuned in the next couple of days. Getting good now. ;)

FYI: If you prefer the "uncut" version, please check out adult fanfiction dot net or deviant art.

Caution: Further chapters will contain mature content such as language and yaoi, Tsume/Toboe. Be forewarned.

Disclaimer: I do not own the characters or series of Wolf's Rain. They belong to BONES & Keiko Nobumoto. This story is non-profit for my own and others' enjoyment. Thank you. :)

**Wish You Were Here**

The moon was still out that night. It was the only light that shone through the slits of the curtain, casting shapes and shadows onto the bedroom wall. The two figures held each other close as they lay next to each, bodies still entwined beneath the comfort of warm blankets. The younger one traced his fingers along the man's chest, examining his birthmark with his fingers as the man held him next to him with one arm, the other arm resting behind his head.

"Tsume?"

"Hmmm?"

The boy paused a moment, continuing to touch the birthmark on Tsume's chest as he snuggled close to him. "You had this before, remember? It's weird that it never went away, even now."

Tsume frowned as he began to recall past events of his former pack where he had "earned" that scar. He didn't know why the kid was bringing it up because he'd explained it to him before, hadn't he?

No.

He hadn't. Not really.

It was after Toboe was killed, that he sat there with the lifeless body and let go of everything in his past. The boy had bothered him about it many times, but it was a painful memory that he was ashamed to tell. But it didn't matter any more. After the younger wolf had passed on, he felt it was useless to keep his secrets bottled up. He regretted so much. He regretted everything. It wasn't just the fact that he left his former pack to fend for themselves, but what had happened to the kid. He let him go. He let him die. It was all his fault.

"Tsume?" questioned a soft voice.

Tsume glanced down at the boy's face, who had propped himself up to look at him. He appeared concerned. "I'm sorry, Toboe." He pulled him into an embrace, burrowing his head into crook of the boy's neck where he had planted the bite-mark on his new mate during the past heated moments.

Toboe tensed at first, as his shoulder blade was still tender, but leaned into the man's hug. His lover held him tightly, as if he was afraid to let go of him. The boy frowned, sensing the pain in the man's grip. "Tsume," he held him closer, his arms around him. He kissed the soft silver hair, which slightly tickled his nose. "Please," he spoke again, softly, "What's wrong Tsume?"

He thought the man might begin to cry, and even though he wouldn't mind seeing that display of emotions from his usually cold character, it would also pain him to see Tsume like that. There was no answer for a long while. Toboe had decided not to press him with any further questions, but remained silent and held him close.

He soon felt his lover pull away from him, cold and hardened. The boy watched as the man quickly glanced at him, his expression now angry as he turned around to lay on his other side, not facing him. "Just leave me be and get some sleep." He muttered into the pillow.

Toboe frowned and sat up, gathering the blanket to his cold bare body. He bit his lip, deciding not to keep his silent tone any longer. "Stop it!"

Tsume lay on his side, looking at the wall as the boy yelled at him.

"You can't keep doing this!" Toboe could feel tears in his eyes as he clenched his fists. He looked down at his lap once more, beginning to calm himself from the frustration. "Every time I get closer to you, you just pull away. I know that you don't want that. I know that you want to be with me, Tsume. Even now, after everything…" he blushed, remembering the night's events. "Please, Tsume… Please don't shut me out," he sobbed, bringing his hands up to his face to stop his tears.

In a moment's notice he felt strong hands on his wrists, lowering his arms from his face. He gazed up at the softened golden eyes looking down at his sobbing face. Toboe cried again, falling into his lover's arms.

Tsume's arms held the boy to him as rested his head on his, his legs also spread out around him, embracing the shaking body. As frustrating as it was sometimes, he still needed to be reminded that he did care about him. He meant the world to him; he just couldn't say that so much in words.

Toboe rested his head on the man's chest, his cheek rubbing against the smoothness of the scar. As he began to calm down, he decided to speak up once more, "Tsume… You know I don't care. I want you to know that you can tell me anything. I don't even care if you did something horrible," he bit his lip, "I just want you to feel safe around me, the way I feel when I'm with you…"

The boy felt the man's hug tighten and he realized he truly did feel safe. He didn't need an answer. One day Tsume would realize this and he would talk to him, about everything.

"It's just that…"

Toboe leaned back, surprised that the man holding him had decided to say something. He rested in his arms as he looked up at the man's face who avoided his gaze as he continued, "It's hard for me… to keep remembering everything that we went through," He grimaced, "I can't think about it. So please stop bringing it up."

"Tsume," the boy whispered, trying to understand what his friend was going through.

Tsume wouldn't look at him. It was hard for him to remember their past lives; but it was even harder for him to talk about it. He would rather just bury it deep inside, as he had everything else. But the boy he held in his arms needed more than that. And deep down, he knew that he needed it too. He then felt a hand upon his face and looked down at the boy whose hand it was. He was smiling up at him lovingly.

Tsume felt his face soften when he looked into those hazel eyes. This boy didn't judge him at all, did he? He really didn't care. Why not? It wasn't right.

"It's all right, Tsume. You don't have to say anything." Toboe nudged his head up under the man's chin, his arms now around his neck. "Just stay with me here. Like this, for always." He pulled back and kissed him on the lips softly, not gaining a reply. He pulled back, looking his lover in the eyes.

The golden eyes in front of him softened again as he felt himself being pulled back down to the sheets, holding onto the strong body above him. He gripped onto Tsume's strong shoulders as he felt his lips on his neck, kissing the scar he'd left on him. "Ah, Tsume…" he breathed.

Toboe gazed out the window, focusing on the moon still glowing brightly as the two lovers began to lose themselves once again.

…

"This is terrible!" the boy exclaimed, his tone frustrated and angry.

"Just deal with it," the man next to him shrugged as he threw the boy's pants at his head, he himself almost completely dressed after he'd finished showering.

The boy didn't catch the clothes that were tossed in his face, letting them land on him, rumpling over his head. He looked up at the man a few feet away from him. He could see more in the morning light now than he could the night before. He noticed how tanned his skin was and the way his muscles stretched as he dressed himself. The boy began to blush as he remembered the feeling of those muscles against his body.

And they had even gone again a second time. _"But Tsume,"_ he remembered everything so clearly. _"I'm still kind of…"_

"_It's all right. You just rest and let me…" _

He found himself burrowing his face into the sheets again, recalling everything Tsume had made him feel. All he'd done was just lay there, gripping the bed as his lover kissed him everywhere, _everywhere_. It was almost like he was slowly tasting every part of his body, inch by inch, curve by curve. It was torturous at first, but exciting.

He remembered the burning in his belly, longing for the man to be inside of him again, even though he was still sore. But Tsume never even attempted that. He didn't need to; he was already so talented. Toboe felt that burning once again, his loins beginning to tighten as the feeling of the man's mouth on him was brought back to his memories. It was so slow the second time, so soft, wet and delicate… It was excruciating, but it was wonderful. "Ah," he felt himself begin to moan again, his fingers beginning to wander.

"Did you forget?" came the man's voice.

The boy snapped out of his daydream, seeing that Tsume was now fully dressed and standing over him. He gathered the sheets around him, embarrassed that he would be found out about his current mishap.

"C'mon! You gotta work!" The man yelled and grabbed the sheets around him.

"No!" was all he could scream before the sheets were pulled off his naked body. He gathered around himself, blushing furiously and closing his eyes, desperately trying to cover himself.

He his eyes again when Tsume began roaring with laughter.

This made him angry, "Stop laughing at me! Leave me alone!" he yelled at him. He felt like he was going to die.

"Aw, calm it down, runt." The man said after he relaxed, "You're young; you'll learn."

Toboe was about to say something else, as the reply made him even angrier, but he was stopped when the man continued, "Just go take a shower and get ready." He placed a hand on the boy's head, ruffling his auburn hair slightly, "I'll even give you a ride. How's that sound?"

The boy smiled and nodded, climbing out of bed and running to the bathroom to avoid the cold morning air.

Tsume blushed a little as he watched the younger one's bare bottom go past him. He shook his head, not wanting to create a problem of his own.

…

The sound of a motorcycle revving up filled the streets as the boy stood at the apartment door, locking it behind him. He turned to see the silver haired man sitting on his bike with an arm stretched out to him, his helmet in hand. "Here," he spoke to him.

He took the helmet slowly and looked at it then back to his companion. "But Tsume, you didn't have me wear it before?" He was confused, "Why now?"

Tsume rolled his eyes, "Look kid, take it however you want. Ok?" He puffed, "Now get on."

The boy nodded and pulled the helmet over his head, beginning to struggle with the chinstrap when he felt another set of hands assist him. He glanced and smiled, seeing that Tsume was also smiling, probably in amusement at how inexperienced he was with this sort of thing. "There, now c'mon, Toboe." the man commanded after he was finished.

Toboe happily climbed up behind him, wrapping his arms around his waist. As soon as the bike took off he became lost in his thoughts. This wasn't the same as before, was it? He remembered when he had given him a ride home that night. It seemed so long ago now. The man next to him didn't even want him touching him and now… everything was different.

He leaned in closer, resting his head on Tsume's strong lean back, smiling to himself.

"Don't be too sad!" He heard the man yell back at him over the loud sound of the engine as they drove along. "I have to work today too! So we wouldn't have had time together anyways!"

If Tsume were being honest with himself, he didn't want to leave the younger wolf's side. It wasn't that he was afraid to be away from him for safety's sake. He had just grown used to being near him and what would it be like now that he would be separated from him? But it was only for a short while and soon enough they would be together again.

What was he thinking? He sounded like a goddamned pansy thinking like that. The boy would be fine, right? Besides, he still had bills to pay and debt. Debt… That's right. He still had that lingering problem, didn't he? What was he going to do about that?

He knew they didn't know where the kid lived. But what if they had followed them somehow? But if that were the case, wouldn't they have seen them by now? How many days had it been? Two or three?

"Tsume!" a voice yelled, interrupting him.

"What?"

"Turn right up here!"

Tsume nodded, making a quick turn at the corner. Two blocks down the boy yelled once more, "Just right here, ok?"

The bike was pulled over to the curb, slowing to a stop. The boy slowly climbed down and undid the straps on the helmet, pulling it off. He smoothed his hand over his head as his hair was messy underneath. Handing the helmet back to his companion, he smiled and leaned in to the man's face, closing his eyes.

"Not here, Toboe." came a muttered response.

The boy opened his eyes and blushed, seeing that Tsume was avoiding his eyes. "Oh…" he spoke, embarrassed. Why did he do that? He should have known that Tsume wasn't the type to show affection in public. It was even unlikely when they were alone. He felt so stupid.

"So this isn't your work, is it?"

"What?" Toboe looked behind him then back to Tsume, "No, I wanted to get something for Mr. Jon."

Tsume looked up and down the street, leaving the boy to wonder why he was doing so. He appeared to be kind of anxious. "So do you need a ride home? What time do you get off?" he asked the boy.

"Oh! Ummm, I think around six or so. Today is a full day." Toboe smiled, stretching one arm behind his head.

"All right. I'll see you then." The man placed his helmet on his head, fastened the straps and began to take off before the boy spoke once more.

"Tsume?"

He looked at the boy who avoided his gaze, looking at his feet. "Yes, Toboe?" he asked.

"Thank you for the ride, for everything." He looked at him then, smiling. "I can't wait until six."

Tsume didn't say anything but nodded with a vacant expression, revved up his motorcycle and sped off into the traffic. The boy's eyes followed him until he was out of sight. It was kind of like before, wasn't it? Some things never changed all that much.

…

Only four more blocks to go; he was almost there. He looked down at his recent purchase in his arms: a bag of cat food and a couple of toys for Mr. Jon's new little bundle of joy. He smiled to himself, imagining how happy his boss would be at his gesture of kindness.

He turned the corner but was caught off guard when he felt an odd surge of energy jolt through him. Slowing his speed, he began to glance around him wondering what had brought that on. His pulse began to quicken and he felt as if he might freeze to death. He was being watched, wasn't he?

But it wasn't like before when Tsume had found him at the farmer's market. It was a bad feeling.

He gripped onto the items in his arms. Not much farther to the bookstore now. Then he would be safe. Wouldn't he?

He stopped in his tracks, seeing if anything would change. No.

Slowly turning around, he saw blurred visions of people passing him, each on their own way. But then he saw him, standing there, amidst the crowd of bustling bodies. He froze.

It was one of them. They'd found him.

No! Were they all here? Or just the one guy? Was he following him?

He ran.

He didn't think about it; he just ran for the only thing he knew right now, the bookstore.

The boy breathed heavily as he clutched the cat food and bag of toys to his body, hurriedly pushing past the civilians that were in his pathway. He could feel the man's presence behind him, also running, catching up to him. One more block! Almost there!

He felt like he was going fall over and lose it, be caught and then it would be the end. It was worse than before when they were running away from them together.

"_Tsume!"_ His mind shouted, over and over. _"Tsume!"_

He glanced up, seeing the familiar painted gold words on the window incased in the green wooden frame. There! He made it! He was ok!

He grabbed the door to the shop, swerving himself inside and slamming it behind him. He pulled the curtain down and locked the door as the bell jingled, banging repeatedly against the glass. He gasped for air, feeling the tears coming from his eyes. His body slunk down to the floor, dropping the purchased items as his side.

"Toboe? My goodness, what's wrong?" the old man's voice sounded from behind the counter.

The boy didn't look his way, but pulled the curtain back with two fingers, watching cautiously from behind the glass door. "N-nothing, why?"

"Well," the man frowned, "You look like you've seen a ghost."

"I-I… I don't know. I guess I," Toboe was speechless. "I guess so."

The older man came up behind him and placed a hand on the shaking boy's shoulder. "Now, my son. You're all right. What happened?"

Toboe leaned back on the floor as he watched Mr. Jon pull the curtain back up and unlock the door. He felt like he should stop him, but then there would come more explanation, more drama. And really, what was the use now? He was fine. They were gone.

"I-I just thought I saw someone I knew." He paused, looking at the old red carpet on the floor. "I was wrong. I'm fine now." He regrettably lied to the kind man, but knew it was for the best. He glanced outside the glass door, watching people pass along the sidewalk like everything was right in the world.

He sighed, thinking to himself, _"I wish Tsume were here."_

* * *

><p>Exciting, right? Reviews please! :3<p> 


	12. Chapter 12

Hello! Here we are again for the 13th installment. Can you believe it's come this far? Thanks to all of those that have reviewed. It helps! ;) Enjoy!

FYI: If you prefer the "uncut" version, please check out adult fanfiction dot net or deviant art.

Caution: Further chapters will contain mature content such as language and yaoi, Tsume/Toboe. Be forewarned.

Disclaimer: I do not own the characters or series of Wolf's Rain. They belong to BONES & Keiko Nobumoto. This story is non-profit for my own and others' enjoyment. Thank you. :)

**Blazing Glory**

The sun was already beginning to set, the golden colors in the sky reflecting on the city's buildings of glass and steel. The sound of a motorcycle echoed through the streets along with other vehicles that passed by. He waited patiently, lost in his thoughts.

He sighed. It was getting warmer now. He didn't even need a jacket really. He preferred the cold, unlike the rest of the world. It was comforting to him; it made him feel alive while everything around him died, like the flowers with winter's first snow.

Sometimes he felt like the winter's frost, everything he touched withering at his hand.

"Tsume!" an excited voice interrupted him.

Tsume's frown turned into a smile as he saw the boy running out to him. He could eat that innocence up with a spoon; the boy was so thick in it. He admired that about the kid, but at the same time he envied him. The two of them, even now, had experienced such different lives. And this life hadn't been any kinder to him than the last. Was this supposed to be paradise?

Paradise?

That's right.

So what ever became of that?

"Did you have an easy day?" Tsume asked as Toboe took the helmet from him and began to fit it onto his head. The boy seemed like he was in a hurry as he scrambled with the fastenings and quickly leapt behind him on the bike. He looked up when the door's bell chimed again, the old man stepping out after him.

"Toboe, wait!" He ran out to them just as Toboe placed his arms around Tsume's waist.

"I wanted to give you something for the trouble," he handed a few bills out to Toboe who shook his head.

"No, I can't! It was a gift." Toboe smiled, holding his hand up. "Please."

"Well, all right." Mr. Jon said reluctantly, his eyes then following to the older man next to him. He frowned.

"Oh! This is my friend, Tsume!" Toboe quickly introduced them when he saw the older man's expression, "Tsume, this is Mr. Jon!" He could feel Tsume tense up when he didn't hear him say anything. Toboe frowned now as well, loosening his grip on his companion.

Mr. Jon nodded hesitantly, "Toboe, how is everything at home?" He looked concerned as his eyes darted back and forth from the boy to the man on the bike.

Toboe was confused, "It's fine, why-"

"We gotta go!" Tsume chimed in angrily, revving up the bike and taking off.

Toboe yelped, tightening his grip as he watched Mr. Jon wave after them. He turned around, looking up to the back of Tsume's head. He could tell something wasn't right but he decided to say something any way. "Tsume! Why did you take off like that? We were talking!"

"What the hell does he know?" Tsume spat back, "Looking at me like I'm some kind of pervert!" He began to drive the bike faster and harder, scaring the boy slightly.

"What? No!" Toboe disagreed with him, "He's nice, really!"

Tsume didn't reply. The boy looked down as he held on, watching the white marks on the street flash by. He had felt so happy when he first saw Tsume pull up a few minutes ago, but now he felt sad, embarrassed and even a little ashamed. Mr. Jon had looked at his friend suspiciously, hadn't he? Was he worried about him? Why? Was this wrong, this relationship he was now a part of?

"_I don't understand… I love him." _He thought, closing his eyes as he waited for the ride home to be over.

…

Tsume collapsed on top of the boy's fragile, shaking body. The boy could feel himself being smothered and gasped for air, gripping onto Tsume's back. His body felt so numb and the man on top of him didn't move as he buried his head into his neck. Toboe hugged him, nuzzling against his cheek.

"I love you, Tsume…" he breathed. He sincerely meant it. Right now, this man next to him was the only thing that mattered.

Tsume pulled his head back and gently kissed him. He propped himself up on one arm, gazing down into the boy's eyes. The boy began to blush again and Tsume smirked. It would never get old, would it? But that's one of the many things he liked about him.

"Tsume?" The boy's voice was weak, his forehead sweaty and hair a mess.

"Toboe?" the man nodded.

Toboe bit his lip, "How come you don't ever say it?" He looked into his golden eyes, repeating the question in his head. So many times now, so many times he had told him that he loved him. But Tsume never said anything about his feelings. It's not that he expected him to. Tsume wasn't the type to express himself. But there should have been some sort of display of his feelings, right?

"Say what?" Tsume grunted; he knew what the kid was getting at.

"I love you!" Toboe replied, hurt by the man's cold demeanor.

Tsume sat up, rolling his eyes. Zipping his pants up, he leaned back against the sofa. "Seriously?" He really didn't want to go there. He watched the boy, naked and troubled as he too sat up, waiting for a response.

Tsume shrugged, "It's obvious, isn't it?" He laughed a little, poking the boy in his lower region.

"I'm serious!" Toboe yelled, blushing at his touch. He looked down at the floor, avoiding the man's gaze. He then felt a clothing article tossed into his lap. He noticed that it was Tsume's t-shirt. Toboe looked up. He'd taken it off and was now bare from the pants up. He could see the cut on his shoulder from days long ago where he was shot at. His mind then recalled the men that were looking for them. He still hadn't said anything to Tsume about it. That was two days ago.

"Tsume?" the boy asked again, staying on the current topic.

"What?" the man regrettably replied, watching the boy as he pulled the t-shirt over his naked body.

"Have you ever been in love before?" Toboe looked up at him, his eyes searching for an answer.

Tsume shot his glance elsewhere. He was persistent, wasn't he? Why did everything have to be spelled out for the kid? All he did was push him for answers. It was because the runt knew him very well, didn't he? He knew that if he poked him hard enough, he would give in. He usually did every time.

It had always been that way. And even now, he felt his heart softening. He was going to have to let him in eventually, wasn't he? In fact, he already did. He just didn't realize it. The moment the younger wolf left his life the first time, all walls came crashing down. He would never be the same.

And even now with all of those memories recalled, he just couldn't find the words to express what he really wanted to say.

Tsume looked around, finding an extra shirt on the sofa to slip on. Why did he have to talk about this? Toboe was so demanding and he knew that he would not let up, so why fight it?

"Yes," he finally answered after much deliberation.

"Oh," Toboe was a little disappointed, but curious. "Do you… want to tell me about it?" He longed for a deep conversation with the man in front of him. He was such a secret to him. Even before, he never really knew all of him. And he wanted that to change now that they had a new lease on life together.

Tsume sighed, "There was someone. But she's gone now." He looked away, not wanting to see the boy's face.

The boy frowned, "A girl?" His mind began to race with questions.

"Yes, a woman." Tsume continued. "It was a few years back… I was a boy when I met her."

Everything was white, covered in a thick layer of snow. It still fell from the sky, clouding the vision of the streets, lamps and the boy. The even was fast approaching as the young boy walked along the sidewalk, his shoes soaking in the wetness of the snow. He looked back at his footprints, wondering how far he had walked and how much farther he still had to go.

He brushed his gloved fingers past the wired fence next to him, listening to the sound of the gate echoing at his touch.

"Hello!" He looked up to see a girl's face on the other side of the fence. He shot his glance elsewhere, trying to ignore her. Not now. What was this?

"Where are you going?" She walked along side him on the opposite side of the fence. There was no answer. "Hello, are you even listening to me?"

"What?" the boy stopped in his tracks, yelling at her.

She also stopped, but then began laughing at him. He watched her bend over, grabbing her belly as she laughed. He didn't get the joke. He rolled his eyes.

"I noticed you get off that bus a while back there." She spoke again, straightening herself. "Are you going to the Aunt Lynn's Home?"

He didn't say anything, but nodded in reply.

"Well, me too. I just ran an errand." She smiled, holding up a small bag of groceries. "Why don't you walk with me, ummm?"

"Ts-tsume." The boy's voice shivered. Jeeze, it was cold.

"I'm Danielle." Her face smiled.

"She was different from the rest of them." Tsume spoke, staring off distantly. Toboe just continued to listen to his story.

The sun was shining brightly outside that day. It was warm, the grass green and the bird singing. He heard a laugh sounding next to him. He looked over at the girl as they sat together atop the hill overlooking the city. She was enjoying the company of a butterfly on her finger. He smiled, watching her.

How long had it been since the day that they'd met? He wasn't sure. They were older now, no longer young children but still adolescents in the world's eyes; teenagers on the brink of adulthood. He'd grown so close to her in what seemed like such a long time. She was so carefree and innocent, unlike the world she was in. Unlike him.

"Tsume," she smiled, glancing his way. "Promise me something, ok?"

"What's that?" he asked, moving closer to her.

"Stay with me here. Just like this, for always." Her face grew serious as she gazed into his golden eyes, her blue eyes sparkling with tears.

The boy couldn't help himself. He leaned in, kissing her as she too returned his gesture.

Toboe had stopped looking at him now, his eyes wandering to the pattern of the red carpet on the wooden floor beneath him. He wasn't sure what was the appropriate feeling for him to have right now. Should he have asked in the first place? He wanted to know this man in front of him. He really did. He'd told him so, _"even the bad",_ he'd said. But now he wasn't sure.

Tsume continued, "We grew up together… in that home for unwanted kids. She had a brother too. He was all right. Didn't like me though. Sometimes we would disappear for a little while. He would get so pissed…" He laughed a little, recalling his memories.

Toboe knew what he meant. _"It was my first time, being with Tsume... But it wasn't his, was it?"_ he thought, blushing and feeling a little disappointed.

"But nothing lasts forever. Everything ends." Tsume frowned.

"Tsume, I don't know what to do! I'm so scared!" the woman cried, clutching onto him with desperation. The man held onto her shaking body, trying to comfort her. "They're going to kill him! If I don't get them their money they'll kill him!"

"Shhh, just tell me. What happened?" he asked the sobbing woman in his arms.

"It's Keith… he borrowed money and now… It's too late! Tsume, please! He'll die!"

Toboe looked at Tsume now, realizing the seriousness of the situation. Was that why everything around them was going on?

"I really loved her…" he spoke softly.

Toboe found himself growing sad.

"I swore to her that I would do everything, that I would take care of it." Tsume sighed, gathering his knee up against his chin and resting on it. He frowned, gritting his teeth, "And I did. I signed my life over to help her."

Tsume then bit his lip, finding it hard to continue. He threw his head back, gazing at the ceiling. The room had grown so dark now. "I did everything I could. But in the end… she died."

"Tsume…" Toboe whispered. He wanted to hug him, to be near him. But he knew he couldn't do that. Right now he had a chance, a chance to hear him out. He was finally opening up to him and if he tried anything, he might lose that moment. He sat patiently, loving the older wolf from afar.

"He said it was a car accident." He looked down to his right leg, still avoiding the boy's gaze. "He said the body was too fucked up… I couldn't even say goodbye…"

He was silent for a moment before he continued, "…That's why I owe them money. That's why they're after us." He looked off distantly, still absorbed in his thoughts.

"But what about her brother? Why couldn't he pay them? That's not fair!" Toboe insisted.

"Nah, he was off the hook." Tsume grunted, "He disappeared. Besides, I was the one who made the agreement."

There was a thickening silence in the room. It had grown so dark now that the boy could hardly even see him, aside from those glowing golden eyes. This was too serious for him to handle. Had he lied to Tsume by not telling him what had happened the other day? He was hoping that they could just forget everything and live their lives the way that they were. But they couldn't do that, could they?

"Tsume, they found me." Toboe blurted out.

The man finally turned to face him, eyes glaring, "What?"

The boy gulped at Tsume's cold reaction, afraid to go any further. But he did, "They followed me to my work. They know where I work! But I only saw one of the guys. And it was only once. It will be ok now. It's no big deal. They don't know where we are!" he paused, "But I know! We can go! We'll leave and get out of town! Tsume, please! Let's just go!" he cried out as he latched onto the man's arm in desperation.

"WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?"

There it was. He half expected to get smacked across the face and looked away, defensively putting an arm in front of his face for protection. Tsume did not hit him, but he did accidentally knock the boy over when he stood up suddenly, bumping into the table. It was pushed against Toboe, knocking him against a chair that slid away from him.

He yelped as he hit his elbow on the hard wooden floor. But then he noticed something.

The book! It had been under the chair! He'd completely forgotten until now, "Tsume! Look!" He turned to face him, holding the book in his hand.

The sound of a door was slammed shut. He was gone.

"No! Tsume!" Toboe bolted up from the floor, the t-shirt just barely resting at his thighs as he ran after him. He swung open the door, turning to the right as he saw Tsume walking down the sidewalk.

He was getting ready to yell again when Tsume hollered back at him, "I'm going to get us dinner... Stay here. I just need some air." He hadn't turned to look at him, but just kept walking. Toboe sighed, looking down at the sidewalk. He then realized that he was only wearing a t-shirt and jumped back inside, cautiously looking back and forth to see if anyone had spotted him. No. He was all right.

He walked back into the house, noticing the old book on the floor. He walked over to it and picked it up, sighing again. "It's not fair." He didn't know what she looked like, but he could imagine her. Tsume said that he loved her… Was he jealous?

She was dead, for God's sake! What was wrong with him?

Why couldn't Tsume love him the way he loved him? He'd given him so much. He gave him food, a home, even himself with all of his love… It hurt him so much, filling him with mixed emotions of love, sorrow, jealousy and anger. Why?

He looked out the window, seeing his lover's figure a ways down on the moonlit sidewalk. He bit his lip in anger, tears filling his eyes. He began to cry, "It's not fair… I hate you, Tsume…"

…

It was the next morning when he was taking the boy to work that he began to recall everything. He couldn't believe all that had come out of his mouth the night before. He'd done it. Well, enough of it. He'd opened up to the kid. But what good did it do?

When he arrived back home, a bag of burgers in hand, he was surprised to experience what he had. He had managed to calm himself down after his long walk. But the pup acted like he was the bad guy and hardly said a word to him. How ungrateful could he be?

He just bore a big part of his soul to the kid and for what?

At first he was fine with the silent treatment the boy was giving him. But after a while it had begun to get on his nerves. He remembered watching Toboe slowly eat the burger he'd brought home for him. He remembered trying to strike up conversation but without much response. He felt bad for yelling at him.

He knew he must've been afraid to say anything. It was his fault those guys were now involved in the runt's life anyways.

He was trying. He was trying really hard.

He knew the stupid kid needed confirmation for everything. And he was trying to do that. But all he got from him was a thank you and a good night as he closed the bedroom door behind him, leaving him to sleep on the couch.

He didn't get it. What was wrong with him?

Shouldn't he be the one who was mad? Stupid kid. He was so young.

"Tsume! What's that?" the boy yelled.

Tsume looked up as the boy held onto him, driving through the streets. He saw black smoke rising into the air a few blocks ahead. He sped up, swerving through lanes and vehicles to get there faster. Toboe held onto him tightly, looking anxiously ahead. It couldn't be, could it?

Tsume could hear the sirens going off, sounding like they were coming from every direction as they echoed loudly. He pulled his bike up to their destination, seeing what he had feared. As soon as he stopped the boy holding onto him leapt off, throwing the helmet from his head and onto the sidewalk as he stood frozen in fear.

He felt himself release all of the anger that filled him, reaching out to his companion.

"NO!" Toboe screamed, tears falling from his eyes, "THEY DID! THEY DID IT!" He swung around and fell into Tsume's arms. The older man held onto him as the boy buried his head into his chest. "THEY KILLED MR. JON!" he wailed, pulling at the man's jacket and pounding his fist against him.

Tsume held his position, his face angry and hardened as he clutched onto his lover's shaking, sobbing body. He listened to the people running around them, crowds gathering to see what was going on. Policemen held everyone back as fire fighters tried to settle the horrific disaster.

He pulled Toboe closer into his chest, watching the scene of bright red embers twisting, fire crackling against the golden painted windowpanes and broken green wood of the building as the smoke rose to the sky in all of its blazing glory.

* * *

><p>All right, kind of dark I know. But be prepared because it will get even darker in the next chapter. Not for the light of heart… :( Brace yourselves!<p>

Soooo… what are your thoughts? :)


	13. Chapter 13

Hello! I am soooooooooo sorry for the delay on this chapter. Between mid terms, work and Mass Effect 3(woo!), I've been pretty occupied. ^^() So I made this chapter extra long to make up for that fact. :D

Also, please check out my deviant art page. You can search "Our Beginning" and you will find me. I've got some fanart in the works so please check it out if you'd like. :)

I would also like to list a playlist I've created for this fanfic. These songs speak everything about Tsume and Toboe's relationship- the good, the bad and the ugly. I do hope you'll check the music out. You'll really get my drift of where I'm going with the story. A few are covers or the original, unknown versions of songs. You'll want the ones listed because they fit the feel of the story the best. Also, fyi they are listed in proper order to fit the story's pace.

Music is an amazing, inspiring thing! It's a nice eclectic mix, much like the Wolf's Rain soundtracks. :)

1. The Scientist (Coldplay)

2. I Remember (Damien Rice)

3. Breathe Me (Sia)

4. Lost (Anouk)

5. Creep (Brandi Carlile)

6. When Your Minds Made Up (Glen Hansard & Marketa Irglova)

7. Iris (Goo Goo Dolls)

8. If You Want Me (Glen Hansard & Marketa Irglova)

9. Hallelujah (Brandi Carlile)

10. Nothing Else Matters (Lissie)

11. Fast Car (Tracy Chapman)

12. Love the Way You Lie (Skylar Grey)

13. 9 Crimes (Damien Rice)

14. Vindicated (Dashboard Confessional)

15. Rise (The Frames)

16. I Will Follow You into the Dark (Death Cab for Cutie)

17. Heartbeats (Jose Gonzalez)

FYI: If you prefer the "uncut" version, please check out adult fanfiction dot net or deviant art.

Caution: Further chapters will contain mature content such as language and yaoi, Tsume/Toboe. Be forewarned.

Disclaimer: I do not own the characters or series of Wolf's Rain. They belong to BONES & Keiko Nobumoto. This story is non-profit for my own and others' enjoyment. Thank you. :)

**Eyes Wide**

The fire went on for what seemed like hours, water blasting from the giant hose aimed by three firefighters, police setting up barricades as they cleared away the curious civilians. The buildings on each side that had originally been attached to the bookstore had now also taken the damage, their old frames going up in smoke.

"Why? Why, why? …" the man listened as he held onto the sobbing boy in his arms. Every time the kid spoke it irked something inside of him. It made his blood boil.

"Hey!" he shouted to a police officer who immediately took notice.

"Sir, please stay back! We're doing everything we can to keep it under control!" he replied, holding up his arms not only to him, but others that were becoming anxious.

The silver haired man gritted his teeth, clutching onto his companion whose face was buried in his chest. "What about the old man? He owned that place! Who started the fire? Was he killed?" He could feel the boy tensing against him with each word.

The crowd around them began muttering, whispering and talking amongst themselves about the events that had and were taking place. "Did you hear that? Someone was killed!" one person exclaimed. "Oh my god, what happened?" another wailed.

The officer looked shocked but his facial expression soon turned to one of frustration and anger, "Sir, please! We have no information at this time. We are just trying to get everything under control at this point." The moment he finished that sentence a loud blast came from the fire, sending rubble and flames flying as a few people screamed, jumping back in surprise.

The officer growled and turned in that direction, "MOVE EVERYONE BACK!" He turned to take control of the situation as other officers stepped in, pushing the barricades farther back, trying to clear the crowd of civilians out of the way.

The man knew it was no use. They couldn't stay here and watch this. It was pointless.

"Toboe," he spoke roughly, "Let's go."

The sobbing boy did not resist at all as he was led away, his companion's strong arm wrapped around his shoulder. He hugged onto the man's waist, nuzzling his head against him. He felt another hand on his head pressing him into the warm body for comfort. He found himself becoming more relaxed, feeling safe in these arms even though he was in so much pain, lost in his memories and the sorrow of the morning's events.

…

"Tsume," he spoke hesitantly. It had been several hours and he was becoming worried of the silence in the room. A reply did not come as the boy continued washing the dishes in the sink. He looked into the soapy waters, remembering what had happened and what was going on all around them. As he gazed longer into the water, he felt his own eyes becoming wet.

"Tsume!" he turned, tears in his eyes as he expected to still see him on the sofa. But he was not there. He was standing right in front of him. The boy stopped, stepping back against the kitchen counter. "Ts-tsume…" he muttered surprisingly. He didn't know what to expect.

"Are you still hungry?" Tsume asked, leaning against the table behind him. "We could… go get some ice cream?" He was trying to appease the boy's troubled mind. "Or maybe some shopping? I would buy you something. How's that sound?" he suggested.

Tsume watched the boy's face turn downward, looking at the floor as his delicate fingers gripped the counter top. There was no reply. The man could feel himself become frustrated, angry because, one, he hated going out, and two, because he was really trying and the kid wasn't biting. He wanted him to stop worrying. He wanted him to be happy. He hated seeing him like this.

"Toboe, there's no use in ignoring me. You can talk." Tsume sighed, "How about-"

"Tsume, how can you want to do something fun?" Toboe spoke up, "Mr. Jon is dead!"

"You don't know that!" he spat back, gritting his teeth. He didn't want to do anything. If they did, it was only for the stupid kid. He was so damn thick headed. "Seriously, Toboe. There's no point in sitting around and wasting away in your grief. Get off your ass and do something. The guy was old as hell anyways."

SHIT.

Tsume bit his lip, realizing what he'd just said was extremely harsh. He watched Toboe's face, expecting him to become infuriated or in the very least, to start crying again. But the boy didn't do either of these actions. He looked shocked at first, but his expression soon let go, becoming saddened. He watched as the kid frowned and turned back to the sink, finishing his chores.

Tsume frowned also, regretting his cold words and demeanor. That was all the kid needed. He instinctively reached out to him, wanting to apologize, "Toboe, I'm sor-"

"Can we go? Please?"

The man was interrupted and stopped, watching as the boy turned back around to face him, holding a plate and towel in his hands.

"Let's just go! Let's get out of town. Please, Tsume." His eyes were teary, his voice pleading.

Tsume shot his glance elsewhere, feeling himself becoming softened at the boy's expression. He bit his lip again, "Toboe, we can't just go."

"Why not?" he cried.

Tsume growled at the outburst, turning back to face him. "What, are you stupid? They'll come after us!"

Toboe jumped at the reply, accidentally dropping the porcelain plate, which shattered on the floor. He didn't care. He could feel himself becoming angrier and angrier. "Why does it matter?" he shouted, "What's the point? Even if we stay here they'll still find us! Tsume, please!"

There was no reply, just Tsume's glowing eyes and frustrated expression glaring back at him. Toboe felt threatened and was afraid to go on, but he did anyways, "It's not like we don't have a choice…" he looked down at his feet, chips from the broken plate lying next to them on the kitchen floor. "Remember? I have money," he muttered.

There was still no answer. He shot his head up, "We can do it! We can leave! Gran left me everything when she died!" Toboe stopped and looked back down. He had mentioned her only once to Tsume, but things were different back then. Maybe he wouldn't be as cold now?

"I told you before… She died… before I met you." His voice grew softer, "We lived here… this was her house. She was my grandmother. She raised me. But… " It was hard for him to talk about it. He could feel his voice tightening with each word, "…she's gone now."

Tsume sighed as he watched the boy wipe the freshly fallen tears from his eyes. He didn't know what to say. He wasn't the sympathizing type. But he couldn't just say nothing at all. "Look, I'm sorry about your grandmother," he bit his lip and continued, "But I can't just take your money. I'll figure something else out."

Toboe frowned. He was growing so tired of this man's attitude, not just with this situation, but with everything!

"Tsume, stop being so stubborn!" he yelled at him, "You still won't let me in! You still won't let me help you! Please! I can pay them off and we can go! We can leave and start a new life! Please let me help!" he moved forward, gripping onto Tsume's arm, "If you don't, they're going to kill us!"

The man avoided his eyes, his body tensing at the boy's touch, "I'll do something about it." He muttered, "I'll take care of it."

Toboe stepped back, letting go of his companion's arm as he grew angry with frustration. He couldn't hold back any longer, "That's what you keep saying and now someone is dead because you haven't done anything!"

The boy then gasped, clasping his hands over his mouth, thinking of what he'd just accused Tsume of. He could feel the man's anger becoming thicker and heavy, silence filling the air. He expected him to hit him, yell at him, do something… But he didn't do anything. Tsume just sat there, still leaning against the kitchen table, looking downward as his expression became angrier.

Toboe caught his breath, stepping back when he glanced to his right, seeing something on the coffee table. It was the book!

His heart skipped a beat as he ran to fetch it, leaving the man to gaze after him. He tripped halfway from the corner of the rug but caught himself and leant over to pick up the old, worn book. He smiled excitedly, beginning to flip through its contents. "Tsume, come here and look! This is it!" he exclaimed, "Everything is in this book. Do you remember? That guy, what was his name.. Mr. Hubb! He had the same book. He said it was the book of the moon… look!" He turned, holding the book out to his friend who was now leaning against the fridge facing him.

The book's pages were turned to an image of wolves running from a forest and into a field filled with flowers, their destination ahead, a paradise. "Tsume, it's all in here…" The boy took the book back into his hands, flipping through each page.

"Stop it." Words were muttered, but the boy did not hear them.

"Tsume, the journey! It's not over. It still has to be completed… that's why…" he gasped, "That's why we're here again! We never finished it!"

"Stop it…" came the words again, a little louder this time.

"We still have to find it! But… paradise… maybe it is here… in this world I mean… Is this the same world from before? Maybe it's just changed…" he flipped to the back of the book, seeing that the pages were filled with nothing but lunar flowers. "The flowers…" he whispered, "Cheza… Tsume!" he shot his head up.

"STOP IT!" Tsume yelled angrily, banging his fist against the fridge, causing it to shake as the boy became frozen, his eyes wide with fear.

"Fuck, Toboe!" he continued, his brow furrowed and eyes glaring, "Why won't you give it a rest? Aren't you happy enough? Why the hell do you want more? You're so fucking stupid!"

"But, Tsume…" Toboe breathed, reaching out to him.

"Enough! I'm not doing it again!" Tsume growled, "I can't do it again… I just can't," His voice began to lose the anger. He slipped into the seat next to him, a hand over his face, shielding his broken barrier from the boy's gaze. "I can't do it, Toboe. I'm sorry… But once was enough…"

Toboe watched as his companion covered his face with one hand as the other clutched the chair he was sitting in. He put the book back down on the table, finding himself crawling closer to Tsume. The boy bit his lip, feeling his heartbeat slowing down from the rush of excitement.

"I can't lose you again…" He heard Tsume mutter, his voice stricken with grief.

Toboe's heart then stopped, his eyes filling with tears. He crawled closer to his lover, leaning up and placing on hand on the man's knee. "Tsume," he sighed, reaching his other hand out to pull the man's hand away from his face. He wanted to be closer to him. He wanted to know what he was hiding. He wanted to see him.

But this man did not want to be seen. Out of defense, the man roughly pushed the boy away, sending him falling back, hitting the floor with a yelp of pain. Tsume gritted his teeth in embarrassment.

Toboe winced as he sat up, glancing up as he saw Tsume above him, his face now uncovered as he reached out to him. As he took the man's hand, he noticed his eyes softened and his expression saddened. He wanted to kiss away all of his older lover's fears and sorrows.

And he did just that when the older wolf lifted him to his feet, standing next to him with his hand still holding his own. Toboe clutched his hand tighter, leaning into Tsume's face and kissing him on the lips. The kiss was welcomed but it was not as passionate as it had always been before. It was simple. It was soft. It was gentle. It was sweet.

The boy leaned back, gazing into the man's glowing golden eyes, his own hazel ones sparkling with adoration. "Tsume, I love you." He whispered, pressing his head into the man's chest as he hugged onto him. He felt his strong arms wrap around him, pulling him closer. He didn't care right now that his words were not repeated back to him. He knew that the silver wolf loved him. He didn't need to say it. He already knew.

As Toboe was holding on to him, he noticed the television was on, the sound muted. He frowned as he saw the display on the screen. He felt his companion's arms let go of him, realizing that he too must have seen what was going on. He stepped back as Tsume bent over, turning the volume up enough for them to hear.

The two figures stood watching as the screen flashed images of a fire before moving on to the current recording of buildings reduced to burnt rubble. A reporter stood in front of the scene, barricades still set up behind her as men appeared to be going through the leftover mess. "Hello, Carrie Stanson here reporting for Channel 9 news at 5:00. We now have a confirmed story on the fire that took place in the downtown at 9:15 am this morning. As you can see, the fire caused a great disaster affecting many civilians and business owners, claiming three buildings and one person's life."

Tsume and Toboe froze, expecting the reporter to immediately state a name. But she continued her story instead, "Police believe that the fire was intentionally started. There are no further details on this allegation. Please call our 1-800 number at the bottom of the screen if you have any information on the fire or the death of Mr. Charles Jon. This is Carrie Stanson with Channel 9 news. Back to you, Tom."

"Thank you Carrie, on another note…" the anchorman took off into another topic before the television was turned off, the screen going black.

"Tsume!" Toboe glanced at the man who let go of the television's knob and stood up. He headed for the door, grabbing the black jacket on the back of the sofa. The boy leapt after him, "Tsume, where are you going?" he exclaimed worriedly.

"Stay here." Tsume spoke coldly, slipping into the jacket's arms.

"No! I'm coming too!" Toboe yelled, grabbing the man's arm as he leaned over the sofa, his knees on the cushions. He couldn't be alone right now. Not after everything that had just happened.

"No! Stay put! I'm going to take care of it!" Tsume growled

"No, Tsume! You can't! I didn't mean it!" he began to cry, clutching tighter onto his lover's arm, trying to pull him back. Something was wrong. He could feel it.

"GET OFF OF ME!" Tsume pushed him away, no apologies this time, "STAY HERE, YOU HEAR ME?" he screamed angrily at the boy. He grabbed the helmet off the back of the chair and opened the door, roughly slamming it behind him as he left.

Toboe didn't follow him. He just sat there on the sofa, frowning with worry. Tsume had yelled at him many times before. He had learned to be careful with this man who often frightened him… But this time was different. The energy in the air was heavy and dark, filling him with fear as he sat with no idea of what could happen.

…

The man looked at his watch as the sun slowly left the sky, the moon beginning to take its place. It was almost seven o'clock. He sighed as he leaned against a cold building within the dark alleyway, looking out along the empty street. Several minutes passed by as he waited impatiently, tapping his foot and clutching his fist. He could feel his blood boiling, a swelling feeling in the pit of his stomach. He did not feel ill. He felt enraged.

His golden eyes caught a car passing by, slowing when it neared the corner down the street. He watched as the vehicle turned and drove away, sighing to himself. He normally found himself questioning his own judgment. But not today. No. He was going to take care of the problem once and for all.

Their location was in the warehouse district, wasn't it? …Shit. He'd missed work today. Completely forgotten. That was just great.

Another car passed by, slowing again toward the end of the street. But this vehicle stopped.

He caught his breath, cautiously peeking around the concrete building that he was hiding behind. He watched as the driver's door was pushed open, the first man climbing out. It was him, the group's leader. He didn't even know his name. Why didn't he know his name? Not that it mattered now anyways…

Come to think of it, was it really just these guys? He'd never even thought about it until now. There could be more of them. He hadn't questioned about who ran the whole thing. Maybe it wasn't this guy? C'mon, really… Why didn't he think of this before? Fuck. He was gonna be in for it.

Two other men climbed out, finishing a conversation they'd apparently started in the car, "…right inside. Taking care of Jake. You fucked him up real bad, ya know?"

"Shut up! It was only cuz that guy pushed him on me." The man defended himself.

"Yeah right. You been itching to get him ever since he poked yer sister." The first one laughed.

"Fuck you, man!" the second one yelled angrily.

"Can it, you shit bags!" spat their leader, stepping onto the sidewalk, hands in his pockets as usual. He had a scowl on his face. He looked up and down the street cautiously, eyes slit with curiosity. One of his followers stepped up behind him, "What is it, Kev?" he asked.

Kev hesitated at first, keeping his eyes locked on the blank view down the street. There was nothing. It was dead. No cars, no people, nothing… just the sun going down on a Friday night. "Something's not right." He muttered, but left the idea when he heard the warehouse door being opened by one of the others. He turned and followed the other men into the building, not noticing a flash of a silver blur quickly slip inside before the door closed behind him.

The inside of the building was filled with many corridors, narrow hallways leading to different rooms and offices. There were boxes in the hallways, some stacked up neatly while others were fallen over, their contents spilling out. The walls and carpets were stained, a few dim lights occasionally flickering on and off. It smelt of mold, probably coming from the spots on the ceiling, leaks from past rains never cared for or mended.

Kev turned around a dark corner, opening a creaking door to a larger room as the other two men went the opposite way. He walked into the big space, ceilings high with timbers of wood stacked and leaned up against walls and shelves, long stations furnished with heavy machinery, tools and saws, chains with hooks dropping from the ceilings as sawdust gathered in clumps around his feet.

He looked up to an office settled on a platform about 15 feet off the ground, wooden stairs leading up. He sighed, grumbling something unheard to himself as he walked past the stations of unfinished woodwork.

Elsewhere in the building, the other men found themselves walking through the hallways looking for someone. "Jake?" one of them called, "Where are ya, man?" he turned one of the corners as the other one left him, turning inside an open doorway. He stopped and looked at him, "What are you-"

"I'm hungry." He quickly replied.

The other one smirked, "Yeah right. You just feel guilty."

"Like I said, FUCK YOU." He flipped him off, turning as he did so and walking away.

The first one shrugged, "Whatever." He sighed as he walked down the dimly lit hallway. He walked past a few rooms, still calling Jake's name as he poked his head into different doors. Where was he?

As he looked into another room, his hand on the side of the door, he felt a shiver go up his spine. What? "Jake?" he muttered. The lights above him flickered, causing him to look up, not noticing as he was approached from behind. He quickly gasped as he felt a wire immediately swung around his neck. He began to panic, clutching at his neck as he realized what was happening.

He fell back, feeling the person unknown from behind him, their hands pulling the wire tighter and tighter around his throat. He desperately tried to escape, slamming he and his attacker's body into the wall across the hallway. But it was no use, he could feel himself becoming faint as he tried to scream, nothing coming out. He clawed anxiously at the wire around his neck, his pulse quickening as his eyes found themselves closing, the blackness approaching around him. He couldn't… he just couldn't…

The man's body dropped to the floor, nothing escaping its lips as fate took hold. The wire was still clung around the neck, the imprint bruised onto the skin, the eyes of the corpse frozen and dead as the limbs lay in a tangled mess.

"Ryan?" a voice sounded down the dark hallway.

Jake sat in his chair, listening to the silence that was followed after noisy scuffling that was heard down other corridors. He had awakened to the sound of his name being called, each time growing closer. Ryan and the others had been looking for him. But now, it had stopped and there was no sound to be heard, just dead silence.

He found himself growing nervous as he wearily stood up, clutching onto his stomach where the painful stab wound was. It had been a while now, but it still hurt. He was still healing. He grimaced, slowly stumbling to the door in front of him, gripping onto the edge. "Ryan?" he breathed once more, finding his own voice fading. He was frightened. Something wasn't right. He could feel it.

The lights suddenly went out and he screamed, stepping back. He tripped when he stepped back, falling backwards and onto the floor. He felt the carpet beneath his hands, beginning to panic before the lights came back on, flickering once more. He closed his eyes and sighed, embarrassed at his own childish reaction. No wonder Ryan gave him such a hard time.

He began to stand up, wincing at the sudden pain surging through his gut. He pressed his hand there once more, looking down and grimacing. As Jake slowly removed his hand, he saw that his palm and fingers were covered in his own blood. "Shit," he whined. The wound had reopened.

As he was about to call for the others once more he noticed something from the corner of his eye. He quickly turned to face the doorway, leaning back on the palm of his other hand. There was nothing there. But he could have sworn he'd seen something… or someone.

"Ryan? …Sanji?" he called out, but only a whisper escaped his lips.

He glanced down at his wound. The blood now soaked into his clothing. But then he felt something. A presence. He quickly shot his head toward the doorway, only to hear a sharp snarl that was fitted to a pair of teeth lunging right for his face. He screamed as the sight, the sound and the pain took hold of him.

The man called Sanji fell back against the kitchen counter when he heard the shriek echoing from down the hallway. He dropped the empty glass from his hand and it shattered on the floor as he stumbled, hitting his knee when he fell. "Fuck!" he cried out in pain.

He looked down at the broken glass, not worrying about it as he still found his mind racing at the thought of whose scream that belonged to. Was it Ryan or Jake? Or Kev? No. He was with her, right? Shit. Why had he decided he was hungry?

He found himself clutching onto his sandwich, not noticing that it was still in his hands or that its contents were turning into mush. He gulped, walking out into the narrow hallway. He had to see what it was about. Wait. Maybe Ryan was playing some kind of joke on him. Yeah, like that was anything new.

He began to stumble through the dark hallway, his knee still aching as the lights flickered overhead. He traced a hand along the walls as he headed where the scream had come from. "Jake…. Ryannnn… Kev?" he bit his lip, gulping as he stopped at a corner.

It was then that Sanji noticed something on the floor. It was Ryan. "What the-" he gasped, ignoring his aching knee as he knelt over, poking at the body of his friend. "Ryan!" He turned him over, seeing what had become of him, the wire hanging from his bruised throat. He yelped, shooting back up to his feet and stumbling backward. "Fuck, fuck, fuck!" he yelled as he shook his head, turning the other direction and running. Jake, where was Jake? Where was Kev?

He turned another corner, noticing as the lights above flickered on and off. He was becoming so anxious that he didn't even know what direction he was going. The narrow hallways and corridors leading in various directions were like a maze. He stopped in his tracks as he approached a long hallway, the lights in that direction completely gone out. He looked back from where he came, but knew he could not go back.

There was only one way out.

Sanji gulped nervously as he limped toward the dark hallway, completely shrouded in darkness. He couldn't see anything. He only hoped that this was where the other two had gone. They had to be alive, right?

It was then that he heard a deep, low growl coming from within the darkness. He stopped, shivers running up his spine as the hair on the back of his neck stood on end. He froze, still clutching the mashed up sandwich in his hand. Out of the dark stepped a silver paw, then another one, claws digging into the carpet. Glowing golden eyes pierced the very core of the man's being, the animal's silver hair bristling, its ears swung back. It growled ferociously at him, sharp teeth gleaming in the flickering of the light above them. It was a wolf.

The man screamed, throwing the mess of food in his hand toward the beast. The wolf paid no attention to the remnants of the meal that landed next to him on the floor as he stepped slowly toward his cowering victim.

He noticed that the animal was stained with blood in his fur and mouth but it did not belong to the wolf. Is this what had become of his friends? His body shook, wanting to cry out but his voice was frozen. He stepped backwards each time the wolf moved closer to him.

"Run."

The shaking man didn't even take the time to notice that the beast had spoken to him. He just obeyed the command that he had heard, turning on his heels and running the opposite direction. His breathing quickened as he took off down the hallway, his arms clutched at his side as he tried to escape his eminent and cruel fate.

…

The man ran a hand through his hair, frowning to himself as he walked up the stairs to the office. He sighed, placing his hand on the doorknob and slowly turning it. He didn't need to deal with this. Was it really worth the money he was getting paid? Was it worth his sanity? The whole deal was starting to become too much.

He opened the door and entered, closing it behind him as he prepared himself for the worst.

Another door slammed open on the floor below, many feet away. It was the same door that the first man had entered into the warehouse. But this time another man entered into the timber filled workshop, stumbling to the floor. He screamed, desperately scrambling to get up.

The floor was slick and covered in sawdust, causing him to slip each time he tried to gain grip of his shaking body. Just then he felt a pair of sharp jaws quickly latch onto his right leg, pulling him back toward the door. "Noooo!" he screamed as he was dragged back by the beast he was running from.

He clawed at the ground in front of him, trying to escape. He could feel the bone of his lower leg crunching from the impact of those teeth. And then he remembered. He had a gun!

The man yelped again as the wolf roughly pulled him back, snarls escaping from his mouth. He looked back, turning his body halfway over as he quickly tried to reach into his pocket. Success! He swung the weapon out, immediately aiming and taking fire at the wolf. But as soon as he fired the gun the animal let go of him and quickly swerved to the right, lunging forward for his throat, latching on and sinking his teeth in.

The man's cry of pain came quickly but left suddenly as he was silenced, blood spilling out onto the floor, soaking into the yellow piles of shaved timbers. The body's eyes went blank, a final breath and all of the life left in him escaping from his lips.

Just then the office door above the room swung open, a man falling back and onto the stairs. "You weren't supposed to kill anyone!" a woman yelled from inside the office. The man gathered himself and stood up angrily, clutching the side of the wooden railing. "Look, lady! It was an accident!" As he yelled back at his employer something caught his eye.

It was Sanji, across the room, his body on the floor next to the warehouse door, lying in his own blood.

"What the hell?" he muttered to himself.

"What? What is it?" the woman's voice sounded again. She had heard him.

"Stay here." He replied coldly.

"What? Kev, what's going on?" the woman's voice sounded rushed and panicky.

"Something's wrong." The man answered once more as he reached for the office's doorknob and began to close it. With his other hand he reached into his left pocket, pulling out a gun. "Stay here. I'll find out." He closed the door, no reply coming from inside the office.

Kev grimaced, slowly stepping down the tall stairs, his eyes darting back and forth to check his surroundings. When he reached the bottom floor he looked around, seeing nothing out of place aside from the bloody body at the warehouse's door. It didn't look like anyone was there. But he knew that wasn't true. He could feel the presence of something, someone.

"Who's there?" he called out, his confidence brimming as he walked out, his gun ready to fire if necessary.

There was no reply at first, until he heard the echoing sound of a tool dropping on the hard cement floor. He spun in the direction the sound had come from, his gun aimed in both hands. He could feel his pulse quickening. "Come out! I know you're here!" he commanded.

Nothing.

He kept his gun aimed, backing up to the main door where Sanji's body lay. The lights above him began to flicker on and off. "Shit!" he cursed. He backed up faster now, feeling sweat brimming on his forehead. Another tool dropped, closer this time and from a different direction. He anxiously turned that way, not putting his gun down for one second.

Kev kicked the back of his heel into the body behind him, but there was no reply. He was dead. He knew it. He took a chance and quickly glanced back, hurriedly examining the body. A huge part of his throat was mutilated and torn out, the remnants bloody and spilling out onto the floor. There was another mark on the body's back leg; a bite wound.

"What the fuck?" he breathed, not noticing as hurried footsteps speedily approached.

He quickly turned when he finally heard them, firing off several shots in no particular direction as he panicked. A silver blur sped past him, a large snarl sounding off as the man dropped his gun when he felt sharp daggers blazing into his skin. He cried out in pain, grasping his hand with his other, desperately looking around for an explanation. And then he saw him, about twenty feet away. A wolf.

He gazed down at his wounded hand, the flesh torn apart and bloody. He looked up as the beast snarled at him again, hackles raised, teeth bared and dripping with the man's blood. It stepped one foot toward him, a menacing scowl in its glaring eyes.

The man shot his eyes around to see where his gun had landed, grimacing as the pain began to set in. He saw it! It had flown across the room, behind a couple of stations to his right, near the stairs to the office. He glanced back at the wolf who had also noticed the weapon on the floor. The man's eyes widened and he ran for it, ignoring the sound of the wolf growling and also running. There was no time! He couldn't look back!

As he swerved around the second workbench he tripped, his body tumbling to the cold cement floor. He yelped in pain when his ankle twisted beneath him, the sound of a crack ringing in his ears. He ignored the pain, blood drawing from his lip as he bit it, looking ahead to the gun a few feet ahead of him. He gasped and with all of his might tried to scramble towards it, his only escape.

As he was about to reach the only hope he knew, he saw another hand picking the gun up. His face spoke only fear as he looked up, seeing the man above him, an all too familiar face. "Y-You?" Kev growled. As his mind was trying to grip the reality of the situation, he quickly glanced around. The wolf was gone. He shot his eyes to the man once more, realizing everything when he noticed the man's body covered in blood, those wolf-like golden eyes blazing.

"I-it's you!" he screamed angrily, "WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU?"

And that was all that escaped his lips as the gun was fired into his head, his body immediately slumping to the ground. Blood spilled out onto the cement floor once more, the only remaining man standing coldly above the dead body, his eyes and facial expression vacant.

The silver haired man turned to his left, glancing up the stairs to the closed office door. This was it. This was the end. It had to be done. There was no other way. And now he knew there was someone else involved in the entire thing. He would tie up all lose ends and then he would finally be free of them.

As he slowly walked up the stairs his mind began to wander, recalling memories of the past, recent and far away. He thought of the boy, his tear stained face as he cried into his chest asking him why. He could imagine him smiling again, knowing that this was the only way to protect him. At least he could take care of him. He never had taken care of her.

This was for her too. This had started as her problem and then he had taken over. She had died and still the debt had followed him. He would never be free. Not until he finished it. Not until he had taken his revenge.

The doorknob turned, slowly opening the door at the top of the stairs.

A woman was behind a desk, her back facing the man as she scrambled behind the desk across the room. When she finally found what she was looking for she quickly spun around, facing the man, a gun in her hands and aimed at the man who stood in front of her, his eyes wide.

"Danielle?" he breathed.

* * *

><p>OMG! I know, right? …Reviews, please. :)<p> 


	14. Chapter 14

Okay… so I am going to warn everyone that this is probably the _darkest_ chapter of the entire fic. So please be warned. It is not for those weak of heart. It contains severe character abuse… It might disturb some readers. But if you can work through it, it does not last forever and it will be very important for the characters' developments. So bite your lip and bear with me, people…

FYI: If you prefer the "uncut" version, please check out adult fanfiction dot net or deviant art.

Caution: Further chapters will contain mature content such as language and yaoi, Tsume/Toboe. Be forewarned.

Disclaimer: I do not own the characters or series of Wolf's Rain. They belong to BONES & Keiko Nobumoto. This story is non-profit for my own and others' enjoyment. Thank you. :)

**I Hate You**

"Ts-tsume…" the woman breathed, slowly releasing the gun and lowering it to her side. Her eyes began to tear as she looked at the man who stood in front of her. She appeared to be shocked with disbelief, her eyes wide and mouth open. She stepped back, placing a hand over her forehead. "Is that really you?" she asked, shaking.

With that the woman bit her lip, left the gun on the desk and ran to the man in front of her, throwing herself against him. She cried into his chest, clinging onto him. But he did not wrap his arms around her or do anything. He just stood there.

In a moment and with a soft moan escaping her lips, the woman stepped back and gazed at him, smiling. But he did not smile back at her. He was frozen, his eyes vacant and gone. "Tsume?" she asked, "Aren't you happy to see me? It's been so long…" she reached up to his face in an attempt to caress him but the man grabbed her wrist and pushed her back.

"Why are you here?" he demanded angrily.

Danielle did not expect the cold reaction and stepped back against the desk. She glanced to her side, finding the location of the weapon on the top of the desk. It was only a few inches from her hand if she needed it. She glanced back to Tsume, frowning, "What do you mean?" she spoke slowly.

The man was enraged, his brow furrowed and his teeth gritted. Part of him wanted to strangle her, the other part longed to reach out to her and take her in his arms. But he couldn't do that. Something wasn't right. "You died… 3 years ago."

When she did not say anything he continued, "Keith told me you were dead. And I believed it! Why? Why are you here?" He wanted answers.

"He had to! To protect me!" she spat out, tears reappearing in her eyes. She gripped onto the desk behind her, "But they found out! And that's why I'm here! They came after me…" She looked down, "Tsume, please…"

"Where's Keith?" he growled.

"Um, I don't know. I'm not sure." She quickly replied.

"You do know." He accused her, "You're lying to me."

She could feel the tension in the room; it was too thick to even cut with a knife. This man wanted answers and she needed to give him something. As she was about to go on he continued, "You're lying about everything aren't you?"

There was no answer.

"I'm not fucking stupid!" he screamed. "TELL ME!" He didn't want to believe it. But he needed to hear it. He needed to hear her say it.

"I'm sorry!" she yelled, "Please, Keith made me do it! He's involved with this group and he needed the money. He really was going to die… I didn't have any other choice! He's my brother! Tsume, please!" She felt she was begging for her life as the look on his face was menacing. When there came no reply she continued, desperately trying to reach him. "I didn't want to hurt you… But don't you see? There was no other way…"

"You mean to tell me that for the past four years… Do you even realize what you put me through? I sold my soul to help you!" he yelled angrily, biting his lip, "Dammit, Danielle! I loved you!"

"Tsume, I'm sorry… I still love you. I always have…" she pleaded, stepping towards him.

"No." he replied coldly.

She stopped, waiting for his reaction, her hand reaching for the gun.

"It was all a lie. The whole damned thing!" he yelled, clutching his fist and slamming it into a pile of boxes that stood next to him. They were knocked over, their contents noisily spilling out onto the floor. "You have no fucking idea… what you have done…" he was growling now and he could feel his blood boiling inside of him, his animalistic instincts wanting to let go.

He looked up when he watched her quickly swing the gun at him again, her facial expression now changed to one of determination and anger. "Fine!" she spat, "If you won't listen to me then… then this is the way it has to be."

He couldn't believe how quickly she had changed her demeanor. Who was this?

"You never did get it. Don't you see? You were stupid!" she growled, "All those times, Keith asked you and you said no. You could have been something."

"What the fuck are you talking about?" he seethed.

"You know! Don't play stupid with me! …He wanted you to join up in that gang of his and you never would. You thought you were too good for him!" she explained, "I never even knew until he asked me…" she glanced down as her voice saddened before quickly looking back up, regaining her confidence. "It was always you that Keith paid more attention to... He never gave me the time of day! I wasn't even his sister to him. I was a pet!"

Tsume did not say anything as she continued, "But look at it all now!" she gestured one arm around the room, still aiming the gun in the other. "He did come to me eventually… when he saw that you were useless." She bit her lip, "I WAS THERE! …I LISTENED!"

"It was never like that." He growled.

"SHUT UP!" she screamed back at him, "LISTEN TO ME!"

"NO! YOU LISTEN!" he screamed back at her, "…I don't know why your brother is doing this or who he is working for but you can't do this! You're throwing your life away getting mixed up in all of this!" he yelled, pleading with her. He was angry but he couldn't watch this any longer.

"You don't get it, do you?" she asked coldly.

Tsume's facial expression began to change back to anger as she explained further, "It was me. I never needed Keith. I held all the power. With my brother, with the others… with you."

Danielle raised the gun, directly aiming it at the man's head. "This is the only way… I'm sorry, Tsume…"

The weapon was fired simultaneously as the woman's face became one of shock and horror, seeing not a man but a silver wolf lunging for her. The creature's body was massive and strong as it now stood over her, her body collapsed beneath him on the floor. "What are you?" she whispered slowly in disbelief.

The beast snarled at her, his fur and muscles soaked in the blood of her followers. His teeth were white and sharp, stained with red and gleaming in the light. She then found herself quickly aiming the gun once more at him, immediately firing as she attempted to defend herself.

It was when the shot had been fired that she also lost all consciousness, her life stolen in a moment's notice by dagger like fangs baring into her face and throat. Her eyes became locked with the wolf's piercing golden eyes, the sight forever frozen in the cold gaze of the lifeless woman's corpse.

…

The boy looked to the clock on the wall, sighing to himself. It had been at least two hours, but it felt much longer than that. He had been nervously watching the time ever since his companion left him alone. He was still sitting on the sofa, anxiously clutching his legs against his body. He buried his face into his knees as he sat there in the dark, waiting.

Where was Tsume?

He couldn't help but worry about him. The look on his face after that news report, the cold sound of his voice, everything… it had scared him. What was going on? He figured he had gone to meet those men that were after them. But what if… what if something had happened? What if he didn't come back?

Toboe thought about this idea for a moment. He felt his heart stop. Why didn't he stop him?

He was so sick of his own insecurities of being fearful of everything. But he was trying. He had spoken up many times, stood up for himself and… said things he knew he shouldn't have.

Was it because of what he said? …He had made terrible accusations of his friend. And now, when it mattered the most, he had just let Tsume go.

The sound of the front door opening stole the boy from his thoughts. He spun around to see the man returning from his errand, slowly opening the door. "Tsume!" he shouted gleefully, happy to see him back home in one piece.

He leapt off the sofa, running to greet him at the door. "I was so worried! I'm so glad-" he stopped when a metallic scent entered his nostrils. He could barely see the man entering through the door as it was very dark, no light aside from the overcast shadows of the half-full moon. "Tsume," he breathed anxiously, watching as the man stepped past him.

Toboe closed the door behind him, turning back to face him. He could now see that the man's clothes were stained in blood. "Tsume, are you injured?" He began to panic but quickly realized that the blood did not belong to him at all.

"Tsume, what-" the boy's words were cut off when the man took hold of his lips with his own. He held onto his arms, slamming him against the wall behind them. The boy cried out in pain as he felt the hard wall hit his back. The man's tongue entered his mouth, shooting to the back of his throat, his lips pressing hard against him.

Toboe yelped, moving his face away from him. "Tsume!" he shouted, still smelling the blood on him. It was not only on his clothes but on his breath as well. What had happened?

He struggled beneath the strong body, trying to move out from under him. He felt pain in his arms as the man's hands dug into him, his body pressed hard against him. blushed furiously. The man moved to kiss his neck, nipping at him with his teeth. The boy cried out again, throwing his head back as an odd energy surged up his body. What was he… what was he doing? Why was he acting like this?

"Tsume," he breathed, "No, please…"

It was no use. This wasn't the Tsume that he knew. He wasn't there anymore.

…

The boy collapsed onto the cold wooden floor, seeing the man above him through the strands of auburn hair that fell into his face. The boy shot his eyes downward, embarrassed and not wanting to face him as he lay frozen on the floor. But it was not long before he saw the man's legs walking out of the room, loudly slamming a door from the hallway, closing it behind him.

It was then the boy finally let himself go. He curled his weak legs up against himself, wincing at the pain as he did so. He brought his shaking hands up to cover his face, ashamed. He cried painfully, wet tears and snot seeping through his fingers. The sound of the shower being turned on echoed from the hallway. He listened as he moaned painful tears, wanting to wash away everything that had just happened. "Ts-tsume…" he choked through his sobs.

…

It was an hour or so later that he heard the faucet being turned off. The boy's face was red and swollen from his sorrow filled emotions. He wanted to keep crying but he couldn't let himself go now that the man might see him. He was afraid, afraid of what more he might do. He listened quietly, still lying on the floor in the same position, keeping his body frozen as if it might protect him.

His eyes widened when he heard the bathroom door now opening and he felt himself begin to shake. He wanted to run away, he wanted to hide, but he couldn't move. He felt trapped inside of his own body. But then he heard footsteps venturing from the bathroom to another door in the hallway, his bedroom.

He could feel his pulse begin to race as his body became unlocked. He sat up, holding back a groan as the pain shot through his weak body. But he ignored it, gathering his pants at his heels and pulling them up. He gripped onto the corner of the wall behind him, bringing himself up to his feet. Biting his lip, he entered into the hallway, looking down the dark corridor to his bedroom door. There was light coming from underneath the door, shadows forming. He had to move quickly.

He found himself hurriedly stumbling to the bathroom a few feet away, unable to run. Once inside he shut the door behind him, leaning back against it. He sighed a breath of relief, catching a glimpse of himself in the mirror. Looking away shamefully at the image, he proceeded to the tub.

It was still steamy from Tsume having just used it.

Tears were brimming on his eyes again as he knelt down to turn the shower on. "Tsume…" he muttered to himself, his sobs coming back. He began to slowly strip off the articles of clothing as he sat on the edge of the tub. Everything smelt like blood and sex, including himself. He had to wash it all away. He couldn't stand it. He felt sorrowful. He felt violated. He felt inhuman.

He crawled over the edge of the tub, standing up and pulling the curtain across. He stood there as tears streamed down his face along with the water pouring down on him. The warm water felt so good on his aching body. He began to get lost in his thoughts as he looked up to the ceiling, feeling comfort from the warm water soaking into his hair and the shadows of light that flickered through the shower curtain.

Nothing would ever be the same now. Everything they had shared together… It meant nothing. Nothing. He felt so alone.

He reached out for a bar of soap down by his knee, biting his lip when he bent over to do so. As he rubbed the soap along his body, he winced as it touched painful spots that would be bruised by tomorrow.

He did this to him. Tsume.

He didn't want to believe it. He didn't want to accept it. He couldn't accept it.

What was wrong with him? Why did he have so much faith in that man?

As he was beginning to lose hope before he heard the sound of the bathroom door being slowly opened. His body became frozen, his eyes widening. His breathing stopped as his mind began to race. No… Why hadn't he locked the door?

He found himself back up against the shower's wall, watching a shadow coming closer through the curtain. And then a hand drew up to pull back the curtain, a leg stepping in over the edge. The body of the man was naked. He didn't have to look at his face. He knew it was Tsume.

He couldn't look at him. "No!" he screamed, turning around to run away, but he was stopped by the shower's wall. He had nowhere to go. He was trapped.

He began to panic. He couldn't do this again. Not ever again. "No, Tsume! Please, no!" he begged, not holding back any tears. He didn't care anymore. It would never be the same so what did it matter?

He felt his arm being grabbed, turning his body around. He pulled back, resisting as his free arm began to beat upon the man's shoulder. "No!" he shouted as he was pulled closer. And then he felt something inside of him snap lose. He became enraged with anger, bitterness and hatred. He would not be taken so easily, not again.

"GET AWAY FROM ME!" he screamed through his tears, freeing his arm and pushing the man away, causing him to step back.

"Toboe," came a soft voice.

_No_, he thought. He would not look at him, not wanting to identify the man's features of his face. He would not be broken.

"Toboe…" the voice came again as he saw arms reaching out to him. "Toboe, I'm-"

"NO!" he angrily cut off the man's words. He waved an arm at him, managing to strike the man across the face. His heart stopped, not knowing what he might do now. He pushed himself off of the man and back to the shower wall, finding himself slumping down to the tub's floor.

Toboe wrapped his arms around himself for protection, bringing his legs up against his body. He buried his face into his knees as water dripped from his soaked hair and face. "Leave me alone!" he yelled, "Go away!" He bit his lip and continued, "I DON'T WANT YOU ANYMORE!"

His eyes widened and his body froze when he said that, realizing that it was all over. Everything they had together really was gone.

But his thoughts were soon interrupted when he felt a strong hand on his arm, pulling him back up to his feet. He was forced into the man's embrace, strong arms wrapped around him. He began to resist once more until the man speak, "I'm sorry, Toboe!" He could hear the shaking in Tsume's voice. Was he crying?

The hug grew tighter, "I'm so sorry…" the man repeated.

Toboe pulled back, beating as hard as he could upon Tsume's chest. "No! No… no, no… no…" With each word he spoke the boy could feel himself releasing the anger. He gave up, falling completely into the man's arms. He frowned, feeling Tsume shaking, choking out his sobs as he tightly held onto the boy's body.

The boy found himself wrapping his arms around the sobbing man that held onto him. Toboe buried his head into his chest, biting his lip. "I hate you, Tsume…" he muttered, tears now streaming down his own face.

* * *

><p>I know… it's gonna get better, I promise. Everything will change now, for the better. :) I know a lot of you probably hate me for abusing them… I'm almost afraid to ask for reviews. …But please keep reading! No more bad stuff between them, only fluff from here on out! :D<p> 


	15. Chapter 15

Ahhhh… so glad I finally got this next chapter done. :) After we left off of the last one, I was afraid I'd lost people. ^^() This chapter is mostly dialogue, fyi. But that is the best part. 3 Here we go… It's so fluffy! :D

FYI: If you prefer the "uncut" version, please check out adult fanfiction dot net or deviant art.

Caution: Further chapters will contain mature content such as language and yaoi, Tsume/Toboe. Be forewarned.

Disclaimer: I do not own the characters or series of Wolf's Rain. They belong to BONES & Keiko Nobumoto. This story is non-profit for my own and others' enjoyment. Thank you. :)

**I Will Wait For You**

The sound of water tapped repeatedly against the porcelain tiles, dripping down to the floor of the tub. Two figures still clutched onto each other as the water washed past their feet and down the drain. The younger of the two struggled to hold on, a troubled expression on his tear stained face. It had seemed forever that he had been standing there, letting his companion hold him. But it wasn't for him, was it?

The boy frowned as he realized that he had given in and lost himself once again. Everything had changed between the two of them. He knew that. But he couldn't help himself. He was weak and he knew it. No matter how many times he was hurt, he always gave in… But he couldn't just go back now, could he?

He quickly thought of an excuse as he pulled back, "I need to… go lie down." He muttered. That wasn't the whole truth.

The boy didn't want to face him as he turned away, half surprised that Tsume even let him do so. He had been holding onto him so tightly, as if he were afraid to let go. He didn't look back as he stepped out of the tub, reaching for a towel to cover his naked, sore body. As he wrapped the towel completely around himself, pulling it over his head, he heard the faucet being turned off.

Footsteps sounded behind him as he reached for the knob on the bathroom door. He just wanted to ignore them. He didn't want to be bothered. Right now, he just wanted to crawl into his warm bed and disappear for a while.

As he stepped out over the threshold, he found himself being lifted off of his feet. In a moment's notice he was in the man's arms, still clutching the towel to his chest as it was wrapped around him. The boy glanced up instinctively at his carrier's face but then quickly turned away. He closed his eyes and bit his lip, not wanting to say anything.

It wasn't that he was still afraid. He was too weak to protest. His decision had been made and he did not want to go back.

He lay completely still as he felt himself being carried into his bedroom. He opened his eyes when he knew they were above his bed. As his body was laid gently onto the bed, he grabbed at the sheets, replacing his towel with them. The boy burrowed into the thick comforter, fitting his head onto his pillow as he pulled away from Tsume, facing the wall.

The boy hoped that he would leave now, go off into the other room and let him be. Moments later he assumed he had done just that until he felt the bed go down slightly. He frowned.

"Toboe, please look at me." came the man's voice. It was soft and pleading.

Toboe didn't answer.

"Look," he continued, "I know that I can't just take it all back… and I'm sure that it doesn't mean much… but please believe me when I say that I'm sorry."

Toboe didn't want to hear this. He had had enough. He just couldn't deal with it right now. He closed his eyes instead of staring at the wall, wishing for Tsume to just go away. He did not want to look at him. The last time he'd seen his face was when… He couldn't, he just couldn't face him.

It was when he felt a hand on his shoulder that his eyes opened. His body tensed as he listened to more of what Tsume had to say, "I'm not asking you to forgive me. What I did… it was wrong… I don't even… I can't…" He was beginning to choke on his words.

Toboe found himself becoming softened as Tsume spoke. That was something he did not want. He wanted to yell at him, to make him leave. But he couldn't do that either. He couldn't do anything at all. He felt so helpless.

Tears began to form in his eyes. Suddenly he felt himself being pulled away from his comfort, turned around to face Tsume and into his arms once more. "No…" he whispered, knowing that he had not been heard.

Tsume held the boy next to him, trying to comfort him as he rubbed his back. He felt so guilty, disgraced and even embarrassed. He wanted to leave Toboe alone and go off by himself to think, but he knew that he couldn't. If he did, he might lose everything… it would all be over. He had to fix this and make things right again.

The man nuzzled the boy's head, feeling his wet hair against his cheek. He frowned, reaching for the towel that had been thrown off to the side. He sat back, rubbing the towel against Toboe's soaked head to sop up the leftover water from the shower. The boy sat there quietly, still avoiding eye contact with him. His body was limp beneath his touch, making the man frown.

Toboe grabbed onto the sheets on top of his lap as Tsume dried his hair with the towel. "Tsume, I don't…" he could feel himself becoming angry, "I don't need…" He knew that the man was trying, but he didn't want to try. He had given up a long time ago. Finally he turned his head up to face him, his hazel eyes blazing and brimming with tears. "You don't have to do this!" he snapped, not caring about the anger in his tone.

Tsume stopped and slowly lowered the towel, dropping it on the floor. "Toboe…" he spoke softly, seeing the boy's hurt and pleading expression. He then watched Toboe bite his lip and turn away, not wanting to face him. "Please… just go away…" he muttered, sniffling and bringing his hands up to cover his face.

The man frowned and looked away, pausing for a moment before he slowly stood up. He stood next to the bed, glancing back at Toboe who was now softly sobbing into his hands. Tsume could feel his own eyes welling up as he stared at the image, the guilt inside of him overwhelming. He turned away, "Toboe, I'm… I'm going to go sleep on the sofa." He choked on his words, slowly stepping towards the open doorway.

Toboe looked up, a tear falling down his right cheek. He didn't say anything as he watched Tsume walk away from him. He noticed that the man was now wearing pajama bottoms, realizing that he must have slipped them on after he had laid him on the bed. The boy looked down once more after he watched Tsume disappear beyond the door, closing it behind him. A part of him felt guilty… but he knew that he couldn't let himself think like that. He laid back down, pulling the blankets and sheets up to his neck and tucked himself in tightly. He lay there still in his thoughts, wanting to erase his mind completely so that he could sleep.

He shivered, realizing how cold it was and that he was still naked under the sheets. But he couldn't get up to find clothes; he was too tired, too weak and still in pain. It was all Tsume's fault.

No.

Toboe bit his lip, whining a little as he tightly shut his eyes, trying not to think about it.

…

What seemed like only minutes were actually hours that passed by. It was still dark out, not even the moon shining through the crack of the curtains as the sky was cloudy that night. The boy was still staring at the wall as he lay in bed, the covers wrapped around him. He sighed, his eyes now as sore as his body.

He just didn't know anymore. He was so hurt that Tsume could do something like that to him, with no resistance at all. Even when he had begged him to stop, cried out for mercy… he didn't listen, he just kept going.

The boy winced at those thoughts, the pain receding back into his body as he remembered. He didn't want to remember. His mind and heart were in turmoil, trying to understand the night's events. Why had he done that? What made him treat him so cruelly?

His mind began to race to the way things used to be, not only in this life but the last. He saw Tsume as his protector and friend. He believed in him, they fought for something they both believed in… and he had loved him. He closed his eyes, trying to blot the images from his thoughts. Right now… he didn't want to remember anything.

But he had to wonder… what had caused him to change like that?

What had happened to his Tsume?

His Tsume…

He couldn't help it, thinking like that…

He'd told Tsume that he believed in him, that he trusted him, that he loved him and now… that he hated him.

Had everything really changed for good? Would things ever be the same? Could he have it all back? Did he even want it back? What if…

The boy sighed, knowing that he was going there again. He was always so quick to forgive and forget. He was too trusting, too naïve and stupid… This wasn't right. This relationship they had together was not right, was it? It was sick really… He felt ill for thinking like that, going around in circles with this man.

But he loved him.

He bit his lip, closing his eyes as tears formed once more. He couldn't help it.

Reaching out into the darkness, he found a pillow next to him and pulled it closer. As he breathed in, he realized that it was Tsume's pillow, covered in his scent. He moaned, frowning with frustration as the tears began to fall again. "Tsume…" he sobbed, holding on the pillow, pretending it was really him.

There was a part of his lover that was so scary and dark… not even human. But he knew there was also a part of Tsume that was beautiful. That was the side that was his protector, his caregiver and lover. He knew that even though this man could hurt him with words, hurt him even in the worst ways imaginable… there was still that part of him that loved him too.

It wasn't in the boy to hold onto hate like this… it was only making things worse. He wanted to understand all of Tsume… He'd even told him that before… He wanted to know every part of him… even the bad… He knew that he had to live up to that promise. And right now… he just had to know…

The boy sat up, ignoring the pain shooting through his body. He wrapped the blankets around him, slipping over the edge of the bed. He had to go to him. He had to be near him and feel him once more. As he stood up, slowly walking towards the door his mind began to recall memories of the past, from long ago and not so far away.

He remembered when he met Tsume for the first time, realizing that he too was a wolf. He knew then that wasn't alone anymore. Whenever he tried to reach out to this man he was pushed away, the older wolf not wanting to get too close to him. But he did. He had saved him time and time again.

He knew that it was Tsume when he saw him on the street that day as he passed by on his motorcycle. His heart was fighting for him from the very beginning, wasn't it? Just as before, he longed to be near him. And because of that, they both remembered in that alleyway that day… all of the moments… the good, the bad… every moment that they had shared.

They had gone through so much together. He couldn't give up now.

"Tsume…" he sobbed, wiping his face as he used his other hand to reach for the doorknob.

…

The man resituated himself, the muscles in his legs and rear tightening as he sat uncomfortably on the wooden floor. He leaned up against the wall, throwing his head back and sighing. He found himself sitting right outside the bedroom door, almost as if he were guarding him. But was he really protecting him? Or was he making sure that the kid wasn't going anywhere without him?

Shit.

That wasn't right.

He hated himself for what he had done to him. He wanted to scream.

He let everything get out of control. It was like something else took over him. After everything he went through that night he just lost himself to all of the anger within him. And that's what took over, the darkness inside of him. Things would never be the same now.

He knew that Toboe saw him as something different. There was something off about the kid in that way. Why would he be attracted to a person like him in the first place? He was so different from him, the exact opposite. The kid was so carefree, happy and so innocent… well, not anymore.

He wanted to die for what he'd done. He was sick. He knew it.

Would it be better if he left now? He could just go back to what his life was before he ever saw him on the sidewalk that rainy day. He could go on the way things had been, living day to day without meaning other than to just be. He would just simply exist, for nothing more and nothing less.

The boy would be alone once more, without a friend or family member to be spoken for. He would most likely sit there in that house alone, empty and broken hearted as his life withered away around him.

Was that the right answer?

Or…

Would things ever go back to the way that they were? Or had he fucked that up, just like everything else in his life? It wasn't just now… but everything that went way back, the mistakes, the stupid shit he caused, even the lives that were lost…

It had been his fault once again. Toboe had died. And it was because of him.

He had always been there to protect him. But not then… Not when the boy needed him the most. No, he'd sent him off to search for the humans, giving him the responsibility that he should have taken himself. He was just a kid and he knew there was danger out there.

He never had the chance to say what he really wanted… how much he cared for him… to tell him who he himself really was… and what the boy meant to him… everything… it was all lost in an instant.

How could he do this?

He couldn't lose him again, not like this. Once again it was all his fault.

He wanted to go to him, to start over and try again. But… he had hurt Toboe so badly... that he didn't know if the boy was every capable of healing. He couldn't be near him right now… he was not well.

The man pulled his legs up against his chest, wrapping his arms around them and burying his face into his knees. He sighed, knowing that he was exhausted. But he couldn't leave now. He had to be there for him, even if it was only on the other side of a wall.

Just then he heard the door a few feet away from him creak open. He quickly looked up, not noticing that his body had taken wolf form when he watched the boy stepping out into the hallway. He stood up on all four feet, realizing that his body must have changed in order for Toboe to face him without immediate memories or fears.

The boy glanced to his left, seeing the silver animal in front of him. His eyes welled up, "Tsume…" he cried, dropping to his knees and wrapping his arms around the wolf. He cried into his soft fur, clutching onto his muscular build. The beast pressed his head against him, closing his eyes and whimpering softly. He remained still, sitting there as the boy tightly held onto him, burying his face into his silver fur as he sobbed.

…

The boy found himself staring at the white ceiling above him, his hazel eyes sleepily half closed. His hair was spread out on the pillow beneath him, his body bare from the waist up, the rest of him underneath the blankets. He could hear the rain falling outside, slowly lulling him into a dream world. As he was about to finally drift off into a deep sleep he heard the wolf next to him murmur something, "Don't stop… That feels nice..."

The boy glanced down at the animal resting next to him, its large head laying on the curve of his right hip. He began to stroke his hand through the silver fur once more, slowly turning his head back to the ceiling. Closing his eyes for a moment he sighed, the expression on his face blank as he reopened his eyes, still half closed.

He didn't know why he was here, in this bed with him once again. Had he given up on fighting it?

He felt so weak, not only in body but in mind. He couldn't think straight.

The boy slowly stopped moving his hand, waiting for the animal to respond, wanting to be petted. But he didn't, instead he stretched out and crawled over the boy. He laid out across his abdomen and legs, snuggling his head against the boy's stomach. His fur felt so soft and warm against his bare skin.

The silence was deafening and he couldn't bare it any longer, even though he was too tired to start a conversation right now. He just had to know. He wanted to find peace and he knew the older wolf needed that as well.

"Tsume?" he asked, still staring at the ceiling.

"Hmmm?" the wolf breathed, warm air escaping his nostrils.

"Did you kill those men?" the question was clearly spoken.

The animal's golden eyes opened and he stared for a moment at the wall across from the bed. His ears twitched to the sound of the rain pouring down faster, the plant hung outside the window beating against it with the wind. He rolled his body over and off of the boy, laying next to him on the blanket, not looking at him. "Yes." The answer was simple.

"Is that why you…" the boy hesitated, "Is that why you… were so angry and…" It was hard for him to get it out. His mind began to recall images as he felt himself growing weaker. Tears began to form in his eyes, frustrating him. He bit his lip, his eyes still focused on the ceiling and the sound of the rain. He closed his eyes for a moment, trying to erase the memories.

When he opened them again, he saw that Tsume was lying next to him, hovering halfway over him, his body changed back into his human form. "No!" the boy yelped, covering his face with his hands. He immediately felt both of his wrists pulled back from him, Tsume's grip on him strong. The boy kept his eyes closed, still not wanting to face him.

"Toboe, you have to look at me." The man's voice was agitated but still held sadness in the tone, "You can't just keep avoiding me." He moved his body completely on top of him, holding the boy's wrists away from his face. He shifted his eyes to the left, also wanting to avoid eye contact. The kid's eyes were tightly closed, his face wet with tears again and his lip quivering. It only made him feel worse to see that. He wanted to end this.

Tsume bit his lip before continuing, "Toboe, please stop. You're making it worse…" He could feel anger boiling in his stomach because of the guilt he felt. He hated this about himself, getting angry over everything before the rage consumed him and he did something stupid because of it. He had let the dark feelings take over that very night, releasing his tension on the boy and hurting him deeply… not only physically but emotionally.

He bit his lip, knowing what he had to do, "Toboe!" he yelled.

The boy's eyes flew open, widened and teary as he looked up at him. The man wasn't facing him but looking off to the side, avoiding eye contact. Even though that made things easier, he still had to force himself to look at him and listen to what he had to say.

"Look, I did what I had to do… to protect us. I didn't have a choice."

Toboe frowned, "That's not what I asked!" He stopped, shocked that he would even say that. Turning his head to the side, he bit his lip again, trying to quell the anger rising inside of him. Really? How could Tsume not see what he had done to him?

He was broken because of him.

Tsume glanced back at the kid, realizing that he wasn't getting anywhere. He moved off of him, lying next to him on the bed and propping his arm up to rest his head. "Toboe, I know that's not the explanation that you wanted…" he sighed, "But what am I supposed to say? I already said that I was sorry… It will never happen again." He frowned, softening his voice, "I just want you to trust me." He reached out, placing his hand over Toboe's.

The boy immediately moved his hand from underneath the man's, turning over to face away from him. He sat in silence for a moment, stewing over the racing thoughts within his mind. He didn't know what to say or if he should even say anything at all. He didn't know what would come out. But he tried anyways, "How?" he asked, trying to hold back tears.

Tsume sat up next to him and leaned over, frowning as he watched the boy's face. "It will take time, I know that-"

"No! …Tsume, why did you…" Toboe rolled back over, deciding to finally face him. He looked up at Tsume who was leaning over him, sitting next to his side. He could feel his warm touch through the sheets, feeling his face flush. Tsume's eyes seemed to glow in the dark, their look softened and painful. The boy quickly glanced away, not wanting to lose his train of thought.

He continued, "Tsume… you hurt me…" he began to cry.

"Toboe, I-"

"No! You can say that you'll never do it again... but how do I know that?" Toboe glanced back up again, his face softening after his outburst of anger. "You changed... What you did to me… I didn't even know who you were." His tears began to fall faster just as the rain was outside and he moaned as he bit his lip.

When Tsume leaned in and pull him into an embrace, the boy's eyes widened. But instead of pushing him away, he latched on, letting the man hold him in his arms. He cried, nudging his head against Tsume's, feel the warmth of his neck on his own. He could feel the man's hands on his back, tightly pressing on his skin as he held him closely.

Both of them knew that neither one wanted to let go.

The man's fingers were tangled in the mess of the boy's auburn hair, his other hand on his back. He knew that they had not completely resolved anything. If at all, matters had only become even tenser between them. He didn't know if the kid even loved him anymore after everything that he'd done. All he knew was that he wanted to near him, to feel him and to love him just as he always had.

And he knew that now. He really did love him.

He kissed the side of Toboe's head as the boy cried, still caressing him as he spoke, "I'm not going anywhere," he spoke softly, "I know that I hurt you… I don't care if you hate me after what I've done." He continued with a short breath, "But if you still want me, even after all that has happened… I promise I will make everything better."

Tsume leaned back to look at the boy, brushing the hair out of his face with his finger. He softly kissed the boy's forehead, feeling him becoming relaxed in his arms, his sobbing slowing. He pressed his own forehead against Toboe's, closing his eyes just as the boy had. He exhaled slowly, releasing the tensions that had built up inside of him before he finished, "I will always be here. No matter how long it takes… I will wait for you."

* * *

><p>:D …Reviews, please. 3<p> 


	16. Chapter 16

Thank you for your patience! No seriously… I know it took me a bit so I'm glad you're still with me. ^^ …So, I am curious. How many ever checked out that music I mentioned, at least on youtube or whatnot? Lately Coldplay's been doing it for me. They had one song on that playlist… Well anyways, I hope you enjoy this next chapter. There will be another soon. It won't be as long as the wait for this one was… No more school until fall, yaaaaay…. ;)

FYI: If you prefer the "uncut" version, please check out adult fanfiction dot net or deviant art.

Caution: Further chapters will contain mature content such as language and yaoi, Tsume/Toboe. Be forewarned.

Disclaimer: I do not own the characters or series of Wolf's Rain. They belong to BONES & Keiko Nobumoto. This story is non-profit for my own and others' enjoyment. Thank you. :)

**Goodbye**

The boy slowly fluttered his eyes open as he heard the sound of a bird singing outside his window. There was light that crept onto the edge of his bed, the floor and walls, creating shapes with the shadows. It was morning, wasn't it?

He sighed, wearily sitting up in his bed. He winced as he did so, the pain returning to him. Sitting there for a moment, waiting for it to reside, he could smell the leftover rain from the night before outside the window. Occasionally there would be a drop of water that would land on the windowsill, accompanying the bird's melody.

As he wearily rubbed his eyes with one arm he glanced to his right, assuming that his companion would still be there, lying next to him and asleep. But he was not. The boy frowned and sighed, leaning his head back to the ceiling and closing his eyes.

He couldn't keep going on like this.

He reopened his eyes once more when he heard the sound of a faucet being turned off, not even realizing that it had been running in the first place. Looking around for something to wrap around himself, he found a shirt that presumably belonged to his lover crumpled on the edge of the bed. He shivered when he stepped out of bed, hoping that summer would hurry along. He didn't like the cold. He never did.

As he walked over to the door, the cold breeze against his bare legs reminded him of his previous travels in the snow. He wanted to smile, but he couldn't as the memories began to fade from joy to sorrow. He recalled the time he had laid with Blue's old man to keep him from freezing to death as well as the moment he had first died, the image of Tsume in his mind before he finally drifted off into that deep sleep.

Tsume…

He remembered the trouble he had gone through to be close to him, how long it had taken before the older wolf had finally warmed up to him. Those long, cold nights in the snow, lying next to his friends to keep safe and warm. He could feel the warmth again on his skin and it made him long for those moments once again.

He placed a hand on the door, pushing it slowly open as the doorknob was not latched. Peering into the hallway he could see light glowing underneath the bathroom door. Walking down the hall he stopped at the entrance to the living room and kitchen, glancing around. Everything was clean. There was no sign of struggle from the night before. Everything just looked normal.

The boy frowned as he looked down to his bare feet, placing a hand over his stomach as it growled. He grimaced but looked up again when he heard the sound of water moving in the tub within the bathroom.

He sighed, feeling as if he could cry but there was nothing left. All of his tears were fully spent.

He wanted everything to go back to the way it was before, before everything had changed…

There was still something that he saw in Tsume despite of everything. It made him feel safe, it made him feel happy and it made him feel sad… There was also something else inside of his lover that he could not get rid of. And he now realized that wasn't up to him. He could not heal the older wolf. That was something Tsume had to do for himself. Until the man let go of the darkness inside, the boy could never fully trust him.

Approaching the bathroom door, he knew what he had to do. He reached out to the doorknob, slowly turning it and stepping inside. He turned and quietly closed it behind him, not wanting to release the hot steam in the air. As he turned back around, expecting to see him in the bathtub, he saw that the curtain was pulled. He felt relieved for a moment.

When he moved to the sink, he heard him speak, "Toboe?"

The boy hesitated for a moment but then decided to speak up, "Y-yes… I'm just brushing my teeth." He began to do so, listening for a reply. When nothing came he continued brushing his teeth, listening to the water swirling around in the tub. He imagined what Tsume might look like in the bath, the steam rising from his tanned muscles... No.

He stopped brushing and spat into the sink, looking up at his muddied reflection in the fogged mirror. …He couldn't think like that. As he began to wash his face, he listened as the older wolf spoke up once more, "How are you feeling?" his voice was low and monotone, no doubt guilt still within him.

Grabbing the towel to his right, Toboe heard the curtain being drawn back. After he'd dried his face he glanced up to see Tsume's reflection in the mirror, sitting in the bathtub, his arms on each edge. Toboe instinctively turned around, leaning against the sink.

"Would you like to join me?" the man asked him, glancing away, "The warm water might help… if you're sore that is." Tsume looked back toward him, watching the boy grip the edge of the sink as he met his eyes, his expression confused and somehow vacant. He wanted to make up for everything. He knew it would take time, but he was concerned that if he didn't act quickly, his lover would soon slip away from him. But then he thought twice, not wanting to scare him away either, "I'm sorry… You don't have to take a bath with me. I can get out and let you-"

"No," came a soft reply, the boy looking down at his feet. "I'd like that…"

Tsume didn't understand how the boy could be so trusting after what he'd done to him. He watched as Toboe pulled the shirt that he was wearing up and over his head, letting it drop to the floor. The boy was frowning and blushing and he sensed that the kid was anxious, knowing that he was being watched. He looked up at him then and Tsume gritted his teeth and turned away from him after seeing his bare body. He was even more ashamed now than ever, this boy standing in front of him, his skin pale and swollen with dark bruises and cuts all over his frail figure.

Toboe slowly stepped over to him, "Tsume?" he asked, wondering why he wouldn't face him.

"Look at you. I did that to you… Me." came the reply.

Toboe looked down at his naked body, examining the bruises that had gotten much worse overnight. It didn't hurt as much as it had the night before, but it still looked pretty awful. It was a painful reminder for the both of them. He frowned sadly, knowing that his lover really did feel regret. He still wanted to help him understand. In his heart he'd already forgiven him. He couldn't help it, "It's okay, Tsume… I know you didn't mean-"

"No! It's not okay!" he spat angrily, "You're like a sad little puppy, coming back to me every time… It's not right."

The boy looked down, frowning and embarrassed at the accusation. Yes, it was true. There really was something wrong with him. Even Tsume knew that.

Tsume continued looking at him, realizing that he'd done it again. His face softened quickly as the boy's expression was sad. He reached out to him, taking the boy's hand. "I'm sorry… Please come here," he spoke gently. The boy looked at him then, the man's golden eyes filled with tenderness for him.

Toboe nodded and slowly stepped into the tub, tensing at first when the warm water hit his cold skin. He gripped onto Tsume's hand when he did so, feeling the man's other hand on the back of his thigh. He did not lose his gaze as he stood in front of him, thinking that the man might try something now that he stood fully exposed there. A part of him knew that he might give into any advance, he felt so mentally gone right now…

But Tsume didn't do anything. Instead, he gently nudged him to turn around. He went along with the direction and turned around, his back facing his lover as he gradually sat down. He listened to the water moving as Tsume spread his legs out, scooting back into him as his arm was pulled that way. "Relax," came the man's voice, soothing and assuring.

Toboe sighed and closed his eyes, leaning back into his chest and arms. He could feel Tsume's strong body against his back and it made him felt safe, as it had before. That sweet musk filled his nostrils once more, mixed with the scent of water and he recalled the first time they had kissed in that alleyway. He had felt so protected then, so secure in this man's arms.

Why couldn't it go back to the way it was?

…Because it couldn't. Could it?

Toboe opened his eyes when he felt a soapy sponge on his shoulders, his lover squeezing it and running it along him. It stung a little each time it ran over one of his cuts and he would wince. But then he would feel Tsume's free hand pull him closer and he felt calm once more. He did find himself relaxing with the warm water against his skin and the scent of the soap.

"Sit up," Tsume told him and he did so, letting the man wash his back. The boy pulled his hair aside with one hand, allowing his shoulders to be completely free. It felt so nice to have the warm water graze the back of his neck, dripping down his shoulder blades and collarbone. He found himself smiling, beginning to lose himself within memories of happier times. He was small again, a carefree and happy child whose Gran cared for him, washing his back in a scented bubble bath.

Toboe opened his eyes, losing his smile as he realized those moments no longer existed. He felt the sponge leave him, the man's arms fully around him now and pulling him back into that strong embrace. He allowed it, wrapping his arms around Tsume's, also pulling him close. Gazing off, he felt the mate's mark on his left shoulder being softly kissed.

Tsume nuzzled into the boy's neck, tightly hugging onto him. He wanted to stay here and never leave. It was right now that he himself felt safe. He wanted this more than anything else, to feel secure. He wanted peace within his heart and he believed this boy had the power to heal him. He wanted this moment to last forever.

"I love you," he whispered into the boy's neck, closing his eyes as he held onto him.

Toboe's eyes teared up when he heard those words, realizing it was the first time he'd ever heard them. He had dreamed of this moment forever, when Tsume would finally, truly open up to him and let him in. Now was that moment. He could say anything, do anything and Tsume would give in. And now, more than ever, he wanted to say those words back. …But he couldn't.

The older one frowned when there was no reply from the boy in his arms, but he didn't let go. Instead, he closed his eyes and held onto him tighter, not wanting to let him go. He wanted this moment to stop and stay that way, to never fade.

The boy's facial expression did not change as he let the man hold him, finding himself relaxed in the grip of those strong arms. He could feel Tsume's heartbeat against his back and his breathing slow and steady upon his neck. Closing his eyes, he also found himself not wanting to leave this moment. Even though he was immensely hurt by his lover, betrayed and emotionally a wreck, he knew that he still loved him.

As he remained in the arms of his lover, Toboe knew that Tsume was truly trying to repent for his mistakes… He could feel his fear finally fading, the pain subsiding from his body and mind. He wanted this moment to stay the way that it was. Even if only for a minute longer…

But like everything, nothing lasted forever.

It was then that the man felt the boy pulling away from him and he let go of him, reluctantly. Tsume watched as the boy slowly stood up, not saying anything as he climbed out of the bath and found a towel to wrap around himself. He wanted to stand up as well, but instead he waited as he followed the boy's movements to the door.

He could feel the energy in the air and he knew that something didn't make sense. There was something different about Toboe. Was that his fault?

It was then that Toboe turned around, leaning against the door as he looked down. "Tsume," he spoke softly.

"What is it?" the man replied, his tone confused and somewhat angry.

Toboe expected that, but he continued anyway, "I can't be here anymore." He felt tears in his eyes, surprised at the fact he had any left at all. He had cried so much these past two days. He wouldn't look at Tsume, but he could imagine his expression and it upset him even more. The tears began to fall now and he brought his right arm up to cover his face as he cried.

Tsume still sat in the tub, wanting to go to him and take him in his arms once more, but something inside of him told him that he could not. This angered him and he closed his eyes, bringing his knees up to his chest and gritting his teeth. He couldn't help himself and began to speak, "Toboe, I don't want you to-"

"No, Tsume," the boy cut him off, "It's not that I don't want to be here with you... It's not that," he choked out each word, "It's everything. I can't be here… This old apartment, this city, these memories… I want to go… I want to find what we were searching for in the first place…" He cried, clutching the towel against him.

The man still wouldn't look at him, becoming angered as he knew what the boy was getting at. He just sat there with his one arm on his knees, looking down at his blurred reflection in the water that was now growing cold… "I'm not leaving." He muttered, assuming the boy would begin to plead with him. But instead he heard a soft reply, "I didn't expect you to."

Tsume looked up, partly shocked that he would get that answer. The boy now faced him, his hazel eyes meeting his golden ones. Their gazes were frozen for a moment, the tension in the room rising. They were two very different people who had led two very different lives.

The boy wouldn't look away from the man's face, determined that he would not lose this battle. They had spoke of it time and time again and right now, he wasn't going to back down. He was tired of giving in and running away. There was only so much room for him to bend before he was broken. And he would not be broken, not ever again.

The man finally looked away, letting the boy's stare win the fight. "Fine," he spat, "Do what you want." He immediately regretted his words and bit his lip, expecting that he had hurt the kid once again. He worriedly looked back at the boy but wasn't able to catch a glimpse of his face as he had turned around and opened the door to leave.

"Toboe, wait!" he called out, reaching out to him.

The boy stopped and stood there for a moment, the door open as he was about to leave. He slowly turned around, Tsume noticing the tears on his cheeks and a small smile on his face. "I know, Tsume." He spoke softly, "I know."

The man couldn't say anything or do anything. He just watched as the boy turned back around and left, closing the door behind him. He clenched his fist after he'd gone, closing his eyes in frustration.

…

The boy bit his lip as he leaned back against the closed bathroom door, a tear rolling down his cheeks. This was it, wasn't it? He couldn't wait any longer.

With that he shook off his tears and hurriedly ran down the hallway and into his room. He threw off the towel and went to his dresser, finding clothes to dress himself. He also went to his closet and pulled out an old green backpack, setting it on his bed. He proceeded to pack a few more articles of clothing and when he was finished he left his bedroom and headed for the living room. In the kitchen he found a half loaf of bread and some cheese and apples from the fridge, also stuffing them into his bag.

He then opened one of the kitchen drawers, pulling out items along with a couple of checkbooks and threw them on the table. He only took one, leaving the other remaining there opened, a pen next to it hoping that Tsume would realize it was for him. It was that moment that he stopped and thought. Even now he was still looking out for the man. Was that really ok?

Yes. He shook his head, continuing what he was doing.

The boy grabbed his backpack and headed for the front door. He stopped to slip on his boots by the sofa, sitting on the edge as he laced them up. He bit his lip as he did so, tears returning to him as he realized the decision he'd made. This really was it.

When he stood up, his bag in hand, he noticed the old book on the rug and picked it up, placing it into his bag.

Facing the door, he paused, thinking of his lover once more. By now, he had expected him to come through that bathroom door and try to make him stay... But he hadn't... Was it that he didn't care? He didn't know why Tsume hadn't come after him.

Part of him was saddened by this fact… But the other part was relieved.

He opened the door, not knowing that Tsume now stood in front of the bathroom mirror. He had been listening as the boy moved about to quickly gather his things. Gazing down at his firm grip on the bathroom sink, the man's expression did not hold anger any longer, but regret and sadness.

The boy looked back once more, not knowing he was in the man's thoughts. "I'm sorry," He whispered sadly, opening the door.

The man listened as the door opened and he closed his eyes, imagining his lover standing there, waiting for him to run out after him. But he couldn't. He had to let him go. This was the decision that he had made. He couldn't stop him from going. The kid wanted to be free, free of this place and free of him. And the one thing he could do for him was just that. He loved him too much to keep him here.

The boy smiled faintly, tears still in his eyes as a quick memory of his lover flashed through his mind. He gripped onto the doorknob, holding the backpack over his shoulder as he stepped outside.

"Goodbye, Tsume."

And with that, the door closed.

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><p>; _ ; Reviews? …sob.<p> 


	17. Chapter 17

Here we are again! :) …That's all I have to say. Enjoy!

FYI: If you prefer the "uncut" version, please check out adult fanfiction dot net or deviant art.

Caution: Further chapters will contain mature content such as language and yaoi, Tsume/Toboe. Be forewarned.

Disclaimer: I do not own the characters or series of Wolf's Rain. They belong to BONES & Keiko Nobumoto. This story is non-profit for my own and others' enjoyment. Thank you. :)

**Surrounded**

The morning sounds of the city were as loud as ever, people standing and waiting, arriving and leaving as trains came and left. There was a roof that hung high above the train station, the iron rods designed in intricate details to allow the sun to shine through the cracks. Rain dripped down occasionally, left over from the night before. It was crowded, a sea of people thick as they moved along, carrying their belongings as attendants helped to load the trains with their luggage.

A woman ran by, her suitcase in hand, desperately holding onto it as she tried to make her train. "Wait!" she shouted to a passenger assistant up ahead who was just about to close the door. Her expression was thankful when she saw that he had stopped, waiting until she arrived and helped her onto the train.

The boy looked up when this happened, watching the scene with a melancholy demeanor. He found himself sitting on a green bench among other travelers, patiently waiting to board their train. He sat slumped over, his elbows on his thighs as he examined his hands. They seemed so dry and weathered, even though he was young. Sighing, he brought one of his hands up to rest his head.

He frowned, impatient that he had been sitting there for several hours now. Looking up to the station's large clock above the trains, he realized that it was almost noon. He was becoming more anxious as each minute passed. He couldn't remember how many times he had checked that clock. His train would arrive soon and he would finally be able to leave this city forever.

The boy's thoughts were still running from what he'd done earlier that morning. Aside from checking the station clock every few minutes or so, he found himself looking out the way he had come, out from under the roof and into the rest of the city. He kept wondering if he would see him there. Would he come after him, make him stay? Or would he decide to go with him on his search?

He hated to admit it, but most of him didn't want that. As much as it hurt, as much as he felt alone, he needed to be that way. He needed to find himself and that was away from the man he loved… the man who had hurt him.

Could he even trust him anymore?

And then another thought occurred to him. Would he ever see him again?

The boy's eyes widened and he sat up at the realization of the facts. He had said goodbye, hadn't he? There was no, "See you later!" or "Until next time!"… Would there even be a next time?

He shook his head when he found tears in his eyes, wanting to not face reality. But he had to. He had to be strong. He was worthy of so much more than what he had limited himself to. And even then, when he had taken that chance and ran after the man on the motorcycle that night, he knew now that he had to be brave as he had then. He didn't know what lay before him. But if he never took that chance, then he would never know.

What would paradise hold for him?

Would the others be there, waiting for him? Were they already searching? Did they even remember yet?

He had recalled that it was Blue that one morning who he saw leaving the bookstore. Those eyes of hers were unforgettable. If he had only known, he would have stopped her. She would've wanted to find everyone else, wouldn't she? He was sure that Kiba and Hige would also have believed the same way. They all needed to be together again and finally complete their journey.

Why couldn't Tsume accept that?

Some things never changed, did they?

If Kiba were here, things would be different. He always had a way of getting Tsume going, inspiring him to keep moving, to want something more out of life. He knew what to say every time.

But he wasn't here. And the boy couldn't do it. It just wasn't going to happen.

He sat back, closing his eyes as he leaned against the wall behind the bench. Opening his eyes once more as he sighed, he looked to the sky showing through the details of the roof. A bird flew overhead, blocking flashes of the sunlight in his eyes. His mind continued to wander, lost in thought as the clock's small hand grew closer to the twelve.

"Twelve O'Clock departure for Garrison!" a man yelled, waking the boy out of his dream world.

He stood up and slung his backpack over his shoulder as the others next to him gathered their belongings to board the train. As he began walking to the train, thirty feet or so in front of him, he found his stomach tied up in knots. He was anxious, scared and unsure of everything that was ahead of him.

He had searched his heart that morning as he walked across town, not even knowing where to start or where to go. The only direction that had repeated itself in his mind was "west". Is that where Cheza's flower had come from, a seed at one time floating along the breeze and finding itself within the city he was leaving?

The boy found himself in a long line of people waiting to board, watching as each passenger in front of him checked their luggage in with the attendants. Loud voices were thrown back and forth among the workers, shouting commands over the sound of the heavy engines.

He felt so brave as he stood there waiting among the rest of the crowd. And yet… he felt very much alone.

Looking out across the train station, figures passing back and forth, he noticed something… or rather someone. It was only a quick flash but he knew that it had to be. It wasn't a mistake. He knew it.

_Kiba!_

His heart began to beat faster and his body froze, staring unbelievably in the spot his old friend had been standing. Could it really be?

In that moment he dropped his backpack, leaving the line of boarding passengers and ran after him. He had gone out of his sight but he was sure that he could catch him and make him remember. Unless he already had! Why was he here? He wasn't looking for him, was he?

The boy pushed through the thick crowd, desperate to find the white wolf.

He began to lose hope, unsure if he had really even seen him or not. He was just being wishful, not wanting to be alone on this journey… But as soon as he cleared past another crowd, he saw him about twenty feet off, away from him.

"Kiba!" he called out, hoping that he would hear him but he did not. The crowds, the train station… everything was too loud.

The boy began to run after him, trying to squeeze past the many people going the opposite way of him, stopping him from reaching his friend. "KIBA!" he yelled into the crowd, this time much louder. He grew more anxious, his breathing faster as he realized he was losing him. The sea of people was becoming worse as the twelve o'clock arrivals and departures had begun. And now the boy was lost. He would miss his train if he didn't hurry… Was it worth it?

"No!" he shouted, wanting to change into a wolf. If he could only do that, he could catch up to him faster. And then everything would be the way that it used to be...

Finally, the boy found himself standing in a clearing, searching left and right for where his companion might have gone. He kept calling his name, dodging in and out of crowds to try and find him. And then, he saw him, just standing there. Was it him?

"Kiba!" he called, running over to him.

As soon as he touched his arm, the man turned around to face him. The boy's joyful expression soon changed to embarrassment when he realized the mistake he'd made. Withdrawing his hand, he looked down to the ground. "I-I'm sorry," he apologized, "I thought you were someone else." He looked back up when the man didn't say anything. Rather, he ignored the boy and walked away.

The boy grumbled to himself, his embarrassment now turning to anger. If only it had been his friend… Everything would have turned out so differently. He wouldn't have to leave. He wouldn't have to walk away from everything…

But instead of wallowing in grief, he shrugged off his mistake. As he turned around, he hoped he was at least able to make it back to his train in time. This journey in front of him was the decision that he'd made. And if the others happened to follow, then that was fine with him too.

…

The sunlight glared into the boy's eyes when the bus's door finally opened. He held an arm over his face to shield it from the burning sun, but it was not enough. Stepping off of the bus, he looked around at his surroundings as the other passengers followed. There was nothing but dirt and red hills and occasionally a bit of green weeds around the small town at which they'd pulled over. Where on earth was he?

It had already been a week since he'd set out on this trip. He'd switched from train to train as each one took him further west. But there were only so many stops and only so far the trains were able to go. At this point he'd moved on to buses, staying at dingy motels the nights in between. Instead of trying to meet new interesting people along the way like the old him might have done in the past, he just kept to himself the entire time.

What was the point of forming new friendships?

That wasn't what he wanted. And besides, he had too much on his mind that wasn't worthy sharing. It seemed that everyone around him had something to say, some story to tell. He couldn't do that. He couldn't be like them. He was different from the rest of them.

As he walked away from the bus stop, his stomach growled and he frowned, instinctively clutching onto his belly. Sighing, he looked around at the small town in front of him that wasn't offering much. But then, he noticed a diner of some sort that stood a block down from where he was. That was it. Really, that was it.

He nodded to himself, slung his backpack over his shoulder and began to walk in that direction. He could feel the heat of the sun burning through his jean jacket and frowned. As he made his way to the restaurant, he slipped if off, feeling much better with only the red t-shirt underneath.

When he entered the diner, he saw that it was full of people, a few of them from the bus he'd rode in on. He quickly decided on a free seat at the bar in front of him, seeing that other people were still arriving and he needed to secure a spot. He was too hungry to wait.

As soon as he sat down, an older waitress placed a menu in front of him and walked away, keeping busy with the many customers. It didn't take him long before he had ordered, the food was served and completely devoured soon thereafter. The boy sat back in the barstool and sighed, his stomach full and bloated. He already felt very tired from the heavy meal he'd eaten. Slouching back over the counter and looking at the clock above, he saw that it was already close to six.

He wondered, there were probably no more buses leaving tonight and it would be another motel, yet again. From the corner of his eye, he then saw his waitress coming over to him, the bill in hand. As she sat it down in front of him, the boy reached into his backpack, grabbing his checkbook.

The woman quickly noticed and responded, "Uh, no, no. It's cash only." She pointed at the sign hanging on the wall behind her. Slipping the checkbook back into his bag, the boy frowned, hoping to reason with her. "I have a card-"

"No, cash only." She cut him off.

"But this is all that I have!" He replied. When there was no answer, he found his own solution. "Well, do you have an ATM? Or where is the closest bank?"

"No ATM. And sorry honey, but it's Sunday. The bank is closed." The woman crossed her arms, obviously beginning to think about her own solution to the current predicament.

The boy could feel his stomach rumbling, either from the food digesting or stress. He opened his mouth to reply once more, not sure of what he would say. He was stopped by the man who was sitting next to him, "It's on me, kid." He spoke.

The waitress nodded, seeing that the man was still working on his meal and walked away to attend to her other customers.

The boy looked to his right as the man continued eating the food on his plate, slowly chewing each bite. He had dark hair, about shoulder length, olive skin and blue eyes. He hadn't even noticed him sitting there before. "Thank you, I owe you one!" the boy spoke to him, leaning in his direction.

"You don't owe me anything," the man replied between bites, "After today, you'll never see me again."

"Oh," the boy blushed, "I guess you're right. Sorry about that…"

"No worries… Do you want more food? If I'm buying you might as well get your fill. The way you chowed down a minute ago tells me it's rare that you get to eat like that." He offered.

"W-what? No…" the boy looked down, "I've been busy, that's all. Not much time to eat I suppose…" He spoke sadly but then quickly looked back up, changing his tone, "I don't need anything else, thank you."

At first he didn't think the man heard him because he signaled the waitress over to them, "Ma'am," he spoke, "two slices of pie please. How about banana and… what do you want?" He turned to the boy who just sat there looking shocked.

When the boy didn't say anything the man turned back to the waitress, "Two bananas, please."

The waitress nodded as she wrote on her notepad and disappeared once more. The man turned back to the boy, "What's wrong with you, kid?" he asked.

The boy didn't answer at first because the man's tone seemed angry. He wanted to say something, but the guy just sat there frowning at him. But he wouldn't look away, and then the man let go of the stare and started laughing. The boy couldn't believe this act, "W-what's wrong with me? …What's wrong with you?"

The man stopped and sat back in his chair, closing his eyes and smiling to himself. "You remind me of someone… You're too nice." He opened his eyes again, looking at the boy, "What's your name?" he chuckled.

"T-Toboe." The boy replied, regaining his sanity for a moment as he sat back in his chair. "And you?"

"Keith. So tell me, Toboe…" he paused, "What's a kid like you doing out here in the middle of nowhere all by yourself? …You are alone, right?"

"Just you saying that sounds creepy," he answered, immediately catching himself for the accusing tone, "I mean, well… Yes, I'm alone." He straightened his back up, finding confidence within himself. "I'm traveling somewhere."

The man frowned, "Where to? …You know, you're kinda young to be traveling alone. That's dangerous for a kid your age."

"I'm not a kid!" Toboe snapped.

"Really, now? How old are you?" Keith sneered.

"…Sixteen." The boy replied, watching the man smirk and close his eyes again, having proved his point. "B-But I'll be seventeen in a couple of months!" He didn't get a reply that time either. It wasn't long before the waitress returned, bringing out their desserts. Toboe thanked her when she sat his in front of him, picking up a fork. And then he remembered, turning to his new friend, "And you too, thank you for everything… really."

"Like I said, no worries, kid." He leaned over and took a sip of his coffee right before taking a bite of the pie. After he swallowed he smiled, looking off distantly. "You really are like her," he spoke, "At least before I ruined her..."

"What? Like who?" Toboe hadn't caught that last part, as it was just a mutter.

The man sat back, holding his coffee. "My sister…" he spoke half-heartedly before he changed his tone, "She's gullible like you."

"Hey!" Toboe replied, "I'm not gullible!"

"What makes you think that?" Keith shot back, "You travel alone thinking you'll be perfectly all right like there's no worries in this world. You accept a gift from a stranger and then you talk to him like he's your friend." The man seemed to grow angrier with each word. The boy found it odd.

"You shouldn't trust me, kid. I'm dangerous." He finished, looking away from him.

"That's not true," Toboe replied, "You were kind to buy me food when I couldn't. And you kept me company when I was lonely…"

The man looked back at him, surprised at the response he received. And then he looked away once more, taking another bite of pie. His face grew relaxed and he sighed, "You know what your problem is, Toboe?" The boy didn't reply, so he continued, "I think you're the type that sees the good in everybody… even when it's not there... Am I right?"

Toboe looked down, thinking about what the man had just said. It was true, wasn't it? Was that the problem he had with Tsume? Was there really no good in him at all? And then he realized where his mind had drifted and he shook his head, not wanting to thinking about the man he'd left behind.

"It's gonna get dark here soon, kid. You better find some place to stay for the night."

The boy looked back up, seeing that the man was now standing, beginning to gather his things. He sat a wad of bills on the counter and stepped back, turned and began to walk away before he was called after, "Wait!" Toboe spoke, "Where are you going?"

"What's it look like?" he answered, turning back around to face the boy, "I'm leaving town. …See ya!" And with that, he walked out of the diner.

Toboe turned back to the counter, looking at the half-eaten piece of pie sitting in front of him. It was getting late, wasn't it? And he couldn't eat any more. He really was stuffed. He gestured to the waitress who stood a few feet away from him, "Where is the closest motel?" he asked.

"Bailey's, it's two streets west of here. Can't miss it." The boy nodded and stood up, thanking her before walking out of the restaurant.

When he was outside, he looked around, curious as to where that man had gone. But he wasn't anywhere to be seen. So instead of standing there, he strapped his backpack on and headed west. It was sure enough that he was headed in the right direction when he saw a lit sign that read "Bailey's" not too far off.

It wasn't long before he arrived there and entered the front door. He waited at the counter as he looked back at the setting sun. He couldn't believe how dark it was getting already. "Yes, son?" a man spoke.

Toboe turned around and smiled, pushing his card forward on the counter. "I need a room for the night, please."

"Oh, no I'm sorry… We're full up." The man replied.

"What, really?" the boy asked worriedly.

"Yes, a lot of passerby's this week it seems. I could call to the next town, it's fifty miles from here." He began to reach for the phone next to him.

"There's no other motels in this town?" the boy replied.

"No, I'm sorry. Do you want me to call?" he picked up the phone, beginning to dial.

"Not unless you can give me a ride," Toboe hated to be rude, but he was tired and aggravated.

"No can do, I don't have a car. No cabs, either. Sorry." The man rubbed the back of his bald head, smiling.

The boy growled, "Then what was the point even mentioning the other motel if I can't even get there?"

"Well I didn't know if you had a car or not-"

"Whatever. Thanks." Toboe walked out the door and into the night, the sun almost completely gone. The lights overhead had gone on, bugs already beginning to fly around the alluring glow. The boy frowned, wanting to cry but knew that he couldn't. There was no use in that.

He eventually found a park bench that was near the bus stop. Looking around for other options, he realized that this was it. Yes, it was dangerous. But what choice did he have?

He frowned then, feeling guilty for the way he had treated that man at the motel. It's just that he was tired and frustrated. Getting a free meal was nice, but he also hadn't enjoyed that man picking apart his personality. He didn't know him. And now, he didn't even know why he was so upset…

It was different than the times Tsume would tease him. He didn't mind that as much but… he really didn't like it. It made him feel insecure. And now he was growing sad again… He just needed to get some sleep. Tomorrow would be better.

Luckily, he had a blanket in his bag, which he pulled out, trying to make the best of the situation. Wrapping it around himself, he laid down on the hard bench, attempting to get comfortable. Closing his eyes, he tried to get some sleep. The morning would come soon and he would begin again on his search for paradise.

…

The sound of the red wolf's feet beat steadily upon the ground, his breathing fast. His eyes glowed in the night, jotting from left to right as he ran. He was searching desperately for anywhere, somewhere to hide. A gunshot echoed behind him in the distance and he panted faster, knowing that they were getting closer and closer.

He did not know what his next move would be, only that he needed to keep running. Everything around him was whizzing by faster and faster as he closed his eyes and whined, knowing it was no use. It was only a matter of time…

…

The boy's eyes flew open at the feeling of his hand being clamped down upon by something sharp. He yelled in pain, sitting up on the wooden bench, the blanket falling off of him. He began to immediately look around, trying to recollect his thoughts. It was dark still with no signs of the sun coming up any time soon. How long had he been asleep?

He could feel that he was being watched. And then he noticed something standing off a few feet in the distance. It was large, its fur silver and white with eyes that glowed in the black of the night.

It was a wolf.

"W-what?" he breathed.

It just stood there, staring at him for what seemed forever, their gazes locked. And then, it began to walk away from him.

The boy didn't understand… but he wanted to. He immediately stood up, reaching out to the animal, now twenty feet away from him. "Wait!" he called after it.

It stopped and looked back at him, standing only for a minute before it took off.

"No… NO!" He yelled, grabbing his backpack and taking off after the beast. He ran as fast as he could, trying to keep up. Why was this happening to him? Was this… could this possibly be his fate?

The boy didn't even realize, but he had strayed far from the town in pursuit of the wolf. The only light to guide him was from the moon overhead, almost full and glowing against the dark night sky.

It wasn't long before he stopped, bending over and dropping his backpack on the ground. He clutched his knees, trying to regain his energy. "No…" he breathed, "Wait…" He was sure that he'd lost the wolf forever now. It was gone. This whole thing was pointless. He would have to walk all the way back to the town.

The boy stood up, looking all around him to try and gather his bearings. And then he became frozen, his eyes widened as he realized the predicament he'd gotten himself into.

He was surrounded by a pack of wolves.

* * *

><p>What will happen next? And what happened to poor Tsume? :O …Reviews, please.<p> 


	18. Chapter 18

My goodness! Can you believe we're at the 19th installment? Well, 18 chapters for the cut version. ^~ It's not that bad really, if you're interested in reading the uncut version. I could have uploaded the story on this site with an M rating, but I wanted more hits so I stuck with the T rating. ...Anyways, I hope you're enjoying it so far. I'm excited about the upcoming chapters too and what is in store for our boys. ;)

FYI: If you prefer the "uncut" version, please check out adult fanfiction dot net or deviant art.

Caution: Further chapters will contain mature content such as language and yaoi, Tsume/Toboe. Be forewarned.

Disclaimer: I do not own the characters or series of Wolf's Rain. They belong to BONES & Keiko Nobumoto. This story is non-profit for my own and others' enjoyment. Thank you. :)

**Sorrow and Decay**

Toboe… Do you remember the day we met? Do you remember the things I said, the things I did? I could never understand why you would always come back to me. I know you said that you saw something in me, that you believed in me, even when I didn't. I always felt so out of place in this world back then. I was nothing more than a lone wolf... But everything changed when I met you…

…

It had been one month and three days since the moment the boy had walked out of his life. He had stood there quietly as he only listened, with all the desires in the world to run after him, but with no power to do so. Was it that he had given up?

Maybe.

But there was a part of him that wanted to let the boy go, to set him free as he knew he longed to be. As much as he would've liked to, he couldn't hold him captive. Even though he seemed docile at times, the kid had an independent spirit, and he couldn't crush that. He admired that about him too much.

He always had. Even though he hated to admit it.

As he stood in the kitchen, stirring a boiling pot of oatmeal, the man sighed to himself. Had it really been that long since Toboe left? And had he really been counting the days?

He looked up, glancing over to the calendar that hung on the wall. Yes, he had counted every single day. And by now, he really had given up it seemed. Each day had played out to be a waiting game, every now and then watching the door, wondering if the boy would simply waltz back into his life. But no. He never had.

There were times he even grew angry, mad at himself for not going after him. Was he a coward?

The man's thoughts were interrupted by the sound of sizzling on the burner. He quickly looked down, grimacing as he noticed the oatmeal was boiling over. Cursing, he pulled the pot off the burner and turned it off. When he began to stir it once more, he saw that it was nearly ruined, burnt to the bottom of the pan. He sat his botched breakfast aside, leaning against the counter behind him with a hand over his eyes.

Why did he always fuck everything up?

He stood there for a moment until his mind began to wander back to the boy once more. Then his stomach growled. Groaning, he stepped over to the fridge and pulled the door open, looking around inside at its contents. Toboe had always been the one to take care of this. What few things he learned from putting together meals, he'd picked up from the kid. He was never good at cooking, aside from just eating a loaf of bread... if that even counted.

Seeing that the fridge was near empty, he grabbed what he found-a carton of cottage cheese. He shrugged, closing the door and going back to the kitchen counter. He pulled open the nearest drawer, finding a spoon to eat. As he did so, he was thankful that his "breakfast" hadn't expired yet. He needed to go grocery shopping, didn't he?

At least he had the day off. Yes, even though he'd missed a few days, he was able to get his job back at the factory. However, he was demoted back to the night shift because of the trouble he'd caused. It was embarrassing, to have to crawl back like that. But he was still thankful that he had the job. Right now he wanted to concentrate on just simply living.

He looked around at his surroundings, standing in that apartment that still felt abandoned since the boy left. A part of him felt that he should've left as well, returning to that worn down building he once called home within the most crime ridden part of the city. But he couldn't. Aside from the part that wanted to leave there, most of him hoped that the boy might return one day. He had even tried to keep it clean as the kid liked it.

Was he hoping for too much?

Maybe it would be best if could just forget it all. The boy was never coming back, was he?

Was this a fact that he had to face? Or worse… had something happened?

No. He couldn't think like that. The kid was fine. He wanted to leave, didn't he? And he had, so who cared? He could take care of himself.

The man frowned, finishing what was left of the cottage cheese. It wasn't his favorite, but he was hungry. Still hungry, in fact. He sighed, sitting the container and spoon in the sink. Deciding that he needed to take advantage of the day, he walked over to the back of the sofa, finding a black tank top. He didn't realize when a smile crossed his lips, imaging the boy sitting there as he had once before.

The boy had been staring at him for a while, his eyes searching him as the man stood there only wearing his jeans. "What are you looking at?" the man finally asked, noticing the look on his face. The boy turned away, blushing. "N-nothing…"

The man smirked, "You like what you see?"

"No!" the boy shot back at him angrily. Then he looked down once more, "It's your scar… or birthmark. I still wonder where you got that."

The man looked away, "It's nothing, really," he looked at the boy again, "Why do you care, Toboe?"

"I'm curious." The boy looked at him and smiled, "I just want… to know all of you." He looked down again, blushing once more.

The man smiled as well, "I'll tell you… one of these days… But for now, grab your jacket and let's go. We gotta go to the market. You're still making me dinner, right?" he asked.

Toboe nodded, "Yes!"

"Well then, c'mon, kid!" The man reached his hand out, the boy jumping up and running to him. As they walked out the door, the man put his arm around him, kissing him on the forehead. "You're too cute." the man commented on the boy's cheerful demeanor.

The boy laughed happily, pushing him away, "Tsume!" he smiled embarrassingly.

The man frowned once more, bringing himself back to the present. He had become angry again, remembering those weeks they had together that seemed like yesterday, still in reach but yet so long ago. He felt like cursing, wanting to slam a fist into the wall next to him but knew that it was no use. Instead he sighed and slipped on the black tank. He also found his boots and put those on too, pulling his blue jeans down over them. That was all he needed. Summer was finally here.

…

As the man walked through the corridors of the market street, he could feel the blistering heat from the sun beating down on his back. The summer days were in full swing and it was very hot. At that moment he felt a little regretful that his arms were bare, knowing that he would most likely get burned. But he didn't care. He was tanned enough that it wouldn't matter that much.

Walking along the busy sidewalk filled with other shoppers, he stopped at different stands to find items to fill his bags. It was mostly bread at first, that being his favorite. But he did happen to pick up some vegetables as well as a large fish, excited to get home and cook it. He was hungry.

As he was munching on a roll when he was about to leave the market, he saw a fruit stand on his way out. He stopped, realizing that his bags weren't completely balanced with all that he needed to fill the apartment's empty fridge. As he was picking a few apples and oranges to buy, he caught a scent that brought familiar memories to his mind. Looking to his left, he noticed a basket filled with peaches, their aroma filling the air with their ripeness. They'd been in season for a while, but now more than ever.

He brought one of the peaches to his nose, breathing it in. It reminded him of Toboe. Not only was the fruit soft like the boy's skin, but it smelt like him too. That figured though. These were the kid's favorite. Every visit they took to the market would always include picking up a few of these. He went ahead and bought a few, adding them to his bag to take home.

As he was walking back towards the apartment moments later, one of bags tore in the bottom, a few of the apples and peaches spilling out. "Shit," he muttered, bending over to pick them up. It was when he rose to his feet, the fruit in hand, that he was caught off guard. What he saw when he looked forward was an all too familiar face passing at the stop light in front of him.

But it wasn't an old friend.

It couldn't be…

Seeing that the man had not seen him, he quickly turned the opposite way, walking faster. His mind began to race, his heart quickening to a panic. What was he doing here? Why…

Yes. He remembered.

It had to be what he'd done not long over a month ago. Why had he taken it so lightly? He ought to have been crazy to think that his problems would just disappear like that. He was a murderer now. And the man that he'd just seen crossing the street had good reason to be here.

It had to be for him

_Shit!_ He thought, walking faster and faster. Before he reached the nearby street corner on his detour, he looked back in the direction he had come, searching for the man. It was crowded, the street full of passerby's and he was nowhere to be seen. Had he lost him? Had he even seen him in the first place?

Surely not.

When he finally made it back to the boy's apartment, he unlocked the door, scrambling quickly to get in. Once he was inside, he shut the door behind him, leaning against it as he dropped the bags of groceries at his feet. He remained standing there for several minutes, lost in thought.

He brought his hand up to cover his face as he frowned in anger. What had he done?

He could be so stupid sometimes, acting out of anger without thinking. He always regretted it and now this was the one of the worst regrets of all. He'd made the decision to protect he and Toboe, but at what cost? And was it the right decision?

No.

It was impulsive. When was he going to get it right? He should have listened to the kid, who wanted to run away. That would have been the easiest and now, the wisest solution. Would they have really followed after them? He was just one man with a debt. Surely there were other scams they had going on. And she was in charge of it all, wasn't she? No… it wasn't just her. It was her brother too.

And now he was here-Keith.

Had he come to collect? Had he come to get revenge? Did he even know that he murdered his sister?

Why had he done that?

Yes, he was betrayed. And she admitted everything. From the start everything had been nothing but lies. She used him, even faked her own death! She even tried to kill him! It was in self defense…

But was that really why?

Maybe it was that he himself wanted revenge… How could he blame her brother for wanting the same?

He shook his head, not wanting to admit the truth as he felt immense guilt over the mistake he'd made. As many excuses as he could come up with, he still couldn't get a complete grasp over the situation. He felt so lost. He couldn't stop thinking about the man. He couldn't stop thinking about her. And what made matters worse, he couldn't stop thinking about Toboe and how he had abused him because of his own selfish behavior.

He didn't know what he was going to do…

…

Hours later the sun was beginning to go down, the sounds of the city grower softer as night began to approach. There was barely any light inside of the apart as the man sat at the kitchen table by himself, a plate with remnants with what had been his dinner sitting in front of him. As he sat there, he held the fork firmly in his right hand, appearing to be lost in thought as he stared at the somewhat empty plate.

His meal had been decent enough. It several hours after he arrived home that he'd decided to fry the fish he'd bought at the market. He had remembered that when Toboe cooked it for him, he used salt and lemon to flavor it… but what else? It wasn't the same.

How he had longed for the kid's version of the dish. And it was so simple to begin with. It was taking him the longest time to remember why it'd been different. Was it because he himself cooked it? Was the pan too hot or too cool? No.

How did the boy know all these things about cooking? He thought for a moment and then recalled him saying that he was raised by his grandmother. That had to be it. It couldn't have been anything else. Cooking that good had to be taught from the time you were little. Toboe's Gran…

He began to feel guilty once more as he remembered the kid talking about her. She died, leaving him as the only member left of his family. And what did he do when the boy told him about it? Well the first time, he ignored it… the second time, he only simply acknowledged it.

Why was he such an asshole?

It made him angry. He wanted to change, to be a better person. Why was it that Toboe could be so caring towards others? …He was very trusting too. If it weren't for that, he may have never even found him again.

He didn't notice, but the man smiled as an image of the boy ran through his head, standing there at the entrance of his work's parking lot. He had ran after him when he saw him pass by, following him and then on top of that, asking for a ride home. He was ballsy, he had to give him that.

But they knew each other, didn't they? …Even though neither of them realized it at that point.

It was so odd that night after he'd dropped the kid off at the apartment. He remembered sitting there as his bike quietly hummed, watching the boy's movements, listening to his every word… His heart longed to be near him even then, all though he didn't know why.

The man sighed and closed his eyes, leaning back in his chair. He wanted to go back to that day and do everything all over again. If only he'd known what the future would have brought, he would have redone every choice all over again. He would have never said the words he'd said. He would have never done the things he'd done.

He slowly opened his eyes, frowning as he realized what was done, was done. He couldn't go back, he couldn't do it over. Everything was lost. And it was all his fault.

He groaned angrily, standing up as he roughly pushed his plate away from him. He bit his lip when the plate slid right off the table and shattered on the floor, growing even angrier as he remembered how quickly his emotions could get out of hand.

The man stood there for a moment, looking at the broken plate on the ground, wondering what he should do about it. It was a few minutes before he decided to pick up the broken pieces, tossing them into the trash under the counter. At least he could do this… he could fix this one single mistake.

After he was finished he stood back up, noticing the glowing orange light from the sun that entered through the living room's window. As he walked over to the front door, he grabbed one of the peaches he'd bought earlier from the fruit bowl on the table. He bit into it as he opened the door, juice trickling down his chin.

It was succulent with sweet flavor, soft and moist. As he chewed and swallowed the bite, he stepped outside, leaning against the side of the open door. The sun was going down for the night, casting beautiful shades of red, orange, purple and yellow in the sky. He bit into the peach again, savoring its sweet taste as he watched the sunset, once more thinking of the boy.

The kid loved watching the sunsets almost every night. He'd said it was something he had loved to do since he was little. He himself wasn't as sensitive as that, finding beauty in nature, so he'd given him a hard time about it. His usual teasing embarrassed him now, feeling guilty for the things he'd said.

As he stood there, eating the peach, relaxing as he watched the sun go down, he realized that there was nothing wrong with that. There was something about finding beauty in the most natural and simplest of things that brought him peace. He found the guilt and anger inside of him subsiding, slowly fading just as the sun was.

It was when he bit into the peach once more that pain came and he cursed, accidentally biting into the pit. It made him so angry that he growled, biting his lip and hurling the fruit onto the cement. He watched it collide with the hard pavement, parts of the peach's flesh flying off at the impact. He was frustrated that he hadn't been paying attention when he hurt his jaw.

An image flashed into his mind when he did this, recalling a past event when he'd thrown that leftover sandwich at the kid, it hitting the ground in the same fashion that the peach had. It was from his past life, when Toboe had first had the guts to tag along after him. Even then, he'd been so cold.

He began to relax again, realizing that he was falling back into old habits. The peach lay on the ground in remnants, the pit still intact of course. The kid was so much like that peach, he thought. He recalled his the bruises on his skin the morning he left, the man's guilt returning to him. But the boy was still filled with determination that day, facing the man who had hurt him. He seemed so soft on the outside, but inside he held such strength. He really had grown. He'd even had the guts to stand up to him, even to the point of leaving him behind.

He wondered how he was doing now. It had been so long... Was he safe? …Where was he?

The man frowned, looking out to the sunset once more.

He needed a drink.

…

The sun had almost completely gone down in the sky as the man drove up to his destination. Pulling over, he parked the motorcycle and got off onto the sidewalk. He stood there for a moment after he took off his helmet, glancing at the sunset once more. Just as his thoughts were about to overwhelm him again, he shook his head and groaned.

He dismissed any thoughts of the kid that had begun to curve their way into his mind as he walked past a bustling crowd. A few obvious friends stood together in front of the bar, talking and laughing together. It made him frown. No matter what, it had always angered him to see others around him so carefree. Was he jealous? Maybe.

He paused as the bar's door swung open, a few others leaving while they spoke their conversations. Rolling his eyes, he walked in, stopping in the entryway to look around. The bar was lively and noisy, filled with people sitting at booths and tables while others played pool or darts. Was this a good choice? Maybe it would've been easier to take a trip to the liquor store and drink himself to sleep at home?

He shrugged. It didn't matter. Here was here now, wasn't he?

Seeing a free seat at the bar, he made his way through the crowd, sitting down when he finally got there. He sighed to himself, leaning into the bar as he relaxed himself on the stool. A woman promptly made her way over to him, most likely seeing that he was in distress and thinking that he would probably be a good customer. She smiled, trying to catch his eye, "What can I get for ya?"

The man glanced up at her, his expression troubled, "Anything to get me drunk."

She laughed, "Coming right up!" and grabbed a bottle and a shot glass from behind the counter. She quickly poured the drink and sat in front of him. Picking it up, he examined the clear golden liquor for a moment. And with that, he threw his head back along with the drink, gulping it down. He caught his breath at the dryness of it, slamming the glass back onto the counter. He paused before continuing, "Again," He muttered.

"Gladly," the bartender nodded as she poured him another. He quickly drank that as well, nodding to her for a refill when he was finished. After that, the woman sat the bottle down next to him. "How's about I just leave it here?" she asked.

"That's an idea." The man smirked, swallowing another glass. The woman frowned at the rude remark before shrugging and going off to help another customer.

As he began to pour himself another drink, he heard someone say, "Getting drunk, are we?" He looked up, noticing a man who sat a few feet over, no others sitting in the seats between them. He quickly realized who it was, his heart stopping and his eyes widening. He didn't say anything, rather looked down to his drink, debating whether to finish it or not. Should he run?

"Well… so am I." the other man continued. "Wait…" he paused, thinking, "I know you!" He looked over to him now, smiling right before he took another gulp of his beer. He had other empty glasses in front of him, shot sizes and larger. He had obviously been here for a while.

The first man finally decided to speak up, "Keith, it's been a long time." He faked a rough smile, not sure what was going to happen. Did he know?

"Yeah, too long… H-how long, do ya think?" The man stood up from across the bar, still holding onto his mug. He slowly made his way over to him, stumbling before he filled the empty seat next to him. Tsume was frozen, but he could smell the alcohol on his breath. He was loaded with it. This somehow made him relax, even if just a little. "I don't know, three years or so?"

"Th-three years? Really?" he leaned in next to him, wrapping an arm around him. Tsume tensed up at Keith's touch, listening to him as he continued, "Whats wrong?" he asked, letting go of the uncomfortable man. "It's been so loooooong… I'd think you'd be excited to see me!" he laughed a little, turning away from him and leaning back in his seat. He took another gulp of his beer, his smile soon fading to a frown.

Keith then leaned forward, resting his head on his left arm and looking over at Tsume who remained there sitting still. "Seriously… I can't believe you're here, of all people. Who would've guessed?" He turned away from him and took another sip, "So tell me, how've you been?" he asked, staring vacantly at the mirror behind the bar, watching he and his old friend's reflection.

Tsume was beginning to grow angry at the man's attitude. Did he seriously not know what had happened? And what was with this small talk? He'd left him with his debt and took off after his sister allegedly died. How could he be so carefree, acting like he was running into an old pal? This wasn't some fucking reunion.

As his anger worsened, he began to feel his logic disappear as well. This worried him, as a part of him was afraid that if he said anything, he'd be in serious trouble. And the larger part of him wanted to call Keith on his shit. But then Danielle reappeared in his mind, this man's sister and his own former lover, who he'd murdered.

"I'm fine, just working a lot," Tsume finally answered. He lifted the shot glass in front of him and drank the liquor he'd recently poured himself. _This is it_, he thought. He had to be careful, now that the way things were beginning to play out. All he had to do now was relax and look for a quick way out. _Dammit_, he thought once more. Why didn't he leave this town when he had the chance? He'd be with the kid and away from this hellhole. What the fuck was wrong with him?

"What about you?" Tsume asked him, immediately regretting the question when Keith answered, "I'm looking for someone." He took another drink, emptying the last of the mug's cold liquid. Sitting down his empty drink, he waved at the bartender who quickly came over to refill his beer. Tsume watched as she did so, wondering where Keith was going with this conversation. It was driving him insane, wondering if he really knew the truth, the horrible mistake he'd made over a month ago.

As he ran through these thoughts, he noticed the television mounted behind the bar. If he didn't feel dead already, the news was on and it was airing an all too familiar story. He watched the screen, frozen as he wondered if Keith was watching too. But he couldn't look at him.

Tsume watched as the bartender left them, images of the warehouse district flashing on the screen as a woman narrated them, "…Police are still looking for the suspect or suspects involved in the warehouse murders that took place over a month ago at Marco's Lumber Supply Company." Photos appeared of a woman and four men. "The victims- Danielle Stallins, Kevin William, Jake Mull, Sanji Satou and Ryan Davis were brutally murdered, their bodies discovered the following day by the lumber company's workers." The screen went to interviews with the workers, each saying a few things about their involvement and how hideous the scene was.

Tsume could feel his blood rushing into his face and even though he felt frozen, he managed to glance over at Keith, wanting to see his reaction. He was just plainly watching the television as he took another sip of his drink. Tsume couldn't believe this. He didn't even look upset! He just sat there with a blank expression on his face as he stared at the screen. His sister's death was being reported on the tv! What the hell was wrong with him?

The news then flashed back to the anchorman, "Thank you Carrie. How upsetting… We are re-airing this story because of the recent witness that came forward. A local teenager, we will not give her name… claims that she and friends were in the area when they saw a man fleeing the warehouse that night who was covered in blood. The police have this detailed sketch on who they believe to be the perpetrator of these crimes." A drawn image of who appeared to be Tsume was now shown on the screen as the anchorman continued, "The police believe this man had a dog with him because of a few wounds found on the victims. If you have any…"

The television's report began to fade off into the distance as Tsume's focus was now on someone else. He was frozen as he began to push his seat away from the bar as he watched Keith slowly turn to face him. His expression was now intense with anger as he looked back at him, breathing heavily as he also pushed his seat back.

"Y-You… YOU FUCKING BASTARD!" he screamed at the top of his lungs, Tsume taking that moment to quickly dart from his seat. He desperately pushed through the crowd who had stopped to watch the scene. He could hear Keith's stool fall on the floor, knowing that he was quickly coming after him.

He ran through the front door, accidentally knocking over a couple who yelled at him as they landed on the sidewalk. Leaping onto his bike and quickly revving it up, he saw Keith running and stumbling out of the bar just as he took off.

Tsume drove as fast as he could down the street, thankful that rush hour had passed. The moon had begun to take the sun's place, the street lamps lit up and the other vehicle's headlights glowing. At first he wasn't sure which direction he'd taken off in, and tried to get his bearings down so he knew which way he would go to get back to the apartment. He then noticed that he was missing his helmet, which he'd left at the bar. He could just get another one soon. It would be no trouble as long as he didn't get into a wreck before then.

No sooner did these thoughts run through his mind, did he begin to hear a low humming that was getting closer. He quickly glanced back as the sound grew louder. It was Keith! He too was on a motorcycle and was fast on his heels.

"SHIT!" Tsume cursed out loud, hitting the gas harder. He didn't expect this!

He found himself quickly swerving through the streets, dodging in and out of the honking traffic. He could hear the engine on the motorcycle behind him revving up and getting closer. He knew that Keith was moving as quickly as he could to keep up with him. He could feel his heart beating quickly, his pulse quickening as the noise of Keith's bike grew louder.

He couldn't go back to the apartment now! He'd find him for sure. And what if Toboe came back for him? Toboe…

Tsume growled, looking back again as Keith and his bike moved closer, cutting off a moving truck that blared its horn at him. He could see his face now, no helmet on his head as his long hair flew back, his eyes wild with intense hatred as he glared back at him. Keith leaned into his bike then, advancing on him.

Tsume bit his lip and looked back ahead, noticing that he'd made his way onto the freeway. It wasn't long before his heart jumped, seeing a clearing in the road just a few cars in front of him. Once he made it to that point, he could go at full speed and take off, hopefully leaving Keith far behind him. He quickly swerved to the left, barely making it as he cut off a small car.

_Shit!_ He thought, immediately dodging another car.

That was it! He'd made it past the few vehicles and into the clearing. He then went full throttle, hoping that his bike could hold out long enough. He quickly moved straight forward, his motorcycle going at full speed. Just when he thought he'd made it far enough away, he heard Keith again, moving closer and closer.

Dammit! He was drunk! How could he make it this far? Was he that determined?

Tsume bit his lip, praying to God that something, anything would set Keith back and he could get away at least for now. Everything was happening way too fast!

When had his life changed like this so dramatically? …It was the kid. If he'd never met him… no. He couldn't think like that. This was bound to happen, one way or the other.

Just then he could feel his bike giving out a little and he knew he had to cool it down. It couldn't keep going at this pace. Tsume regrettably slowed down, hearing Keith approaching him. He then glanced to his right, seeing him at his side. He bit his lip as the man suddenly swerved into him, just barely dodging the collision.

"YOU'RE FUCKING CRAZY!" Tsume instinctively shouted at him.

"PULL OVER!" Keith hollered back.

Tsume didn't want to. But he knew he had to. He knew Keith all too well. He was determined even back when they were kids. And he wouldn't let up until he had his way. At this point, he was going to kill them both!

This was the end of the road… quite literally.

Tsume began to let go of the accelerator, his bike slowing. But just when he thought it was over, it was in that moment that he noticed Keith's bike giving up on him. He glanced over at him, surprised as he saw Keith's face in shock. It was then that the man's bike stopped all together, giving Tsume the opportunity to take off once more.

And so he did, just as the man pulled a gun from his pocket and shot in his direction. "DAMMIT! YOU FUCKER!" Keith screamed wildly as he shot after him. But it was no use as Tsume's bike took him faster, the man's screams fading away from him, "I'LL FIND YOU! YOU'RE GONNA DIE! DO YOU HEAR ME? I WILL FIND YOU! "

Tsume frowned at the threats, knowing that it was inevitable but at least he'd bought himself some time for now. He kept driving as fast his bike would take him into the night, several minutes passing by. All that was behind him was the city, lit up and in front of him was the dark road leading away, few cars here and there.

And then, without warning, he thought of Toboe again. The image suddenly brought to his mind was from his past life when he'd first found him in that alleyway. He was shocked as he looked up at him, "Y-you're… you're like me…"

Tsume couldn't help but smile. And even though he had good reason to be angry, he could feel the bitter emotions fading away from his heart. It was a matter of letting go, wasn't it? From the time he was a child, never knowing his parents, going from home to home and town to town, the anger had become a part of him. Even in his last life…

It was the same story all over again. It was so hard for him to trust. He truly was a lone wolf. He'd even traded in being a part of his first pack for a quick escape. That was the reason he had this scar. It was who he was. He held himself so proudly, but he was a coward. He was then… and he was now.

But he couldn't hold onto that any longer, it had to change. When was he going to start living? It was tearing his life apart. He couldn't keep doing this. His anger only brought more anger, the hatred, more hatred and the violence, more violence. It had to end.

And letting go of this town was just the beginning. He didn't know where he was headed. Only that it was away from here, this city full of nothing but sorrow and decay.

* * *

><p>:D Reviews? I'd love some interesting thoughts on everything's that happened up until now and what might be to come. Stay tuned for the next chapter! ;p<p> 


	19. Chapter 19

Okay, here's the next one for ya! The big 2-0! Well, 19 for ff dot net users. ^~ It was going to be much longer but then it got tooooo long. So I had to break up the chapter. Which means… the other should be out soon! :D Also, for those not on DeviantArt, you should check it out because I'm probably going to upload some "delicious" fanart if you get my drift. ;) :) Enjoy!

FYI: If you prefer the "uncut" version, please visit adultfanfiction dot net or deviant art.

Caution: Further chapters will contain mature content such as language and yaoi, Tsume/Toboe. Be forewarned.

Disclaimer: I do not own the characters or series of Wolf's Rain. They belong to BONES & Keiko Nobumoto. This story is non-profit for my own and others' enjoyment. Thank you. :)

Red Fur

The moon was dimly lit that night, a couple of days away from when the moon had been full. The desert night was cold and still, nothing but dirt, a few dry brush, canyons and plateaus within the distance that surrounded the figures. The boy stood there frozen, his heavy breathing fogging the air as he looked around him. His heart was beginning to beat faster as he found that he was completely circled by several wolves.

He couldn't help but wonder if they were in the least bit like him. Or maybe that was just wishful thinking? Nothing was ever that easy. No, these were wild animals, at least ten of them. He felt so helpless and at the same time stupid for being lured away like that. He looked around, quickly glancing at each of them, looking for the silver and white wolf, but it was not there.

What had he done? He was in the middle of nowhere, the old town a ways off. He couldn't see it in the distance now. And he didn't even know which direction he had come from. How long had he been out here looking for that other wolf?

It was then that one of the wolves began to growl at him, holding itself in a readying attack stance. A few of the others soon followed this suit, their hackles raised as they viciously snarled at him. Did he even have a chance to run? And what good would it do? They'd just chase after him and take him down.

The boy yelped and lost his footing when a black one suddenly lunged closer and snapped its teeth at him. It caused him to fall back on his rear, crying out in pain when he hit a sharp rock that cut into his left thigh. He instinctively grabbed onto the wound but realized that he didn't have time to focus on that. He quickly looked back up in horror as the wolves moved in, advancing toward him as they hungrily growled, their sharp teeth gleaming in the moonlight.

This was it, the end of the road. No more Paradise. He would never see Tsume again… Tsume…

The boy closed his eyes, tears in his eyes as he quickly put his arms up to cover his face. Just then, he heard a young girl's voice cry, "NO!", looking up as another wolf barged through the others. It quickly placed itself in front of him, its teeth bared and hackles raised at the rest of the pack. The boy's pulse quickened; it was the white and silver wolf that he had followed out here!

She stayed her ground as the other wolves continued to growl, now turning their attention to her, the new intruder. The boy lowered his arms, leaning back on the ground as the wolf held her stance next to him, determined to protect him from the others.

It was then that the boy noticed a larger brown wolf moving through the pack toward them, its yellow eyes glowing. The white and silver wolf turned her gaze toward him, her ears lowering as he approached them and stopped in front of her. She withdrew her snarl, as did the other wolves. "Miri," he breathed, his tone angry, "What have you done?"

"Father! He's like us!" she pleaded, stepping back, her four legs standing over the boy's.

The brown wolf snarled in reply, snapping at her face. She yelped in reply, cowering back just slightly. "Stupid girl!" he yelled, "He's an outsider! He doesn't belong here!" The other wolves began to growl again, following the suit of their leader. They stepped in closer but the female wolf remained standing over the boy, snarling back in reply.

"Move aside." Her father commanded.

"No!" she yelled back, "You can't kill him!" She growled directly at him, "I won't let you! You'll have to kill me first! …" She wouldn't move. Her mind was made up.

The brown wolf stood over the top of her, his hackles raised and his fangs bared. The white and silver one snarled back at him, daring him to make the first move. The other wolves began to ready as well, ready to jump in as soon as the leader accepted the challenge. The boy remained frozen underneath the female wolf, his eyes wide and heart beating fast as the scene took place around him.

But just when things were about to get worse, an old man's voice sounded from outside all of the commotion. "Turek!" The boy looked ahead as an elderly gray wolf stepped into the circle, slowly making his way to the dark wolf and his daughter. "Does a tree cut off its own limb?" he asked, standing next to the pack's leader.

The dark brown wolf snarled in reply, "Stay out of this, old man."

The gray wolf stood there for a moment, not saying anything as he looked around at the others, who seemed to submit to his presence. He smiled, then looking back to the white and silver wolf who would not look at him. "Miri," he spoke to her gently. She still wouldn't look up, her ears back and frowning as if she had been defeated. "Miri, look at me."

She did so slowly, her face troubled.

He only smiled at her, "My dear, what is the point of this? Are you really willing to throw your own life away on this boy?"

"Yes." she simply replied, her voice only lacking a small bit of confidence.

The gray wolf sighed, "You really are your mother's daughter..." He then turned to the rest of the pack, his expression fading from content to one of seriousness. "End this. Return to your dens." He strictly commanded. The other wolves lowered their ears and nodded, slowly walking away from the scene and into the night, one at a time.

After a few moments, all that remained now were the three wolves and the boy, who still couldn't believe what he was seeing. The silence was broken when the dark brown wolf finally spoke, "Well?"

"Well what?" the older wolf replied.

"I can't believe you'd undermine me like that! What is this?" he yelled angrily, snarling once more.

"All in good time, my son. You will see." The gray wolf spoke calmly, then he turned to the young female. "Miri, get along now. I'll catch up to you and your father in a moment or two." He smiled.

The white and silver wolf looked back to the boy, her golden green eyes troubled. "Miri!" her father yelled, snapping her attention back to face him. She nodded, stepping away from the boy. "Dammit, Kalev." The brown wolf growled once more to the older one, "I hope you know what you're doing to our pack." He then turned to snarl at his daughter, who nodded in reply and quickly followed after him. She only looked back once more at the boy, their gazes catching each other only for a moment.

The boy sat there, unsure of what was going on. Just before his thoughts began to run even more wild the old wolf turned back to him, frowning, "You're not fully awakened yet, are you?"

"W-what?" the boy breathed. "How do you? What… why are… What are you?" he choked on each word.

The gray wolf smiled, "Silly boy." He nudged him under the arm, "Stand up."

He did as he was told, stumbling as he tried to gather himself. He winced as he felt the cut on his left thigh and placed his hand over it. It wasn't bleeding profusely, but it was still bad. The wolf looked back at him, "Don't worry. We'll take care of that." He looked away and began to move forward, walking slowly. "Now come on, young pup."

The boy frowned at the name, but nodded and began to walk after him. He didn't know what much else he could do, really. He grabbed his backpack, slowly limping after the old wolf. He was a little anxious and worried, not knowing where they were going.

All he knew is that he would find out everything soon enough.

…

The sky was a bright blue that day, foamy white clouds filling its great abyss. The sun was shining brightly, the summer's warmth beating down on the skin that wasn't covered up by his white tank top. The boy sighed, leaning back onto the hard red surface, kicking his legs that were dangling off the edge. He sat at the very top of a plateau that rose about twenty feet or so off the ground, overlooking the rest of the landscape.

It was so beautiful out here. The land was painted with many shades of reds, blues, oranges and purples, green brush here and there. Further out he could see the forest's edge growing out onto the red ground covered with brittle grass. What he at one time had considered a wasteland, he'd grown to love.

Had it really been over a year since he'd come out here?

Closing his eyes, he breathed in deeply and smiled to himself. He couldn't believe it. Even though it seemed that his search for paradise had been put on hold for some time, it wasn't like that at all. There was a small part of him that wondered if this was paradise. He truly had come to love everything out here, the nature, the small town and his new pack. This was his life now.

But even though it seemed he had finally found security and peace, there was still something inside of him that longed for something more. A familiar face began to venture into his mind just before a hawk flew overhead, calling out and bringing him out of his thoughts. The boy watched as it soared overhead, gliding on the wind's currents.

The sun came out again, as it had been hiding behind a cloud. Squinting his eyes, the boy wiped away the sweat from his forehead, pushing his auburn hair back behind his ears. He then reached inside his pant's pocket, pulling out a band. He began to tie his hair back, not believing how long it had gotten, at least another four or five inches past his shoulders.

"That's better!" he sighed out loud to himself, having gotten his hair out of the way, his skin being able to breath better with the heat. Even though summer was almost to an end, it was still very warm out. He hadn't bothered to cut his hair since he'd been here, letting it grow long like this. Maybe he should cut it off?

No, Miri liked it... He smiled again, kicking his feet once more.

"Hey you!" he heard a girl's voice echo from down below. Looking down, he accidentally kicked off one of his sandals. He made a funny face, watching as it bounced off the rocks on its way down, finally landing on the red ground. Suddenly a girl stepped from behind a few tall rocks, walking over to the shoe and bending over to pick it up.

The boy watched, smiling as she stood back up, pointing the shoe up at him. "Did you try to hit me with this, Toboe?" She yelled. He could tell that she was pretending to be angry, one of her hands on her hips.

"Yes! But I missed!" he called down at her, laughing.

"Well, then I'm coming up to give it back to you! How's that?" she taunted, walking over to the rocks. The boy watched her as she began to climb up. He worried a little that it was so bright out, wondering if she'd even bothered to put on sunscreen. Her skin was so milky white that she even made him look tan! And her hair was just as much the same color, such a light blond that it was almost white.

She'd gone out of view now, but he could hear her climbing up as he leaned back once more, looking out on the land's vast expanse. He still couldn't believe how long he'd been here with everyone. He could still remember that night like it was yesterday…

…

The boy winced, yelping slightly as a wet cloth was applied to the wound on his thigh. "Aghh," he whined, "What's in that?" He watched as the older woman continued to clean the cut, still fresh with blood. She frowned, most likely irritated that she was taking care of an intruder. The boy frowned as well, looking away. He felt so uncomfortable here, an outsider in a strange place with strange people. Or rather, wolves.

He couldn't believe all that had happened this night. What was an hour ago, seemed like minutes that he had expected his life to be over, sitting there as that white and silver wolf stood over him. She was willing to die for him. Why?

And now he was sitting here in this old and small one room house that was only illuminated by a couple of lit candles, being patched up by an old woman who obviously didn't want to be here. He blushed, feeling embarrassed as he only wore a t-shirt aside from his underwear. He sighed, leaning back a little on the bed as the woman continued to dress his wound.

"Whiskey." He heard her mutter. He turned back to her, watching as she wrapped gauze around his bare leg.

"What?" he asked.

"You wanted to know what was on the cloth. So I told you." She plainly spoke, standing up and walking into the kitchen away from him. He watched as she began to wash her hands, studying her wrinkles and long braided gray hair.

It was then that the front door burst open, a young girl that appeared to be his age with pale skin and short light hair barging in. "All right! Where is he?" she announced loudly, a slightly older boy with short black hair quickly following in after her. "Miri, no!" he scolded her as attempted to pull her back. She wouldn't give in, her hands on her hips and her face determined.

The girl darted her head back and forth until she saw the boy across the room, sitting on the edge of the bed. "Wait! Don't look!" he immediately cried, grabbing a blanket to cover himself up.

"Aw, don't flatter yourself!" she waved her hand, walking over to him.

The boy clutched the blanket next to him, "W-what?" he breathed, frowning and embarrassed at the implications. He watched as she now stood in front of him, her hands on her hips once more as she looked down at him, her face scowling.

The other boy just stood behind her, rolling his eyes and crossing his arms with a shrug.

The boy didn't understand what this was. He shot a glare back at the girl in defense, not sure what he was up against. After a couple of minutes of silence passed by, the girl sighed, looking back to the older woman who was still in the kitchen, now pouring herself a cup of hot tea.

"Gran!" she began, "Is he ok? What's his name?" she asked, her tone frustrated.

"I don't know," the old woman answered, sipping her hot drink, "Why don't you ask him?"

The girl then shot her head back to the boy, still frowning. "You! Are you okay? What's your name?"

He couldn't speak for a moment, frowning back at her. But it wasn't out of anger, it was out of frustration. What was with this girl?... He glanced over to her friend, who glanced at him plainly and then looked away.

The boy bit his lip and finally answered, not sure of what else to do, "Toboe... And yes, I'm fine." He looked away then, feeling uncomfortable with the whole situation. And then he heard the other boy snickering a little and he looked up at him, his face giving way. "You're scaring him! I think he shit himself!" he began to laugh harder, bending over and clutching his stomach.

The girl turned to her companion, biting her lip and snarling right before she hit him on the arm. He yelped, stopping his laughing all together. "Fuck, Miri!" he growled.

"Language!" the older woman yelled from the kitchen. She had begun to mess around in there, and the others could hear her putting something together with all the noise from the pantry doors and mixing bowls.

"Yes, sorry Ma'am." The black haired boy apologized, sticking his tongue out at the girl.

Toboe studied the older boy for a moment, looking at his black hair and golden eyes. He sat up straight then, his eyes widening when he finally figured it out, "Wait a minute! You're that black wolf, the one who snapped at me!" he accused him angrily. The black haired one looked back at him and smirked. "Yeah, what's it to you?" he sneered.

"And you!" Toboe pointed to the girl, who looked at him and smiled warmly from ear to ear, "You're that white and silver wolf, right?" He was trying to adapt to the situation, being taken in by these strangers who were just like him. But it still didn't feel right.

The girl took a bow, gesturing her hand in a service manner, "That'd be me, mah dear!"

"T-thanks," Toboe stuttered, remembering his manners.

"For what?" she replied.

The other one smirked, "Hmph… Figures."

"Get out of here, Sera! I told you to leave me alone, anyways!" the girl's attitude took a turn for the worse as she snapped at him angrily. He only put his hands up in defense, smiling and sweating a little. "Okay, okay." He stepped back, walking away from them. But before he ducked out the front door, he turned back to her, "Geeze, Miri. You think you can act like this just cuz' yer Turek's daughter? …Daddy's little girl."

"Screw you!" she yelled.

"Language!" the older woman yelled again, just as the door was shut. The girl turned back around, frowning and sitting on the bed next to Toboe. She put her hands under her legs, bending over a little and sighing. "I'm sorry about that. He's such a jerk." She looked over to the boy when he didn't say anything. "Oh!" she smiled suddenly, "I'm Miri!" she held out her hand to him, waiting for him to take it.

"Yeah… I got that." The boy replied. He was frustrated and just way too tired for this. He was about to shake her hand when the older woman came over to them. The girl pulled her hand away, frowning as she thought the boy had ignored her. The woman sat on the chair next to the bed, holding a steamy bowl and spoon in her hand. "Sit up, Toboe."

"How do you know my-"

"I have ears, don't I? Now sit up." She commanded.

The boy blushed, nodded and did so, leaning back against the wall. The old woman leaned in closer, spooning some of the hot liquid from the bowl. "Open up." She spoke roughly and the boy listened, not wanting to protest the cold mannered woman.

Toboe swallowed it but almost gagged. "Ugh, what is that?" he asked, instinctively grabbing his throat.

"You ask too many questions." The woman replied, shoving the hot bowl into his hands. "Finish it, yourself." She then stood up, walking back into the kitchen. The boy watched her, his eyes wide at the attitude she held.

"Ignore Gran, she's old." Miri whispered to him, snickering.

"I'm not that old!" the woman hollered back, a slight bit of humor now in her voice.

The girl laughed, leaning in next to Toboe who held onto the warm bowl of hot soup. A part of him wanted to laugh as well, but he couldn't. Instead he looked down into his bowl, watching the swirling gold liquid and bits of herbs move around as the girl pressed in closer to him, still giggling. She didn't know the meaning of personal boundaries, did she?

…

"Can you believe it? I can't wait for tonight." the girl smiled, stretching her arms out to the blue sky.

The boy looked at the pale girl walking next to him along the dirt path, smiling as she spoke.

"I'm so excited. Just once a month isn't enough…" she sighed, looking off into the distance.

The boy smiled again, putting one hand in his pocket as the other pulled along an empty wagon. Miri didn't have to say what she was talking about because she'd been talking about it non-stop for the entire time he'd been there. He knew that it was the night of the full moon. The pack's elder, Kalev, had told him little of it.

He was still considered an outsider among everyone else, even the young children hardly spoke to him. Their village near the forest's edge was small, and one would assume that everyone living there would be friendly, but they were not. At least not to him. He was trying to fit in, but he still felt out of place.

But he was excited as well, not only for the celebration, but Kalev had promised that he would fully awaken tonight, embracing his true identity as a wolf. But he was also nervous, as he felt he was expected of him. The three months that he'd been staying with their pack, he hadn't been able to change at all. It embarrassed him how random it had been since he'd caught the scent of that lunar flower back in that alleyway in the city.

The old gray wolf had recently appointed himself the boy's mentor. While they hadn't spoken much before then, Kalev promised that after this night of the full moon, that everything would change for him. And tonight would be the first time that he would ever be allowed to participate as if he were part of their pack. Everything he knew up until now was about to change.

But for now the two teenagers were on their way into town, sent by Miri's Gran to run errands. The boy smiled, remembering why he'd begun to like her in the first place. As soon as he heard the girl call the old woman Gran, he felt such familiarity with her for obvious reasons. He had come to learn that she too was raised her grandmother, even though Turek, her father and the leader of the pack, was alive and breathing. That was all he knew. He assumed it was much more complicated than that though.

"Toboe, you've got the list, right?" Miri broke the silence as they finally approached the town.

Toboe nodded, pulling it out of his pocket to show her. The girl smiled and gave him a thumbs-up in approval, taking it from him before she stopped at the end of the dirt path where pavement took over. She looked both ways up and down the street, even though it was dead. Crossing the street, the boy followed her, dragging the wagon across the road.

The small, old town was fairly busy as it was midday. There were only a few cars, it was mostly pedestrians. It seemed that each one would stare at them as they passed. Was he considered an outsider here too? This place wasn't any different from the wolves' village off in the wilderness.

He looked around as he followed her onto the sidewalk and into the town, recalling when he'd been here last. The diner, the man who bought him dinner, the motel with no vacancy and the park bench-it was all coming back to him.

And then other things came back to him as well. His journey had been delayed, hadn't it? He'd run away from the only home he ever knew, the only person he had ever loved, to come out here to this… He could have moved on after that night, three months ago, but he didn't, did he? Did this make him a hypocrite?

"Hey you, what are ya doin'?" the boy looked up, seeing Miri a few feet off getting ready to walk into a shop. She was waving after him, a disgruntled look on her face.

"I'm coming!" he called after her, realizing he'd fallen behind. When he reached her, she had her hands on her hips and was tapping her foot. "Oh, stop it." Toboe groaned. There were times before that he'd let her get away with that attitude, but today was just too hot. He was anxious for the fall to be here already.

The girl didn't respond to his remark, which made him curious. She just shrugged and entered the shop, which appeared to be the town's market. The boy glanced around as he stepped after her, walking through each aisle as she filled the wagon with items from the list. This place wasn't like what he was used to. It was smaller than the city's street market and not as busy either.

"You're going to love Kalev's stories. I just know it," Miri spoke as she gathered boxed and canned goods, throwing them into the wagon. "I always loved them when I was growing up. But you, you're hearing them for the first time. I'm sure it will be just amazing."

"Stories? About what?" Toboe asked, turning the corner into the next aisle after her.

"What do you think?" she stuck her tongue out at him, "Wolves, duh."

The boy didn't say anything, slightly irritated at her tone. He'd had so many people in his life treat him like he was stupid and he was getting tired of it. So instead of responding, he just continued to follow her. She did look back once at him, curiously, then angry before she shot her head back forward.

Toboe frowned. Why should she be upset?

It wasn't long before they were done and through the checkout line, their wagon filled to the brim. He was having trouble pulling it with all the weight that it held, mostly canned goods and jars. And even still, she was giving him a hard time as they walked down the sidewalk. "C'mon, ya slow poke! Time's a-wastin'!" she yelled back at him, about fifteen feet ahead.

"I'm going as fast as I can!" he growled, "Maybe a little help? It's kind of heavy, ya know!"

"Nah, you don't need me! You're just weak!" she shot back. Then she stopped, smirking, "You're not even a real wolf."

That was it.

Toboe dropped the wagon's arm, letting it fall to the ground in a thud. He then walked straight forward, not looking at her as he moved past her, a scowl on his face. He was fed up. He wasn't going to take it anymore. He had begun to walk back in the direction they'd come, leaving the heavy work to her.

"What do you think you're doin?" she shouted after him.

"What does it look like? I'm heading back!" he called back.

"What? …Wait, I can't get this by myself!" she yelled, a slight tone of pleading in her voice.

"Sure you can, you're not weak like me!" he replied.

Miri stood there for a moment, thinking over the situation. She then clutched her fists, bending a knee forward as she glared at him, "Fine! Just go, you jerk!" The boy then glanced back, frowning as he watched her take the wagon's arm and begin to pull it. _I'm the jerk?_ He thought, _Really? _

Toboe moved on, listening to her struggle with the wagon a good twenty feet behind him as they walked along the town's sidewalk. A few minutes passed before his conscience finally began to soak in. This wasn't like him, was it? This wasn't being strong or brave at all. He was the one being a jerk.

By now the sound of the wagon's creaky wheels had stopped. She had given up, hadn't she? He turned back around, deciding to help her with the heavy load. But all he saw was the wagon, still full of goods and sitting there alone on the sidewalk. What?

Where was she?

He frowned, quickly moving back to the wagon. But he stopped when he heard voices coming from an alleyway nearby. Something wasn't right. His heart began to beat fast as he slowed his fast steps to a steady pace, slowly moving near the corner of the building from where the sounds had come.

Glancing around the corner, he noticed two men a ways down the alleyway. And there was Miri.

"Screw you, you creep!" she spat into one of the men's faces. He wiped his face and became immediately angry, grabbing her arm. She winced, placing her hand over his. "Let go!"

"Listen, little girl," the other one spoke, "You're only making it harder on yourself," He swung open a pocketknife, waving it in her face. She became frozen, her shaking body pressed against the concrete wall as her eyes widened. The first man smiled, still holding her before he felt eyes watching their scene. He glanced up, back to where the boy was hiding behind the corner. "What?"

Toboe gulped, pulling his head back, his heart was beating wildly as he bit his lip. Did they see him?

The man smirked, most likely thinking that it was nothing and turning back to the girl. The threats continued as the boy stood there, unsure of what to do. What could he do? He looked around, noticing that it was getting later in the afternoon and there were barely any people out, if at all. And those who were, were a ways off. No police around either…nothing.

He noticed the wagon in front of him, thinking maybe he should grab the cans of fruit and throw it at them. But what good would that do?

Toboe closed his eyes, thinking that he might cry but then something else took over. He became angry, biting his lip and furrowing his brow. He was sick of people like this. He thought that maybe this town would be different from the city he'd lived in, but no. They were everywhere. And he couldn't just stand here and let it continue any longer.

"No," the girl gasped, tears in her eyes as she felt the man's hand on her thigh, slowly making its way up her skirt.

"What's that?" the man doing it sneered as the other one behind him laughed, still holding the knife to her face.

"I SAID NO!" she unexpectedly screamed, kneeing the man in the groin. She missed just barely, but it was still enough to cause him to back off. The man with the knife had also stepped back, allowing her the chance to break free. She took off down the alleyway, tears flailing from her eyes as she desperately tried to escape. The men chased after her, furious and fast on her heels.

And just as she was about to make it out of there, she felt a set of arms grab her, pulling her back. "NO!" she cried, hoping that someone might hear her. But it was no use.

She closed her eyes as one of the men pressed his face next to hers, "You're gonna regret that," he spoke menacingly as she still tried to get lose.

Suddenly, out of nowhere a low growl sounded through the alleyway, echoing off the walls. The struggle came to a halt and the three figures stood there, standing still with their eyes wide. Before them at the entrance of the alleyway stood an animal covered in red fur, its hackles raised as it snarled at the two men.

The girl smiled, her brows still furrowed.

"You didn't say she had a dog…" the second man muttered to the other. And with that, the animal growled and lunged down the alleyway with full speed toward them. Both men yelped, not expecting the sudden attack. One of them stepped back quickly, taking off in the opposite way as the other one still held onto the girl. And that's the man that the beast went for.

It lunged directly at his free arm, but the man swung around, still holding onto the girl. The animal just barely missed him. His free arm held the knife and he pointed it at the beast as he stood there shaking, holding onto the girl with the other arm. "Y-YOU FUCKIN' COWARD!" he screamed down the alleyway at the man who was running away, almost gone from view now.

The animal prepared itself in an attack stance, its ears back and its teeth fully bared. It slowly stepped toward him, the man shaking in fear and whimpering. And then suddenly the animal leaped for his face, his jaws open. The man yelped, quickly throwing the girl right at the beast in his defense, turning to run at the same time. But instead of falling into the girl, the animal leapt right past her, managing to graze his teeth against the man's arm, slashing into his skin and drawing blood.

He cried out in pain, stumbling into the wall as he clutched the fresh wound. He swung around, not allowing himself to fall but instead gathered himself and ran as fast as he could. The animal kept on him, biting at his heels as the man cried out with each sound of those sharp jaws snapping.

The beast stopped at the end of the alleyway, letting him get away. It stood there for a minute or two, making sure of the surroundings before its breathing began to slow once more, its blood pressure going back to normal. Slowly turning back around, the animal made its way back towards the other end of the alleyway where the girl sat on the ground, her clothing and hair disheveled, eyes tearing up.

The animal whined a little as it approached her side, its ears down once more with its tail slowly swishing back and forth.

"Oh, Toboe," the girl cries, "It's you, isn't it?" She latched onto him, crying. He nuzzled his head against her, trying to comfort her as she hugged him, sobbing into his red fur.

* * *

><p>Reviews make me happy and when I'm happy, magical things happen. Hehe.. ;D<p>

One last thought, I'm going to get some sketches up of the characters I've added as well. Looks like they're becoming part of the story now.


	20. Chapter 20

Congrats! You get an extra long chapter just because!;) Hehe… I know I promised it earlier, but life happens. … Thanks. Hehe… Otherwise, enjoy! :D

FYI: If you prefer the "uncut" version, please check out adult fanfiction dot net or deviant art.

Caution: Further chapters will contain mature content such as language and yaoi, Tsume/Toboe. Be forewarned.

Disclaimer: I do not own the characters or series of Wolf's Rain. They belong to BONES & Keiko Nobumoto. This story is non-profit for my own and others' enjoyment. Thank you. :)

**Awakened**

Tsume… Do you remember the day we met? I know it must have been annoying how I latched onto you… But the fact was, I had always felt so alone in this world until you came along. And even though you said you didn't need me, I could never believe that. Finding you opened my eyes, it made me feel alive inside. I couldn't believe that there was someone out there who was like me... Everything changed when I met you.

…

"Miri!" the older boy's voice ran out as soon as they came into view of the village. He came running to greet the two younger ones, the boy now changed back into his human form and pulling the wagon behind him. The girl looked down to the ground, noticing the rip on her leggings as well as her shirt. She crossed her arms, blushing as he approached them.

The sun was just beginning to set in the distance, the orange glow illuminating the three figures.

The black haired boy stopped in front of them, breathing heavily. He paused for a moment before frowning and yelling at the girl, "Where were you? You were supposed to be back two hours ago…" He finally noticed Miri's downcast gaze and her appearance. "What happened?" he appeared to be surprised.

When she didn't respond, he grabbed both of her shoulders, forcing him to face her. "Miri, are you ok?" He sounded no longer angered, but concerned.

"I'm fine… Toboe…" she looked back to the other boy, still holding the wagon's handle. "He saved my life." She smiled, then turned her gaze back to the ground, "I was attacked, but Toboe was able to go into his true form and chased them away. He-"

"True form?" Sera yelled, "Miri, did you-"

"No!" she responded, looking at him when she cut off his words. "…What about Father? Is he…"

"He sent me after you a minute ago. Now I see you like this," he paused, stepping back and looking at her as she blushed. "It's a good thing Turek didn't come himself. And it's a really good thing you didn't change, he would've killed you. I'm glad you weren't stupid-"

"What?" Toboe finally spoke up, not bearing to hear Sera any longer, "If she changed, she could have tried to save herself!" he clutched his fist, frowning angrily. "What would've happened if I wasn't there?"

"You don't understand," Sera muttered.

"What's to understand?" he yelled back.

"Toboe…" Miri spoke, "I know you're trying to help, but-"

The younger boy turned to her, glaring as he bit his lip. The girl then turned away from him, tears appearing in her eyes. He immediately felt himself soften and he stepped over to her, reaching out his hand to touch her, "Miri…"

Suddenly the older boy stepped in between the two of them, growling as he pushed Toboe away with both hands. "Back off!" he yelled, standing in front of the girl.

"What's your problem?" Toboe caught himself before he fell, angrily defending himself as he didn't back down.

Sera growled at him, stepping forward. "Fuck you! …You don't get to be that for her! This is OUR pack, you pathetic runt!"

Toboe winced at the name, biting his lip. He so badly wanted to lash out against him, but he wouldn't because he could see Miri trembling behind the older boy, hurt and worried about their fight. Sera wasn't going to back down. He continued, "You were stupid enough to throw your life away, but I won't let you do that to us, to her!" he looked back at Miri, who now had her hand on his arm. "Sera…" she breathed calmly.

"Enough," Sera responded coldly, still glaring at Toboe, "I'm sick of looking at you. You're a weak excuse for a human being. You're not even a wolf! …Turek should've killed you when he had the chance."

"Sera!" Miri yelled at him, grabbing his arm.

He turned to face her and she continued, "Please…" she looked down, "Just let it go…"

"Miri," Sera breathed, taking the trembling girl in his arms. He then turned back to Toboe, snarling at him, "This is your fault!"

Toboe was fuming, "Mine? You were the-"

"Toboe!" the girl's voice sounded, cutting him off. The boy stopped and looked up, shocked as it was unexpected. "Just leave us alone! Please!" she cried, burying her face into the older boy's shoulder. Sera held her to him, turning around to leave. "C'mon, Miri. It's all right." He spoke gently.

Before they left, he turned his head back to the younger boy, scowling at him. "You stay away from her, or I'll rip your throat out." He spoke this very seriously.

Toboe growled but didn't say anything, shocked, confused and angry at the entire thing.

…

The sun was almost completely gone from the sky, the night quickly approaching as the warm shades of sky began to disappear. The auburn haired boy sat on a grassy hill, overlooking the village below. It was small, but it was what he'd come to know. He could see the other pack members, still in human form walking to and from each other's houses, stopping in conversation and carrying things back and forth. They were still preparing for the full moon celebration.

He sighed, wrapping his arms around his legs and resting his chin on his knees. It had been two hours since he'd gotten into that fight with Sera, if that's what you'd call it. But he was still angry, not only at the older boy, but at Miri. How could she not stand up for him?

He heard laughing down below and looked, seeing a few children playing. They were running around happily, chasing and screaming gleefully when they ran into each other. The boy groaned at the scene, burying his face into his knees. He wanted to go back to those days, when he was young and carefree. He felt so old now. But… even when he was a child, things were never like that, were they?

He had always been different from the other children.

While they would enjoy simple things such as toys or running together, he would often go off by himself. He would lay there in the grasses, just staring at the sky, imagining what more this world held for him than just this. He longed to see everything, holding appreciation for this life that most children his age never even thought about.

And because of this, he was an outcast.

But that's why he was so close to Gran. She was the only one who understood him. She was the only one that was like him.

His eyes began to tear up, just wishing to go back to those days. If only he could close his eyes and make it happen again, he'd do everything over. He'd spend more time, he'd appreciate it even more… he'd make his life worth living.

And then he realized that he was an outcast here too. He would never really fit in with the rest of them. Even though he was a wolf like the others, he would never be one of them. Who was he kidding? Sera was right.

"Toboe?"

The boy glanced up out of his thoughts, looking to his left to see Miri standing there. Her face was one of concern, seeing that he appeared to be crying. He realized this and quickly shot his face away from her, looking back to the village. "What do you want?" he asked, apparent anger in his voice.

The girl frowned, clutching a fist and looking down to the grass. Approaching him slowly, the boy heard her nestle in next to him on the grassy hill. He saw her lay a jacket at his feet, but he still wouldn't look at her. Not only was he still angry, he was embarrassed.

"Are you cold?" she asked, "It gets so cold here at night…" Her voice was soft and timid, not her usual boisterous self.

Toboe sighed. She really was trying, wasn't she?

"Are you sure you want to sit next to me?" he muttered, "Sera might-"

"I don't care." She interrupted him, "So why should you?"

"Uh," Toboe looked at her then, his tears gone, "He did kind of threaten to kill me-"

"Nah! He wasn't serious," she leaned back, her tone changing to a more relaxed one. She was returning to her usual self.

"Well, he sounded kind of serious." Toboe replied, half joking. He then looked off, his face changing back to one of somber. "Besides, maybe he's right."

"What do you mean?" Miri replied.

The boy sighed, looking out to the village again, watching the figures move around quickly to set tables full of food as the sun set in the sky. "I don't know if I should be here anymore. I just don't fit in… What good am I?"

The girl frowned, biting her lip before she pushed him, causing him to lose his balance and fall back. He yelped when he did so, "Hey!" he growled, "What was that for?"

"You saved my life!" she yelled back at him, her face determined. Toboe was about to reply and stopped, realizing that this was not a fight that she wanted. She was trying to make him feel better.

"I can't stop thinking… if you hadn't been there…" she spoke softly, moving in closer to him, also looking down on the village.

It was then that Toboe finally spoke up. It had been weighing on his mind, "You say that you're thankful I was there, but I don't understand why you couldn't change. Why didn't you do it?" He looked at her, obviously confused, "And what about Sera? Why wouldn't he want you to protect yourself?" He looked away again, sighing with a mutter. "It's so stupid…"

Miri frowned as she listened to him, pausing for a moment after he was finished before she decided to reply, "It's the law of our pack." She spoke simply, looking out on the village again.

Toboe glanced back at her once more, listening as she continued her explanation. "Everyone else," she said, "They're not like us. They wouldn't understand and it would put us in danger. I hope you can understand that…" She looked at him, smiling.

"I get it… I'm sorry." The boy replied, feeling stupid for everything he'd said. Of course, it was that simple, wasn't it?

"As for Sera," Miri looked away again as she smiled, "He's just jealous." Her smile then turned to a frown as the boy watched. "It was decided long ago that he and I are to be mates one day."

"Mates?" Toboe asked.

"Yes, I guess it's kind of like being betrothed. My father decided it way back when." She sighed, bringing her legs up to her chest and leaning on them. "I used to hate it, my life being decided for me… But as I've grown up, it's not so bad. Sera's not bad either..." She smiled then, most likely thinking of him, "He can be so hot headed, but he's only looking out for me..."

Toboe looked away, frowning, "Oh…" he muttered.

Miri was caught off guard by the tone in his voice and smiled again, poking him in the arm, "What's the Ohhhh for? Do you like me or something?" she laughed.

"No, it's just…" the boy muttered, not looking at her.

She smiled bigger this time, "You do! You do!" she was giggling, rubbing up against him as she teased. "I knew it! Toboe, you-"

"No!" he stopped her, "It's really… not that…"

Miri stopped her teasing, sitting back as she realized he was being serious.

"It's just that… I already have a mate." Toboe shyly replied, still not facing her.

"Oh…" Miri replied, "you do?" She waited a moment, watching his face as she tried to understand. He was looking off distantly, a far away look in his eyes. It must have been something she had said, that made him act like this, "Well, why aren't you with her?" she asked.

"…Him." He muttered.

"Oh!" she exclaimed, embarrassed, "I'm sorry, I-"

"No, it's okay." Toboe frowned, looking down at his feet, "I know I'm different from everyone else. I guess you think-"

"Toboe, no!" she cut him off, "I'm not like everyone else…" she smiled, leaning in closer to him, "Why should our differences or even similarities divide us? …I don't think anything really matters if you want to be with someone. Love is love." She put an arm around him, hugging him to her. He looked up then, surprised at the outcome. His facial expression quickly changed to one of relief and he smiled, laughing a little. He even managed to rub a tear out of his right eye.

Miri laughed also, happy that she had regained her friend. The two of them sat there for a while, just taking in the scenery of the setting sun over the small village below them, while the rest of the pack hurriedly moving around. The boy looked over to his friend who was smiling, obviously excited about the night's upcoming events. This girl had a way with cheering anyone up, didn't she?

It was then that a howl sounded out, echoing across the land. He looked up, seeing that the night had finally arrived and the moon was shining full in the dark blue sky. Other howls followed as he tried to look at what was going on in the village. But all he saw was blurs of figures moving, running in the blares of lights coming from the houses' windows and torch polls that were lit.

"It's starting!" he heard Miri shout excitedly and looked her way. She already turned into her true form. And now in front of him was the white and silver wolf he had not seen since the first night he had come here. She was on all four legs, not longer sitting as her feet began to shake with excitement.

Toboe looked down at himself, seeing that he had not changed at all. He was still the same.

"Come on!" she yelled, taking off down the grassy hill.

"W-wait up!" the boy called after her, stumbling to his feet. He ran after the wolf as fast as he could, still trying to keep his balance going down the hill. One trip and it would send him flying faster than he wanted to.

"Toboe, come on! Just do it!" she yelled once more.

He knew what she meant. She wanted him to change, to run with her and experience everything as a real wolf. But he couldn't. His body just wouldn't give in. It wasn't long before they'd made it down the hill and he was running through the village after the white and silver animal. He could hear howls in the distance, but there was no one here. It was empty. Where did they go?

When they made it past the village and into the forest, he could still see Miri in front of him about twenty feet. He knew she wasn't running at full speed. She must have been going slower for him. He bit his lip and tried to go faster, dodging around the tall trees that were in his way. As he got closer to her, he noticed that around him were the other members of the pack, running through the trees of the forest.

The moon's glow was bright that night, and in several minutes he could see the trees growing thinner, a clearing ahead. The boy stopped at the edge of the forest from where he'd come, now knowing why the other wolves had come here. In this clearing, surrounded by trees and illuminated by the moon, was a grassy field growing with lunar flowers.

Toboe's eyes widened and he lost his balance, reaching out to a tree to help him to stand. It was when he breathed in, that his nostrils were filled with the sweet scent. In that moment, his emotions took over him, a red wolf instead of a boy now looking up to the moon. Throwing his head back, he howled, letting everything inside of release. Other howls echoed around him, joining him in his song as they basked under the pale moon's glow.

It was so beautiful that night, the meadow sprouting white flowers, their sweet scent filling the air. The night sky was a dark blue, reflecting its color on the grasses, trees, flowers and figures below. The sound of howling and hurried footsteps filled the night, the wolves letting go with complete abandon. They panted excitedly underneath the full moon, many running in circles together as a few played, others just enjoying the moment as they laid in the soft grasses.

What was hours later, a red wolf along with a silver and white one found themselves running away to the top of a grassy hillside. The red wolf then yawned, stretching out his limbs. As he laid down in the grass he found that he was next to a lunar flower. He rubbed his head into, smothering the fragrant petals against the ground.

The white and silver wolf smiled as she watched him, rolling in the ground as he whined. A few seconds passed before the red wolf stopped, his tongue out as he panted. He then saw that she had been watching him and he blushed, looking away. She only laughed, sitting herself next to him. They lay there together in silence for a while, watching the rest of the pack below that continued to amuse themselves.

After a few minutes, the red wolf finally spoke up, "Why didn't I see Sera anywhere?" he asked.

"He went hunting with a few others," the female replied, resting her head on her front legs, "That's what the dominant males usually do during the full moons. That's why there's always a big feast the next day… in case you were wondering."

"No… I wasn't." he commented.

Miri laughed at his reply, leaning next to him. "It's great, isn't it?" she asked him.

"Yes," Toboe smiled, "I'm having a lot of fun." He looked up to the moon, wanting to howl again, but continued instead, "You guys really know how to live. It's so nice here… I used to live in a city before, and until now… I never knew that I hated it. This is the life I want…"

The white and silver wolf brought her head up once more, looking at the wolf next to her that was now a boy again. She watched him as he smiled, his arms holding his legs against his chest as he rested his head on his knees. The girl moved in closer, abandoning her true form. "Toboe, are you going to stay here with us?" she asked.

"…I can't." he muttered.

"So… where is he?" she asked after a few moments of silence.

Toboe didn't immediately reply, his happy demeanor turning back to one of sadness. He knew who she was talking about. They weren't able to finish their conversation from earlier. But finally, he did answer, "I left him."

"What? Why?" she asked curiously, a tone of concern in her voice.

"You're kind of nosey…" Toboe looked at her, raising his eyebrows.

"You're the one who brought it up!" she smirked in reply.

"Not really…" he smiled oddly, amused at her actions. He watched her face as she looked at him, eagerly wanting a story. He didn't have to tell her everything, but he could give her something at least.

"Well… we got in a fight." He eventually answered.

"Why? What about?" the girl asked.

"Geeze, Miri!" Toboe groaned, sitting up. He sighed, falling back on the grass. It was a few minutes later before she also sighed, dropping onto the grass herself and laid next to him. The stars were shining brightly as well as the moon, the two gazing up at them as they lay there together.

The girl had decided after a while that she wasn't going to press him any longer; it obviously bothered him. He had gone from such a high of happiness and now to a low of sadness. Why was this? Was it that he missed his mate?

"Toboe," she spoke, stilling staring at the night sky, "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to pry."

"…It's kind of complicated." The boy answered. She didn't expect that, looking over to his face. But he wouldn't look at her, his gaze still facing the stars. He brought his arms up and rested them behind his head, continuing his story, "It was like he… was someone else at times. I never knew what to expect…" he sighed, "Sometimes he was someone I really cared about, but a lot of the time I couldn't stand him… But still, I came to trust him. I even loved him… I gave him everything, but he threw it all away. He ruined everything…" his frowned began to soften, "But I still… I still love him, even though I hate him..."

Toboe sniffled a little, quickly bringing his right arm to cover his face, not wanting her to see him if he began to cry. He bit his lip, realizing what he was doing here, "I'm not looking for paradise, am I? …I'm just running away, aren't I?" he asked, not expecting the reply that came.

"Sometimes I feel like running away."

He looked up, seeing the girl now sitting up again, a frown on her face as she spoke, "I never understand what he's thinking about… if he even really likes me. Maybe it's just because I'm the pack leader's daughter? …I don't know." She turned back to him, watching his frown turn into a smile. She couldn't help but smile as well, turning her face away from him.

"Thanks, Miri." Toboe sighed after a few moments.

"For what?" she asked.

"For listening."

"Listening to what?" an old voice interrupted them. The two young ones turned around, seeing the pack's elder walking up to them.

"Kalev! Did you hear everything?" Miri breathed, anxiety in her voice.

They both moved aside as he joined them, as he gestured at them to do so. He settled down in the grass next to them, releasing a big sigh. "Not everything, my dear." He finally answered her.

"Please, don't tell Sera!" she began to plead with him.

The old man only smiled at her, "Not my priority, don't worry."

Miri looked down, not smiling, but relieved, "Thanks… So… I didn't see you out there, running with everyone else." Her tone changed and she smiled, wanting to change the conversation.

"I'm too old for that, girl." Kalev groaned, his hands on his knees as he sat with his legs crossed. He then leaned in to look over at the boy, who just sat there uncomfortably.

Toboe hadn't spoken to the old wolf since that first night, aside from a few hello's here and there. The only person he felt secure around was Miri. Everyone else seemed to still treat him like an outsider, even though this was the first night he had become like a pack member, being allowed to join in the celebrations.

"So, young man?" Kalev asked him.

The boy nodded, "Yes?"

"What's this about paradise?" the old man's eyes lit up.

Toboe immediately grew anxious. How much had he heard?

"I know a thing or two about paradise." The elder spoke.

And then the boy turned from anxious to excited, wanting to learn more. "Like what? What can you tell me? All I knew is that we are supposed to follow-"

"In time, son. It's all in due time." The older man cut him short. He looked out onto the night sky, the meadow blooming with the flowers of the moon. The boy watched him, curious as to what he knew. Who was this man? There was something different about him, something off. What did he know that he didn't?

As Toboe turned his head back to the moon, he closed his eyes and sighed. From this point on, everything really was going to change.

…

"Come on now, boy!" the old man's voice yelled at him.

The boy found himself in the same field where the lunar flowers had grown 4 months ago. It seemed like almost every day since since he had joined the pack's full moon celebration, Kalev had been working with him and his true nature. While he was thankful, he'd only managed to change at will during the full moon. And as of right now, they were another 3 weeks away from that night.

"It's too cold!" the boy shouted at the pack's elder who stood in the snow about 10 feet away from him. The old man was dressed from head to toe in a thick brown coat, long boots and a scarf to cover his chilled head. The younger one looked down at himself, only wearing a pair of boots, khakis and a long sleeved shirt that was too thin for this weather. The snow on the ground was up to his calves. There were no flowers this time of year, but the evergreen trees still stood proudly amidst the cold.

"Toboe, breath!" Kalev hollered with a smile. "You're too nervous!"

"I'm freezing! That's what I am!" he replied angrily, "Why can't I wear my coat? This is crazy!"

The old man laughed, "You've almost got it though!"

"It's not even the full moon! Why are you making me-AH!" Toboe yelped as a gray wolf lunged at him, causing him to fall back and into the snow. He quickly gathered himself though, standing on his legs again as he brushed off the snow from his legs. He brushed his hair back that had fallen into his face. He was going to have to start pulling it back; it had already begun to go past his shoulders. Looking forward, he saw Kalev in his true form. The animal stood there silently. "Kalev, I-"

"No more excuses." He replied coldly, "If you can't rely on yourself, even when it's not the full moon… then you as good as dead."

Toboe looked down to the snow, frowning. He was trying, he really was. It's just that his mind was so many places right now. It seemed like yesterday he was among another gray wolf, standing here in the snow. He shook the thoughts out of his head, not wanting tears to escape him as he looked back to the wolf.

"…You have the ability, it's in there!" Kalev spoke again, softening his tone.

"I can't though!" Toboe closed his eyes, "I can't do it…" he looked down again just as the wolf growled at him, "You're right. If you think you can't, then no… you probably can't."

The boy looked up as the old wolf continued, "But, if you can at least try… then maybe you can." Kalev watched as the boy began to stand up taller, probably not even realizing it himself. He clutched his fist and looked back to him, furrowing his brow and biting his lip.

"That's it!" the elder smiled, stepping forward, "Get angry all you want! …But you can't hold onto it forever."

Toboe raised his brows as the wolf began to circle him as he spoke, "It's a matter of releasing your emotions. …Just as I've been telling you. You can't follow your mind; you have to follow your instincts. …You have to let go."

"Let go… nothing else matters." The boy muttered, following the animal's footprints in the snow. A familiar face flashed in his mind and he frowned. His stomach felt like it was boiling. Was he angry? Maybe

"Yes," it nodded, "Now…" he stopped in his tracks, growling with his hackles raised, readying himself with his ears back, his tail stiff in an attack stance. Toboe's eyes widened at this and he stepped back, unsure of what was going to happen. In a moments notice, the wolf lunged at him, his teeth bared as he snarled viscously, "LET GO!"

…

It was another 3 weeks before the night of the full moon had come once again. The boy was getting better at taking his true form. He didn't know if it was because Kalev's teaching had become more aggressive or if it was because he was finally letting go of his past. But he did know that whatever it was, it was working.

He had been given a new lease on life it seemed. Nothing else really did matter anymore. He was a part of a pack now. They accepted him as one of their own, regardless of his imperfections. Kalev had appointed himself his mentor, while the other pack members just treated him as they did everyone else.

It didn't matter to them that he wasn't born and raised within the pack. Even though Turek hardly ever spoke to him, he still tolerated him and that was good enough. And Sera… well… he still hated him. It seemed like every chance the older boy got, he would pick on him, whether it was words or a jab in the arm. He had tried defending himself, even avoiding him. But it was only when Sera saw him with Miri that it would get really bad. Yes, she had told him he was jealous, but it was getting kind of old.

"Toboe!" the girl's voice sounded just as his mind had drifted to her.

Toboe was sitting at the main campfire in the village after the pack had had their run. He continued watching the other pack members as the girl ran up to join him. She sat down next to him on the log, moving in closer. "Miri…" Toboe sighed, not looking at her.

"Whatever! Sera's still out hunting!" she smiled and stuck her tongue out at him. He couldn't help but smile as many others joined the circle, a few stretching and yawning. They sat down on the other logs, making themselves comfortable while other pack members grabbed food from the dinner tables before joining them. Children laughed and played, one running past Miri as she smiled, watching him.

She turned back to the boy, searching his face but he still wouldn't look at her. "Toboe, stop acting all gloomy." She growled when she said this, trying to get him to look at her but he wouldn't. Instead of forcing it, she began to watch the fire embers just as he was. They crackled and twisted, casting light and shadows on their faces.

"Besides, he can't kill you even if he really did want to." Miri spoke softly.

Toboe looked at her then. She continued, "It's another pack rule. …If someone were to take the life of another, their life would be taken as well. My father would personally put them down. …It's happened before." The girl looked at him, smiling. "So you have nothing to worry about."

The boy looked at her then, "That doesn't make me feel any better." He gulped.

Miri burst out laughing, leaning forward on the log. He couldn't help but laugh as well. Not only was he relieved that Sera couldn't kill him, he really was feeling better. The girl moved in closer to him as she lost her laughter, wrapping her right arm through his left one. He blushed a little and smiled as she leaned in, resting her head on his shoulder.

Ever since that night he'd first ran with her among the flowers, she seemed distant. He knew that she was getting older from the many conversations they'd had since then. It was expected of her to grow up and become Sera's mate. While he was being mentored by Kalev to become a real wolf, the older females of the pack were showing her how to become a woman.

"I hope you'll stay here forever." Miri muttered, nuzzling her head against his arm.

Before Toboe could reply, the girl did herself as she noticed many of the others now settling in and quieting themselves around the fire. "Are you looking forward to it?" she asked him.

"To what?" he replied.

"Kalev's story tonight!" she snapped. Toboe just rolled his eyes at the response. By now he'd adjusted to her ever switching moves, her bantering and always teasing him. At first it had bothered him a lot. But eventually he had realized she only did it because she liked him.

A child's laughing was quickly hushed by his mother, other voices silencing themselves and others as the pack's elder finally entered the circle. He caught Toboe's eyes and smiled at him, causing him to dart his glance elsewhere. This made him angry at himself. He still felt insecure, even unworthy. This man had such faith in him and sometimes it seemed like he was only continuing to let him down.

"Lovely evening everyone," Kalev smiled. He rubbed his hands together in front of the fire and then over his knees. "It's cold, huh?" He asked a young child that sat next to him on the log, who laughed in reply. The other pack members laughed as well, nodding in their agreement as Toboe looked around. He didn't notice Turek or Sera as well as a few other males. They were probably still out hunting.

"So, Toboe?" Kalev called over to him as the others began to quiet down.

Toboe shot his head up at his name being called, "Yes, sir?" he breathed.

Kalev laughed, "You're too jumpy, boy! …Come over here!" he waved at him.

Toboe looked to Miri, who smiled at him. "When the elder calls you, you go!" she nudged him away from her, pinching him on his rear. His face turned bright red and he quickly stood up, jumping around angrily. "Hey!" he shouted.

Miri just looked away sheepishly, shrugging. She stuck her tongue out.

Toboe decided to ignore her for now, shaking off the girl's teasing once more as he made his way over to Kalev. He moved past the other logs where the rest of the pack members sat. He could feel them watching him as he trudged his way through the snow. Why was Kalev putting him on the spot like this.

"Here, here, my boy." The old man smiled, patting the empty seat next to him.

Toboe nodded, sitting down. He looked back over to Miri once more who smiled mischievously, looking up as she ignored him. He growled in reply.

"Toboe, how much do you already know?" Kalev asked.

"About what?" he replied, looking at him.

"Paradise. I know that you've mentioned it before." He spoke as the others began whispering amongst themselves, no doubt curious about why he was addressing the boy in the first place.

"Oh… well…" Toboe looked down, clasping his hands together. He frowned. How much could he tell him? Would he sound crazy if he told him he'd attempted venturing to paradise before, that this was his second time around? Yeah... most likely.

"There's something different about you, Toboe." Kalev spoke.

The boy looked up at the old man whose gaze was not directed at him, but upon the embers of the fire. "You know," he continued, "…Come with me." The elder stood up just as the others began to talk amongst themselves.

Toboe reluctantly stood up after him, frowning as he looked around everyone. They no doubt were curious as to why he was leaving him. Every full moon he would share the stories of their grandfathers. But tonight, something was different. He then looked to Miri, who just nodded and smiled.

He nodded back at her and followed Kalev who had begun to walk away from the pack's circle. Before the old man spoke again, Toboe looked back at the other pack members once more, watching their curious faces. It was odd that they didn't resist the spoiling of their tradition But then again, it seemed that this man was to be respected and revered.

Toboe glanced ahead, realizing that Kalev was a ways off and hurriedly ran to keep up with him. When he reached his side, he decided to ask, "Why are you doing this?" He was curious, but kept his eyes facing the snow ahead as they walked.

"Why am I doing what?" the elder asked him.

"Everything. You're so nice to me… you've taught me a lot of things, shown me things… You even made me a member of the pack." Toboe spoke softly.

"Why?" Kalev stopped in his tracks. They were a ways away from the village by now, but the fire circle and lit houses could still be seen flickering behind them. "Because I know that you're special. I knew that when I first caught your scent… That night that Miri found you, it was because of me. I was in town that day when I saw you get off that bus. It was only slight, but the scent of the white flower was on you. But… it wasn't just that. …It's much more potent than that."

Toboe was trying to understand. What could he mean by this? The scent of a flower, only stronger? And then it hit him, "Cheza?" he breathed.

"What is a cheza?" Kalev asked.

"Well… promise you won't think I'm crazy. Ok?" The boy looked down, feeling his cheeks turning red.

"I promise," The old man smiled at him.

"Well, …" How was he going to word this? He bit his lip, deciding to continue regardless of the outcome. "Where I used to live, in the city months ago… I found this book… The book of the moon? …I was curious about it. It was filled with wolves and flowers. And then I met someone, who I kind of remembered… But I didn't know why. It was weird, how everything just felt like it was being repeated… And then you know the lunar flowers?" He looked up to Kalev, who nodded.

Toboe frowned, feeling embarrassed by his choice of words. He was definitely not coming up with much, but he was nervous as all get out. He sighed before he continued, "Well I found one… we did. Tsume… and I… And we remembered everything... The both of us, we were reborn into this life… where I am now… And that's because... we never completed our journey to paradise. I know that's why I'm here. We're supposed to find it again…"

"I heard you mention it before," Kalev interrupted, but became quiet again. This relaxed the boy, who nodded before he spoke again, "Yes. There were others too, other wolves, even humans. That's how I knew what the book was… The book of the moon. It was a legend telling of how the wolves would travel to paradise, to open a new world." He clasped both of his hands, looking down at the ground, "And Cheza… she was a flower maiden… of the lunar flowers. She led us there."

Toboe looked up to him once more, "And we almost made it… but we died…" He looked down again, his voice saddening as the memories flashed through his mind. His final moments, spent with Blue's old man… he alone, just waiting for Tsume to find him… but he never did.

"I don't think you're crazy." Kalev spoke, "Tell me… where did you find this book?"

"Back in the city… in a bookstore." Toboe replied plainly.

Kalev smiled, "Would that happen to be Kingston?"

The boy looked up, his eyes wide, "Y-yes…" he breathed.

"I left that book there." He spoke again.

"Wait, what?" Toboe couldn't believe it. Now he really was curious.

"Yes, but I didn't leave it for you." He frowned then, looking away from him.

"Then who?" the boy asked.

Kalev put his hands in his pocket, closed his eyes and took in a deep breath. In a second or two, he slowly exhaled, his breath steamy against the cold air. He then opened his eyes again, looking back to the boy who stood in front of him, wanting answers. "I came across that book years ago. I've held onto it forever… since I was a young pup like you, actually… My grandfather even translated it, as our pack has always passed down the ancient language of our forefathers. …The book had actually been lost to us for many generations. …That book was created for wolves, by wolves. It has been a guide for our people, Toboe."

The boy couldn't believe what he was hearing, many questions filling his mind. But he listened quietly anyways.

"It is a book of prophesies, a foretelling of what is to come. I grew up listening to many stories of wolves who tried to make their way to paradise… There were four wolves who they think were able to open the door. They followed the lunar flowers in order to create a paradise, a new beginning for all wolves."

"…I don't know how much of this is true, it's just what has always been taught… But whether this world is paradise or not… We are happy here. We have the lunar flowers, the land and each other. We couldn't want more… But this past life that you mentioned…" He looked to Toboe, who listened, his eyes still wide.

"You were one of those four wolves, weren't you?" Kalev asked. The boy didn't answer, so he continued, "I've known this even before you came here… because I saw you in my dreams. It was more than just your scent. When I saw you, I knew. But what of the others?"

Toboe looked down, frowning. "I… I don't know."

"You do know. You mentioned one other." The older man insisted.

"I ran away… I left him." He didn't want to talk about this, not right now.

"Your mate?" came the reply.

Toboe looked up, the old man's face smiling. This caused him to blushed and he looked away once more, "Yes…" he muttered.

"So here you are again, to complete your task." Toboe looked back up as Kalev began to speak again. He was relieved for the moment, "I should thank you for what you did. You four… you saved our race."

This made Toboe smile, but he still wouldn't look at him.

"I am thankful that we have been given this chance to start over… But this world… it has never been perfect. We are told this is paradise. But how do we know that? There is still so much violence and hatred in this world… even though we are all the same. We are all brothers and sisters…"

"What do you mean, we are all the same?" Toboe spoke up.

Kalev smiled again, "Everyone that exists in this life time… We are all the descendants of the wolves before you, who were never able to achieve the dreams of opening paradise…"

"But wait… That doesn't make sense. What about the humans?" the boy asked, confused.

"Boy, there are no humans." The old man answered plainly, "They are just wolves who have not been awakened."

* * *

><p>Whaaaaaaaat? Your thoughts, please. ;)<p> 


	21. Chapter 21

Can you believe it? Another chapter in only two or so days! :D I hope you're excited as I am to keep going… Yes, guess who's on vacation and has a lot of free time? Hehe… Enjoy! ;)

Oh, one more thing… I'm working on a new playlist. I'll have it posted for the next chapter, all right? Until then, look up the song "A Rush of Blood to the Head" by Coldplay. I've listened to a lot of Coldplay during the writing of this. It seems like a lot of their songs speak about complicated and troubled relationships, the ups and down, broken promises and the likes. …So yeah. ;)

FYI: If you prefer the "uncut" version, please check out adult fanfiction dot net or deviant art.

Caution: Further chapters will contain mature content such as language and yaoi, Tsume/Toboe. Be forewarned.

Disclaimer: I do not own the characters or series of Wolf's Rain. They belong to BONES & Keiko Nobumoto. This story is non-profit for my own and others' enjoyment. Thank you. :)

**Where Are You?**

"Wait," the boy breathed, standing there in the cold snow. He was in shock at what he'd just heard. "No humans? I don't… how is that possible?" He brought his right hand up to his forehead, looking down to the snow. There were so many ideas running through his head. That would mean that everyone in this life was a wolf. "Wait!" he shot his head back up, looking to the old man who just stood there.

"So," the boy continued, "Is this paradise then?"

The pack's elder looked at him for a long time, studying his face before he spoke up. "I don't know, Toboe. …I was hoping you would tell me."

"Me… tell you?" the boy asked. He couldn't believe that this man, his mentor… was now the one asking him questions. He noticed the old man's expression, confusion written on his lips. "Well," Toboe sighed, "I don't know… I never really," he looked down again, one hand on the back of his head. "Tsume and I never really talked about it…" he looked back to him before he continued, "I died, Kalev. I don't know what happened after that… I'm sorry I can't answer you."

Kalev brought a hand to his chin, stroking his beard. He smiled then, "I suppose none of us have ever really known the answers… It's only been a story to me until now. You've made it real, son."

"So how long has it been?" Toboe asked, "You make it sound like it's been forever since I was here before. And my Gran," he bit his lip, "That means she was a wolf, too!" his mind was racing, "She mentioned a paradise once... before I remembered everything. She told me it was because of me… she said I created a new beginning for her, the world too. This doesn't make…" he frowned, "How did she know?"

"You continue asking me as if I know all the answers, my boy." Kalev frowned, "I know just as much as you do…" he smiled then, "All I can say is that it was probably instinctual. Just as I caught your scent and knew something was different about you, most likely your Gran did too."

"But my Gran, she-"

"-Was a senile old woman!" a familiar voice sounded from behind him.

Toboe turned around, just as a big deer's carcass was slung at his feet, causing him to stumble back. He yelped at first, but quickly regained his ground. The boy looked down at the dead animal as he stood back up, frowning as he realized who had done. "What do you want, Sera?" he asked angrily as the black haired boy approached he and Kalev.

"Nothin'." He shrugged, "Just commenting on the obvious."

"That's a weak comment." Toboe paused for a moment, slightly shocked at what he'd just said. But instead of backing off, he stood his ground and clenched his fist. "Your insults don't mean a thing to me. So why don't you just take your nasty dead animal and leave me alone? Or else…" the boy growled, still surprised yet confident in his speaking.

However, it made the older one grit his teeth, "You kiddin' me, runt?" He stepped forward, inches away from the boy's face. "Is this a fight you want? Cuz' I've been itching for one since they day you crawled into camp. …You wanna die that bad, do ya'?" He sneered.

"Why not? I'm ready whenever you are." Toboe assured him, smiling with a scowl.

"What is this?" another man's voice sounded, interrupting the two enraged teenagers as he came out of the darkness. He was followed by a few other men, some dragging their kill behind them while the others just carried. The tall dark haired man approached the two boys and the elder, anger on his face. "The pack doesn't need this… so end it now."

The black haired boy looked away and stepped back from the younger one, frowning, "Yes, Turek." He muttered.

"And you," the older man looked back to Toboe, still with an angry expression. The boy was fearful, but for some reason, he couldn't pull his gaze away. The pack's leader stood there, staring at him as the other males walked by the four of them, not wanting to get involved. After the others had finally passed through, on their way back to the village, Turek finally continued, "Are you really that quick to give up your life for the sake of your pride?"

Toboe didn't say anything, only nodded in return.

Turek stood silently for a few minutes, studying the boy's face, the gaze that would not look away. "Fine then."

Sera smiled at the man's words.

"You're joining my hunt for the next full moon," Turek told the younger boy.

"What?" the older boy exclaimed, angry at the turn of events. "That's not fair! He's just a kid!"

The leader glanced at Sera, who was absolutely infuriated, his fists clutched as he growled. Turek then turned back to Toboe, "How old are you?" he asked.

"Seventeen. I just turned seventeen, sir." Toboe quickly replied.

"Sera, how old are you?" Turek asked the older boy.

"W-what?" came the reply, "Just look at him!" he gestured to the younger boy, "He's scrawny and weak! He still can't even turn whenever he wants to. And on top of that, your daughter, Miri is-"

"How old are you?" Turek repeated once more, the tone of his voice very serious.

"I-I'm nineteen…" Sera replied, more sheepishly this time.

"Really? I would've guessed seven." The man commented, "Now, take your kill and go."

Sera looked down, angry, embarrassed and defeated. He didn't say anything as he followed Turek's commands, grabbing the animal's carcass that lay in front of the younger boy. He avoided his eyes as he stood back up, dragging the kill behind him, making tracks in the snow as he made his way to the village.

"Kalev," Turek spoke again, addressing the older man, "What are you telling him?"

"I'm not telling him," the elder replied kindly, "I'm asking him."

The pack's leader did not reply at first, most likely confused by the situation. A few minutes passed as the boy watched the two of them, exchanging glances quietly as if it were a special language between them. Finally, Turek spoke again, "All right then." He sighed and began to walk away, a heavy bag slung over his shoulder.

Kalev watched him go, his hands still in his pockets. He sighed when Turek made it a ways away from them, "Some of us will never find paradise… even if it does exist… even if we are awakened… there are those of us who are still asleep."

"Kalev," Toboe spoke, "Did you ever try?"

The old man looked down at him. He knew what the boy meant. "Yes, Toboe... I did search for it when I was younger." He stopped after that, just standing there as he stared off into the distance of the night sky. The boy frowned after a few moments, wanting him to continue the story. "So… can you tell me about it?" he asked.

Kalev looked to him and smiled, "That will be for another time, son." He stepped back, "I'm old and tired… so I think I'm going to call it a night. Sound good?" He began to walk away from where they stood, assuming the boy would follow. But he didn't.

His mind was racing once more with the silence that ensued. Was this life paradise?

And then he realized they had been interrupted, losing their earlier conversation. He reached out after the old man, desperate for one more answer, "Kalev, wait!"

The elder stopped and turned back, listening as the boy continued, "…You never told me who you left the book for…" Toboe asked again, still wanting to know.

The old man turned back around, smiling before he answered,

"A white wolf."

He then left the boy there, who stood in the cold white snow as he watched him walk away. He still had so many questions. He still felt confused, even angry. But most of all, he just felt lost.

…

The hot sun beat down upon the land, the clouds white overhead as they grazed across the blue skies. Leaning back on the ground, the boy could feel the red rocks beneath his hands. He found a few small pebbles, clutched them in his fist and threw them out over the horizon.

"Ah!" a girl's voice sounded, just as one of the small rocks bounced off her blonde head.

The boy bit his lip, and crawled a few feet over to her, reaching out his hand. "I'm so sorry, Miri!" he apologized.

The girl just waved her hand at his, helping herself up over the cliff side with a grunt. She stood up, brushing the dirt and rocks off of her brown shorts. "You really are trying to kill me." She groaned as she handed him the sandal he'd kicked off the side of the plateau. He nodded, smiling as he reached out to take it from her.

But instead, she swung it back and threw it at him, causing him to yelp when it bounced off his head. "What the hell are ya doin' up here without me? You're supposed to tell me when you sneak off! I'm sicka' yer shit!" she yelled angrily at the boy still sitting on the ground.

The boy rubbed his head, frowning at her as she stood above him, both hands on her hips. He looked away, "Well, you're up here now, aren't you?" he asked, his tone sounding frustrated.

The girl bit her lip for a moment before she couldn't hold it in any longer. "Toboe!" she exclaimed, jumping down to hug onto him, "I missed you!" she cried as he blushed and fell over on the ground. She nuzzled her face against him, smiling brightly.

Toboe held onto as she buried her face into his chest. "Miri," he spoke gently, "Are you crying?"

She pulled her head up, quickly wiping away her tears. "No!" she snapped, then looked away, "Yes…" she muttered before sitting up and moving off of him. The boy sat up as well, frowning as he reached out to touch her shoulder when she turned away from him.

"I can't do it, Toboe." She spoke angrily through her tears, trying to cover them up. She sighed, leaning back against him. He wrapped an arm around her, pulling her closer to him. Resting her head on his shoulder, she moaned a little, biting her lip. "This isn't who I am…" She inhaled deeply.

"You smell different than you used to." She muttered after a few minutes of silence.

"What?" Toboe leaned back, a slight red appearing on his cheeks.

Miri sat up, grinning from ear to ear. She looked him up and down, examining him. "Yes, yes." She smiled before standing to her feet. Glancing down at him, she brought a hand to her chin and stroked it, nodding.

"What are you doing?" Toboe frowned.

"Stand up!" she commanded him. He shrugged and did so, slowly but surely with a sigh. "Straighten up!" He listened and obeyed, but was confused. She was always up to these games. "Miri, what is this?" he asked as she circled him, "Hmmm," she spoke, "Yes I see."

"Spit it out!" he yelled nervously, looking around himself to see if maybe there was something on him.

"You've grown up!" she answered gleefully.

"That's it?" he asked.

"Yes!" Miri replied, "Look at you!" The boy did so as she continued, "It's not just your hair that's grown, you're way taller than me now! See?" She moved up against him, her chest pressed against him as she brought her hand up to the top of his head. Stepping back, she held her hand above her head, showing him the difference. "That's like two inches!" she declared.

"Okay…" he sighed, rubbing the back of his head.

"Even your voice has changed!" she smiled. "Listen to it! …Miri, what is this?" she repeated his words with a grumble, trying to imitate him.

Toboe just laughed at her, sitting back down on the red rock beneath him. He took off his other sandal, setting it aside before he pushed himself toward the cliff. Kicking his feet off the edge, he found the girl at his side once more, joining him. He smiled at her, placing his hand over hers. She smiled as well, then cast her gaze out upon the land.

"It's been over a year now. And fall is almost here again." She spoke, "Toboe… promise me something?"

"What's that?" he asked, also looking out to the horizon.

"Stay with me." She answered.

Toboe looked away, frowning as he removed his hand from hers. She had asked him this many, many times before and he could never answer her. He wanted to though. He wanted to say yes, that he would never leave her. He really did love this place, this life and his friends, especially her. So why couldn't he do that?

"I can't make that promise..." He finally replied.

"Why not?" she whined, "You've already been here this long… You could stay… I just… I just don't want to see you go… I'm afraid that…" she was having trouble getting her thoughts out.

"Afraid of what?" he asked, looking at her with concern.

"I don't want to die."

"Miri, what do you mean?" he asked again. He didn't understand what she was getting at. The girl looked away from him, a worried look upon her face. "My life means nothing here. …My father, the pack… Sera." She groaned, "This whole marriage thing… It's like my life's being given away for me. I'm expected to… just give up everything. And Sera, I know that he feels this way too. He's told me!" she smiled briefly, "I just wish… I'm not ready. He's not ready! …But… I dunno. I just… I can't handle it anymore." She looked down at her knees, no longer kicking in the wind.

"Well, do you love him?" Toboe asked her.

"Love?" she replied, her face turning bright red. She looked away from him, not wanting him to see her reaction but it was too late. "Sera… he's… he's a difficult kind of person. I mean… we've known each other since I can remember, since when we were little. We've always been friends… but the past two years… ever since he turned eighteen…" she frowned, resting her head on her fist.

It was another few moments before she spoke again, most likely going through the thoughts in her head. "Toboe… I understand now. Everything that I've been going through, losing my free time, my identity, my life… that's what he went through… I'm changing too… just like he did."

Miri sighed before looking at the boy again, "You know, there are times that I catch a glimpse of who he really is." She smiled, "If I'm hurt or worried, he'll be so kind… my protector. But…" she looked away once more, frowning, "He can be so cruel… He'll be the one to hurt me! …But …I hate feeling like this… Ughhh… I'm so confused." She groaned, burying her face in her knees.

She looked up once more, sighing. "Yes, I love him." She moaned then, burying her head again. "Something's wrong with me, right?"

"I don't know. …Maybe." Toboe replied.

She looked at him, frowning and smiling at the same time. "You weren't supposed to answer that."

The boy laughed a little, rubbing the back of his head. "No, it's just that… I understand." He smiled, looking out at the sun, beginning to go down in the distance. The girl looked at him as he continued, "It was like that for me too… Sometimes I felt like something was wrong with me… for loving someone who was horrible to me… But he wasn't always like that. There were times when I saw someone beautiful… and that's who I loved."

Miri groaned, looking away. "That doesn't help me at all. You're just the same as me."

Toboe laughed at the girl's response, "It's true though! Sometimes… we can't help who we love. We just do…" he looked down at his knees, not believing the words he'd just spoken. After all this time, did it really not hurt anymore? Months ago, just the thought of Tsume would bring him to tears. Talking about it would send him into depression. But now… it was just a thing of the past.

"I wish my mom were here." Miri spoke, her tone full of longing.

"When did she leave?" he asked.

The girl looked down, frowning. "She died before I was born."

"Before you were born? How…?" Toboe asked once more, confused.

"When she was pregnant with me… there was an accident. And I guess… well my Gran says I'm her little miracle. My dad… I dunno. I guess I don't know him all that well. He was hardly ever around… just when it came time to scold me… Really, my Gran raised me by herself." She explained.

The boy couldn't help but smile, even though it was a sad story. It was so similar to his. He wanted so badly to tell her about his Gran, but he didn't feel that he could. Instead, he tried something else, "You'll see your mom one day, Miri. When the gates to paradise are opened, she'll be standing there waiting for you… She'll smile and tell you how beautiful and kind you are. She'll hug you and tell you how long she's been waiting to finally see you…"

As he was saying this, he wasn't imagining Miri's mother, but his own, as well as Gran. They were both waiting for him.

"You're sweet, Toboe…" the girl smiled. "But… does it really exist? Paradise?" she asked.

Toboe nodded, "Yes, it has to."

"What's it like?" she asked as she moved closer to him. He wrapped an arm around her as she rested her head on his shoulder. Closing his eyes, he tried imagining what it would be like. "Well… the grass is always green… the sky is always blue and there are lunar flowers everywhere. No one ever goes hungry and no one ever fights. There's no violence, no hate… just peace." He sighed.

"It sounds beautiful…" Miri smiled. A few minutes passed before she pulled out of his embrace, smiling at him. He opened his eyes when she did so. "Toboe… I want to go, when you go… I want to go to paradise with you." She sounded very sincere.

"Miri, what about the rest of the pack?" The boy frowned. He expected this, but at the same time, he didn't.

"I don't care anymore… I want something more than this life… This isn't paradise." She answered, looking away with a determined scowl.

"But what about Sera?" Toboe asked.

"Heh! Right… " she looked off, her frown softening. "Sera…"

The boy watched her as she became lost in her thoughts, her facial expressions changing from anger and frustration to sadness and confusion. She looked at him then, her eyes searching his own. "Toboe?" she asked. He nodded in reply before she continued the question, "Can I kiss you?" she spoke embarrassingly, looking away.

Toboe didn't know how to answer her. Did she have feelings for him? …It was something he had begun to wonder over time. They'd grown so close, like best friends. And now there was the possibility of more? But she'd just admitted she had feelings for Sera. …But she wanted to kiss him? He wasn't even sure of his own feelings... This new life… did he want this?

It had been so long since he saw him last… Was he really over Tsume? Moments ago he was able to talk about his past relationship without feeling remorse or pain. He really had grown. Not just in age, but in everything. But… there was still a part of him that felt empty… And now, would he be able to fill that with this girl? He could at least try, couldn't he? And if the kiss didn't bring out any more feelings, why would that be bad? But if it did… He could start over. He could have a new life… a new beginning.

"I'm sorry…" Miri continued when he didn't answer, "I know it's stupid… I just thought that-"

"No," he stopped her, "It's ok. Go ahead." He moved closer and she blushed harder, glancing at him. The boy placed his hand over hers once more, leaning in just inches from her face. He searched her face as her eyes darted about, unsure of the situation that presented itself. He thought for sure that he would be blushing as well, but there was no warmth in his cheeks.

Miri closed her eyes then, as did Toboe as she leaned into him, gently pressing her lips against his. It was soft and sweet, not lasting more than a minute before she pulled back. He smiled at her as did Miri, laughing a little as she brought a hand up to her face. The boy sat back as well, leaning on the back of his hands as he sighed, his thoughts racing again. Well there was the kiss and there it was, nothing.

"Well, that sucks." The girl sighed, still smiling as she looked out on the horizon.

"Yeah…" He nodded, coming to the conclusion that she didn't feel anything either. That must have been why she wanted to kiss him. She was testing her feelings for Sera. He wanted to laugh, but didn't. A part of him felt a little sad, but he didn't understand why. Was it that he wanted her as more than a friend? Or was his heart still elsewhere?

"Toboe, it's no good!" she then exclaimed, throwing herself on her back. "…I'm just not well."

"Neither am I..." He agreed, frowning.

"But really though…" she spoke after a few minutes, "I can't believe it's been that long since you've been here with me. It seems like it was just last night that I met you, my father… he would've killed me too. If it weren't for Kalev…" she smiled.

"Miri, why did you risk your life for me?" Toboe asked, looking back at her.

"I thought you were cute." She winked an eye at him, sticking her tongue out.

"Really?" he laughed a little.

"Well, yes. But…" she frowned, thinking, "There was something different about you. Kalev's been telling me that from the start, but I've always wondered why… I knew even before he said anything." She sat up, "So why is that? You had the scent of the flowers on you, even before you saw them that night you first turned. …And even now, their smell is all over you." She sat up now.

Toboe didn't know if he could say anything. How much had Kalev already told her? How much could he tell her now? Was this supposed to be a secret? …If he did come perfectly clean, he would just sound crazy. She wouldn't buy it. So instead, he answered her, "You should ask Kalev… it seems like he knows a lot more about me than I do myself." Well, he was being honest.

"Kalev..." She sighed, and then she gasped, "Kalev!" She looked at the boy, whose eyes widened at her outburst. She bit her lip and frowned, "…That's why I came out to find you. He sent me after you… How long as it been?"

Toboe laughed a little, "Maybe two hours or more…"

The girl jumped to her feet, beginning to panic. "He's gonna kill me!" she yelped, the sun now setting behind her. She ran over to edge of the cliff from where she'd climbed up and began to let herself down. "C'mon, Toboe! What are you waiting for?"

The boy just shrugged and followed her, knowing that she was just overreacting. Surely Kalev wouldn't kill her… would he?

…

"Forgive me!" the girl's voice rang out, bursting in the front door.

The old man looked up from the kitchen table, a plate beneath him and his mouth full. He was wide eyed at first when the two teenagers entered, but he quickly relaxed. Nodding at them, he continued chewing and gestured at them to join him.

The girl did so hurriedly, running over to the table and pulling out a chair. She sat down just as soon as its legs screeched upon the wooden floor. The boy on the other hand, approached slowly, remaining calm as he pulled out a chair, casually sitting down to join them. He looked over to his friend, who was smoothing out her clothes and hair.

"So what's all the hullabaloo?" the elder asked after finishing his bite. He sipped his water as the girl answered, "You sent me after him, and… I forgot. I'm so sorry." She looked down, biting her lip.

"Miri, you're shaking like a leaf." The old man frowned, leaning over and raising her chin with his hand. He smiled when she looked at him with a sad face, "Those women have gotten you so worked up. There's no need for you to act like this around me. No need for forgiveness either, love." He sat back and took his knife and fork, proceeding to cut the meat that was on his plate. "Now," he spoke, "If you'll please forgive me while I finish up my supper. All right?" he asked her.

The girl just nodded, smiling as she quickly wiped away the few tears that were in the corners of her eyes.

"But don't just sit there, tell me a story or something," the elder spoke again, "What were you doing that took you so long?"

"Well, I…" Miri looked down, her mind still pacing a bit from her previous worries, "I think we... Toboe?" she smiled at him.

The boy nodded, taking the conversation from her. "Yes, Kalev. And it's not Miri's fault, it's mine. I wanted to talk to her first." He winked in the girl's direction, who frowned at him and shook her head. She didn't want him to take the blame.

"Well in that case, get out," Kalev said after he took another sip of his water.

"What?" Toboe breathed, frowning at the remark.

Kalev laughed a little, "I'm just pulling your leg, son."

The boy sighed, relieved as he relaxed back down in his chair.

"Please, please," the old man gestured at him, "Continue."

"Well… we were talking about paradise?" Toboe's answer turned into a question. It had been so long since Kalev had spoken to him about it, not since that night when he'd learned so much more about the wolves, about everything. That was many months ago now and the old man had been silent since, except for mentoring him of course. But it seemed like there was so much more that he still didn't know.

"Well, what do you want to know?" Kalev asked him, looking down at his plate as he took another bite.

The boy was surprised that he was willing to answer. Until now, he actually had mentioned it during many of their lessons, but the elder had just ignored him every time. "Well," Toboe smiled, catching the glance of the girl across the table. She was leaning into the table, her eyes wide as she looked at Kalev. She looked like she wanted to say something, but she didn't.

The boy smiled and continued, "You said you tried to go to paradise before… could you tell me more? And why my bookstore? I never understood that…"

The old man frowned, looking down at his plate that was now empty. He sighed, pushing it away from him as he leaned back in his chair, getting comfortable. "Let's see… I suppose it's best to start at the beginning…" he took another sip of his water before he continued, "…There are those that are never happy with what they have. They always want something more. And then there are those that make do with what they have…" he looked away, staring off as if he were distantly away. "It was so long ago…"

"Miri!" an older woman's voice called. The girl groaned, rolling her eyes as she stood up, walking over to the open window. She looked out into the dark night, trying to see where it had come from. "What is it, Gran?" she called out, not seeing her.

"Time to eat!" the voice rang out, echoing from two houses down.

"That woman's got some pipes!" Miri sighed, stepping over to the door and opening it. "I heard that!" the voice sounded again.

"And ears…" the girl muttered to Kalev and Toboe as she was closing the door. The boy waved after her as she left, as did the older man.

"Go on," Toboe nodded as he turned to him once more.

"My, you don't waste any time at all, do you?" Kalev laughed, clasping his hands together as he leaned against the table. "I was a young wolf, not much older than you in fact… I was never happy. I could never understand why our pack just accepted things the way they were. I grew up listening to the stories of our forefathers, stories of others," he gestured to the boy, who glanced away as he smiled, "And so I decided that was who I wanted to be. I wanted to make a difference, put a dent in the earth… So I ran away."

The old man looked to the boy, expecting a question but nothing came, so he went on, "I left the people I cared about, including my mate… who refused to go with me." He looked down, frowning, "I gave up everything I had in search for paradise. They told me this was it, I grew up hearing that… but I could never believe it… During my travels I saw many things, learned many things… I grew up."

He looked at the boy once more, "That was also when I found the book… I was always so hotheaded. I made quick decisions without thinking, went off whatever mood I was in. I hurt the people I loved… I ruined everything because of my impatience…" he looked off distantly, his face softening, "I don't know, Toboe. Maybe what I had was paradise… I was just never satisfied. I became a lone wolf… I sacrificed my life for a better one… but I found nothing…"

Kalev looked back to the boy, who was now sitting back in his seat as he looked at his hands as he frowned. The old man glanced away, sighing, "By the end of my journey, many years later… I gave up and returned to my pack. I just wanted to have my old life back, including the mate that I loved… But by then, it was too late... He was gone."

Toboe shot his head up then, "He?" he asked. Kalev just smiled as he nodded, looking down at his feet. The boy looked down once more, sighing. He would have never guessed that about the old man. What other stories could he tell him? …No, it was no use. He wouldn't bother him any more… And then he remembered, "But what about the book? Why did you leave it there?" he asked.

Kalev looked up, "…Do you remember me telling you that I dreamt of you and the others?" he asked.

The boy nodded, and so the old man continued, "Well, in that dream I was given a vision… that book was the key to unlocking you and the others… There was a sign with the name, Kingston, on it… a bookstore with golden letters, the windows trimmed with green painted wood. I saw the book, a white wolf, surrounded by white flowers, an old tree on the side of a mountain… along with the rest of you. But the white wolf, he must have led you there… it was him who opened the door, wasn't it?" he looked to the boy, whose eyes were glued on him.

The old man smiled, finishing his story, "At first I thought it was silly… But the next day, Turek informed me that he and I would be traveling for some errands, to a small town outside of a city called Kingston. And that was it…" he yawned, sitting back in his chair.

The boy was about to say something, assuming the man was done talking but he was cut off before he even opened his mouth, "So, Toboe. When are you leaving here?" Kalev asked him, leaning on the table once more.

"Leaving? …I don't… I'm not sure." He looked down, frowning.

"Well, you're still searching, aren't you?" the man asked again, "Or have you given up?"

"But you!" Toboe looked up, surprised by the question, "…You tell me that you gave up because you were convinced it was useless… you made it sound like there is no paradise… that this is it…" he looked down again, "And then you tell me I should go?" he asked. He didn't understand what Kalev was getting at. How did the conversation even go this direction?

"I didn't tell you, I asked you." The man shrugged, "I think you should follow your instincts, your heart…"

"But isn't that what you did? …And it got you nowhere?" he asked.

"What you need to do," the old man paused, "…is stop doubting yourself. This time that you've spent here… you've grown into a young man. Just look at yourself, boy!" he gestured at him and Toboe looked down at himself without thinking, examining his strong arms and legs. He knew that he'd grown; it was obvious every time he looked in a mirror.

"But, there's so much more I can learn here!" the boy insisted.

"You can take true form at will, even without the full moon. You can defend yourself in every way, even hunt. You are a real wolf… There's nothing more I can teach you." Kalev smiled, "The fact of the matter… is that you already know what you were born to do. And your destiny no longer lies within this pack."

Toboe sighed, looking away from him. Kalev was right. Every word he spoke was true. He knew from the very beginning that his time here would never last. Paradise was still out there, waiting for him. He could feel it in his blood. Every single fiber of his being knew it was real. This journey he'd begun was no mistake. And now, it was time that he should return to that road and continue running, just as the wolves in the book.

He looked back to the old man, who had already been watching him. Kalev didn't have to say anything, the man already knew he'd made up his mind. "I'm going to leave in the morning." Toboe spoke, a small part of him sad to say those words. He bit his lip, "What should I tell Miri?"

"The truth, what else?" Kalev replied.

"The truth? She'll think I'm crazy… I could just tell her I'm going back to my mate…" Toboe looked off distantly, frowning.

"Are you?" the old man asked him. The boy shot his head back up, "What? No… why?" he didn't know how to reply to that question. He'd thought about it, yes. But that part of his life was over… wasn't it?

"Toboe, did you know that wolves mate for life?" Kalev asked.

"Yes, I knew that." He frowned, crossing his arms.

"No, you didn't." the man replied plainly, slitting his eyes.

"Okay… maybe not." The boy shrugged, "But… I understand what that means."

"What that means, is that no matter what you do… no matter how much you change or your life changes… is that your heart will always stay the same." Kalev spoke as he stood up from his chair, "Those feelings are something you will always have to live with… So that my boy, is yet another part of your destiny that you should decide on."

"But, I can't…" Toboe looked up at him, "I just can't. You don't understand…" he looked away, frowning as tears began to form in his eyes. He thought that he had moved on, that it didn't hurt him anymore. But that was all a lie, wasn't it?

"Toboe, I may not understand what you've gone through or what your relationship was like… but what I do know, is that wounds do heal… Nothing lasts forever, my son." He frowned, "I understand what it's like to hate, to feel pain, what it's like to love and to have true joy… and I also know what it's like to lose someone you love."

The boy took in every word he said and even though he didn't want to believe him, he accepted it. Time had changed everything, not just what he looked liked, but who he was. It's not that he'd let the old him go, rather improved, grown stronger and braver… just like he'd always wanted to.

Toboe watched as Kalev made his way to the front door. Opening the door, he gestured for the boy who nodded and followed, stepping out the door after him. It was dark out, the only light coming from the lanterns, house windows and one firepit where a few of the pack members were gathered.

The boy saw that Miri and Sera were among them. He couldn't make out their conversation, only see what was taking place. The older boy looked like he was teasing her. Toboe saw the girl push him away from her, just as she tripped over a log behind her. But thankfully, Sera caught her from falling. Miri didn't even try to pull away from, just smiling as she hugged onto him. It was obvious now, the feelings she had spoken about earlier that day…

The older man next to him sighed. "You know that saying, we hurt the ones we love the most? …Well, it's true. The fact is, Toboe… it's impossible to take back what we've done, but it's not impossible to start again… You can't become who you are overnight. It takes time to change a heart. That goes for everyone… even your mate."

Toboe glanced away, not wanting to watch the other wolves anymore. He knew that the old man had been watching the same scene. He also knew what the old man was implying.

But… what had the time done for Tsume? Had he changed too? …So what if he did go back to him? Could he even convince him to search for paradise with him? He had been so set in his mind not to. They'd even gotten into arguments about the matter. As long it had been, maybe things would be different?

He knew that he wasn't really over him… If it was true that wolves mated for life, the same could be said for Tsume. But this was a whole other problem to explore. Was he ready to be back in that relationship again? …No, things could never be the same again between them… could they?

The boy looked back to the old man, the lights of the fire casting shadows on his face. He noticed the deep lines, the wrinkles on his skin and face that told the story of his life. He was so old and worn, tired from the years. "My son…" Kalev spoke, the boy not expecting it. He didn't look at him though, his eyes were still focused on the younger wolves ahead of them.

"You know that I'm not telling you what to do with your life. …My journey is over, your own path is just beginning. I used to pray that God would send me all the answers, but they never came to me until I found that book. That's when everything changed…"

He looked down at his feet, his face softening, "It's when we ignore the road before us, that we miss out on all that life has planned for us… The mistakes we make can be mended, yes… But time doesn't wait for us… My race is almost run… but you still have the chance to pick up where you left off…"

He looked at the boy then, smiling, "I lost my paradise, Toboe. …You should go and find yours."

A few minutes passed between the two of them before the boy replied, "I will, Kalev… and thank you… for everything." He smiled at the older man, who just nodded in return.

Toboe raised his head, gazing up at the stars and moon that filled the summer night sky. Memories of the past flashed through his mind, moments spent with his lover under this same sky.

If he went back, would everything return to the way it was? But…What if Tsume wasn't waiting for him anymore? He could've moved on… went back to his old life… or even started a new one?

He closed his eyes and sighed, thinking to himself, _"Tsume… where are you?"_

* * *

><p>I was going to keep going, but I left it at this... A good place to leave off, I think! What say you? …Also, let me know what you think of the song. ;)<p> 


	22. Chapter 22

:D Yaya! I made it! …Enjoy. ;)

ALSO – Please, please, please listen to the song, "Kingdom Come" by Coldplay. It totally inspired this chapter. It really reminds me of Tsume and Toboe's relationship. I'm including the lyrics because I can't help myself! ;) …But please, listen to the song and lemme know what ya think! :D

~Kingdom Come~

Steal my heart and hold my tongue  
>I feel my time, my time has come<br>Let me in, unlock the door  
>I've never felt this way before<p>

And the wheels just keep on turning  
>The drummer begins to drum<br>I don't know which way I'm going  
>I don't know which way I've come<p>

Hold my head inside your hands  
>I need someone who understands<br>I need someone, someone who hears  
>For you, I've waited all these years<p>

For you I'd wait 'til kingdom come  
>Until my day, my day is done<br>And say you'll come and set me free  
>Just say you'll wait, you'll wait for me<p>

In your tears and in your blood  
>In your fire and in your flood<br>I hear you laugh, I heard you sing  
>I wouldn't change a single thing<p>

And the wheels just keep on turning  
>The drummers begin to drum<br>I don't know which way I'm going  
>I don't know what I'll become<p>

For you I'd wait 'til kingdom come  
>Until my days, my days are done<br>And say you'll come and set me free  
>Just say you'll wait, you'll wait for me<p>

Just say you'll wait, you'll wait for me  
>Just say you'll wait, you'll wait for me<p>

FYI: If you prefer the "uncut" version, please check out adult fanfiction dot net or deviant art.

Caution: Further chapters will contain mature content such as language and yaoi, Tsume/Toboe. Be forewarned.

Disclaimer: I do not own the characters or series of Wolf's Rain. They belong to BONES & Keiko Nobumoto. This story is non-profit for my own and others' enjoyment. Thank you. :)

**Still Waiting**

A loud cheer rang out into the night, the sounds from the crowd raging with chaos in their voices and actions. They were aggressive, arguments breaking out, shoving one another as their angry cries echoed off the cement walls that were cracked, old and worn from the years. The paved ground wasn't any better, figures standing upon the fading remnants of where yellow painted parking spots used to be.

There was a light that flickered overhead, casting shadows over two men that stood in the center of the crowd that continued to cheer them on. Their bodies were beading with sweat, one man's white tank soaking in the moisture from his tanned skin. He held his stance firmly, readying himself for the other man's attack.

Just then, the man swung his fist at him, just barely missing him as he ducked. He smiled as he did so, taking the opportunity to send his own fist into the man's stomach. This sent the man to his knees, followed by the first man slamming his leg down onto the man's back. He fell flat on the ground, a grunt of pain escaping his lips.

The first man smiled again, straightening his stance as the crowd roared wildly. As he stepped back a couple of feet, he heard the sound of something hitting the ground behind him. "Finish him off!" he heard someone shout as he glanced back, seeing the metal rod that had landed next to him. Instead of reaching for it, he ignored it. "That's cheap." He commented.

The second man had begun to gather himself, bringing himself back to his knees. Even though the first man refused to use the rod, he wouldn't be so stupid. He lunged for it, quickly grabbing it, no sooner did he swing it at his competitor. But as he did so, the other man jumped back, avoiding his strike at the same time he kicked him in the side of his face.

The second man cried out in pain, "You fucker!" he screamed.

The other one shrugged, watching as the man struggled to get up. "Come on, you call that a fight?" he teased him.

As the second man stood, he dropped the metal rod, glaring at the first man with daggers in his eyes. He skimmed him over, eyeing up his competition. Yes, the man in front of him was clearly strong, the muscles on his body tight and showing through his white tank drenched in sweat. But silver hair? How old was this guy?

"Don't taunt me, old man." The second one growled.

"Old man?" he laughed as they circled each other, preparing for the next move, "If you call twenty-six old, then sure." He glanced over his opponent, noticing a few lines in his face, "How old are you… old man?" He brought his fists up to his face, glaring as he smiled.

"Then what's with the hair?" the second man yelled, swinging at him and missing.

"Must run in the family. I wouldn't know," the silver haired man replied as he stepped back, "Now quit stalling!" He shouted, his face turning serious.

The second man growled and ran at him, sending his fist flying into his face. It caused the first man to stumble slightly, his face turned away as his attacker smiled. But just as he was about to go in for another move, the silver haired man thrust his elbow up into the man's jaw. He grunted as he was sent stumbling back, just as another punch was thrown into his gut. He cried out when this was followed by a kick to his right leg, causing him to fall to the ground.

The crowd roared wildly at the spectacle. But the man wouldn't go down that easily. As the silver haired man stood over him, he resorted to one last move. Frantically reaching into his back pocket, he pulled out a small pocketknife. As soon as he had it in hand, he swiped it open and began to swing at the man's legs.

But sure enough, the silver haired man dodged the man's drastic moves, jumping back for each swing. He then quickly took his right leg and swung it back before sending it right into the man's jaw, finishing the fight. The hit knocked the second man over, crashing into nearby spectators, who jumped back to keep from joining him on the stained, cracked cement floor.

Everyone was quiet for a moment, not knowing whether it was over or if there was more to come. The silver haired man stood ready for another move, his golden eyes glaring. Finally, a woman nudged the other man who had landed on the ground next to her. When he didn't move, she smiled, "He's out!" she shouted and the crowd went wild again.

The sound of beer bottles being thrown and broken on the cement joined the cheers. A few of the figures waved wads of money in their hands as they laughed and jumped about. Others broke out into fights, a few even throwing punches as they argued with one another. The winning man just moved past the crowd, slipping a hand into his right pocket.

Pulling out a small box, he patted it into his other hand before taking a cigarette from it. He lit it up, inhaling as he noticed a man ahead at the exit of the underground parking lot. The man grinned brightly at him, his hazel eyes beaming. He could hardly make out his face in the dark due to the man's dark skin. As he got closer, the man rubbed his shaved head, laughing.

"An' der ya go!" he smiled, handing him a wad of bills. The silver haired man nodded, taking the pay and stuffing it into his back pocket with a smile. The other man put an arm around him as he laughed, "Yer gonna make us rich, mah bestest friend!" he grinned from ear to ear.

"Nothing but the best for you, Bastian." He smiled back, rolling his eyes as he exhaled the cigarette smoke from his lips.

"Now les get ta goin' a'fore Miss Santianna ends us ours lives." Bastian bit his lip. He nudged his companion along, leaving the scene as the crowd continued about in their chaos. The other just nodded in agreement. What did he care? He was going to die eventually. If it would be at the hands of an angry woman, than so be it.

…

"Where the hell have you two been?" a woman's voice shouted angrily. She slammed a glass bottle on the counter top, scowling as the two men entered the front door. The one with dark skin walked right up to her, glancing around at the few customers who were there. The bar looked empty tonight, but that wasn't anything out of the ordinary. It was small and not in the best of locations.

"Aww, Miss Santianna, mah love!" he smiled at the woman as he approached her. She was wiping down the counters, arranging glasses and bottles as if she was trying to ignore him. He sat down on a barstool, rubbing his shaved head. "S'only nine o'clock. An' Sam's here fo' yah!" He nodded over the woman's shoulder to another man past her.

The other man was working in the kitchen behind the bar and didn't look up. Working with the dishes and stove top, it was obvious he didn't want to get involved in the argument. The first man frowned for a moment before looking back to the woman with a sheepish grin. "Mah most beautiful sistah, der's no reason tah be-"

"I don't wanna hear it! Yer using this poor man just for some extra cash!" Santianna yelled, gesturing to the silver haired man behind him. "Street fighting, betting with all kinds of dangerous people… Yer gonna gets yourselves killed! Or worse," she growled, "My bar will get torn up by yer shady friends! Are ya stupid?" A few of the customers were now looking at the scene, the man backing down from her in embarrassment. He put his hands up, grinning with fear.

"Just get to work, Bastian." She sighed, closing her eyes as she pulled her dreaded hair back and tied it up. Bastian nodded, still smiling as he stood up and walked to the kitchen to join the other man in his duties. "I swear ta God. He thinks just cuz' he's my brother he can behave like a child?" Santi growled when he left. "And Sam ain't much better… not even saying a thing or lending me a hand to deal with 'em."

The man with silver hair was trying his best to keep out of it, as he had remained quiet during the entire argument between the three siblings. But just as he was about to slip past her, she looked up at him with a scowl, "You think you're off the hook?"

"You look like hell, Tsume." She commented as she grabbed his chin when he passed her. She jerked his face to each side, "Blood and cuts all over you, your face... And your hair's a mess." She spoke as she examined him, reaching up to ruffle his hair. She groaned, letting go of his chin with a rough push.

The man nodded with a small smile, "Good evening to you too, Santi."

"Go wash up! I don't want you scaring away my customers." She snapped back at him, pointing in the direction of the back of the bar.

Tsume nodded and did so, straightening his jaw with his hand. It was still a little sore from the fight and now worse from Santi's rough handling. But he knew she didn't mean it, the way she'd spoken to him. Yes, she could angry sometimes but it was mostly because of her brothers. The bar belonged to her; she'd worked very hard to get it and was proud of that.

Bastian and Sam did care for her, but he honestly thought that they took advantage of the situation way too often. It wasn't just tardiness, but everything from borrowing money to leaving her with a lot of work. She had to be rough with them, or they'd really walk all over her.

Although… Tsume wasn't innocent either. He could blame Bastian for getting him involved in those fights, but… he would be lying if he said he didn't like it. Fighting came to him easily. It was second nature, having grown up with it. Yes, it was shady just as Santi had said, but it was good money.

When he'd made it to the men's room, he went to one of the sinks and turned on the faucet. As he let the water get warmer, his thoughts began to take him places. He remembered another running faucet from long ago, bruised skin and warm tears… the words, "I love you." …How long had it been since he'd seen that face?

With a grown, he pulled his white tank up and over his tanned muscles, hanging it on the doorknob. He then cupped the warm water into his hands and splashed it onto himself as he bent over. Squirting a couple drops of soap into the water, he began to wash his face, neck and chest.

Grabbing a paper towel and wetting it down, he continued to sponge himself off. As he closed his eyes, he regained his thoughts, realizing how long it had been. A year had gone by, at least.

Sighing, he stood straight up, now seeing his reflection in the mirror as he ran the wet paper towel over his sweat, bruises and cuts. He had been scarred here and there to begin with, but now he had a collection it seemed. Aside from the large scar on his chest from his previous life, he now had various scars of different sizes on his body from street fighting. He then noticed another one on his right shoulder.

That was so long ago, but it didn't feel like it… Those men were after them. He could recall running through the streets and yelling back at the kid to hurry up, dodging flying bullets as they went. He closed his eyes once more, remembering the sounds of the city, frantic and angry voices yelling after them as gunshots were fired. He could remember the smell of the blood from his wounds, not only on his arm, but the slash on his left thigh from when one of the guys came at him with a knife.

He remembered hiding in that alleyway, those few minutes they shared that seemed like hours. He could still smell the rain as it fell down upon them, soaking into their clothes and hair. Those tender hazel eyes, that innocent expression as he looked up at him. He was there now all over again, pressing up against that fragile body, into that brick wall.

His lips were soft as they welcomed him, slowly parting ways after a few moments. "Oh, Tsume…" the boy breathed, gazing at him with such tenderness as he kissed him once more. And now without realizing it, he brought his left hand to his face, tracing his fingertips across his lips.

Tsume could remember everything… the sweet smell of peaches, the soft touch of his auburn locks, the sound of his joyful voice, the look of innocence on his face whenever he blushed… He remembered the many times he had taken him into his arms, not just through tender embracing but during the passionate moments they had shared.

Blushing, he could still recall the boy on his lap, his arms and legs wrapped around his strong body as they moved together. They were bare, entwined in lust and heat with sweat beading on their skin. The boy moaned as the man gripped onto him, holding him in place as he watched that innocent face of his. He had soft tears in his eyes, his face flushed as he cried out his name, welcoming another wet kiss from his lover…

Opening his eyes once more, he found himself staring into the mirror in front of him. He didn't have the time to lose himself right now… He ran his hand away from his lips, up over his face and then through his hair. He smoothed back the strands of silver to see his golden eyes. He looked so different now, having not even cut it since those days.

He wondered what the boy looked like now, if he had changed the way he had? Did he still look the same way the day he let him go? …He could remember everything about him… Did he ever stop to remember him?

Toboe…

Leaning his head against the bathroom mirror, he groaned. He couldn't think about it anymore… not right now.

Deciding to take one last break before he got to work, he dried himself off and reached for his shirt that still hung on the doorknob. When he opened the door, he could hear Sam and Bastian arguing. It was most likely about the menu, ingredients, duties… or all of the above. But whatever it was, he didn't want to get involved.

With a smile, he was successfully able to quietly and slowly slip past the kitchen through the back hallway. When he finally made it out the back door, he sighed, releasing the tension that had built up inside of him. He didn't need their family stress; it wasn't his problem. And he didn't need to get lost in memories tonight.

He'd spent enough nights thinking about the kid, why he'd gone, where he'd gone… if he was safe… But what did it matter? That was his decision to leave. And it was his decision to let him go… a flightless bird, finally set free so he could learn to fly.

Leaning against the brick wall behind him, he reached into his pocket to pull out his cigarettes. Yes, he'd even managed to take up a new habit aside from the fighting. It was a good way to relieve his anger and stress… God knows he needed that. Placing a cigarette between his lips, he lit it up and inhaled.

It was a few moments later when he blew out the smoke, that he heard the sound of a screened door creak open and close, slamming back into place with a thud. He looked up, seeing Santi leaning against the brick wall. She wouldn't look at him as she bit her lip, fidgeting with her apron. "Forgive me," she frowned, "I didn't mean to get that angry with you… It was mostly my brother I was upset with. I was just worried that-"

"Don't be. You're right." Tsume cut off her sentence. The woman looked at him as he approached her, his golden eyes glowing in the dark night. She blushed when his face came into full view under the alley light, smiling at her. Looking down again, she listened as he spoke again, leaning against the wall by her side. "This was the last night. I'm done."

Santi looked at him once more, "Bastian's not happy… but I got what I need now. It won't be long." He shrugged plainly, exhaling smoke into the night air.

"What are you talking about?" she asked him, curious about his words and somber tone.

"I'm leaving town." He inhaled on the cigarette again, waiting a few moments before he exhaled again.

Santi frowned, looking down to the ground, "I see."

Tsume glanced over at her. He would have assumed that she'd be upset, possibly even angry. But she was smiling. Santi laughed a little, leaning her head back against the wall. "I knew that you wouldn't stay here forever. You know… ever since the day you walked into my shitty little bar… I knew it wouldn't last forever." She paused for a moment before glancing at him, "…So what is it then, Tsume? Where are you going? And why?"

Looking away, he took another drag on his cigarette. He had never told her why he'd come here in the first place, his past… nothing. All that she and the others knew was what they saw. That was it.

"I just gotta keep moving. It's been too long since I've been sitting here…" he frowned, "I'm getting uneasy." He blew out the smoke, his memories finding him once more. Looking over to her, he saw that her facial expressions were curious as she leaned against the wall. Could he tell her more than that? It was clear that she wanted answers.

"How long has it been?" he asked her.

"Six months or so…." Santi smiled, "I won't make you stay. But we've had a good run, I think. I know my boys are grateful to you… helping them with their work." She sneered in the direction of the door. "Stupid idiots…" she looked back to him, "I'll miss you though."

"You will." He smirked.

She laughed, "You're an ass."

Tsume smiled, stomping out the burnt down cigarette on the ground. The woman stood straight, stretching as she yawned. "Well it's late enough that I think I'll close up here soon. Not many customers tonight… at all." She frowned, "Maybe I'll go with you. We'll find us a new place to settle down in, open up our own restaurant together… no bar this time. Just a good old fashioned family place… without my brothers." She laughed.

He didn't reply, not knowing what to say to that. Was she serious?

Santi caught his expression and immediately put her hands up in defense, "I'm joking!" she laughed again, before turning serious as she looked down, "I'll never leave here…"

Tsume still didn't say anything.

"Well!" she declared, smiling again, "I'm gonna head in there and finish up. If you want, you can go home." She looked him up and down, putting her hands on her hips, "You really do look like hell." She commented, gesturing at his bruises and cuts, his hair still a mess.

"Yeah," he groaned, standing up straight and putting his hands in his pockets, "It's a living."

Santi only nodded in reply, giving him a thumbs-up as she opened the screen door, reentering the bar with a smile. "All right," he heard he yelling inside, "Early night tonight! Thank the heavens, not me!" Her announcement was followed by cries of agreement and happiness. It made him smile a little, sighing as he looked up to the night sky.

He couldn't see the stars here either. This city and the last, as well as the one before… the one he'd left in the first place. He looked down, frowning. Is this what his life had come to? He'd been on the run for a year now, going from place to place, taking on a new life each time. He was tired.

As he began walking through the alleyways, he reached into his left pocket for his cigarettes.

It was nice here. He'd come to like the people he was around… But once again, it was time to go.

The six months he'd spent here had gone by so fast that he didn't even notice home he'd begun to settle in. But he couldn't do that. He was still in hiding… He felt like a coward, but… he was tired of fighting. He was surprised at himself, for not taking on such challenge… He really did hope that Keith would have given up by now.

But when he saw him in the last city, he knew that was just wishful thinking. That man wasn't going to let up anytime soon. For God's sake, he'd killed his little sister… he may not have let him go so easily either. But… a part of him wondered if he deserved this.

Keith and his men were on his trail. He didn't know how… but he would never be able to rest because of what he'd done. But… he'd escaped the last city before they even saw him. He was lucky enough to get away. And it was his own fault. This was the path, the life he'd chosen for himself.

It was the reason that brought him here and it was the same reason he was now leaving… Wasn't it?

Or was there something else inside of him… something that called him to keep moving? Was it more than escaping his death? Was he really running away… or was he running towards something? Someone?

The sound of a can being kicked echoed into the night, waking him up out of his thoughts. He glanced down the alleyway from where it had come, his golden eyes slit with curiosity. As he stopped in his tracks, he hadn't even noticed that the cigarette between his fingers had almost burnt down completely, it's ashes dangling. He stepped forward, bringing it to his mouth before realizing the ashes were against his skin now. He bit his lip, tossing it to the ground.

He looked back up. Something wasn't right. He could feel it on the back of his neck. He kept looking into the darkness, knowing that he was being watched. And even though he knew he'd just been thinking of him, he knew that it couldn't be Keith. Could it?

"Who's there?" he called, his tone serious. "Come out, NOW." He commanded.

"Tsume, right?" a voice replied.

He turned around as a man approached him from behind, stepping into the alleyway from the other end. He smiled, his hands in his pockets. He stopped in front of him, just as two other men walked out of the darkness on the opposite end of the alleyway.

"Who wants to know?" Tsume growled in reply, readying himself for anything.

"Don't be hasty. I'm just here to collect a debt." The man answered.

A debt? Of course… this was Bastian's fault. Dammit! …He knew he was making a lot of bets, but they hadn't lost one fight. He thought he was in the clear… Unless this was from something else… Shit.

"I don't owe you anything. Now get lost." Tsume sneered, just as he felt a hand on his shoulder, pulling him back. In that moment he swung around, hurling his fist into the man's face that had grabbed him. Another man came for him as the first one stumbled back. Tsume dodged his attack and smiled, quickly stepping to the right, sending his foot into the man's side.

But just when he thought he had control of the situation, he felt a blunt object ramming down upon his back. He cried out in pain and stumbled against the wall. When he began to find his footing, he felt a fist driven into his stomach. He choked and clutched onto himself as he heard the same voice say, "Surprised? …You're not as tough as you think."

Shit… These men were not to be taken lightly. "What do you want from me?" he groaned, standing back up. Just then, the man's forearm rammed into his neck, sending him flying into the brick wall behind him. He immediately struggled to break free, but was punched in the stomach again by another man. He gasped for air, as the hit was even harder this time.

"Fuck!" he cried.

The first man leaned in next to him, smiling, "You seem like you're going to a bit of trouble from here on out… I'd love to kill you right now, you know… But those weren't the orders."

Tsume's eyes widened. "What the fuck are you talking about? What orders? Who sent you?" he breathed. But he already knew the answers to his questions. Before he could ask anything more, the man pulled back from him, allowing another one to step in and grab onto him. He sent him flying into a dumpster behind them and he crashed into it.

Regardless, he quickly brought himself back up and swung around, attempting to defend himself. But it was useless. He immediately was caught off guard by one of the men's knees thrust into his jaw. He fell back onto the ground with a thud, groaning when he landed.

Instead of attempting another move, even though he had it in him… he didn't. He lay on the ground, remaining still as the three men gathered around him. He could have kept going at this point, so why didn't he? Was it that he had given up? Was he ready to accept his punishment, the payment for his sins? …Or was it instinct?

They stood over him, talking amongst themselves. "Really? Was that it?" one asked. "I thought he said he'd be a challenge?"

"Never mind that!" the first man replied with a huff, "Just go get the car… Now!"

Tsume kept his face pressed into the ground, laying still as he listened to hurried footsteps running down the alleyway. Surely he could handle just the remaining two… but no. He didn't want to.

It was moments later when he heard a car pull up, its engine rumbling a ways off. "There he is." The first man spoke, "Help me get him to the car." He could hear them stepping over to him, their shoes scratching the pavement next to his head. But just as rough hands were placed on his arms, something inside of him snapped.

A loud and vicious snarl sounded into the night, followed by a man's cries of terror. "What the fuck?" he screamed, falling into the man behind him. The two men scrambled to get back up, the first one growling at the other, "Get off me!" he yelled. The second one did so, quickly standing up as the third man came running down the alleyway. "What's wrong? Did something happen?" he asked as he ran up to them.

The first man stood up, fixing his glasses and looking around. The man was gone. And what had happened? It seemed like a blur now; everything had happened so quickly. Did he really see what he thought he saw?

If that really was the case, that man had turned into some sort of animal… Or was it that the man's dog came to his rescue? It was very dark…

"What the fuck was that?" the second man asked as he turned to him, "Fuck if I know. Come on. We still have a job to do." He growled, stamping back to the car. The two men only nodded, still in shock. They reluctantly followed their leader, leaving the alleyway empty behind them.

Only they didn't know the beast still stood there in the shadows, still watching them as they disappeared out of sight. He snorted, his golden eyes glowing as he turned in the other direction. Wincing, he realized his ribs and jaw still hurt from where they'd landed hits into him. But it didn't matter. He was tougher than to let that get to him.

With a hurried step, the wolf continued on his way, venturing in and out of the alleyways. When he moved beyond the alleyways and to a street, he saw that there were a few people around. It wasn't too busy, but it was enough that he could strike up a scare. Avoiding the streetlights, he remained in the shadows to stay hidden.

He could see the apartment building now, just a couple of blocks down from where he was. He ran faster now, anxiously wanting to get home and gather his things so that he could leave. He knew those men were not one of Bastian's bad bets… they worked for Keith. He was sure of that. It wasn't about money. It was about revenge.

The grey animal now approached the back door of the building. A red neon sign glowed overhead, flickering on and off. He looked down at himself then, realizing that he'd already taken his human form once again. Sighing, he was surprised and at the same time thankful.

Tsume opened the back door, hurriedly running up the steps. When he'd finally made it to the third floor and down the hall to his apartment, he slowed his steps. It was when he inserted his keys into the lock, that he realized the door was open and unlocked.

His eyes widened and he began to panic. Had they followed him here? Even as a wolf? It couldn't be, could it?

He'd waited too long this time. He'd been thinking of leaving for a couple of weeks now just to be safe… but he'd taken too much time to decide. Were they in here waiting for him? Surely. He'd open the door and that'd be it.

He stepped back, growling. He had to do it. He had to pay the price.

Reaching for the doorknob, he frowned. He couldn't back down now. As he creaked the door open, he heard a voice inside, "Tsume?"

Pushing the door all the way open, he saw his friend standing there. "Santi," he breathed as he closed the door behind him. "Oh my God! What did you do?" she asked upon seeing him, fresh cuts and blood trickling from his lips and nose. She rushed over to him as he bit his lip, leaning against the door. "You didn't get into another fight, did you?" she snapped, "I thought you said that it was all over, you said-"

"It is." He replied.

Santi stepped back, "Then what-"

"I've got people after me." He spoke as she watched him lock the door behind him. He moved past her and to the bedroom, "It's not safe here. I've got to go."

"Tsume…" she breathed as she followed after him, watching him quickly stuffing clothes and other things into a backpack. "What are you talking about? Is it Bastian's-"

"No!" he replied, turning to her, "It's something else… You need to go…" he looked down as she picked up the conversation, "You listen to me. I was worried about you so I came over here to finish our talk …and now you go and tell me to get out! Well fuck you!" He looked at her as she frowned at him, hands on her hips. "Santi…" he breathed, "I'm sorry…"

She sighed, waving after him as she left the bedroom. He bit his lip and followed her out as she made her way to the kitchen. He watched as she opened up the refrigerator door and quickly pulled out two beers. She turned around, holding them, "At least have one more beer with me before you go, okay?" she smiled this time.

The man sighed, looking to the side as he ran a hand through his messy silver hair, "Santi…"

"Please, Tsume. For old times sake?" she asked, putting the bottles on the countertop and popping the tops off. She handed him one of the beers, "Hurry, it's gonna run over."

He only nodded, rolling his eyes and taking a big gulp.

"You never did tell me why you were leaving… I take it it's these people that are after you?" she asked him, leaning against the counter and taking a sip of her beer. "But… it's more than that, right?"

Tsume walked over to the sofa and sat down, noticing that she followed him and did the same. He looked over to her, frowning. It seemed like yesterday that he'd first met her. He'd never really opened up to her before. And now here she was, acting like she was his friend. It was never like that… What did she see in him?

"There's something different about you, Tsume." He looked at her as she spoke, "You know… You're unlike anyone I've ever known." She smiled, looking down as she leant over her knees, holding the beer bottle in both hands.

"How do you mean?" he asked her, taking another sip.

"I don't know, you're just different…" she gulped down another drink, exhaling and wiping her mouth before she continued, "It's funny… Don't judge me… but it seems like ever since I met you, I've been having the same dreams over and over."

"Really?" Now he was curious.

"White flowers… and wolves." She pauses for a moment, "Weird, huh?"

Honestly, he couldn't believe what he was hearing. "It's always so beautiful… Even thinking of it now," she closed her eyes and continued, "It's so real every time… I can still feel the warmth of the sun upon my back, the soft touch of the grass and flowers, running with those animals…" she looked at him, his eyes wide.

"What?" she laughed a little, before looking away once more, "Okay, so there's my secret… Now you tell me yours."

Tsume sighed, returning to the troubling matter at hand. "I'm leaving as soon as I finish this beer." He took another sip as the woman nodded, "That's all I ask." She replied.

He smiled a little, "I've got some unfinished business… The men who are after me… I made some bad decisions…" he looked away, frowning.

"Bad decisions, huh? Sounds like everyone I know… That doesn't tell me anything." She sighed.

"I've killed people, Santi."

This made her look at him, her expression worried. She didn't reply, so he continued. "You can think what you want to... There's no excuse for the things I've done and now I'm paying the price. Simple as that." He sighed, "That's why I have to keep going. Not only am I running from the inevitable, I'm sparing your lives from keeping you out of it."

A familiar face came to his mind and he frowned, biting his lip, "I've made my mistakes. And I've paid for them… every time." He glanced away, his thoughts racing through violent images and angry words. All that followed was regret.

Looking down at his beer, he realized he had only one sip left. He smiled, finishing it off before he continued, "Everyone I get close to gets hurt. And so… because of that, I have to go." He stood up, slinging the backpack over his shoulder. He sat the empty beer bottle down on the table before he paused and turned back to look at her, "But I do want to say thanks, for everything."

When she didn't reply, he frowned and made his way to the door. He looked back one more time, her hands still clutched around the bottle, looking at the floor. Turning to the door, she spoke up, "You're welcome." He glanced her way. She was smiling at him, "And thanks to you too. You've helped us more than you think, Tsume. So… good luck to you!"

Tsume smiled as well, "No worries," he nodded, opening the door.

But it was then that he was caught off guard. No sooner that he glanced around after opening the door, that a sharp knife was slashed across his face. He cried out in pain, his blood splattering onto the door as he stumbled backwards, clutching onto his face.

"TSUME!" Santi's voice cried, followed by a loud gunshot that echoed into the night.

…

The booming sound of thunder rang out, waking the boy from his sleep. He yelped loudly, quickly sitting up. The house was completely dark, aside from the flashes of lightening that came in through the window, lighting up the room. When he realized he was awake now, he brought a hand up to his chest. His heart was beating wildly.

Glancing around the darkened house, he felt that he should have calmed down by now. It was just the storm outside. He wanted to lay down and close his eyes, go back to sleep. But he couldn't… Something wasn't right.

He didn't know why he felt this way… but he knew there was something wrong.

Groaning, he brought a hand up to his head and leaned into it. He could hear the thunder echoing again outside, the rain pelting down upon the roof and windows. The man's face kept coming to his mind, images not from his memories but of something else. Before he'd woken up, he'd seen blood, heard screams… He was beginning to worry himself now.

He had to go… now. He couldn't wait until morning…

Throwing back his blanket, he quickly stepped out of bed and onto the rug. He crouched down to the ground, trying to find what he was looking for under the bed. It only took a second or two before he pulled out his backpack.

It was then that he heard a muffled noise from across the room. Looking over, he saw the old man asleep in his chair. Frowning, he proceeded to quickly and quietly pack his things. He wondered… he must have fallen asleep there last night because he was too tired to make it back to his bedroom. He'd been doing that a lot lately.

When the boy finished packing and changing his clothes, he quietly stepped over to the old man whose chair wasn't but a foot from the door. He watched him as he slept, his breathing raspy. A part of him wished he could stay here and remain as part of the pack. Poor Kalev was so kind to him… saving his life, mentoring him, even sharing his home with him. He wanted to stay here and take of him… he deserved that.

But he couldn't. And even Kalev knew that it was time for him to continue his journey. He was even the one who told him so. …This man had done so much for him. He'd come to care for him so deeply, that he knew he would never forget him… for what he'd taught him, the things he'd showed him… He would always remember.

The boy sighed before reluctantly reaching into his backpack. Pulling out an old and tattered book, he gently placed it on the man's lap. It was the least he could do… he didn't need it anymore.

"Goodbye, my friend." He whispered with a smile, opening the door and stepping outside. He quietly shut it behind him, glancing around the village. He couldn't leave just yet. He had one more thing to do.

The rain had begun to let up, the thunder and lightening moved on away from where the village was. The boy quickly ran to a few houses down from where he stood. As he approached the front door, he bit his lip. She was angry with him that night… that he told her he was leaving.

It was planned that in the morning he would give his final goodbyes to the pack, but now everything had changed. But… he couldn't just leave it at that.

He reluctantly knocked on the door, only softly hitting it. No answer came for a few minutes, so he knocked once more, this time a little louder. And once again, no answer came. He began knocking louder and louder, practically wailing on the wooden door. Finally, he cried out, "MIRI!"

"OPEN THE DOOR!" he felt embarrassed, even regretful. But he couldn't miss seeing her one last time.

It was when a couple of minutes went by that he decided to let up. He also noticed a few lights coming on in the other houses. Great. Whether he liked it or not, he'd caused a scene. He wanted to run by now, hoping that no one came out to give him a hard time.

But just as he began to walk away, he heard the door being creaked open. He quickly turned around, seeing his friend in a nightgown. She stepped out under the roof, avoiding the slight drizzle as she rubbed her eyes. "I'm only answering because Gran made me…" she spoke plainly, then she growled, switching her tone, "…What the hell? Do you have any idea what time it is? This couldn't have waited until morn-"

The girl was cut off in mid-sentence when she felt the boy's arms thrown around her, pulling her into an embrace. Her eyes were wide at first, her body frozen as he hugged onto her. For a few moments they stood there in the silence, the girl not moving as he held her tightly. And then, her face softened, tears appearing in her eyes.

"Oh, Toboe," she cried, hugging him back. "Why do you have to go?"

"I'm sorry… I don't want to go." He replied, still holding onto her, "But… this is something I have to do, Miri. I have to continue searching…"

The girl pulled back from him then, wiping the tears from her eyes. She looked him up and down, soaked from the rain, his backpack strapped over his shoulders. Sighing, she looked down, "You came to say goodbye, didn't you?" she glanced back to him, smiling.

"Yes, I'm leaving right now. It can't wait until morning… I just had to see you one last time." He frowned.

"You're crazy, you know."

"I know… I just feel… I'm worried, Miri." His eyes met hers and she nodded, "It's ok," she spoke, "You do what you have to do. But…" she clasped her hands together, "Please don't forget about me…" She began to get teary again and looked away from him, biting her lip.

Toboe felt sorry for her, leaving her in this place. She hated it. He bit his lip as well, before an idea came to him, "Come with me!" he grabbed her hands.

"What?" she asked, her face surprised.

"Come with me, Miri! To paradise!" he smiled.

However, she wouldn't look at him, "I can't…" she muttered, "I can't leave him… I just can't."

Toboe frowned when she tore her hands away from him, wrapping them around herself. He didn't want to do what he was about to do, but he couldn't see her like this. This wasn't the Miri he knew. "All right then, we'll go get him." He nodded.

Miri looked up at him, "What?"

"He'll go with us! To paradise!" The boy was determined, his hands balled up into fists. But it was then that the two teenagers heard someone approaching out of the darkness. Both of them looked up, seeing the black haired boy standing a few feet away from them, the rain pelting down upon his hair and clothes.

"What are you trying to pull?" he scowled at the younger boy.

Toboe shook his head, "N-nothing!"

"Like hell!" came the angry reply.

This set the other boy off, he wasn't about to take this lying down. This was just typical Sera. "I'm not trying to pull anything! I just thought that we could all go together! I-"

"Fuck you!" the black wolf snarled as he lunged at the boy. Toboe had luckily saw the attack coming and dodged it, barely missing him. He quickly turned around, his own body now in wolf form. He bared his fangs at Sera, preparing himself in an attack stance. "Just listen to me, Sera! If we all go to paradi-"

"That's bullshit! You're filling her head with lies! You're delusional! There's no such thing as paradise!" the black wolf growled.

"What? Haven't you even heard a word Kalev said?" the red wolf tried to reason with him, "How can you say that? You call yourself a wolf?"

That was it. The black wolf lunged at him with a snarl, managing to clip the younger one's shoulder as he moved past. The red wolf winced in pain, stumbling back. The older one turned around, readying himself to make the next move. "You've had this coming." He muttered viciously, slowly making his way to him. Toboe snarled at him, preparing himself as he ignored the pain in his shoulder.

"STOP IT!" Miri's voice shrieked, "Sera, you can't kill him!"

The black wolf looked back to the girl, glaring, "Why not?" he turned back to the red wolf, a few feet in front of him. "It'd be worth the trouble…" He bared his teeth, snorting as he moved closer, his hackles raised.

"Stop it! He already has a mate!" the girl tried to reason with him.

"Then why's he gotta be sniffin' around mine?" It was no use. With a snarl, the older wolf lunged for the red wolf, aiming for his throat. But it was then that he was sent off his goal by something knocked into his side, sending him flying. With a grunt, he landed into the muddy grass. He growled, quickly bringing himself back to his feet.

The black wolf's yellow eyes glowed, seeing the white and silver wolf before him. She stood in front of the red one, her teeth bared at him. "You listen to me!" she growled, "I don't belong to anyone! Not this pack, not YOU!" She took a step forward then, "I will never be with you until I see you change this! You can't keep acting like this! …You need to grow up!"

Sera glared at her for a while, no longer snarling. He looked away after a few minutes, standing down from the fight.

"Sera…" Miri's voice softened and he looked up once more, "I don't hate you. I love you…" she turned back to Toboe, who was not cowering but standing straight. "And that's why… I can't go with you. It's not just him…" She smiled at him, glancing down.

The white and silver wolf then walked over to the black one, joining his side, "This is our pack, Toboe. I have to stay here with them… they're my family." Sera looked down at her as she spoke, his face softening as well.

"I understand, Miri." Toboe nodded, "But maybe we'll find each other again someday. Who knows…"

"Yes, maybe." The white and silver wolf smiled, "I would love that."

The boy now appeared in human form once more, going over to pick up his backpack. He strapped it back on and stood up straight. The rain was still coming down, but only a slight drizzle. Before he left, he turned back to the two wolves, waving at them, "Thanks again, for everything…" When no reply came, he just nodded, "Well… I'm off!"

"Just go then. Go search for your stupid paradise." The black wolf growled.

But it didn't matter. In his heart, he'd already forgiven him. If Miri could love him, then the least he could do was try to understand. He didn't know what Sera's life had been like until now… But, he had other things to do now.

As he walked away from the village, the rain soaking into his clothes and hair, he clutched the backpack over his shoulders and smiled. It had been a nice vacation from his life. He was grateful for the times he had, the things he'd learned, the friends he'd made… He'd grown so much, not only in appearance, but in his heart. He'd changed… he could no longer hold onto the things that made him weak.

Paradise was still waiting for him… and maybe… someone else too.

* * *

><p>) I can't wait until the next chapter, can you?<p> 


	23. Chapter 23

Please check out my deviant art account- /~dearmisskitty … I uploaded this chapter, as well as a fanart of what Tsume and Toboe look like since they've aged... among other fanart. ;)

:D Otherwise… Enjoy! Comments please-they only inspire me to write faster. ;)

FYI: If you prefer the "uncut" version, please check out adult fanfiction dot net or deviant art.

Caution: Further chapters will contain mature content such as language and yaoi, Tsume/Toboe. Be forewarned.

Disclaimer: I do not own the characters or series of Wolf's Rain. They belong to BONES & Keiko Nobumoto. This story is non-profit for my own and others' enjoyment. Thank you. :)

**Together**

"What?!" the boy exclaimed, throwing his hands on the counter.

"Like I said, there are no buses at this hour, son." The man sighed, rubbing his temples. "You'll have to wait until morning."

The boy grimaced, "Do you know when the first bus gets here?"

"Nine o'clock… Which is seven hours from now…" came the weary reply. He could tell the boy in front of him was anxious and in a hurry for reasons he did not know. He smiled, trying to make up for the current predicament, "If you like, I can call the town motel and get you a room for the night?"

"Thanks, but I should get going…"

The man glanced over his shoulder at the storm, which was still coming down outside. He frowned, "In that? How? Are you going to get a ride?"

Sighing, the boy turned around and stepped over to the window. He sighed, leaning against the wall as he watched the rain dripping from the roof, street drains swallowing the rushing water as soon as it poured down. "If I can…" he frowned, "If I have to, I'll walk."

"Son, the next town is twenty miles from here! Please," he spoke, "Let me get you a room." He picked up the phone next to him, proceeding to dial before he heard a bell chime. Looking up, he shook his head, seeing that the boy had already left.

As he ran across the street, he pulled his jacket hood over his head, trying to avoid getting too wet. He proceeded to make his way out of town, walking hurriedly past the small shops and businesses, all closed for the night.

The night wind howled, the rain soaking into his clothes as he clutched his backpack over his shoulders. This would be the last time he'd ever set foot in this town, the last time he'd ever see Miri and the others. This was it.

He didn't even look back as he ventured east, following the highway that would lead him to his destination. His thoughts raced to a familiar face and he smiled. But all though his decision was made, to find him again… he was still afraid. What changes had taken place? Was he still there?

Shaking his head, he nodded in determination.

"I'm coming, Tsume. …Please wait for me."

…

The ceiling fan blades whirred around very slowly, their sound inaudible. He laid on the ground, blankly staring at the ceiling. His mind was beginning to recall what had happened and where he was…

Everything around him seemed like it was going in slow motion. He couldn't hear anything either aside from muffled noises. Had he lost his hearing? …That gunshot. It must have gone off right by him. Was he hit? He couldn't feel anything …

And what was more… he could only see out of his right eye. He slowly brought his hand up to touch his face. He could feel the slashed flesh beneath his fingertips, tracing it from his lower lip to his left brow. His left eye had already swollen shut.

When he pulled his hand back to look, it was covered in dripping in his blood.

He groaned, beginning to feel the pain now taking place. He then began to hear the muffled noises turn into voices. Turning his head to the side, he saw Santi lying on the ground a few feet away from him. Her expression was blank, her eyes hollow as blood dripped from her lifeless body.

Frowning in anger, he realized that she was dead, a gunshot wound gaping wide open in her chest.

He could feel that there were others in the apartment with him. The sound of rummaging through drawers and cabinets could be heard from the other rooms. Glancing to his right, he saw one man lurking through his refrigerator. "Hey, did you find anything of worth?" he called out, grabbing a bottle of beer.

They didn't know he was conscious, did they?

"Yeah!" a man's voice answered back, coming into the room. "What do ya think?"

The man on the ground's eyes widened when he heard the familiar clinking sound. It was the kid's silver bracelets. He'd forgotten to pack them in his bag… His mind began playing memories in his head once more… those bracelets being the only thing he'd left behind. Had it been an accident? …Or was it on purpose?

Even if it wasn't intentional, he'd kept them with him until now. Every now and then, he would pull out the drawer by his bed and pull out those silver bracelets. He'd play with them in his hands, examining the scratches and listening to clinking sounds they made as he remembered what he had lost.

And now, he wanted those bracelets back. They were worth more to him than anything.

He could feel the numbness fading from his body, the pain increasing in his face. As he closed his eyes, he could feel his pulse racing. What would be the plan now?

"Sure, they might get something." the first man's voice answered, "Any money?"

"No… maybe in his bag?"

He could hear the second man walking over to him, a continued search still going on in another room by the third man. Could he take all three men, regardless of his wounds?

"I'm gonna see what he's doing… We're not getting paid by the hour." the first man spoke, the sounds his steps leaving the room.

This was his chance.

As soon as the second man bent over to check his backpack, he shot his eyes open, causing the man to gasp. In that second, he quickly grabbed the man's legs, pulling them out from under him. The man landed with a heavy thud, a black boot suddenly crashing into his head, knocking him unconscious before he could call for help.

"What's going on?" a man's voiced called out from the other room.

The silver haired man bit his lip, bending over to pick up the silver bracelets that the second man had dropped when he was attacked. Quickly slipping them onto his left wrist, he grabbed his backpack and hurriedly took off out the front door.

As he made his way down the flights of stairs, he could hear the men in the apartment above him, "SHIT! SHIT! SHIT!"

This made him run faster, making it out the front door and onto the street. Immediately he saw a black jeep parked on the curb, the doors taken off the sides. He further saw that the keys were in the ignition. This must have been their car.

Hearing hurried footsteps from inside the apartment building, he made an impulsive decision. He threw his backpack in the front seat, quickly jumping in next to it and starting the vehicle. He didn't look back as he took off. They were stupid to leave their car like this. How could he have been so lucky?

But no… he wasn't lucky.

He groaned, biting his lip as he thought of his friend, Santi… her body still lying on the floor of his apartment... It was his fault.

But wait! What about Bastian and Sam?!

Horns blared wildly as the jeep suddenly swerved right and made its way, turning sharp around a corner with a screech. The man drove as fast as he could, making his way back to the restaurant. The streets were busy that night, the lights and people blurring past the jeep in a colorful whirr.

What seemed like hours were only minutes before he finally pulled up, parking the jeep on the curb. He hurried pulled the keys out of the ignition, jumping out and running into the building. The bar door swung open, revealing what he was worried about.

There lay Bastian, his body slung over the counter as blood dripped down the wood paneling. He ran over to him, hoping to do something but it was too late. When he approached him, he saw that his throat was slit open, the blood now caked and dried around the wound.

He moved the lifeless body off the counter and laid it on the ground. "I'm sorry…" The man grimaced, the guilt beginning to overwhelm him.

It was then that he heard groaning from the back and stood back up. He rushed to the back room, anxious to see where the sound had come from. Upon entering the kitchen, he saw legs stretched out behind a counter. Gulping, he stepped over, seeing his friend leaning against the wall, his hand pressed over a bloody wound in his stomach.

"Sam…" he breathed, running to his side and kneeling next to him. "Sam, I'm so sorry…"

"Tsume," the man coughed, blood trickling from his lips, "Yo' face…"

Tsume remembered his own wounds and frowned, "Forget that, you-"

"No…" Sam slowly choked out each word, "Dey told me… to tell ya," he coughed again, "Keith doesn' fo'git his promises."

Tsume looked down, growling, "Don't... Just stop talking." He began to stand, "I'm going to call an ambulance-" He stopped then, feeling a hand gripped onto his arm. Looking back, he saw Sam's face… smiling at him, "I ain't mad… Dis is nothing."

"Sam…"

"You still alive. You gotta… keep livin'. Okay? Jus… keep livin'…"

Tsume stood up, looking away as the light left from Sam's eyes. His life faded away from him, leaving nothing behind but a bloodied body with hollow eyes, still smiling as it lay there.

Suddenly, the sound of a car pulling up caused Tsume to jerk his head up, rage filling his face. With a determined grunt, he swung open the kitchen door and headed to the front. He took a moment to stop at Bastian's body, kneeling over and searching for a gun. He knew he kept one on him for protection dealing with the fighting bets.

Finding it in the body's right pocket, he pulled it out and stood back up. Checking that he was loaded, he cocked the weapon in his hand and walked over to the front door. He could hear them outside. It was now or never.

The front door of the bar swung open, the silver haired man stepping out. Blood trickled down from the wound on his face, soaking into his shoulder blade and dirtied white tank. His face was set in a furious scowl, glaring at the two men stepping out of a red car. It wasn't theirs.

"What? You didn't think we'd follow you? Your little girlfriend was nice enough to leave it for us." the first man smirked, "Stupid here forgot the keys to our jeep." He nodded to the man next to him who frowned, "Hey!" he replied, right before a gunshot rang out, sending him flying to the ground with a gaping hole in his head.

"What the fuck?!" the first man shouted, looking to the dead body next to him and then back at the silver haired man. He was shocked, his eyes wide as he bit his lip. The man in front of him stood calmly in front of him, cocking the gun in his hand once more. The look in his right eye was gone, nothing but menace left.

"Y-you…" the man spoke worriedly. Then he growled, "You can't just do that!" he shouted angrily, right before the man came at him, sending him crashing against the red car behind him. He gasped out in pain before noticing that his attacker now had him pinned, his gun pressed into his throat. He began to sweat, panicking.

"Can't what?!" the man screamed at him, "This?!" he yelled before firing the weapon, taking the man's life. His blood splattered onto the car behind him, the body slumping onto the concrete below to join the other one.

Tsume stood straight, sighing as he looked down at the two bodies, laying in their own blood. It had to be done. This was the only way to end it. They killed his friends. This is what they deserved… wasn't it?

It was then that a car drove past, causing him to recall his situation. He shook his head, groaning.

Shit…

Running back into the bar, he ignored the body of his friend on the ground. He went past the counter, pulling out a drawer and searching for something. When he found the first aid kit he grabbed it, deciding he didn't have time to go to the hospital, nor did he want to. He gritted his teeth and stood back up, running back out to the jeep.

He started the car as soon as he jumped in.

As he drove away from the mess he'd created, he realized that he didn't feel relieved like he should have been. He now had more lives to account for… And here he was again, running away. Nothing would ever change.

He would leave this city, see how far he could get once again… before Keith caught on. He wasn't going to stop until he was dead, his revenge fulfilled. All he could do was keep running.

When would it end?

It wasn't go to… unless… Images of mountains, fields of flowers and a running stream flashed into his mind. He shook his head.

Not now, he thought. Not now…

…

The sun was unbelievably hot, beating down upon the boy that walked along the highway, no view of his destination in sight. The land stretched on forever, visible steam rising off the cracked and dried dirt. The desert wind was still with no clouds in the sky, making the heat unbearable. He was wearing a tanned hat and a long sleeved white shirt to shield his skin from the sun.

The sound of his water jug sloshed about as he walked along with it tied to his waist. His backpack was heavy on his shoulders and he could feel the sweat dripping beneath his clothes. He groaned, sticking his tongue out to try and quell his exhaustion but to no use.

He couldn't even believe that this was the same land that was beating down rain that night. Now everything was dried up again. He couldn't stand this desert weather… unbelievable heat during the days and freezing nights… of course with a rare storm once in a while.

Sighing, he thought to himself. It had been what, five days now?

He had been beating himself up ever since he left that town. He wasn't just stupid and impatient for not waiting for the bus. Ten hours later, after he made it to the next town, he realized that he'd forgotten his checkbook and debit card back at the village. He was too far off to go back.

Luckily, he had some cash on hand. But it wasn't enough to get him as far as his old city, which was about a week away of non-stop driving. Two days later, he couldn't afford to stay in a motel any longer, let alone bus rides. He also didn't even have any forms of identification. So it wasn't even like he could even stop at the next town's bank and try to get his funds. He felt hopeless.

And he still had a long way to go… By then he had decided to walk the rest of the way, thankful that he had a sleeping bag on hand. Without motels, he could save as much money as he could for food… until he made it back to Tsume. He remembered that he had left another checkbook with him. Yes, that would work… as long as he was still there.

He sighed again. It was something that kept bothering him. He knew he was on the right path, but… what if he wasn't waiting anymore?

Moaning, he shook his head. No, he thought, I have to keep going… I have to try.

He stopped for a moment to take a break, bending over. Maybe he could try to hitch a ride? …And get killed by a crazy person. Yes, that was a great idea. He frowned. Even if a car did come along… It was so rare that one would even drive through. Not even the buses…Wait a second… His eyes widened.

Dropping his backpack on the ground, he unzipped the front pocket, pulling out a pamphlet of paper. Hurriedly unfolding the map, he could feel his pulse racing. Where was he?!

Scanning the map, he bit his lip. "No, no, no…" he spoke out loud.

Glancing up, he turned his head to look around, trying to find his bearings. He was at two cross streets… which happened to be dirt paths. No… when did he go off the highway?!

He grabbed his head, feeling tears in his eyes as began to panic. "TOBOE!" he shouted at himself, his voice echoing throughout the dried up land.

How could he have been so stupid, not paying attention?! How long had it been since he went off track?! …

Trying to calm down, he looked at the map again, tracing his finger along the drawn streets and structures. So it must have been about an hour ago… he must have just taken one wrong turn. That was it. He could go back, just trace his steps backwards. Yes, that would work!

… But… He looked down at his feet, then from side to side. No! Which way did he even come from?!

Before he began to panic once more, he remembered what he needed. His compass! He bent over, searching the front pocket of his backpack. It had to be here. No, maybe the other pocket? No… the other one then! He was frantically searching by now, his breathing heavy, his eyes wide. Growling, he took the backpack and turn it upside down, spilling everything out.

Glancing at the emptied contents he realized that it was not there.

Toboe whined, sitting on the ground and bringing his legs up against his chest, burying his head into his knees. How could he have been so forgetful in a time like this… he had been in such a hurry that he left what he really needed. …But at least he had the map… what good it did him…

He was going to die in this desert. Nothing left but bones and dirt… No more searching. No more paradise. No more Tsume.

Tsume…

Wait a second…

Lifting his head up, he wiped away the tears from his face full of determination. He wasn't going to give up that easily. He could do this!

Going into his true form, the red wolf began sniffing the ground. He padded around the cracked earth for what seemed like forever before he finally caught something. Lifting his head up once more, a boy now stood straight and ran to get his backpack. He pulled the bag over his shoulders again, nodding to himself.

But just as he was about to go back the direction he had come, he heard the cry of a hawk overhead. He stopped in his tracks, glancing upwards. The sun immediately blared into his eyes and he brought his right arm up to cover his face.

Toboe could see the bird now, soaring above him. It flew away a good distance before it turned around, coming back to him. Circling above him, the hawk cried out once more before it left him again, flying in the opposite direction.

What was this? Did he want him to follow him?

He couldn't just… He looked back in the direction of where he had caught the scent, back to the bus route. No… Looking down, he frowned. This was the right way, he was sure… but this bird was telling him otherwise.

The boy wanted to believe he was crazy, imagining this scene playing out in front of him… But he knew that wasn't true.

Gritting his teeth, he clutched onto his backpack and took off after the bird. You better not get me killed, he thought. He glanced up once more as he ran, trying to keep up with the hawk flying overhead. He couldn't care anymore… he didn't care. This was his new path…

He just knew…

…

It had been hours since the hawk led him away from the roads and now it seemed that he was in the middle of nowhere. The sun was still mercilessly beating down upon him as he walked along. The hawk had flown out of sight a while ago, now replaced with buzzards that loomed above him.

He was far past the regretting stage as he stumbled along, reach for the water jug that hung off his side. He paused in his tracks, frowning. There was barely anything left… He let go of it, letting the little water that was splash around inside the jug as it hit his thigh. He should save it as a last resort.

Just a couple of hours to go before the sun would finally set… Being that it was in the late afternoon, the day was at its hottest.

He sighed, wiping the sweat from his brow. Once again… he's made a horrible mistake. Or so it seemed…

If that was the case, why did he feel urged to keep going on the same path? He could have turned around long ago and gone back the way he came.

Turning his head back, he frowned. He felt so hopeless.

Shrugging, he turned back to the way he was going and continued on. Every now and then he would look up to the sky, watching those buzzards that were circling him. They were just waiting for him to die, weren't they?

"Screw you!" he shouted in the air, a part of him wishing it would drive them away. But they only ignored his unsuccessful cries.

Whining again, the boy bit his lip, looking down as he stepped over the cracks in the dirt. It was several minutes later that his stomach growled. He wanted to cry. He had some bread in his backpack, but knew that once he ate it, he would be even more thirsty than he already was.

He shook his head and continued on, trying to ignore the pain in his gut. He hadn't eaten since the night before when he stopped in the last town. He didn't plan on going off the main roads, let alone no roads at all. He hadn't seen any towns, not even cars since then.

Every now and then he was caught off guard, seeing images of places and people that he used to know. He'd heard of the desert before, the tricks it played out in the heat like this. Mirages.

At first he would spot lakes filled with water, towns, cars driving by… anything that his heart desired. But as he desperation grew… he began to see wolves, running along the desert scape. Kiba… Hige, Blue… They were enticing him to run with them, to join them on their search.

But it wasn't them. He'd even seen Miri and her pack, waiting for him, just standing there and beckoning him to join them again in that field of lunar flowers. He was so tired that his mind had resorted to empty promises and delusions.

This was pointless.

The boy stopped in his tracks, dropping his backpack at his feet. Frowning, he sat down, crossing his legs and leaning over on them. It wouldn't hurt to rest for a bit, at least until nightfall. Maybe then he could start again, the heat would be gone and he could move faster. But with little to no water…

He groaned, falling back onto the ground. He pulled his hat over his face, ignoring the sounds of the buzzards calling out overhead. Most likely they thought it would be any time now and they would have their feast.

The boy didn't even notice as he began to drift off to sleep, exhausted from walking without much nourishment…

"Toboe…" a woman's voice spoke gently, petting the little boy's soft auburn hair as he leaned onto the bed next to her, shaking with tears. "Toboe, please don't cry…"

He looked up, his face red with snot and tears soaking into his skin. It was when he looked at her smiling face that he bit his lip and cried again, "Mama, please don't leave me…" He threw his arms and face onto the soft bedding once more, clutching at the blankets around her.

The woman stroked a delicate hand over his once more, going to his chin and gently pulling him up to face her. "Sweetie, it makes me sad to see you like this." She was about to cry herself, but instead she remained strong for him. "You shouldn't be sad," she was having trouble getting the words out, occasionally coughing into her hand.

"But Mama, I don't wanna…" the little boy sniffled.

"I want you to be happy," His mother smiled, "Don't waste those beautiful tears."

The boy nodded, wiping his face and rubbing his eyes. "You need to be brave… for Gran. Okay?" the woman continued and the boy nodded once more, "Soon," the woman looked down, coughing into her hands once more, "We'll all be together again in paradise." She smiled at him again, wearily reaching out and placing her face on his cheek.

He could feel her skin growing cold and he bit his lip, placing his hands over hers, "Mama…" he began to cry again.

"Promise me, Toboe… we'll only cry tears of joy from now on…" she breathed, the light slowly fading from her eyes, "…promise me."

"Mama?" he waited, "…Mama?" he clutched onto her hands. "Mama?!" He kept calling her name, waiting for a reaction but nothing came. "No… Mama, don't go, Mama!" he bit his lip again, tears pouring down his face as he shook his mother's arm, her body not responding. "Mama, please, no!"

"…DON'T GO, MAMA!"

Toboe's eyes shot open and he sat up, his hat dropping from his face and onto the ground. He brought his hand up to his head and groaned, finding that he now had a headache. That was another wonderful thing this heat could bring on.

"Ouch!" he exclaimed, feeling something hit his side. Glancing to his right, he saw one of the buzzards next to him and waved at it, growling. "Get away!" he yelled. He then heard the sound of a wrapper crinkling and his eyes widened.

Looking in front of him, he saw the other two buzzards in front of his backpack, which was torn open. Between the two of them, they were wrestling each other for what remained of his bread. "No!" he cried, leaping forward to stop them. But it was too late.

One of the birds dodged him, flapping away as the other grabbed the rest of the bread and flew off. "You fuckers!" Toboe screamed, trying to grab at the one with his food. That was all he had left!

All three of the birds flew up into the sky, screeching wildly as if to taunt him. All he could do was bite his lip and groan as he watched them soar away from him, leaving him there to starve and die. He watched them until they were out of sight before hanging his head, a tear dropping down his face.

"Dammit…" he muttered, "…DAMMIT!" his cries echoed across the land, the sun finally beginning to set in the distance. Growling, he stomped over to his ripped up backpack, kicking it away from him. He fumed for a while before finally sitting down.

Reaching to his side, he found his water jug and began to undo the lid before noticing the water was all gone. His face fell, realizing that the lid had not been tight enough. It must have slowly been leaking the whole time…

"This figures." He sighed.

He felt like giving up, now more than ever. He'd come so far, only to sentence himself to a sure and slow death. It was only a matter of time before those buzzards would return for his carcass, perfectly roasted by the sun… How long could he last without water or food?

Sighing again, he stood up and walked over to his backpack. He found a shirt nearby and wrapped it around, tying it to close off the hole. The few things that had fallen out, he stuffed them into the backpack as well. Standing up, he slung it over his shoulder, proceeding to start walking again.

His throat was so dry, his stomach so empty… He was surprised that there were even tears in his eyes.

Suddenly, he noticed something from the corner of his eye. Glancing to the right, he saw a what appeared to be a wolf, walking his way. Shaking his head, he remembered the mirages from before. This was just another one, wasn't it?

But when he looked back again, the wolf was now a tall figure.

Toboe growled, angry with the tricks the desert was playing on him. He'd had enough.

"LEAVE ME ALONE!" he yelled into the distance, turning the other way. He clutched onto his backpack, pulling his hat down over his head. Wiping his tears away, he began to walk in the opposite direction of the blurred mirage.

"Toboe?!" a distant voice called to him.

The boy stopped in his tracks, his eyes widening.

Wait… he knew that voice… No…

Toboe slowly turned around, seeing the figure that was headed his way. He gulped, unsure of what he was seeing. He could feel his heart beating faster as he looked down again. He knew that this was only the desert torturing him. No, he thought… it's not him. There's no way…

"Toboe!" the voice called again, getting closer.

When the boy looked up again, he could see the figure clearer this time. He stood there, standing still and frozen as the man began to run to him.

This wasn't a delusion…

It was real.

He could see the man's eyes now, those golden pupils glowing as they raced toward him.

"Tsu…" he breathed, dropping his backpack, "TSUME!" he cried.

Toboe began running as fast as he could, regardless of his exhaustion. He let go of everything that mattered, tears falling from his eyes as his hat flew off his head. "TOBOE!" he heard his name being called again and he bit his lip. Was he dead? Was this paradise?

The boy fell into the arms of the man when they finally met up upon the cracked earth. The sun was setting behind them as the man clutched onto his shaking body. He stroked the boy's long auburn hair, running his fingers through it and gripping onto his back. "Toboe…" he whispered.

"Tsume…" Toboe sobbed, pulling back and gazing at the man's face. He didn't recognize him when he looked at him, his hair longer than he remembered, half of his face wrapped in bandages. The boy traced his lover's right brow, his fingers grazing down and past his lips. Was this really him?

But when he looked into those golden eyes, he remembered everything. "Tsume," he cried again as his lover's eyes began to water. The man took the boy's face in his hands, gazing into the boy's hazel eyes. Holding onto his cheeks, he watched as the boy placed his hands over his, smiling at him through his tears.

Toboe closed his eyes then, lifting his head up to softly press his lips against Tsume's.

When their lips parted, the man kissed the boy's forehead, then the side of his head, followed by his neck and shoulder. His lips touched everywhere he could take in that ever familiar scent of peaches.

The boy couldn't help but choke out small giggles at the man's gentle touches, gripping around him and pulling him closer. He nuzzled into his chest, remembering what it felt like to be held like this… It had been so long ago... He couldn't believe that this was real.

He'd finally found his paradise.

…

The fire embers glowed and twisted in the night, crackling sounds sparking from the wood that burned. The moon was half full, dully lit in the sky while the stars sparkled brightly. The desert air was cold, two figures huddled together underneath a blanket as they leaned up against the front tire of a black jeep. The fire cast shadows and light upon their faces as they watched the flames dance.

The boy nuzzled against the man's shoulder, breathing in his scent of sweet musk and sweat. He was holding onto his hand, occasionally tracing his fingers along the man's knuckles. His skin was just as rough as it was before, not soft like his. That was one of the many things he loved about him.

He frowned then, his thoughts running with curiosity. What path had led him here to him? Had he been searching for him all along? Or was this just fate? He wanted to ask him what had happened to his face, where he had been… what he had seen… But for now, he was just happy to be next to him… It didn't seem real.

"Tsume," he spoke gently, "Please tell me this isn't just another dream."

Tsume smiled and kissed his forehead. "This isn't just another dream." He repeated the words, rubbing the boy's shoulder. He couldn't believe he was in his arms again. A part of him wondered if he was asleep after all. There had been so many times before… it was just like this… and then he would wake up, feeling empty and alone.

He closed his eyes as he felt the boy tracing the lines of his fingers and knuckles. It felt so nice, the touch of his soft skin. As they lay in silence together he began to wonder why they were here. Was this the destiny that Toboe spoke of? Maybe it was real… this paradise.

The world was filled with so much grief, but this was worth every bit of it… even if it wasn't going to last forever.

"Toboe…" Tsume frowned.

The boy didn't say anything, which made him feel even guiltier. Another moment passed before the boy slowly pulled away from him. "The fire's dying," he spoke, tossing the blanket off. He stood up and stepped over to the fire, crouching next to it. He picked up a stick nearby and began poking at the embers, making the flames fly a little higher. "That's better," he commented.

"Toboe, I-"

"I'm still hungry." Toboe continued, "Do you have any more hotdogs we could throw on here?" He was ignoring Tsume on purpose. He didn't like the serious tone in his voice. It scared him.

"Toboe," Tsume spoke again.

"What?!" the boy finally answered, glaring at him.

"I can't stay here… I have to go." Came the reply.

Tears immediately began appearing in Toboe's eyes. He looked away from him, not stopping to stir the fire. Why would he say that? …They had spent over a year apart. They had finally found each other again. They were happy now… weren't they?

"Why not?" he asked, even though he didn't want to. He poked at the fire, trying to hide his discontent. But he couldn't help it, the whining in his tone and the sad look on his face gave him away.

"I can't be with you… I'm sorry…"

The boy bit his lip, sitting still. He wanted an explanation. "Why not?!" he repeated his words again, angrier this time.

Tsume looked down, frowning. "After tonight," he bit his lip, "I have to go... I'll drive you to the nearest town. Where were you going?"

How could act like he didn't even care? It didn't make sense… "I was looking for you!" Toboe spat at him, "Weren't you looking for me?!" He watched as the man looked up at him, his eyes wide. Tsume hung his head again, "Honestly… no. I wasn't."

Toboe could feel his heart sinking. How could he say that?

"I…" the man sighed, "It's too dangerous for you to be near me."

Toboe bit his lip, dropping the stick in the fire. He watched as the embers began to eat away at it. He couldn't understand how it had already come to this… Even though he felt sad, he could feel the heat in his cheeks rising. He was growing angry.

He stood up then, clenching his fists, "How can you… Why do you get to decide?" he bit his lip, "You don't understand… what it was like…I-I don't want to be alone anymore!" he huffed, tears trickling down his cheeks.

He frowned, turning his head away and wiping his face with his arm, "It's not fair, Tsume…" he sobbed.

"Please don't make this harder than it already is..."

"Well, I'm not leaving! …So just get used to it." He crossed his arms, looking away from him.

"Toboe…"

"What?!" he yelled angrily.

"You'll be dead because of me!" Tsume yelled back at him. The boy stopped crying and stood there, watching as the man rested his head in his hand. "…Do you remember those men I killed?"

"Yes…" he heard the boy mutter and continued, "Well, they found me… I've been on the run for over a year now, going from town to town and trying to stay alive…"

"Is that why you grew your hair out?" the boy asked, his tone softened now.

Tsume looked up at him, still frowning, "That's part of it, yes…" he growled, "You see this?" he pointed to his face. Toboe nodded, grimacing at the thought of how that could have happened, what lied underneath.

It was when Tsume looked up at him, that Toboe found himself softening. He nodded and the man continued, "I was lucky that this was all they got…" he bit his lip, "But you… I would never forgive myself... I couldn't keep on living if you… if…" he was looking away from him, his tone turning to sadness.

"Tsume…" Toboe breathed, kneeling next to him. He could feel that he was upset, his heart heavy. He almost regretted acting so angrily towards him. It wasn't that Tsume didn't want to be with him. It was that he couldn't… He loved him too much to be close to him again.

The boy frowned. Was it worth risking everything?

…He had nothing without him. And then he remembered those wise words, …If life has no purpose, you're already dead…

Toboe wrapped his arms around him then, resting his head against his. A moment later he felt the man's arms gripping onto him and he closed his eyes. He could feel Tsume weaken as he held onto him. He didn't know if he was crying. But he could feel that he was giving in; he was letting go.

The man breathed in the boy's scent, clutching onto the soft fabric of his shirt. He could feel the anger inside of him dying down, his worst fears slowly melting away… But he couldn't help but worry. He was risking too much… even now, just holding onto him. He didn't want to go down this path again…

"Toboe, what am I going to do?" he asked, not expecting the answer that came.

"We're going to find paradise."

Tsume frowned, still holding onto him. "Paradise? Toboe…"

"They won't find us there…" Toboe spoke softly, "So we'll keep running." He could feel Tsume's arms wrap tighter around him and he smiled. Stroking his silver hair, he pulled him closer, hugging onto him.

"We'll find it, Tsume… together."

* * *

><p>Kya! Love it? ;)<p> 


	24. Chapter 24

Soooo… I am so sorry it took me so long to get this next chapter up. I've had a lot of things going on… I won't get into it. I'm sure you'd rather just read. Hehe… BUT! Please know this is the longest chapter I've written so far! And I hope it was worth the wait. Please enjoy! 3

FYI: If you prefer the "uncut" version, please check out adult fanfiction dot net or deviant art.

Caution: Further chapters will contain mature content such as language and yaoi, Tsume/Toboe. Be forewarned.

Disclaimer: I do not own the characters or series of Wolf's Rain. They belong to BONES & Keiko Nobumoto. This story is non-profit for my own and others' enjoyment. Thank you. :)

**Nothing But Fear**

It was the next morning that he awoke to the smell of smoldered ashes, the feeling of silky strands of hair against his lips. The boy was still asleep next to him, his long auburn hair strung out around him. The man smiled, nuzzling against his head and breathing in his scent again. He'd grown so used to it already.

He listened to the boy's breathing, slow and steady, his body rising and falling. Smiling, he gently kissed his forehead before slowly sitting up. He pulled the blanket off of himself, standing up. He went to the back of the jeep, finding a jug of water. Walking over to the fire, he began to pour it over the ashes, making sure it was completely out.

The sound of water splashing caused the boy to stir, moaning a little in his sleep. The man smiled again, putting the lid on the jug and tightening it when he was done. After placing it back in the jeep, he proceeded to go around the makeshift campsite, gathering their belongings.

A few minutes passed before he heard the boy again, "Mmm, Tsume?"

Tsume stopped, turning around to look at the boy. He was sitting up, rubbing his eyes. "You're still here." He spoke, his brows making him look worried.

"What? …Of course I'm still here." He answered plainly, looking away and bending over to grab the cooler. He walked to the back of the jeep, placing it inside. When he turned around, he noticed the boy was going through his backpack and pulling out clothes. He began to undress and which caused Tsume to blush, darting his glance away.

"After you fell asleep, I wondered if you wouldn't try to sneak away in the morning." The boy smiled as he took off the white shirt, dirtied from the day before. "I need a shower," he grimaced, before noticing his companion who was looking away awkwardly. "What?" he asked, confused.

"Just hurry up, Toboe." Tsume angrily replied, still looking away.

Toboe looked down at himself, only in his underwear. "Oh," he blushed as well, "Ok…" He hadn't even realized… but it wasn't like Tsume hadn't seen him like this before… and much less at that. He frowned, switching his underwear out while he was at it, hurriedly putting fresh clothes on. "There." He muttered when he was done.

He held his backpack as he watched Tsume turn back around, glancing at him for a second before he continued loading the jeep. A minute passed by before the man motioned him over, "Here," he reached out, taking his bag from him. His hand swept over Toboe's for a second, causing the two of them to pause for a second, catching each other's gaze.

The boy smiled, closing his eyes as he leaned into him. He was expecting a morning greeting with warm lips, but when nothing happened he opened his eyes again. Looking up with a frown, he saw that the man had his head turned away from him. Furthermore, his face looked red and angry, which confused the boy even more. Why wouldn't he kiss him?

"Are you ready to go?" Tsume asked impatiently, walking over to the driver's side of the jeep.

After being ignored like that, Toboe frowned, feeling hurt and rejected. Why was he acting like this? They just kissed the night before. Why was now any different? He pouted his lips, his brow furrowed. "Yes," he replied half-heartedly, sticking his nose up. He walked over to the jeep's passenger side, noticing a problem. "There's no doors?" he asked.

"They're in the back. I'll get 'em put on later. Just wait it out, ok?" Tsume answered, starting the car. Toboe glared at him, hoping that he noticed. It didn't appear so. Sighing, he climbed in, situating himself and buckling the seatbelt in place.

"So, which way?" The man asked, glancing in his direction.

"West… Whatever. It doesn't matter." Toboe smugly answered, crossing his arms and looking away.

"Ok…" Tsume commented, his tone confused as he turned the wheel. He didn't understand why the kid was acting like this, whether it might have been something he said or did… or just the lack of sleep. Shrugging it off, he turned the car onto the desert dirt, heading west towards their destination.

…

The sun wasn't as hot that day, even though it was already in the afternoon. The black jeep shined brightly with the sun's gleam as it drove along the desert highway. There was complete silence between the two figures in the car, the boy looking out the open side of his door while the man watched him, frowning.

Everything had gone awkward and it made him a little upset. He didn't know why he was being given the silent treatment let alone the attitude. He watched as the boy sighed, a frown on his face as well as he held onto his seat. Wasn't it just yesterday that they were so grateful to find each other again? That was nothing short of a miracle…

It was odd, but he was beginning to believe what the boy had been telling him from the get-go. Maybe they were here to complete the journey… He didn't want to before, but now it seemed he didn't have a choice. He didn't have anything to lose… right?

The boy glanced over at him, probably feeling his golden eyes watching him. The man then quickly darted his gaze away, watching the road ahead. From the corner of his eye he saw the kid turn away once more, that frown still on his face.

They had passed by the first town a couple of hours ago. The kid wanted to stop, but he didn't. They couldn't take any chances. They had to keep moving… That could have been why he was mad. But then why had it been like this all morning?

He didn't want to say anything… but he didn't want it to be like this forever. It seemed like they were apart again… Last night he felt so relaxed lying next to him, like everything was normal again. But now… he couldn't stand the silence. Eventually the kid had to say something, right? …But he had to make the first move, didn't he?

"Ok, I give up." The man spoke.

"What?" the boy replied, a little startled as he turned to face him.

"Why are you mad at me?" The man wouldn't look at him, but kept his eyes forward on the road. His tone seemed a little angry, but it was mostly confused.

The boy frowned at this, clutching his fists and looking down again. He didn't want to talk about it. But mostly, he was surprised that he even asked. Not wanting to answer, he decided to do so anyways. He sighed, "…I'm not mad, Tsume."

"Yes you are, Toboe. It's obvious…"

Toboe darted his glance back to him, suddenly a little angry at the tone in Tsume's voice. It held a hint of humor, which caught him off guard. Was he mocking him?

"No…" the boy frowned.

"You know, you did this before," the man continued, "But…" he turned to face him, his tone now turning softened, "I can't make it better if I don't know what I did… So tell me."

When he smiled a little at him, it made the boy blush a little. He didn't expect that… But he also knew that Tsume's sincere demeanor to him wouldn't last… Toboe bit his lip, looking down again, "It's not like I can just say anything…" he muttered, "You'll just get more mad at me. You always do."

Tsume frowned, "That's not… Fine. Have it your way." He growled as he shot his head away again, a scowl on his face. The boy took notice, frowning as well.

See? He knew he wasn't going to change that easily… But… for some reason he didn't want to let it go now. That was something that wasn't going to change about him either. Tsume wanted to talk? Then they were going to talk. Toboe glanced at him again, his brows furrowed. He was going to get to the bottom of this and settle things. He didn't want to stay angry forever. This was not what he planned when he said they would search for paradise together.

Tsume wouldn't look at him and he bit his lip, "This morning… you were mean to me. That's why I'm mad."

The man did glance over at him then, "I don't know what you're talking about. Be more specific."

He still sounded angry, and this made Toboe angrier as well, "From the moment I woke up today, you've been acting like I'm a stranger! When I changed clothes-"

"Just tell me next time before you change." Tsume angrily interrupted him.

The boy stopped. Was that it? Seriously?

"It was just a little skin..." he spoke, the anger in his tone subsided.

"I know, but… It made me uneasy..."

A part of Toboe wanted to laugh, but he held back from doing so. That would only make it worse… He watched Tsume's face now change from anger to embarrassment, still not looking at him. He didn't have to act like this… Even though the man's embarrassment partially entertained him, he still wanted to understand. "You've seen me naked before…" he spoke, trying to reason with him.

Tsume just bit his lip, not saying anything.

Toboe frowned, continuing, "… and then, when I tried to kiss you…"

"You're right. I don't want to talk about it."

When Tsume's callous tone came right back, it caused Toboe's anger to come back as well. Not thinking, he growled, grabbing the closest thing to him. It happened to be his empty water jug, which he immediately threw at the man in frustration. Whirling right at Tsume's head, it bounced off him with a loud thud from the momentum.

Not expecting the sudden attack, he cried out and his hand on the wheel swerved to car to the left. Almost losing control of the vehicle, he growled, quickly pulling it over to the side of the road. Turning the keys off in the ignition, he angrily spun his head over to face the boy, " "What the hell is wrong with you?!"

"STOP IT!" came the boy's loud and angry cries. Tsume was taken aback, his eyes wide and his anger suddenly diminishing when he saw his face. Toboe had tears streaming down his face as he bit his lip. "Just stop it!" he continued, "I'm not doing this again! I can't…" he was crying now and brought an arm up to cover his face, embarrassed at his reactions, "I don't want to cry over you anymore… So please… just stop."

A moment later the boy's eyes widened when he felt strong arms wrap around him. He looked up as Tsume took him into a tight embrace. Toboe didn't resist, but he did frown, not wanting to give in like this. He pressed his face into the man's stomach, latching onto him.

"I'm sorry…" the man grimaced as he stroked the boy's long hair. "It's just that… I'm afraid."

Toboe looked up, curious, "Afraid?" he asked.

Tsume wouldn't look at him as he bit his lip, his tone thick in frustration, "Of what I might do… if I get too close to you. The last time... I won't do that to you again…"

Images of a familiar night flashed into the boy's mind, threatening golden eyes and strong hands that painfully clutched onto his arms. He felt the pit of his stomach swirling and his breathing stand still, "Oh…" he frowned. He didn't really want to remember that. It was different now. Tsume would never hurt him like that again… right?

"So… let's just go slow. Ok?"

Toboe nodded, pulling away from him and sitting up. "Ok…" he muttered. He listened as the car was started once more, turning them back onto the road. A few minutes passed by in silence. They were right back to where they started.

The boy couldn't help but feel uncomfortable now. He thought that by talking it out, things would get better… but now they were worse. He wanted to glance over at Tsume, wondering what his face looked like. But he didn't. He felt incredibly embarrassed.

Clasping his hands together in his lap, he looked over his right shoulder. He watched the land passing by as they drove along, the colors of yellow and gold blurring together in a haze. The sand and dirt kicked up from the wheel of the jeep and he frowned, feeling uneasy. "I don't like the door not being there." A reply from Tsume didn't come and he sighed.

Toboe could feel his eyes getting sleepy. They'd been on the road since early that morning. "I'm tired…" he muttered, yawning. Normally he would rest against the car door, but there was none. He just couldn't get comfortable. Tsume must have noticed this because he said something, "Lean against me."

The boy glanced over, watching the man's face, cool and collected. He frowned, looking away again, "No… that's ok…"

"Oh, stop it." Came the sudden reply, Tsume's arm pulling him next to him. The boy blushed at the sudden movement, his eyes widened slightly. He gave up. He always did… He could always be strong when he needed to, just as he had with Miri's pack. But when he was with Tsume… he felt weak… But it wasn't that felt like less of a wolf… he just felt hopeless when he was in his arms.

A few minutes passed by, Toboe still resting next to Tsume. He hadn't been able to go to sleep, not even for a moment. Glancing up, he saw the man's eyes still on the road, his face relaxed. Still feeling a bit awkward, he decided to strike up a new conversation. In doing this, he hoped it would relieve his mind of troubled thoughts, "You never did tell me how you found me." He spoke.

He could feel Tsume shift a little before he replied, "I was driving this way. After I pulled over and set up camp for the night, I actually caught your scent in the air. It was unmistakable." He smiled, "I followed it out of curiosity, thinking I was crazy… But then I heard you yelling."

Toboe blushed, nuzzling against him. He wanted to know everything, not just that. But he was afraid to ask. He especially wondered about the bandages on the man's face, what had happened to him… Looking up, he realized the man's facial expression had changed. He didn't appear carefree any longer, but saddened.

This made the boy frown, trying to imagine what was going through his head. He ran his eyes over him, examining the cuts and bruises, his deep frown and messy silver hair. Sighing, he slowly placed his hand on the man's leg, brushing it with his fingertips. He wanted to comfort him, to let him know that he was there.

"I like your hair… by the way." He softly spoke, smiling.

Tsume just shortly glanced at him and managed to flash a small smile, "Thanks." He answered.

Tsume could feel the boy's hand on his leg. It made him uncomfortable. Yes, he wanted to be close to him, but just as they were now… he couldn't help but still feel guilt. It was like the memories of those days were starting to come back to him and it only made him regret more.

"It's nice longer like this…" the boy spoke again, sitting up. He didn't remove his hand, looking down, "I think it softens you."

Tsume frowned, "Well, you look like a girl."

The man's eyes widened and his face dropped, realizing the insult he'd just thrown at the kid. Slowly turning to look at him, he expected nothing but tears. Instead, the kid's face was in a dark scowl, his eyes blazing in anger at him.

"I could kill you, Tsume." He growled.

Tsume couldn't help but laugh, unsure if he was half joking or not. Either way, the look on his face was hilarious. A moment passed before he heard the boy's laughs chime in as well. He laughed harder, placing a hand over his mouth. "I'm sorry!" he breathed, "I'm really sorry!"

The boy just smiled back at him, still laughing. Regardless of how things had changed and where this road was taking them… some things would never change. This was something that he had realized about Tsume. He wasn't perfect. But for now, he was happy to be here with him on this lonely road.

The man wrapped his arm around him once more as their laughter began to cease. Pulling him closer, he kissed the top of his head. "I forgive you," the boy muttered. The man smiled. ...Maybe he could be happy… now that they were together again. They could start anew, do everything over… and this time he would get it right.

The rest of the day continued in silence, each of them relaxed in each other's arms as they drove west. Toboe eventually drifted off to sleep with a smile and a sigh, feeling safe and content in the man's arms. Tsume held him close, also smiling as the sun began to set that day. The next town should be coming up soon. They would get a place to stay for a while… take a break before they figured out what to do next.

After all, he was still on the run…

…

Two weeks had gone by since that day. He could still remember gathering sticks and brush to start the campfire when a wind blew past him. The smell of peaches filled his nostrils, sending his mind wild with curiosity. It couldn't be…

But even when he ignored the impulse to follow the scent, the boy's voice echoed in the distance. In that moment he knew it wasn't just a mistake. And sure enough, there he was underneath the desert sun, still hot as it began to set.

After over a year apart from each other, it didn't even seem real.

And on top of that, here they were again… repeating their search for paradise. He couldn't believe how quickly he'd given into the boy's demands. He wanted to keep Toboe safe… he wanted to leave. Didn't he?

He couldn't help it though… even when the kid told him he wouldn't leave him again, he had to admit that a part of him was happy because of that. Yes, he didn't want any harm to come to him because of the mess he'd gotten mixed up in. But… he didn't want to be apart from him either.

It had been too long… He couldn't do that again.

And there still hadn't been any signs of Keith or his men for almost three weeks. Maybe he was in the clear, if even for a little while?

He should be grateful that Toboe wanted to remain by his side, regardless of what it might bring. Did he really care for him that much?

He shouldn't have been stressed like this. He knew that by now his nerves were rubbing off on the kid. Every time he tried to get close to him, he ended up shutting him out. It wasn't even like they were lovers anymore, but close friends. There were several times by now that he tried to just hold his hand… but every time he pushed him away. He could tell that Toboe was frustrated by this, wanting to be near him…

But he couldn't touch him.

Furthermore… he wanted to… But he just couldn't bring himself to do that. It made him feel weak, selfish… and even perverted at times. He wondered if the kid knew this… was he doing it on purpose? To tease him?

"Stop it, Toboe." The man muttered, brushing the boy's hand away from him.

"What?" Toboe smiled, ignoring his friend's request. He reached his hand up again, petting the back of the man's head. He could feel the tension rising between them and he knew it was wrong of him to persist on touching him, "Tsume, I do like it, not bristly like before."

Toboe laughed when Tsume glanced at him, his brows furrowed and his cheeks red. As he began to play with the ponytail that remained as it was before, the man batted at him once again. "Don't touch me!" he glared.

The boy frowned, withdrawing his hand and pausing for a moment. Then, without a second thought, he smiled and reached up again, roughly stroking the man's hair and ponytail. "But, Tsume, I can't help it! It's so soft!"

"Fine! See if you like it!" Tsume growled, grabbing the boy's hair that was in a long braid. "Ahh!" Toboe cried out in pain, "Let go! It hurts!" he yelled again, tugging on the man's arm.

Tsume just smiled menacingly, now that he had the upper hand. The boy kept pulling at him, but it was no use. "How does it feel?" the man growled, laughing a little. Toboe whined, struggling to get free. He began wildly flailing his arms as he was wrestled to the ground, yelling at him the whole time to stop it.

"Why you!" Tsume growled when the boy managed to hit him. He let go of his hair and began grabbing at him instead, hitting ticklish areas. The boy's cries eventually turned into laughter as he still tried to escape. Tsume grabbed Toboe's arms when he tried to hit him again, now lying on top of him. He laughed again, having pinned him completely.

"You idiot," he smirked, looking down at the boy's face full of tears and laughter.

Tsume watched as Toboe wiped his eyes with his sleeve, still laughing a little. His long auburn hair had come undone and it was now in a tangled mess all around him. He noticed his hazel eyes as well and smiled softly. His skin was as soft as he remembered, the feeling of him lying underneath him flashing images through his mind.

The boy finally caught his wandering gaze and looked up, losing his laughter. He could see a far away look in the man's right eye, his lips parted as if he were imagining something. He suddenly felt embarrassed… he knew that look. He blushed, "Tsume…" he breathed.

Tsume snapped back to reality at the mention of his name, letting go of the boy's wrists. Biting his lip, he frowned and immediately climbed off the top of him. He moved a few feet away from him, his back turned to him.

Toboe frowned as well, rolling over. His cheeks were still red when he sat up, watching Tsume searching through a grocery sack. The boy brought his knees up to rest his chin on, wrapping one arm around his legs. Running his hand through the blades of grass at his side, he frowned.

The way things were, it was like they were back at square one… Tsume was acting cold just as before they really knew each other. He would hardly touch him, let alone talk to him much. It seemed like their only conversations were about what they were going to eat or where they were going next.

They were on the search for paradise once again… but he thought this time would be different. …Even their relationship was different from the last time… Had that changed?

Toboe glanced over at Tsume, his face stern and concentrated as he bit into an apple. He watched as the juice slid down the man's chin and neck, glistening in the light of the sun over his muscles. Tsume wiped his mouth of the juices, licking his fingertips before he took another bite. Quickly turning his head away, Toboe blushed.

He felt dirty for thinking like that… He thought he could be stronger than this, but he wasn't. He felt like nothing more than a pervert, wanting Tsume like this. Was he wrong to feel that way?

After all, they'd been through so much together and had spent so much time apart… He thought that now they were back together again, they could start over, pick up where they left off… But Tsume didn't want that, did he?

Toboe frowned, burying his face into his knees.

He was being treated like a child… just as before.

But he had changed! He was older now; he had grown not only in body but in mind. Couldn't Tsume see that? …When he was with Miri and the others, he was treated like a man. He was a pack member, a wolf. He wanted to feel strong again. He wanted to feel needed. They were doing this together, weren't they?

Toboe looked up, seeing that Tsume had finished eating. He knew that it wasn't that Tsume no longer had feelings for him. He was acting this way because of what had happened before. He was afraid of what might happen. But… that was in the past. Things were different now…

He couldn't keep this up forever. Eventually Tsume had to let him back in… He thought that after a few days of leaving him alone that the older wolf would let down his guard. But it only seemed like it was getting worse…

He bit his lip, deciding what he was going to do next. Whether he had to force this man to be with him or trick him into it, he was going to make him pay some bit of attention to him. With that, he stood up and walked behind Tsume, bending over and wrapping his arms around him.

The man immediately tensed up, raising his hand to pry him away, "Toboe, I don't want-"

"I don't care what you want." The boy smiled. He hugged him tighter, resting his head on the top of his. "This is what I want." He could feel Tsume's shoulders and arms lowering, giving in to his embrace. The two figures stayed like that for a while, soaking in the feeling of each other's touch.

After a few minutes the man couldn't help it, reaching his left arm up to pull the boy's head in closer. Tilting his chin up, he brought his lips to meet his, taking in a soft kiss. A moment or two passed before he pulled away, smiling at the boy who was now blushing and smiling as well.

"There, how's that?" Tsume asked.

Toboe glanced away from his golden eyes, embarrassed yet pleased. He didn't answer though, but after a second or two he went in for another hug. Dropping down to his knees, he nuzzled against the man's back. He was still holding onto him when he felt a hand patting his arms. "Ok, now…" came Tsume's voice.

The boy let go, knowing that was all he was going to get for now. He still wanted more, but if this was all he could give him… then he was satisfied.

"Tsume…" he spoke after a minute or two, now sitting beside him.

Tsume glanced down, a questioned look in his expression. The boy continued, "I know it will probably make you mad, but… I want to know. What happened… underneath those bandages?" He watched as the man frowned, turning away from him. "I'm sorry," he immediately spoke again, "It's just…"

The boy didn't continue from there, he could tell the man's mood had switched. What was wrong with him? His curiosity always drove him away… He asked too many questions, he knew this. So why did he keep doing it?

"We should get going," Tsume spoke, standing up. Standing over the boy, he reached a hand out to him, "C'mon, then." Toboe looked up, surprised at the kind gesture. He reluctantly took the man's hand and was pulled to his feet. He brushed the grass and dirt off his pants, frowning. Normally Tsume would be angry for poking him with personal questions… but he wasn't acting angry.

Did he hurt his feelings?

"Tsume…" he breathed, turning around. He watched as the man walked over to the black jeep, having picked up the cooler. He was now loading it in the back, along with a bag filled with food they'd not eaten. "Lunch's over," he answered, "We gotta get to the next town and get a place to stay for a while… How's that sound?"

Toboe couldn't help but smiled, "A while?" he repeated, running over to the passenger door.

Tsume nodded, "Yes, I'm tired of the road. Aren't you?" He walked over to the driver's side, opening the door and climbing in. The boy followed his suit, thankful for the answer and also for the door that was now attached to the vehicle. It relaxed him.

The boy hurriedly got into his seat, buckling himself in. He listened as the man laughed a little bit before pulling a box of cigarettes out of his pocket. He lit one up before starting the car, taking in a deep breath before blowing out the smoke. "We deserve a good rest, I think." He sighed.

Toboe frowned as he watched him inhale on his cigarette again. He didn't like this new habit… not since the day after he'd found him. He wanted to say something for a while… But right now, it wasn't a good time. He liked this cheerful Tsume and didn't want to ruin it.

"Tsume," the boy spoke up as they got on the road once more.

"Hnn?"

"Can we stay in the next town for more than one day?"

Tsume glanced at him curiously and he continued, looking down, "It's just that… I know we're supposed to find paradise, but I need a break. I…" he met his eyes, "I don't want to think about it for a while. A rest would be good, like you said."

The man smiled, nodding, "No worries, runt."

Toboe paused for a minute before smiling, "Runt… I haven't heard that in a while."

"Oh," Tsume frowned, "I didn't-"

"No!" the boy stopped him, "…I missed it."

Toboe moved closer to his friend, slowly placing his hand on his leg. He was surprised when after a minute or two, he felt the man's hand over his, entwining his fingers with his own. Looking up, he saw that a small blush had crept upon Tsume's face that was frowning.

But he knew that he wasn't angry, just embarrassed. He smiled, squeezing his hand and resting his head on his shoulder. They were starting over, creating a new beginning for the both of them. In time, things would be as they were… but only better.

…

The man sighed, turning the key in the lock as soon as he walked up to the door. He knew that the kid was waiting inside for him to return from his trip to the local grocer's. It had been over a week now since they'd found a place to stay. It was nice to forget… But it wouldn't be long before they would need to pick up where they left off.

They were taking their time, resting from the long drives, day after day, town after town. They were staying in a small town not too far off from the highway. The motel was decent, small like the town without much traffic passing through. It was older, but clean and it even had a little kitchenette.

This was much to Toboe's delight, who insisted on cooking for him since the day they rented the place. While he had managed to pick up a few tricks during their time apart, he still enjoyed it. As soon as he brought this bag inside, he knew the kid would run right over to him.

He no doubt would smile at all the ingredients he'd managed to find, say a few things here and there. Then he'd take the bag, unpack everything and begin cooking while he himself found a place to sit and watch him… probably at the chair and table by the window.

Eventually Toboe would join him, sitting across from him in the other chair after he brought him dinner. After their meal, they would most likely watch a little bit of television. The boy would fall asleep, then he would slip outside for a cigarette break before going to sleep himself.

That was how every night had been for the past week. He was comfortable with the routine… but something was beginning to bother him.

Ever since that kiss he gave him during their lunch that day… Toboe hadn't tried anything. Why was that?

It really shouldn't have mattered. He should have been relieved… But he was starting to wonder. Was he mad at him? He certainly didn't seem like it… they hadn't gotten into much of their usual fights, aside from occasional bantering here and there… And Toboe hadn't questioned him like normally since…

Was that it? …So why?

He was so used to the kid's prying, always wanting more answers… and he just stopped.

Something was off… Had Toboe just simply given up?

Maybe he thought it was pointless… he'd been so closed off to him for a while now. The only time he showed any sort of affection was when the boy practically forced him into it, whether it be a short kiss or just holding his hand… And this was just when they were at their motel, not in public.

He was further starting to wonder… was it more than just that one incident that was holding him back?

No… he still loved him, he knew that. And it was obvious that Toboe still had feelings for him…

So why was he still not letting him in?

He quietly opened the door to their motel room, expecting to see him there on his bed surfing through the channels on the television. But he wasn't. As he closed the door behind him, he heard the tub running in the bathroom.

He sat the bag on the kitchenette counter, pushing it away from the edge. Pausing for a moment, he reached into his pocket to pull out a pack of cigarettes. He began tapping it into the palm of his other hand, thinking he would have a free moment before the kid got out.

But right before he lit one up, he heard the bathroom door open. Looking up, he saw Toboe stepping out in a towel that he held to him. "Tsume, you're back." He smiled, "I was just about to take a bath, but-"

"Go ahead." Tsume nodded.

The boy frowned, noticing the cigarette pressed between his lips with his lighter ready. "You can't smoke in here, remember?"

The man groaned, "I know, I know."

"Well, I don't want to pay a fine! Go outside with it!" Toboe snapped before going back into the bathroom and closing the door behind him.

Tsume laughed a little, half surprised at the way he'd just been scolded. Shrugging, he did as he was told and opened the front door again. Closing it, he leaned against the cold cement wall of the motel, noticing that the night had fallen. He could already see the stars now as he flicked his lighter on.

He thought that Toboe hadn't changed that much since they were together before… But that wasn't true at all. He'd grown, not just his hair, height, voice or age… but emotionally. Yes, he would still get into those whiny moods of his and nag at him, or get all teary eyed when he wanted to be near him… but there was more to it.

Blowing out a puff of smoke he realized something… Why was it that he'd changed like this? …Come to think of it, he never even asked him what he'd been through, let alone thought about it. Was that why the kid was acting odd?

Maybe he should ask about it… put an end to this so they could move on. And honestly, he was curious now…

Finishing his break, he went back inside after stomping out his cigarette. He slipped off his boots, kicking them next to the boy's by the door. After that, he dressed down to just his jeans, deciding he was going to shower after the kid was done.

Going over to lay on the bed, he picked up the remote and turned the television on, immediately clicking from channel to channel. It wasn't long before the bathroom door opened again but he ignored the interruption. Toboe walked out, now dressed in pajama bottoms and one of the man's t-shirts that hung like a curtain on him. His hair was wet as he rubbed it with one of the motel towels.

He walked over to the bed where Tsume was lying on, still flipping through channels as he ignored him. He climbed in next to him, sitting by his side with his back against the wall. "What are you watching?" he asked, glancing at the television.

"Nothing," the man answered, clicking it off. "I'm going to bed soon anyways." He turned to the boy who was still drying his hair with the towel. "I think we should leave tomorrow… get going again." He watched as Toboe turned his head from side to side, running his fingers through his long wet hair. "Sure, I guess so." He plainly replied, not looking at him.

Tsume frowned. The kid was doing it again… acting like he didn't have a care in the world. He wanted to ask him why… but he didn't know if he'd be opening a can of worms by doing so. But still…

"Toboe," the man sighed.

"What?" he asked, turning to look at him with those doe like eyes of his.

Tsume glanced away, rubbing the back of his head. He couldn't go through with it, "Aren't you gonna make dinner? …It's getting late." He looked over to the counter where the bag of groceries still sat.

"No, I already ate while you were gone."

The man looked back to him, a scowl on his face, "…I went out to get everything… for you… like you asked…"

Toboe just smiled at him through his teeth, "Sorry… I couldn't wait. I was too hungry." He laughed a little, making Tsume even angrier. The boy noticed this and patted the man's leg, "But you can make something! …I just don't want to." He smirked.

Tsume didn't say anything as he got up and went into the kitchen. He pulled out the groceries from the bag with a groan, heating up the cooktop and pulling out a pan from the cabinet. As the pan heated, he began chopping celery and onions, as well as boiling water that was already ready to go. It wasn't long before Toboe walked up behind him just as he added dried noodles to the water.

"What are you making?" he asked curiously.

"Chow mein." He answered, adding the vegetables to the heated pan now soaked in oil.

Tsume went through the steps, drying the boiled noodles and adding them to the stir fry before pouring sauce over everything. It wasn't long before it was done and ready to eat. He turned off the burner and grabbed a couple of plates, rolling his eyes at his audience.

Toboe certainly looked hungry now.

He filled the plates with the noodles and brought them over to the table and two chairs by the window. The boy joined him as he sat down, beginning to take bites of his hot food. He continued chewing as he watched Toboe begin to dig in, moaning in delight, "Tsume, this is great!"

The man smiled, feeling accomplished. It made him happy. But then… he decided to bring out what was preying on his mind. He swallowed a bite before talking, "So why are you acting weird?" he asked.

"Wawt?" Toboe spoke, his mouth full of noodles, "Ah'm nawt octeen weewrd."

"Yes you are! And don't talk with your face stuffed! How old are you?!" Tsume spat back.

"Eighteen!" the boy replied angrily after swallowing.

The man paused, blinking as he lost the frustration in his voice, "What? When did that happen?"

Toboe looked away from him with a frown, "…People get older, you know." He bit his lip, "Not that you noticed."

Tsume frowned. Was this the reason he was acting so coldly towards him? He looked across the table at the boy whose face was turned away from him, his plate still full. He decided to press further into the matter, "When was your birthday?"

The boy looked at him, his face softening. Biting his lip, he paused and looked down, "Last week…" he muttered.

"Last week?" the man repeated, "Why didn't you say anything?"

"You didn't ask."

"Was I supposed to?"

Toboe looked up again, his lips pressed, "No…"

"Is that why you're mad at me?"

"What?" the boy breathed, "I'm not mad at you!" he groaned and stood up, pushing his chair away from him. He stepped over to the bed nearest to him, throwing himself on in with a thud. A few seconds passed before he let out a big sigh, the man watching him.

"I'm just… frustrated." He spoke into the bedspread.

"Why's that?"

Toboe moved his head slightly, seeing Tsume now standing next to the bed. "You're annoying." He told him.

"I'm annoying?" Tsume smirked.

The boy groaned again, burying his face back into the bed and clutching the blankets with his fists. A few minutes went by and he could still feel his friend standing over him, just watching. He wondered what he would do next, "I'm going to sleep now." The boy exclaimed.

"That's my bed. Yours is right there." The man pointed to the other bed, frowning.

"I don't care!" he yelled back before pausing, his tone softening, "…This is what I want."

"It's always what you want."

"No it's not!" Toboe looked at him, his face full of fury, "Nothing has changed! You're still the same!" he growled, sitting up. "You don't tell me anything… You don't touch me… You're still pushing me away…"

"Is that why you're upset?"

"You're so smart, Tsume." The boy replied sarcastically.

"Hey!" the man grabbed his chin, pulling his face up to look at him. He was now sitting on the bed next to him. Toboe's face was in a scowl, but he continued anyways, "I'm trying." He spoke roughly.

"Like hell you're-"

The boy's angry outburst was stopped by lips that were pressed against his own. His eyes widened before they softened, taking it in. When the man parted from him, he growled, "You think it's that easy? That you-" his lips were taken again, this time a bit harder. He closed his eyes, feeling his insides trembling, his cheeks turning red as he wrapped his arms around the man's neck. He felt hopeless, as he was giving in yet again.

He moaned when he felt hands pressed against his back, pulling him closer to the warm body next to him. Images of that day in the rain, their first kiss against that brick wall, the scent of sweat and musk… it all began to flash through his mind… Their first night together, the touch of him pressed against him… It was all coming back to him.

"Tsume…" he breathed, his hands beginning to wander.

But it was when his fingers began to trace further up the man's thigh that everything stopped all together. The kiss was broken and the boy was pushed away, the man sitting back on the bed.

"Tsume…" Toboe spoke again, frowning as he watched his lover move away from him. He was sitting on the side of the bed, his arm resting on one knee while the other was pressed against his head. "I'm sorry…" he muttered, his voice stricken with regret.

"But, Tsume…" the boy breathed, crawling next to him. He placed a hand on the man's shoulder, worried about the sudden change of events. "It's not…" he bit his lip, "We don't have to do anything… just don't walk away from me… please, Tsume." He waited for a reply, but nothing came so he continued, "I won't touch you… Just lay here with me, that's all I want…"

"It's not that, Toboe…"

"Then why, Tsume…" he could feel tears in his eyes. His heart was breaking all over again, "I just thought… why can't you…I…"

Tsume stood to his feet, the boy frowning as he watched him do so, "Because," he spoke angrily, "I just can't…"

With that, the man left him sitting alone on the bed, walking away and into the bathroom, closing the door behind him. The boy sat there for a while, his expression sad and worried as he listened to the shower faucet being turned on. He frowned, looking down at his legs.

Was it really that hard for Tsume?

It had been a long time since he left him… that day he walked out the door, his body still carrying cuts and bruises that were inflicted upon him by someone he loved. Yet… He'd already forgiven him long ago but… maybe Tsume hadn't forgiven himself yet. …Was that it?

He looked up, glancing at the bathroom door. How long would it be before Tsume would come to him, his heart free of worry and grief… Was this just him? A man that hated the very thought of himself?

But even so… he still loved him. Tsume had promised to wait for him, and now here he was… waiting for Tsume.

Toboe sighed and laid back down on the bed, pulling the blankets back and over him. He buried his face into Tsume's pillows, his mind beginning to imagine it was him as he began to get sleepy. This wasn't the way he envisioned being with him again as he walked across the desert weeks past. But… maybe all that he needed was patience.

He would wait as long as it took before this man realized that what was in the past, was the past. Eventually he would have to let it go… But it seemed like no matter how hard he tried to show him that he loved him, that he didn't care anymore… the further away he would run.

Was seemed like minutes later, was actually much longer when Toboe heard the bathroom door creak open. He closed his eyes, his back already turned away as he frowned. He listened as Tsume's footsteps moved around the room, locking the front door, cleaning up the kitchen and turning off the lights. He then heard the blankets ruffle on the other bed that was designated as his.

But just then, he felt the blankets around him being pulled back. His body froze, his eyes widening as he felt Tsume crawling in next to him and pulling the blankets back over them. He still didn't move as the man wrapped his arms around him, pulling him into his embrace from behind.

Toboe felt his eyes brimming with tears and he smiled. He could feel Tsume's warm breath on the back of his neck as he laid next to him, burying his face in his long hair. The boy wanted to cry. He wanted to turn around… to kiss him… touch him… say something…. But he knew he couldn't do that.

He slowly began to drift off to sleep with the sound of Tsume's heartbeat against his back. Smiling again, he closed his eyes. His lover was finally starting to give in and let go of everything the past held against them.

And this… was all that he wanted.

…

The boy slowly blinked his eyes open, drearily beginning to awaken. He listened to the sounds of someone moving around the room as he rubbed his cheek into his pillow. There wasn't much light shining into the room through the cracks past the curtains. Closing his eyes again, he rested them for another or minute or two before deciding to wake up. He couldn't go back to sleep now.

"Tsume?" he spoke softly as he slowly propped himself on one arm, finding where his friend was. The man was standing near the television, pulling a t-shirt over his head. The boy saw that he wasn't wearing the bandages on his face, but he could barely make out what he saw without much light.

Tsume sat down on the foot of the bed and began slipping on his boots. "We should get going." He spoke as he tied the laces.

"Already?" the boy replied, sitting up and yawning, "What time is it?"

"Around seven."

"It's too early!" came a surprised reply.

"We've got a lot of things to do today." Tsume stood up and walked into the bathroom.

"Just driving..." the boy spoke after him.

"No." the man's answer was calm and short.

The boy didn't say anything as he looked at the open doorway to the bathroom. The man stepped out after a minute or two, the bandages now wrapped on the left side of his face again, "I thought we'd do something different today." He smiled.

"What do you mean?"

"Well, Toboe, I missed your birthday, didn't I?"

Toboe began to get excited, his pulse racing, "Really?" he gleamed for a moment before pausing, looking down with a frown, "...But… can we do that? Do we have enough time?" he asked.

Tsume walked over to the dresser, pulling out a few clothing items from the drawer and tossing them at him. The boy caught them and looked back up as his friend continued, "Yeah… it should be ok." He leaned on the dresser, crossing his arms, "Besides… I'm not done with our break yet, are you?"

"No!" Toboe answered with a smiled. He threw back the sheets and leapt out of bed in a hurried rush. He didn't expect this as he began to get ready, rushing into the bathroom. Turning on the sink, he heard Tsume call after him, "I'm gonna go see what's to do here. You finish up and I'll be back in a sec, k?"

"Ok!" the boy answered, his mouth full of toothpaste as he scrubbed his teeth. The sound of the motel door closed and he continued getting ready. He soon finished washing up after a few minutes before he headed back into the main room. Walking over to his bed he began to gather the blankets, neatly making it back up.

It wasn't long before Tsume got back, "Are you ready?" he frowned, seeing the boy still in his pajama pants and t-shirt.

Toboe nodded, "Yes!" he then began to undress, changing his clothes as the man turned around. He blushed, "I booked us one more night, then we're on our way in the morning." He spoke a bit awkwardly, avoiding the sight of his naked friend.

"Why not today?" the boy asked, stepping into a pair of jeans.

"Well, the guy at the desk told me there's nothing to do here… but there's a city thirty miles or so north of here."

"I'm done."

Tsume turned back around, "It's off our route… but I figured we could get breakfast, do some shopping, maybe lunch and then come back for the night?" He glanced at the boy who was just all smiles. He continued, smiling as well, "…We'll just take it easy before heading out tomorrow. How's that sound?"

Toboe didn't answer but stepped over to him then, wrapping his arms around him. He hugged the man tightly, thanking him with actions instead of word. It was like that day they had lunch on the side of the road in the grass, the man just standing there in embarrassment as the boy held onto him. A minute passed before Tsume sighed, patting Toboe's head, "Ok, runt. Time's wastin'."

The boy just looked up, not letting go of him as he nodded, "Mmm," he muttered with a smile, small tears brimming in his eyes. His heart was beginning to feel full again.

…

The little restaurant was very busy, people eating while others waited for a table, some just stopping by to pick up something from their bakery. It was small, but homey, the walls painted a soft violet and trimmed in a crisp white. The floors were a bright coral red, shining brightly from a fresh wax job, no doubt.

The sound of plates and silverware clinked together as the mumbles and laughter of people filled the air. The afternoon sun gleamed through the windows, lighting up the faces of each one of them. Most sat at tables together, taking bites of food in between carrying on their conversations with each other.

A man dressed in white called to his fellow workers as he placed several orders, whether they were in person or on the phone. His assistants were packing with fresh pastries and other baked goods, getting them ready to be sent off. A few people stood in line at the bakery counter, impatiently waiting to fill their own orders as waiters and waitresses rushed trays of food to their designated tables.

The silver haired man took a gulp of his water, washing down his last bite. He leaned back in his chair, sighing with much content. He watched as his younger friend across the table continued to work on his plate. Glancing around at the other customers, he commented, "This must be a popular place… it's only four and it's slammed."

The man turned back to him when the boy didn't answer. Toboe was obviously enjoying all of the pampering he was doing for him. He was still munching on a croissant in one hand, the other hand wrapped around a fork that scuffled through his salad bowl. He made little noises of delight, moaning at the delicious taste of his meal.

He had to admit… it made him happy to see the kid happy. He smiled, "Fun day?"

The boy looked up from his food, grinning and nodding his head before he dove back in.

"You worked up an appetite, huh?"

"Huh?" the boy repeated, pausing for a moment.

The man nodded towards the bags at the side of their table. He'd spent the majority of the day just buying stuff for the kid. It was mostly clothes among other necessities. What Toboe had been wearing for the past few weeks, was the same old stuff he'd seen on him over a year ago. He was long overdue for something new.

"We took longer than I thought we would." The man sighed, leaning back in his chair.

The boy looked down, smiling, "Thank you, Tsume… for today, for everything." He looked up again as he spoke softly. His face was sincere and tender, causing the man to glance away from him with a frown, "Just finish up already," he muttered.

The boy laughed a little, his plate already empty, "I'm done... Hey! …How about some gelato?"

"Gelato?"

"It's ice cream!"

"I know what it is, Toboe." Tsume replied, "I'm just surprised you're still hungry."

"I saw it on the menu before we ordered. I decided then that was what I wanted…"

The man leaned forward, resting an arm on the table. "Is that so?"

"Well, I have to finish with something sweet. There's no way around it." Toboe simply replied, sipping his tea.

"You're getting spoiled." The man smirked before looking around to see if he could grab someone to place an order. There didn't appear to be anyone that was free at the moment. Sighing, he pushed his seat back and stood up, "I'll order at the counter. It will take forever and we need to go."

Toboe watched as his friend departed his side, smiling after him. He waited patiently, tracing his fingers along the tabletop. He couldn't believe how wonderful the day had been… it was even Tsume's idea. He did feel spoiled to be honest, but he was soaking in every minute of it. He didn't want the fun to end.

Then he realized something; he forgot to tell him which flavor he wanted. But before he could go after him, he saw the man already returning to their table, two dishes of gelato in hand.

Tsume sat down again, passing the boy's dessert to him before scooping a small bite of his own.

"What kind did you…" the boy smiled when he took his first bite, "How did you know?" he laughed a little before continuing with another spoonful.

The man smirked, "I had a hunch."

"I love peaches, peach tea, peach ice cream… I don't care, I love it." Toboe grinned, taking another bite.

"I know." Tsume smiled. He ate his own gelato slowly while the boy quickly finished his up. It was a little too sweet, but it was still very good. Maybe the kid was right? Finishing a meal with something sweet might become a new habit of his as well.

"So which did you get?" the boy asked him after a few minutes, an empty bowl in his hand.

"Coconut."

Toboe watched as Tsume continued eating his dessert, little bit by bit. He leaned his arm on the table, resting a cheek in the palm of his hand. As he took in the man's current demeanor, he thought of something, "You know… you are kind of like a coconut."

Tsume looked up from his dish, eyeing the boy curiously. His comment reminded him of something, almost like a feeling of déjà vu. But he couldn't put his finger on it.

"You are!" Toboe spoke again when the man didn't reply, "If you were a fruit, that's what you'd be."

The man remembered then… it was a couple of weeks after the kid had left him. He'd bought a few peaches at the market that day, even though he didn't like them. He was still so hung up on him… they reminded him of the boy, even smelled like him. It was then that he thought Toboe was like a peach, soft on the outside but strong on the inside... So here they were, a coconut and a peach?

"You're hard on the outside, but inside you're soft and sweet." He watched the boy smile softly, repeating his own similar thoughts. They were both quite the opposite from each other, weren't they? He frowned.

Toboe smirked then, quickly diving a spoon into the man's dish of ice cream. He smiled again; he'd been wanting to do that since he finished his own bowl. Tasting the bite he'd stolen, he moaned, "Mmm…. You're delicious too."

"St-stop it!" Tsume stuttered as his face turned red.

The boy just laughed at his embarrassment, happy at the reaction he was getting from teasing him like this. More minutes like this passed, the two finishing their dessert without saying much more. They were just enjoying the time they were spending together, occasionally flashing smiles across the table, along with a few eye rolls, of course.

A while later the man pushed back his chair and stood up, grabbing the ticket a waiter had left for them a few minutes ago. The boy stood up also, "I'm gonna wait outside while you pay."

"Alright. But I'm done for the day, don't you think?"

"Yeah, me too." Toboe picked up the bags at his feet as Tsume went to the counter to take care of the bill. The boy smiled at the thought of his new wardrobe, carrying the bags with him out the front door. He noticed the sun was getting low in the sky as he stepped out on the sidewalk.

Pausing for a moment, he stood there as people passed him each way. He looked around, breathing in the scent of the city. It wasn't big like the one he'd grown up in, but it was a lot bigger than the small towns he'd been staying in for the past year or so.

Noticing a shop next to the busy restaurant, he curiously walked over to see what was in the window. It was a home goods store, the window displaying cooking utensils and electrical appliances. He frowned… He wish he had his own kitchen like he used to… He missed those days.

It was then that he noticed someone from the corner of his eye. Glancing to his right, he began eyeing the stranger a few feet down from him who was also viewing the window display. He had dark eyes and hair, which was a little long, tied back into a ponytail.

Toboe frowned harder. Why did he seem so familiar to him?

The man turned to him then, raising his eyebrows, "What's up?" he asked.

The boy blushed, stepping back with one hand up. "Oh, um… nothing. I'm sorry…" He looked away again, feeling embarrassed for staring so long. He glanced to his left back towards the restaurant door, people still coming and going. Why was Tsume taking so long?

"Hey…" the man's voice spoke again. Toboe turned to look at him once more. "Don't I know you from somewhere?" he continued, standing straight and stepping away from the window. He put a hand to his chin, rubbing it. "Hmmm…"

The boy just stood there, unsure of who he was. He was trying to remember himself.

"Haha! I remember! I knew it!" the man finally recalled everything, patting his fist into his other hand. "I bought you food when you had no money… Remember? At that diner?"

Toboe didn't say anything at first, trying to recall that moment. Then he remembered, "Oh! Yes! Of course!" he smiled. "How funny!"

"I know…" the man smiled, "Toboe, right?"

"How did you…"

"I don't forget so easily."

"And tell me your name again. I'm sorry." Toboe lowered his head a little in apology.

"Keith."

"That's right!" the boy nodded. He glanced down at his feet, suddenly feeling a bit awkward. What did you say to someone who acted like your friend, but you barely knew him? "So…" he looked up again, "What brings you here?"

"Nothing much, what about you? You've changed a lot, I can see… You still traveling alone?" the man leaned against the brick wall next to him, still smiling.

Toboe shook his head, "No, I'm here with my… my friend."

The bell of the restaurant door chimed then, the silver haired man walking out, carrying a brown bag. He paused for a second before he saw Toboe standing one shop down and walked over to him. "Toboe, I bought a few of their danishes for breakfast. That ought to…" he trailed off in mid-sentence, seeing the other face just past the kid.

Tsume was frozen, his eyes wide as he began to recognize the familiar face standing before them. He couldn't move. The boy turned around smiling, "Tsume! I want you to meet my friend. He helped me when I was…" he frowned, "Tsume?"

Toboe quickly glanced back to Keith, the dark haired man's face no longer carefree but cynical as he glared past him to the taller man. The boy darted his eyes back to Tsume, confused and almost afraid. What was going on? He was about to say something to him, but caught himself as his eyes widened.

The older wolf's face held nothing but fear.

* * *

><p>Kya! : …I will try to get the next one up sooner than this. Again, sorry for the wait and I hope you enjoyed it!<p> 


	25. Chapter 25

Here we are again! For those of you not on deviant art, I mentioned on there the time constraints put on me since I started school again this semester. I am sorry that this chapter took long again, as I promised it wouldn't… But when my life gets a little crazy, my hobbies tend to get put on the back burner. Please don't give up though, we'll make it to the end soon. :)

I also will warn you that there's some veeeeery mature things in this chapter… For those on fanfiction dot net, please read the FYI below to get your fill, as this may be a cut version. Thanks and enjoy!

FYI: If you prefer the "uncut" version, please check out adult fanfiction dot net or deviant art.

Caution: Further chapters will contain mature content such as language and yaoi, Tsume/Toboe. Be forewarned.

Disclaimer: I do not own the characters or series of Wolf's Rain. They belong to BONES & Keiko Nobumoto. This story is non-profit for my own and others' enjoyment. Thank you. :)

**Tired of Running**

The three figures stood silently, frozen among the crowds that passed by them. The sounds of the city went on around them, ignoring the conflict that had begun. The sun cast their shadows onto the cement sidewalk beneath them, its light reflecting warm colors on their scowling faces.

"What's going on?" the boy finally spoke up, his voice timid as he looked back and forth between the two men. He was worried and fearful, sweat already trailing from his forehead. It felt like a western movie… Were they going to start shooting each other?

"Heh, I see…" the dark man answered, a hint of sarcasm in his voice. The boy turned back to face him as he spoke, "Nice way to repay me, kid."

The boy's frown became worse. Who was this man? He glanced back to his friend; it was certainly unusual that Tsume was frozen like this… He'd never seen him like this. Wait… he had mentioned there were people who after him. Was Keith one of them?

"You're with this guy?" Keith spoke again, gritting his teeth.

The boy kept his eyes on Tsume, watching his face change from fear to anger as he clutched onto the bag of baked goods. "Tsume, do you know…" He trailed off, realizing that he already knew the answer. The man bit his lip, not looking at the boy.

"Oh, this is too interesting." An amused Keith spoke, laughter in his voice.

The boy turned quickly to face him, shocked at the look on his face. He was smiling! Why was he smiling?

"Toboe, go to the car." Tsume spoke in a commanding and stern voice.

Toboe looked at him again, furrowing his brows. This man was no longer afraid, but ready for any attack.

"No, stay. It'll be fun!" the dark haired man smiled again.

"Tsume…" the boy breathed, clutching onto the bags in his hands. He could feel his heart beating faster and faster. He felt like he should be in fear for his life… the energy around them was building up darker and thicker.

"TOBOE, GO!" Tsume yelled this time, every bit of his voice sending out rage.

Toboe stumbled back in surprise, a small voice escaping his lips. He wanted to say something, he wanted to understand… he wanted to ask what this was… But he couldn't.

The boy watched as the two men stood facing each other, Keith's face now sent back into a scowl. He couldn't think. With that, he took off running the way they had come, listening to his friend's commands. He felt so weak, his heart pounding in fear as he felt tears already appearing in his eyes.

What was this? Wasn't there anything he could do? …He felt so helpless as he ran away from them. But this really was all he could do…

Tsume didn't take his eyes off the man before him as Toboe disappeared out of their sight. His mind was racing wildly as he grit his teeth. The gun was in the dash pocket of the jeep… He didn't even have a knife on him. Nothing… Furthermore, why wasn't he attacking him already?

He watched as the dark haired man glared at him, his eyes fuming in rage. He wasn't saying anything… The man couldn't take the silence any longer, "Say something!" he yelled.

Keith smiled again, slipping his hands into his pockets. "If I'd only known…"

"Known what?" Tsume growled.

"Toboe… I met him over a year ago. That town's actually another day or two southwest of here, I might add. He didn't have any money so I paid for his food. We talked for a while, you know, about this and that. He said he was…" He continued going on and on, causing Tsume to bite his lip as he grew angrier. Why was he giving him so much detail?!

"…So innocent too. I was worried about him… He reminded me of someone." Keith looked up at him then, losing the smile. "What is he to you?"

Tsume bit his lip, stepping back as the realization hit him. "N-nothing!" he quickly answered, "He's just a kid I gave a ride to."

"You're a liar." The man sneered.

He knew from the start that Keith wouldn't believe him. He didn't have such luck as that… His mind was racing. Why had they waited so long to leave town? How stupid could he have been? He knew this man was following him… But… why weren't there any others?

"Come with me." Keith spoke, his voice calm and collected.

"Like hell."

"If you don't, you'll regret it." His voice was menacing.

Tsume could feel sweat dripping from his brow. He knew it. He knew he was going to get the kid killed! Why did he stay with him? …He should have left that night while he was still asleep back at the campfire. He would have regretted it, yes. But wasn't it worse to regret getting him killed?

Keith gestured towards him, beckoning him to follow as he stepped into an alleyway near them. The man followed reluctantly, biting his lip. He sat the brown bag at the entrance of the alleyway, venturing in further after the other man.

There had to be others… Wait… He stopped in his tracks. What if he sent them after Toboe?

"Are you coming?" Keith called after him, several feet ahead.

He couldn't have sent them… He didn't have the time. But… if he had a phone, he could always call. That's probably what he was planning if he didn't put up with this. Tsume bit his lip again, continuing to walk after him further and further into the dark alleyways.

It seemed to get darker and gloomier as they went along, evening passing a few worn out housing structures and yards. They finally stopped after a while, in one of the old yards stretched between alleyways. It was still dark as the skies above them could barely be seen through the cracks of the tall old buildings.

He looked up at the building in front of them, no doubt an old apartment from years back. The windows were broken, some glass panes not even in at all. It was grey and dirty, filled with cracks and the yard scattered with broken boxes and trash. There was water dripping from the roof, falling into puddles created by broken cement, weeds growing around them. It was falling apart. There weren't any people out either. It looked abandoned.

Tsume turned his face back to the man standing in front of him about ten feet. He narrowed his eyes. Was this going to be his graveyard?... He was fine with that, but…

"If you're going to kill me, I want a deal first." Tsume growled, standing straight. "I've got money. A lot of it… You can have it all if you promise me to leave the kid alone. I know you, Keith. You can't break a promise."

"Idiot." Keith turned to him, "I don't want to kill you."

Tsume breathed in, surprised at the answer he had gotten. He watched as the man pulled one hand out of his pocket and began examining it. He frowned, "These hands have killed many. I've grown tired of it, actually…" He looked at him, scowling, "But I did make a promise to find you… which I did. And another promise I made to myself was to avenge her. Which I will."

Keith stepped over to him casually, smiling once more.

Tsume didn't move as the man came near inches away from his face, staring him in the eyes. "So what is he to you? Your brother, a friend or… your lover?"

Tsume stepped back, his blood boiling.

"Bingo!" Keith grinned, standing up straight. "How sweet… My poor sister. She must've been a poor lay for you to turn into a fag…" He looked up, noticing that Tsume wasn't saying anything, just glaring at him. He continued, "So how long have you been with him? I think he mentioned you before… that means…" he stuck his tongue out, his face showing disgust. "Sick... So you like fucking little boys?"

"Shut the fuck up! You don't know anything!"

Keith laughed, "So that one finally got you? Should've known... It must have been the kid that wanted it? So he's the sick little prick then? You couldn't help it though… Such an innocent face he has, a nice ass I might add…" he sneered, "I should've known that about you… You always did look at me funny when we were little. Danielle was the closest thing you could get next to me!" He laughed again.

"Is this all you brought me out here for, to mock me?!" Tsume growled, leaning forward. He was getting tired of the antics. It wasn't much different from when they were kids in that home for unwanted children… This was so Keith, only now he was much more perverse and threatening.

"No…" came a muttered reply. The man stepped towards him, suddenly swinging his leg without warning. Tsume didn't expect that, his legs knocked out from under him as he fell to the ground. He bit his lip, quickly trying to find his footing again but was kicked upside the head.

He fell back, hitting the back of his head against a broken fence. He winced when he felt a sharp part of it pressing into the back of his neck. Darting his glance back, he saw Keith's foot coming at him again. He couldn't dodge it; he was blocked on every side.

But instead of landing another attack on him, the man just pressed his boot against his chest. Tsume looked up, glaring at the man who stood above him, his hands in both pockets again. He nudged the end of his foot against the taller man's chin, causing him to wince again. Each time he pressed against him, he was pushing him into the sharp broken fence.

"I thought you weren't going to kill me?" Tsume smirked, trying to push a button.

"Yeah, I know." Keith smiled, his eyes gleaming. "I like your bandages, by the way. Suits you… so rugged. Is that what my men did?" suddenly his demeanor changed, "…The ones you killed?!" He pressed into him again, the man underneath him biting his lip in pain. He could feel blood trickling down his back from the fresh wound on his neck.

"St-stop!" Tsume gasped, latching onto the man's boot.

"Is that what my sister said before she died?! STOP?!" he screamed in his rage, pressing his boot again.

With that, Keith was flipped over by Tsume grabbing his foot and throwing him off. He landed on the ground with a thud, seeing that the other man was now on his feet again. He watched him turn to run and panicked, "No!" he growled, quickly pulling a gun out of his pocket.

Aiming it, he found a perfect shot. He didn't want to kill him just yet, but it appeared he had no choice.

But just as Keith began to pull down on the trigger, he screamed out in pain as a viscous snarl echoed through the alleyways. His hand was slashed open and he dropped the gun in the process. He immediately jumped to his feet, holding his wounded hand with the other.

He bent over, not knowing what had happened. Frowning, he glanced up as the blood trickled from his wound and dropped onto the ground. Before him he saw a red animal, its teeth snarling at him. It was in an attack stance, ready to move with its hackles raised.

"So this is the dog you used to kill my sister and her men…" Keith spoke with a smile, regaining his senses. He stood up straight, noticing Tsume about twenty feet from him. He knew he hadn't run away just yet. He still held all the power.

Tsume was shocked, seeing Toboe in wolf form standing in front of Keith. He'd saved him.

"The one the news reported, right?" Keith called to him, "I was there watching it with you. I remember." He smiled then, pointing the gun directly at the beast in front of him. "Well, here's to you, dog."

Keith didn't even have a chance to fire as he heard a grow He was hit so hard that the gun flew out of his hand, flying into a wall nearby and landing on the ground far away from him. He was now on the ground, looking up at a grey dog that had him pinned.

"No, that was me." It growled at him, its teeth sharp with his blood. What was this? …It couldn't be… Could it? His eyes widened, "No, please, no!" He cried out, throwing his arm in front of his face.

"Why not?! …I'll finish this!" the silver wolf snarled. But just as he was about to go for the man's throat, a voice cried out from behind him.

"TSUME!"

Tsume stopped, turning his head to look at the boy behind him. He had let go of his true form and was now standing there, his face in a frown. He looked down, "…Let's just go."

The silver wolf uncurled his lips, his fangs no longer showing. He lowered his head, "I can't…"

"Yes, you can." Toboe spoke again, reaching a hand out to him. "Let's go."

Tsume reluctantly stood up, his wolf form disappearing from as he backed off and away from Keith. He turned to follow the boy, his face still ridden with rage and aggression. Toboe began running with his companion on his heels, anxious to get away from the dark haired man before he tried anything else.

Keith couldn't believe what he was seeing, men turning into wolves… wolves turning into men…

He hesitated for a moment before dropping his arm to his side and sitting up, "That's right! Run! RUN, YOU FUCKERS!" he screamed as they ran away, leaving him there in that old abandoned complex.

…

The door slammed loudly, the man pressed against it as the boy stumbled back behind him. They were back at the motel again, escaping their deaths once again. It was already dark out. The boy bit his lip as he watched the man lock the door, still breathing loudly.

The ride back here had been long and excruciating, complete silence between them. This Keith guy was someone from Tsume's past… He'd heard everything they said from the very beginning.

The boy had followed the two men through the alleyways. He knew something wasn't right and he couldn't leave Tsume alone with him… He was right for doing that. He could have been shot and killed… It was hard enough when he watched him go down the first time, wanting to jump in then as Keith kicked him… but he couldn't.

He did, however, manage to grab the bag of baked goods that Tsume left behind. Setting it on the table, he turned on a light before he remembered something else… He himself had appeared as a wolf… but Tsume changed right in front of Keith… That was not good.

Biting his lip, he turned to his friend, "Tsume, you showed him your true form! You can't do that! Now he knows…" the boy put a hand to his forehead, worried about their situation, "This will make it worse… Kalev said-"

"Why didn't you tell me, Toboe?!" Tsume turned around, screaming at him.

Toboe paused, frowning before he realized that he was being accused, "Me?! What about you?!"

"This is all your fault!"

"Why is it my fault?!"

Tsume turned away, fuming. "I should have left that night… But I didn't. I stayed with you to make you happy… But…" he was beginning to lower his temper by talking it out, but quickly angered again, "This is going to get both of us killed... Why didn't you just let me go?" He shot a glare at him, his teeth gritting.

Toboe was really angry now, "There you go again! Blaming me like always! You're too hot headed to do anything right! You would have killed him and made things even worse if it weren't for me!" he slammed his fist onto the table to make a point, "If it wasn't for you, we wouldn't be in this big mess!"

"You're right."

The reply was plain and simple. The boy stopped, his eyes widening, "What?"

"You're right. I should leave… I should have left long ago."

"Tsume…" Toboe bit his lip, feeling his heart quickening. His anger was subsiding, but leaving something worse in its place, sadness.

"This whole thing was a mistake."

"…Don't say that." The boy choked, looking down.

"Why not? It's true!" Tsume growled, "Every time we try to make this work…" he bit his lip, closing his eyes, "…It's not going to work. The whole world is against us, Toboe." The boy just shook his head, still not looking at him. He continued, his voice calming a little, "From the very start I knew that, but…" he looked away from him, closing his eyes, "I still wanted to try… even if it didn't matter in the end."

Toboe glanced up as he watched Tsume turn completely away from him, hiding his face. He didn't want him to see that he was hurt, did he? …The boy couldn't help but feel sorry for him, immediately reaching out to wrap his arms around him from behind.

He felt the man's hand place itself over the top of his as he spoke, "This whole thing… it's my fault. Every mistake I ever made…"

"Tsume, please… Stop…" He wanted to do something… He wanted to help him…

Toboe let go of him, walking around to the man's front side so that he could face him. When he wouldn't look at him, he placed his hands on the man's cheeks. When he pulled him into a soft kiss, he was surprised that Tsume didn't refuse. "It's going to be ok…" he muttered once, parting from his lips for a second.

The man kissed him again and he felt his arms wrapping around his middle. Toboe moaned a little, giving into the touch of Tsume's hands touching his back. Without noticing, he felt himself being backed up, the man's grip tightening around him.

His eyes widened when a tongue was slipped into his mouth and he groaned, closing his eyes. He wanted to say his name, but he couldn't. He was being smothered… Suddenly and without warning, he was slammed into the wall behind him. The kiss was broken off and he gasped, pain surging through his back from the impact.

"Ts-tsume!" he cried, feeling his mouth now on his neck. Everything was going so fast that he didn't know what was happening. "Tsume!" he spoke again, but there was no answer. He felt hands reaching up under his clothes and his eyes widened. "No!" he gasped. He wasn't stopping though.

This couldn't be happening again…

Toboe's demeanor changed suddenly and he growled with a yell, pressing both of his hands against the man's chest and pushing him away with all of his strength. Tsume was thrown back from him, abruptly landing on the bed across from the wall.

He looked up, his eyes widening as he caught the site of the boy in front of him. His clothing was out of place and his shirt undone, his hair a mess and out of its braid. There was already a mark left on his neck from where his lips were… He looked away, frowning in embarrassment.

The boy placed a hand over his mouth, shocked at what had just happened… After everything they'd come to… Had it really reverted back to that? But…

He was reverting back too, wasn't he?

He frowned. It seemed like ever since they'd found each other, he was slowly going back into old habits… He wasn't a child anymore and here he'd been acting like that this entire time. Was that why he was being treated the way he was? Like a helpless child… He felt so selfish now, even though it was nice to have someone take care of him…

But the man in front of him… he couldn't be everything that he wanted.

He was broken, just as he once was… The one that needed taking care of the most was not him, but the person sitting in front of him. Couldn't he be that for him?

He'd seen that the night he found him, the man latching onto him as he didn't want to leave. He was strong then, holding him and assuring him that they would make it through all of this… Had that just changed overnight?

Had he learned nothing about being stronger?

Toboe shook his head, regaining his confidence. He frowned, stepping over to the man sitting on the bed. He was clutching the blankets next to him, biting his lip. "Tsume…" the boy spoke, standing over him. The man wouldn't look at him.

"Tsume," he spoke again, his voice tender as he placed his hands on the man's cheeks. He slowly turned him to face him, but Tsume's right eye glanced away, avoiding his eyes. The boy moved his hands to the back of the man's head, beginning to untie the bandages that were wrapped around the left side of his face.

Tsume placed a hand around one of the boy's wrists, "Don't…" he muttered.

Toboe paused a moment before he ignored the request and continued. As he slowly stripped away everything, he finally saw the wound he'd been hiding from him. The scar was almost completely healed, a shade lighter than his skin. It stretched from above his left brow down to his bottom lip.

The man blinked both of his eyes, finally looking up at him. With a smile, the boy leaned in and pressed his lips against Tsume's left brow, then his eye, tracing his scar down to his cheek. He kissed his lips then, slowly pulling away after he was done.

When Toboe tried to look at him, the man glanced away once more, frowning. The boy frowned as well, moving the man's hair away with his fingers and kissing his forehead. "Toboe…" the man breathed, closing his eyes.

Toboe leaned one knee into the bed beside him, standing over him. He wrapped his arms around him, pulling the man into his chest. He latched on, burying his head into him. "I'm so sorry…" he spoke, his words ragged as he held on.

Tsume gripped onto the boy's clothing, pulling him closer. He breathed in the sweet scent again, finding himself becoming lost once more. No… He couldn't go there… What was wrong with him? He couldn't be trusted… he couldn't…

His mind wavered as he felt Toboe's hands placed on his cheeks again, raising his face to meet him. He hesitantly looked into the boy's hazel eyes, filled with nothing but tenderness. "Please don't," he muttered, shooting his glance downwards. He gritted his teeth, his brows furrowed.

Placing his hands over the boy's wrists, he turned his palms around. He could feel tears escaping his eyes and he slowly kissed a hand, its fingers still touching his cheeks. "Toboe…" he spoke again, "I'm so sorry…" He kissed a wrist and then the other hand, each time slowly and delicately.

Toboe frowned. He realized that Tsume was not only apologizing for what happened just now… but for what happened to him over a year ago… for everything. This man before him had changed, he could see that now… He was still lost in his own regret.

A part of the boy wished he had never walked out that door… But then he remembered wise words, that it took time to change a heart, to heal wounds… But he also recalled that time did not wait for one to act, either.

He placed his hands on the back of Tsume's head, pressing his forehead against his. He closed his eyes, just as the man's were. "Tsume… nothing has changed..."

"Toboe-"

"Even when we were apart," he placed both knees on the side of him, sitting on his lap, "I still cared for you… There wasn't a day I didn't stop to think of you…" he touched the scar on his face, frowning, "Where you were, what you were doing…" he looked him in the eyes then, "If you ever thought of me…"

Tsume bit his lip as the boy withdrew his hand and placed it behind his neck, pressing their foreheads together again. "I remember everything… our lives before, this life…" He took the man's hand, placing it on his cheek and rubbing against it, closing his eyes. "Everything around us has changed so much…" The boy bit his lip, tears escaping down his cheeks.

"But…" he continued, his voice still soft, "No matter what happened, I could never hate you…no matter how hard I tried. I just couldn't… I'd already forgiven you long ago…" He met his golden eyes then, "I still love you, Tsume… I always have."

Tsume frowned. What was he supposed to say to that? …He couldn't say anything at all.

But it didn't matter. Toboe smiled as he leaned in, pressing his lips against his. The man reluctantly gave in, wrapping his arms around him… He didn't feel anger anymore… he didn't even feel regret. He felt whole… something he did not recognize.

Maybe paradise had been here all along… just waiting for him.

The boy moaned when he pressed the small of his back, bringing him fully into his lap. He responded by burying his face into his collarbone, kissing his soft flesh. He felt Toboe's arms around him, clinging onto the back of his shirt as his tears continued to fall.

"I wish…" the man breathed, his voice full of sadness, "I wish we could just fade away from here."

He then felt his chin being lifted by the boy's hand, forcing him to look up at him. His hazel eyes were soft, his smile tender. "We can…" he spoke in a hushed voice, bringing his lips down to meet him once more.

Tsume could feel everything begin to fade away as he kissed him… All of his worries, all of his fears… It didn't matter. This was all that he ever wanted… to feel safe, to feel loved…

He was home.

…

The two figures stayed like that for a while, the man resting his head on the boy's chest as he lay on top of him. He breathed in heavily, taking in the scent of peaches mixed with sweat and his own musk. He could feel his heart beating beneath his face, his breathing and pulse beginning to slow down once more.

The man didn't want to say anything, afraid that he might ruin it. Instead, he propped himself up on his arms to look at him. The boy's long hair was a tangled mess, spilling out around him and in his face. His chest rose and fell as he breathed in, sweat beading on his skin. His cheeks red and wet from his tears, his lips quivering as he began to relax. His hazel eyes glistened when he caught his glance, his face softening for him.

"Toboe…" the man breathed, raising his head to kiss him. The boy didn't move; he was too exhausted. But he did welcome the kiss, his lips slowly parting for him. "I love you…" the man whispered as he slowly pulled his head back before kissing him again.

Toboe closed his eyes, tears spilling out once more. He smiled through the kiss, not being able to help it. The last and only time he'd ever heard Tsume say that to him was the day he left. He could remember resting against him in the bathtub, his lover's arms wrapped around him as he tried to keep him there.

He had whispered those words to him, but he was too hurt to even want them...

But now… everything was different. Everything had changed.

They were recreating their memories, weren't they?

Toboe didn't say anything as Tsume rested next to him, wrapping his arms around him and pulling him close. He nuzzled under his chin, still smiling as the entwined their legs together. As the boy began to drift off to sleep next to him, the man sighed.

He didn't feel regret, not even fear or sorrow. Everything around them, the world, the other figures in their life… Nothing meant more to him than the boy right now. The world could wait. All he ever wanted was here in his arms at long last.

Tsume kissed the top of the boy's head, hugging him tightly. He was already asleep, wasn't he?

As he laid there in the dark, he made a promise to himself… A promise he failed to keep a long time ago as a red wolf lay lifeless in his arms… his heart stricken with grief as he was not able to be all that was needed of him… But this time was different…

He would take Toboe to paradise… no matter the cost.

…

"If it's such a big fucking deal, then you do it!" a man yelled angrily. The sound of something thrown against the wall and shattering apart echoed through the old apartment. The dirty carpet pressed down beneath a pair of small feet that crept out from a dark hallway, lit up from a dim light nearby.

As he slowly peered around a corner, the light also caught the boy's short silver hair. He appeared to be no older than seven. He was dressed in an old t-shirt that was too big for him, his legs and feet bare. He had been awakened by the loud voices coming from the living room, now peering around the corner to see what was going on.

It was dark out, the changing pictures of the television casting light onto a woman's face that sat on the worn out sofa. Her hair was silver like the boy's, but long and tangled. Her clothes were as worn out as the sofa, stains on her shirt as she sniffled. The man stood facing the woman with the vacant expression, his clothing ripped

"Answer me, dammit!" the boy turned his head to the man who was glaring at the woman sitting in front of him.

"Fuuuuck you… fine…" she slurred, her tone without any feeling, "Do what chuu want…" She looked forward as she lazily lounged on the torn sofa, her eyes glazed over as she stared at the blaring television.

"What is this? …" the man was seething, his face almost red, "Did you use my shit again?!"

The woman didn't answer, so he continued, "How much did you use?!" He glanced to the side when she once again did not answer. He threw his hand over his face as he groaned, "FUCK!" He then slowly wiped his hand down over his face, his teeth gritted, "Dammit, Kana… You know… I had a buyer and every-fucking-time… you just gotta…"

He didn't finish the sentence, seeing the little boy standing in the hallway, "What the fuck are you lookin' at, ya little shit?" he growled.

The boy bit his lip, quickly looking down but not moving. He closed his eyes, feeling his stomach sink, his pulse racing as he listened to the man approach him. He couldn't run… He knew that if he did, it would make everything worse… It always did.

"Hey!" the man roared, "You answer me when I'm talking to you!" He stood over the child. It angered him when he didn't speak up. He abruptly smacked him against the head, sending him into the wall. The boy yelped, almost falling over. He quickly looked up at the man, his golden eyes tearing up, "I'm sorry!" he cried, before looking down again, "…Is Mom okay?" he muttered.

The man started laughing, causing the boy to look up at him, "Look at her!" he laughed, gesturing to the woman on the sofa. "She doesn't give a shit about you!" he grinned, sneering at the boy, "You wanna know something about yer mom?"

The boy looked down, biting his lip as the man smirked, "All she cares about is getting high and getting fucked! You're nothing to her... You're just a mistake."

"Don't say that!" the boy yelled right before gasping, throwing a hand over his mouth. His eyes widened as the man's face changed, scowling at him. The boy quickly went to cover his face but it was too late.

"Don't tell me what to do!" the man yelled angrily, grabbing the boy by his shirt and throwing him against the living room wall.

He cried out in pain, falling on the ground and quickly wrapping around himself as tightly as he could. He winced when the man kicked him, "Dad, I'm sorry!" he yelped as his father kicked him again.

"Dooon't…" the boy's mother moaned, "He's not… He ain't doing any thang…" She reached out just barely before dropping her arm, smiling to herself. "Ohh yea… there it is." The woman threw her head back, practically drooling as she ignored what was going on.

The man kicked him a third time, driving his shoe in with an angry grunt. The boy choked out tears as the man stepped back, breathing heavily. He paused for a minute before he walked over to the sofa where the woman sat, "Move!" he commanded and she wearily did so, moving a couple feet away with a smile still on her face.

The couch creaked as he roughly sat down, bending over to the messy coffee table and pulling an old box onto his lap. When he opened it, he frowned, glancing to the woman on his right. "Stupid bitch," he muttered as she ignored him. He sighed, going back to the box and pulling out what he needed.

The boy quietly sat up, moving back to the wall to lean against it. He didn't wipe the tears that had begun to dry on his face, watching as his father tied off his arm with a dirty rag. He knew what was coming. Slowly, but surely, he began to crawl backwards to the hallway, not wanting to watch.

The man didn't even hear or see him and when he was finally in the dark once more, he got up and ran back to his bedroom. He quickly closed the door behind him and locked it, even though he wasn't allowed to do so. But he didn't care.

Looking down, he could feel the fear subsiding… but sadness taking its place. He frowned and shook his head when tears came back. He couldn't do that… it only made things worse. Nodding to himself, he climbed back into his bed, pulling the blankets up over his head.

He felt safe that way, the sheets protecting him like armor… But it didn't always work. Here he was again, just waiting for anything to happen… Depending if his dad was still angry… No. He didn't want to think about it.

With a sigh, he threw the blankets back. He stared at the ceiling for a long while, listening for any activity outside his door… But nothing came… Except for tears. He couldn't hold them back any longer.

The boy cried, letting the warm tears fall from his face onto his pillow beneath him as he closed his eyes. Tomorrow would be different. He would stop looking. He would stop asking. He would stop caring… Then everything would be ok.

If he didn't care… then they couldn't hurt him anymore.

…

The silver haired man suddenly opened his eyes, finding himself staring at the ceiling above him. It was dark and quiet as he lay there, finding his surroundings. As he glanced to his left, everything in the room seemed to be painted blue by the night. And the only sound he could hear was a cricket chirping from outside the motel window. What time was it?

"Mmm.." a groan sounded next to him and he turned his head, seeing Toboe lying next to him. He nuzzled into his shoulder, pressing against him. The man's face softened and he smiled, turning to face him. When he wrapped his arms around him and pulled him closer beneath the blankets, the boy moaned again.

"Ts-tsume?" he spoke groggily.

Tsume pulled back to kiss his forehead before looking at him, resting his head on the pillow. The boy just stared back at him, his hazel eyes still sleepy. They stayed like that for a while, just taking each other in before Toboe slowly reached out to his lover, placing his fingers over the man's scar on the right side of his face.

The man frowned when he did so, but he didn't pull back. He gently traced his fingers from Tsume's brow, over his eye, down his cheek and to his lips. He watched as Tsume closed his eyes, still frowning. It was when he withdrew his hand that the man opened his mouth to speak, "Before I found you…" he bit his lip, "…I was going from city to city, trying to keep Keith off my trail… I came to know someone and I stayed there for a while."

Toboe frowned, resting his head on the pillow next to him as he spoke.

"She and her brothers, they took me in without question. They gave me a job, a place to live… I began to think of them as friends..." He bit his lip, his tone slowly changing to frustration, "I stayed too long… It's because of me they're dead…" He placed his hand over the right side of his face, feeling the scabbed wound beneath his fingertips.

"This scar will forever remind me of what I did to them… what I didn't do..."

Toboe reached out to him, placing his hand over Tsume's. He was hurting, he could tell. He wanted to say something… but what could he say? What was he supposed to do?

Reluctantly, he pulled the man's hand away from his face, uncovering the scar. Searching his face, he wished Tsume would look at him, but he wouldn't. He watched as the man bit his lip, "The other scars on my body…"

Toboe glanced down at the man's flesh, his arms, chest that were scarred here and there, just as he said, "These are nothing to me, they only remind me of the living I've made since you left."

The boy frowned, withdrawing his hand. He couldn't but feel a little hurt when he said that. It brought back painful memories. But just as he began to pull away, Tsume's hand grabbed his wrist. He was startled slightly as the man placed his hand on his chest, over the mark from long ago. Toboe had remembered him saying it was a birthmark, but he remembered it from their past life.

"This scar…" he spoke raggedly, still not looking at him, "… is to remind me of the mistakes I made, what I've done… my sins-"

"Tsume, you don't have to-"

"No!" he growled angrily, finally facing him. The boy's face was filled with concern, his brow furrowed and eyes wide as he listened, "…Long before I knew you and the others... I was a part of another pack." His voice had softened again, "We were in hiding, but they found us… the humans. The wolves… they fought for their lives, sacrificing themselves for each other even. But not me… I ran." He looked down again, gritting his teeth. "When my pack leader caught me, he gave me this scar…"

"Tsume…" the boy softened, moving closer, "You were young, right? You didn't know…" He went to touch his face, but his hand was quickly dismissed. He sat up, frowning as he held his hand to his chest.

"Toboe, don't you get it?! I was a coward!" Tsume growled before pressing his head into the pillow, not wanting to face him as his voice softened, choking out each word, "All of this… everything… even now. It's all my fault… I can't help it… I told you that I would prove myself to you... But I can't. Everything I've ever done was a mistake… my whole life. I'm nothing more than a mis-"

"Stop it!"

Tsume glanced up at him, the boy's face determined and angry. "You can't say that!" he growled. The man was surprised at first, but his facial expression slowly changed back to frustration. He was now lying on his stomach, his arms holding the pillow underneath his upper chest. He turned his head away from the boy, resting his head on the pillow, "Why not?" he asked, part of him hoping an answer would not follow, but it did.

"We all make mistakes, Tsume." Toboe's tone was soft, "Don't you think I have regrets too?"

Tsume frowned as he listened, not wanting to face him.

The boy frowned, looking down at his bare feet, "…Just feeling sorry for yourself," He didn't want to say it, but he knew he had to, "Does it really change anything?"

"Fuck you…" he heard the man mutter.

"Tsume, I'm serious!" he frowned, "Blaming ourselves for everything, it changes nothing… We can't help but wish we'd done things differently… If we let them, our regrets will eat us alive until we're dead inside… But that doesn't mean we can't try to fix them… Our mistakes… Nothing changes overnight… all wounds heal, but it takes time." He moved closer, expecting Tsume to bat him away, but he didn't. Toboe smiled, "I love you, Tsume… regardless of what you think is your fault… Even though it's not."

Tsume bit his lip, rolling back on to his side and looking at him, "Toboe…" he muttered, "Say what you want, but-"

He stopped when the boy crawled next to him, placing one arm on the other side of the man. His other arm rested on his leg as he sat looking down, leaning over him. The boy's eyes were glistening as he smiled, causing the man to lose his frown, "Toboe," he spoke again, looking up at him.

Toboe pulled his hair back behind an ear before placing his hand on the man's stomach, finding a small scar next to his navel. "All of these scars…" he began moving his fingers across the man's body, tracing each small cut and scar, "They remind me of my own regrets… the time I lost without you." He frowned, as did the man.

The boy paused for a moment, before glancing at him, "But I'm here now…" he reached up to stroke the scar on the man's voice and smiled. He watched as Tsume lay there, still looking up at him and not saying anything, so he continued, "This scar reminds me of when I found you again… It reminds me of what's to come… the paradise we'll find."

Toboe bent over to kiss the scar, closing his eyes. He pulled back, not looking at the man beneath him as he moved to the newer wound on his shoulder blade. It was the bite mark he'd left the night before. He softly kissed it as well, "This one… It reminds me that you are mine…"

The boy sat up, taking the man's hand in his and placing it on the scar that was on his own shoulder blade, "…Just as I am yours."

"Is that why you…" Tsume muttered, trailing off.

"Yes… " the boy nodded, "You probably didn't know then, but it was your instinct as a wolf... We are mated for life." Closing his eyes, he smiled, his hands still keeping Tsume's in place over his mark. "This scar you left on me has always reminded me of you... I could never forget you." He opened his eyes again and slowly reached down to touch the large mark on the man's chest.

"And this scar…" he smiled again, "This one is my favorite because it reminds me of who you are… the grey wolf that I fell in love with."

It was then that he watched Tsume sit up to meet him, pressing his lips against his. Giving in, he closed his eyes, moaning when he felt his lover already becoming aroused as he leaned against him. Their kiss was not broken as Tsume laid him back down, resting on top of him.

Toboe opened his eyes for a second when he felt Tsume's tongue slip into his mouth. Moaning again, he closed his eyes once more and wrapped his arms around him to pull him closer.

Tsume could feel his insides churning, wanting him again. But before he made another move, he pulled back, propping himself on his elbows. He watched as the boy opened his eyes, his face blushing as he looked up at him. "Tsume?" he breathed.

The man didn't say anything, just gazing at him and smiling. He still couldn't believe that this was real, Toboe's feelings for him… after everything he'd done… He still loved him.

He searched the boy's face, his embarrassment apparent as he hardened against him. His long hair was still a tangled mess, spreading out around him, a few strands in his face. His cheeks were red, his hazel eyes glistening and his lips pink as he breathed in and out. "What?" the boy blinked, asking in a hushed voice. He was still so innocent…

"Nothing," Tsume smiled down at him, "It's just that… you're so beautiful."

Toboe blushed harder, "Stop…" he muttered, smiling a little as he glanced to the side.

"Why?" the man smirked.

"Because you're embarrassing me…"

Tsume laughed a little, brushing the few strands of auburn hair out of the boy's face. He played with the hair in his fingers, "Your hair is so long…" He brought the strands to his lips, taking in the sweet scent and closing his eyes, "It's nice… and it suits you."

"I thought you hated it?" the boy's tone sounded a little frustrated as the man opened his eyes, curiously, "Why would you think that?" he asked.

"You said I looked like a girl…"

Tsume smiled, saying the first thing that came to mind, "You do… a very pretty girl though."

Toboe frowned, which caused him to laugh.

"You're mean." The boy glared up at him and he laughed again. He leaned over him to kiss his forehead, closing his eyes, "…My beautiful princess." He muttered.

"Tsume, stop." Toboe wasn't happy. The man just smirked, moving his lips to the boy's and kissing him. When he didn't kiss back, he propped himself up on his arms again, just looking at him and smiling. The boy watched him, the frown still on his face before he spoke up, "You're imagining me in a dress, aren't you?"

"No!" Tsume laughed again, resting on top of him and nuzzling under his chin. He kissed his neck, poking his tongue out before the boy laughed as well. When he chuckled again, the boy growled, "It's not funny!" he giggled through his anger. The man withdrew his tongue, "Then why are you laughing?"

"Because it tickles!" Toboe hit him on the shoulder, but not enough to matter. He laughed again as the man continued kissing his neck, not say anything more. It was when he began to trail kisses down along his collar bone and chest that Toboe felt himself becoming aroused as well. He closed his eyes, leaning his head back over the edge of the bed.

He opened his eyes and moaned when Tsume's kisses finally started going lower. But then something caught his eyes, the clock on the dresser. It was almost six in the morning… The sun would be rising any minute if it hadn't already… They would need to get on the road soon.

With everything that had happened yesterday, they'd both gotten lost in their thoughts… their placement of time… No doubt Keith would eventually find them… The entire night had been lost to them…

"Something wrong?" Tsume lifted his head up, looking at the boy. It had been a while ago that he had stopped touching him, his moaning and even his body giving up.

Toboe lifted his head, meeting his golden eyes, "No… It's just that…" he glanced to the clock, the man following his gaze and frowning. The boy continued, "I'm just worried… if we should get on the road soon…"

Tsume paused for a moment, not saying anything right away. He glanced down before pressing his lips against the boy's abdomen once more. "Uhmmm…" the boy breathed, squirming beneath him.

"It's fine..."

Toboe glanced at him again, the man's facial expression without emotion. "Tsume?" he asked, worried a little. He was about to say something more before his eyes widened and he threw his head back, moaning again at the man's mouth on him.

"Not yet…" Tsume muttered, "I'm tired of running."

* * *

><p>Okay, so I kind of didn't want to leave it on a cliffhanger, cause I thought that would be mean to do that too often... hehe. …So, thoughts?<p> 


	26. Chapter 26

Oh my goodness, how looooong has it been?! :D Did you think I abandoned it? ..No, I wouldn't do that because I know how it feels to get all involved in a story before you find out it hasn't been updated since, say… 2004? Hehe…

Anyways, I got really tied up in school and I work a lot during the holidays but I'm back again. I'm hoping it won't be this time consuming here on out. Next semester promises to be not as hellacious. Well, as always enjoy! And comments are most definitely inspiring and appreciated!

FYI: If you prefer the "uncut" version, please check out adult fanfiction dot net or deviant art.

Caution: May contain mature content such as language and yaoi, Tsume/Toboe. Be forewarned.

Disclaimer: I do not own the characters or series of Wolf's Rain. They belong to BONES & Keiko Nobumoto. This story is non-profit for my own and others' enjoyment. Thank you. :)

**I Won't Bite**

Clouds of steam slowly made their way to the ceiling, fogging up the walls. Water splashed repeatedly against the tiles, slowly dripping down to the floor of the tub from the overhead nozzle. Two pairs of bare feet, one set larger and darker in contrast stepping closer to the delicate ones. The two figures' shadows were cast upon the shower curtain, a giggle sounding from the shorter one.

The boy laughed as he felt strong fingers massaging soap into his scalp and hair. The soap smelt of peppermint, filling his nostrils and making his skin tingle. He smiled when his companion's hands gently pulled his head back by his hair, fingers running through the strands of his soapy long hair.

Opening his eyes, he looked up and backwards at his lover's golden eyes, a smirk on his face. "What's so funny?" the man asked. The boy didn't say anything, closing his eyes again as he smiled and pulled his head back. He moved back to stand underneath the shower faucet, letting the soap wash out of his wet hair.

When he began running his fingers through the auburn strands, he felt lips being pressed against the back of his shoulder. Smiling, he slowly turned around to face his taller companion who went to kiss him. He didn't kiss back however, ending it sooner rather than later.

As he pulled away, he reached for the bottle of shampoo, pouring a bit of it into his palm. After doing so, he reached up, soaking the man's silver hair with the soap. "Your turn, Tsume!" he smiled, beginning to massage it in.

But it was when he did this that the man frowned, "That's okay, Toboe," he slightly batted the boy's hands away, "I only did that because you asked me to." He stepped back, but the boy ignored him and followed his movement. He wasn't going to listen.

But surprisingly enough, Tsume didn't decline him a second time. He gave in, just glancing away as the boy continued, his fingers slowly massaging into his scalp. He couldn't help but close his eyes for a second, a small moan escaping his lips.

"It feels good, doesn't it?" Toboe smiled.

The man didn't say anything, still not looking at him. It was when he felt the boy's lips on his that his eyes widened. He was still shampooing him when he did so and Tsume couldn't help but give into the kiss. He slowly stepped towards him, the boy moving back underneath the showerhead.

Toboe felt his back press against the tiled wall, their kiss breaking. He looked up as Tsume stood above him, tilting his head back to let the water from the faucet overhead wash over his soapy hair. The boy glanced down, feeling a small blush creep into his cheeks. But then he saw something that made him even more red.

Quickly glancing away, he bit his lip.

That was when he felt the man's grasp on his chin, turning him back to face him. He caught his golden eyes in his hazel ones, melting underneath that familiar gaze. He breathed in before the man pressed into him for another kiss, their bodies touching.

"Tsume…" he moaned, tilting his head back as the man's lips moved to his neck. He watched the steam rising as the water fell, his eyes slowly closing and opening to the relaxing sound the faucet made. He breathed in, his heart beating faster as he felt Tsume's hand lifting his right thigh as he pressed against him.

Wrapping his arms around him, he bit his lip and burrowed his head into his neck. His mind and body were slowly falling away with each moment that passed, just as he had every time since he was claimed as the older wolf's mate.

…

The sound of water splashed quietly, soapy bubbles lining the rim of the filled bathtub. A wet washcloth was plunged into the water before it was brought up again, soaking and heavy. Strong hands squeezed out the excess, warm water and suds pouring down over pale skin.

A few strands of long auburn hair found themselves in the way, the boy quickly pulling his hair around to his front. It was already starting to dry after their long shower and he didn't want to get it wet again.

"Tsume…" he breathed, glancing back over his shoulder when the man's leg shifted, the water splashing a little.

The man sitting behind him didn't say anything as he continued, gently washing the boy's back and arms. He was lost in thought, finding the two of them in an all too familiar situation… Here they were, sitting in the bathtub together, just as before… Only this time, it was different.

He smiled before the boy continued, causing him to glance up, "I was thinking…" the boy paused, "Maybe we should go today? What do you think?" His questions were hesitant, his face in a frown when he still didn't receive a reply. "I know that it's been nice… But…It's just that…"

They still hadn't left town like they were supposed to… 2 days ago.

Were they crazy… for waiting around like this, just taking their time? He'd mentioned it several times now, only to be ignored… Why did he seem to be the only one that was worried? Didn't Tsume care if they were caught? And if Keith and his men were after them, why hadn't they found them yet?

"Tsume…" he muttered.

"You know, you never told me what happened to you." Tsume spoke, "After you left… A year went by as I went from place to place, trying to stay alive… But what about you, Toboe?"

Toboe frowned. Tsume was avoiding the subject again. He knew that he was worried too; he just had to be. But even so, it wasn't going to last like this forever. It was only a matter of time.

"Toboe?"

"Wha.." the boy turned his head back slightly to look at him. He examined his face, smiling slightly as he leaned back on the edge of the tub. "Where were you?" he asked again, propping up his right leg. Toboe turned his head away, frowning again as he bit his lip. "I…" he looked down. For some reason, he was finding it hard to say, where he'd been, what he'd done and seen. Why was it difficult?

It was because he was too worried to think about anything else, right?

"Toboe," the man spoke again, his tone concerned, "Is something wrong?"

The boy paused for a moment, deciding whether or not he wanted to end this moment. He'd seen a different side of Tsume the past two days. He was so gentle, so sweet, so loving. He wanted it to last longer…

"A lot happened after I left." He finally spoke up, pausing another moment before he looked back at him once more, smiling. "I found a pack."

"A pack?" Tsume was curious.

"Yes!" Toboe nodded, "A wolf pack! Like us." He turned around, scooting himself to the other end of the tub and leaning on it. Stretching his legs, he watched as his companion didn't say anything but rather looked at him curiously.

He looked down again, "I made friends, I learned a lot… what it means to be a wolf, how to be a wolf, about myself… even you."

"Even me?" the man spoke, "I'm not sure I understand."

The boy sighed, "I guess it's hard to explain… But maybe you'll meet them one day, when we find paradise?"

Tsume didn't immediately respond, looking away from him. He bit his lip, frowning as he was once again reminded of their current task. They'd been sitting too long. He was being stupid for thinking everything was all right… But… He felt safe here, he felt like he could keep the kid safe too. Out there, with the rest of the world… there was no telling what was waiting for them… not to mention who was after them.

"Want to know something interesting?" the boy's voice caused him to look up. He didn't answer and so Toboe continued, "We're all wolves. Everyone is, they just haven't awakened like we have. Do you remember when we found Cheza's flower? Well, I think it was beca-"

"Wait, hold on," Tsume interrupted, "What do you mean, everyone's a wolf? How do you know this?"

Toboe smiled, "Like I said, I learned a lot."

The man bit his lip, trying to take it all in. This was a huge fact and his mind was having trouble wrapping around it. "So if what you're saying is true, that means everyone I've ever known…" His mind was racing.

"That's right."

"But what about the humans?" he looked up.

"There are none," Toboe paused, "What I think… is that we somehow did open paradise. But something's not right. It doesn't make sense." He looked up at the man, frowning, "What happened… after I…"

Tsume bit his lip. He really didn't want to go there. Closing his eyes, he sighed before answering, "The others, me… we didn't make it. As for Kiba, I don't know." He looked up at him again, "But I can tell you one thing, this isn't paradise."

"Then what is it?"

"Hell."

The boy laughed, causing the man to growl a little. This wasn't funny. Here they were talking about death; it wasn't a joke. He didn't like it. He sighed before gripping onto each side of the tub, pulling himself up.

"Wait," Toboe stopped his laughing, "What are you-"

"The water's cold. I'm over it." Tsume mumbled, stepping out of the tub.

The boy frowned as he watched the man dry off with a towel, leaning over the edge of the tub. "It's not that cold…" He rested his chin on his arms, sighing. He had to ask again… It couldn't wait any longer. "Tsume…"

The man had just reached for the bathroom door when the boy spoke his name, "What?" he asked, not looking back.

"I was thinking… " he paused, frowning before he shot his head up, "We need to go! It's not safe here, something's not right. He should've found us by now. But if we leave soon, we-"

"I know." The man's voice answered calmly.

Toboe stopped, listening.

"I've been thinking that as well." Tsume still didn't turn to face him as he spoke, "We have enough time to get ready… before checkout today. We should probably get going sooner rather than later, don't you think?" He looked to him then and the boy smiled, "Definitely!" he nodded, happy with the response.

Tsume smiled as he watched the boy turn around to pull the tub's drain plug before rising, stepping out of the tub and grabbing a towel. As Toboe wrapped it around himself, the man opened the door, stepping back to let him through. He could tell he was happy… and anxious to go. He sighed, losing his smile. So was he.

It was several minutes later that Toboe was already dressed and ready, braiding his hair as he glanced at himself in the mirror. When Tsume hadn't followed him out of the bathroom earlier, he hadn't given it much thought, even when he heard him close the door and the sound of electric clippers buzzing. He must have been shaving. What would he look like with a beard?

The boy frowned and poked his tongue out.

He smiled when he soon heard the bathroom door opening, tying the end of his braid. He could feel his companion approaching him from behind. "I think we're ready, I packed yours too…" Toboe's voice trailed off, a frown creeping onto his face as he saw Tsume's reflection walk past in the mirror. He turned around just as the man saw his expression.

"What's that look?" the man asked, finding clean clothes and beginning to slip them on.

"What did you do?" Toboe asked.

"What?"

"Your hair… you cut it all off." The boy sounded disappointed, "Why'd you do that for?"

Tsume sat down, slipping on his boots and tying the laces. "Keith's seen me now, right? What's the point?" He stood up, zipping his pants up and pulling a long sleeved blue shirt on himself. "Besides, I hated it. Always in the way, such a pain in the ass." He rubbed his shaved head before throwing a few more things into his backpack that the boy had laid out, zipping it up and throwing it over his shoulder.

The boy looked down, frowning, "…Well, I liked it."

"Just 'cuz it gives you something to hold onto." the man smirked as he walked past him, casually smacking him on his rear end with the back of his hand.

Toboe jumped, blushing furiously as he clutched onto the bags that were in his hands. Tsume could see the boy's reflection in the mirror and it made him smile. He would never lose that innocence he loved so much about him, no matter what he did to him.

It was several minutes before the boy finally spoke up again, "You ready yet?" he asked, setting the remaining bags by the motel room's door. The man nodded from across the room, grabbing the last bag and pausing before he reached above the tallest shelf. He grabbed what lay on top, slowly approaching the boy's side. "Here," he smiled, extending his clutched hand to him with something in it.

The boy instinctively held out his hand, watching as the man let go, dropping what appeared to be a set of four silver bracelets. They made clinking noises as the boy caught them with both hands, his eyes widening as he looked down. When he realized what they were, he bit his lip and placed one hand over his mouth, looking down as he clutched the silver rings.

"You had these all along?" he choked.

Tsume frowned, unsure if he'd made a mistake. When he didn't say anything, the boy looked up, his eyes brimming with tears. "These were Gran's… how did you?" He looked down again, his mind being flooded with memories, not only from this life but the past. But it was the memories of their previous journey that made his heart the most tender, remembering the feeling of the bracelets clinking against his paw as they ran through the snow, on their journey to paradise.

"Tsume…" he looked up again, pushing up on his toes to meet the man's lips. It was soft and simple, and when he pulled away, he laughed a little, as did his companion.

…

The sound of a door being shut alerted the man out of his sleep, causing him to look up from behind the wheel of his grey vehicle. He quickly gained his senses, rubbing his eyes as he was greeted by daylight. Before him he saw the two figures across the street in front of a motel. They were carrying bags out to the parking lot and loading them into a black jeep. He frowned, watching as the younger of the two went back into the motel room, the older one walking down the sidewalk, most likely to the office.

It wasn't long before the boy reappeared, loading up two more bags before getting into the passenger's side of the jeep. The man watching him from across the way considered driving over to greet him but thought better of it. He sat quietly, trying to be patient.

He gritted his teeth when he finally saw the man heading back to the car, joining his friend. He was greeted by the boy's kiss, causing their watcher's frown to deepen.

The jeep was started and they backed out of the parking lot, heading onto the street.

The man started his car, waiting for a few other cars to pass before he too left, determined to finish what he had started. Suddenly his phone began to ring, but he let it go to voicemail. As he drove along, another minute passed before it rang again. Sighing, he decided to pick it up, reluctantly, "Yeah?" he groaned.

A second passed, "I'm still… no." He waited for a second, "Yeah, so?" he sounded agitated, "It's my business, why do you care?" Another minute or two passed by before he spoke again, this time quite angrily, "She was my fuckin' sister, you dick! What-" he growled, "Look, I don't care if yer plans are fucked! I'm the one who… That wasn't the fuckin' deal… No!" He waited another minute, "Look, you gonna kill me now? Is that what yer sayin?" Another minute, "Fine, you know what, FUCK YOU!" he clicked the phone off, throwing it onto the passenger seat with a growl.

Looking out onto the road he frowned, "Send the whole fuckin' fleet after me," he growled to himself, "See if I fucking care!"

…

The boy yawned, leaning back into the seat and resting his arms behind his head. He looked to his left, smiling when he saw two of his silver bracelets on his companion's right wrist. He could feel the other two bracelets on his own wrist and closed his eyes, content with his feelings.

"Here," he remembered his own voice saying, "Now you'll always have me." He placed two of the bracelets on his friend's wrist, then the other two on his own.

"Always have you?" the man asked curiously, "You make it sound like you're leaving me again."

"Well, you never know." The boy smiled.

"Better not." The man smiled back, pressing against him, "I'd find you."

"Really, then what?" he poked, laughing a little as he felt cornered, his companion staring down at him with those golden eyes. The man didn't answer, leaning in to kiss him but the boy moved his head to avoid it, the man's lips just grazing his cheek.

"Let's go."

The boy opened his eyes again to the sound of a lighter clicking. Glancing over, he saw his companion lighting up a cigarette. Frowning, he couldn't help but say something, "So when did you start smoking anyways?" His voice came off as annoyed.

The man didn't answer at first, and the boy spoke again, "Tsume?"

"When did you start caring?" came the snarky reply, followed by a long drag.

"It's disgusting." The boy grimaced as Tsume exhaled the smoke into the air. The boy waved a hand to clear it, curious if he'd done it on purpose. "Your mouth tastes like an ashtray." He stuck his tongue out.

"Don't kiss me then."

The reply was simple and short, causing the boy to frown. "Fine!" he snapped, turning his head to the side. He immediately regretted it too, why had he done that? Was he just looking for a fight? …Maybe it was something bigger that was bothering him…

"Tsume?" he quietly asked after a few minutes of silence.

Suddenly, the car began to pop, making jarring movements before it finally came to a slowed stop. The man managed to pull it over to the side of the road before it happened, growling as other cars passed them. The boy watched as the man's face turned and before he could say anything to him, his companion growled, "Fuck, Toboe!"

Toboe paused, frowning. Was he mad at him? Why? It wasn't his fault.

But before he could even defend himself, the man opened the door and got out, walking to the front of the jeep before popping the hood. The boy listened as he poked around, cussing to himself. But as Toboe leaned over, he noticed something along the dashboard. Rolling his eyes, he yelled out the window to his friend, "You didn't put more gas in it, it's out!"

"You think I don't know that?!" came an angry reply, followed by the slamming of the car hood.

Toboe grew angry, "Well if you remembered, we wouldn't be here!" he snapped back.

"Oh yeah?!" Tsume growled at him from outside the car. The boy's face did not change, facing him with equal anger. Another second passed before the man realized what he was doing and stepped down, his face releasing the frustration he'd pent up, "You're right…" he hesitantly and quietly replied, "I wasn't thinking and I forgot." Looking down, he walked past Toboe's door to the back of the vehicle.

It was midday and the sun was bright, but the fall was here now and it wasn't that hot. The boy listened as the sound of the back door rose, frowning at the man's sudden change of attitude. He was stressed too, he could feel it. And what's more, he felt guilty for egging him on like he had, out of his own frustration. "Tsume…" He wanted to apologize.

Toboe got out of the car, walking back to him and speaking his name one more time, "Tsume…"

The man paused, not looking up as he stopped sorting through their belongings. "What?" he asked.

"Do you think he's after us?"

A minute passed before a reply finally came, the silence deaf between them. "I don't know, Toboe."

"What if he finds us?"

"I don't know."

Toboe didn't ask again, only standing there as Tsume continued his task at hand. He watched, frowning as the man began emptying bags, throwing items into larger ones and setting them outside the vehicle. The boy became confused, "What are you doing?" he asked curiously.

"What's it look like? We're walking."

"Walking?" the boy frowned, "We can't go that far! It's-"

The man stood up straight, "There was a town about one hour back. We need fuel for the jeep, so if we walk back-"

"And what about Keith?"

The man frowned again.

"How long would it take to walk though? Can we afford to go back? If he's after us…" No answer came, "Tsume!"

The boy watched as the placed his hand against the rear of the car, leaning on it as he looked down, sighing instead of answering him. He appeared to be thinking up some sort of plan. The boy sighed as well, casting his glance around the forest that surrounded them. The pine trees were tall and thick, the land so dense that you could hardly see past anything. Even the road disappeared as it stretched around the corner a couple of miles in the distance.

It appeared they were in the middle of nowhere. There were no cars to be heard, nor had he seen any in a while… nothing…

They were alone out here.

When his stomach growled, he moaned a little. "Do we have anything to eat back there?"

"Did you pack anything?"

"No."

"Then no."

Toboe frowned, looking down. He didn't want to get angry but he was a little bit frustrated.

"Do you even know where we're going?" Tsume asked after a minute passed.

"Yes." The boy bit his lip.

The man caught the kid's expression, "Look… I'm not mad. But I've been driving us wherever you tell me. How do you know it's the right way?"

"I just know."

"How?"

"I just do."

Tsume sighed. Silence assumed, but he finally spoke up to fill it. "I'm hungry too… Maybe we should go back?"

"No. There's no going back. Only forward."

The man glanced up, seeing a red wolf now in front of him. "I can fix this," it spoke, "Stay here, I'll be back!" With that, he took off and headed into the woods.

"Toboe, wait!" Tsume called after him. He growled when he was ignored. "Dammit!" he cursed.

Damn kid, what was he thinking?! He quickly grabbed two of their bags and slammed the back hood shut, dashing after the wolf through the dense forest.

He dodged through the tall pines, sticks cracking and leaves crunching beneath him. The colors of fall were all around him as it had just barely set in, in the past couple of weeks. Oranges, reds, yellows and golds blurred past him as he ran. It was then that he caught sight of the red wolf ahead of him. He could hardly make a difference between him and the ground covered in autumn debris.

"Toboe!" he called after him. How long had he been running? He stopped, his breathing heavy and his chest burning. A minute passed before he looked up, the sound of a figure stepping over to him.

"Tsume," the red wolf spoke in a hushed voice, "Why didn't you wait?"

"I'm not leaving you alone!" he growled suddenly, stepping back.

The wolf before him seemed to smile, slowly turning around and walking away. "Fine, but be quiet. Can you turn?"

"What?" Tsume asked quietly, walking alongside him.

"Your wolf form. You're too obvious as you are."

"I can't." The man answered angrily.

"Yes you can, it's easy. Just let out your emotions, it will find you." Tsume didn't answer him. The wolf continued on his way, stopping every now and then, pricking up his ears and sniffing around occasionally. "This way," he whispered, turning past a large fallen tree trunk.

"What are you doing?"

"Hunting."

Tsume was about to say something but he was interrupted before he could do so, "Stop." Toboe halted in front of him, his ears going back. "I think I recognize this area…" He looked around curiously, but didn't move, "There's a scent nearby…"

"I can smell it too." The man spoke, bringing himself down to the ground instinctively. It was a metallic scent accompanied by the smell of meat. Toboe started to move again, and so the man stood once more, following after him. It wasn't too long before they came across the source of the smell. It was a deer carcass, partially ripped open on the floor of the forest. It looked pretty fresh too.

"This isn't good. We need to go around." The wolf spoke, stepping back.

Tsume was confused, "Why?"

"It's someone else's kill."

"I'm guessing you learned how to hunt from those wolves you lived with, right?" The man asked, leaning down to the ground. He pulled one of the bags from his shoulder, beginning to open it.

"Yes, but-" Toboe answered, wanting to continue but was interrupted.

"Well, I'm assuming you can gut, strip and fix this up, right? I can get a fire going-"

The wolf growled, growing impatient, "Listen to me, whoever did this is gonna come back. We need to go!"

The man continued, "The work's already done for us. Nothing's gonna-"

"Don't be stupid, Tsume!"

Tsume seemed to growl back at him, "Listen, runt! Quit being so damned stubborn! …I'm tired and hungry," He grumbled, turning around and ignoring him as he began to pull a knife out of his bag as well as a few other things. "Besides, we won't fix it here where we found it. I'll drag it else where."

"It doesn't make any difference." Toboe persisted, but his companion didn't even answer. "Tsume?" He growled when there still wasn't a reply.

The red wolf just stood behind him, snarling. He was mad and even wanted to bite him. Why wasn't he listening to him? Didn't he trust him? He knew what he was doing! It was Tsume who was really being stubborn!

Toboe snorted, shaking his head at all of the man's nonsense. He walked past Tsume and the deer carcass, heading in another direction. The man looked up, frowning. "Where are you going?" he asked, "I don't know how to prepare this thing!"

"Figure it out. I'm not getting killed on account of you." The wolf replied, not turning back.

The man didn't answer him, just furrowed his brow as he looked down at the dead animal. He was so used to city living… He knew how to start a fire, sure… But this wasn't hot dogs. Biting his lip, he dug into the animal with his knife, latching on with his hand and pulling back the skin. It came off quite easily actually and he continued. It wasn't that hard.

Time passed and it had been a long time since Tsume had heard Toboe's footsteps. He was probably a ways off, finding himself a rabbit or squirrel. He'd managed to figure it mostly out, even draining blood and finding the best cuts. He was thankful for the few television shows he'd seen even that helped him with this, the hunting and survival ones. As ridiculous as they seemed, just nonsense blaring on the tv to fill the silence in his old apartment had actually worked out.

He also now had a far prepared with a few strips of meat hanging over a homemade spit made from sticks. Standing up, he grinned, feeling quite proud of himself. He sighed, glancing around and wishing Toboe could see this. How long had it been? At least an hour most likely... surely the kid would be heading back by now, maybe even have something to add to the fire.

It was then that he heard a few branches cracking on the forest floor from not far away. Turning around, he called out, "Toboe!" No answer, "Come see what I've done!" When no answer came once again he just figured the pup was still mad at him for not listening. Oh well, he'd get over it. He leaned over to stir the fire, making sure the flames wouldn't go out.

The sound of leaves crunching nearby caused him to turn around, expecting to see a red wolf. But instead, his eyes widened as he was greeted by the blurred image of dark hair and teeth lunging at him accompanied by the sound of a loud roar.

…

From a far distance, the red wolf finally had something in his sights. He stood quietly, wishing the members of his pack were here to help him. It would be easier, but he could do it now. He had before. Then he'd find Tsume. He was sure he was having trouble, but it was his fault… Should he have left him?

He lowered his ears, thinking of his friend. He did feel a little guilty… But Tsume was the type who had to learn the hard way... And he could manage himself, couldn't he?

Ignoring the impulse to head back, he moved a step forward, watching closely as the deer grazed ahead of him. Suddenly, a loud roar echoed from far off, causing the deer to jot its head up and immediately darting away from fright.

The wolf's eyes widened. He knew all too well what had happened. He bit his lip and ran back in the direction he had come, already regretting his decision. Dammit… Why did Tsume have to have everything his way?!

Was he ever going to stop treating him like a child?

…

A grey car pulled to the left side of the road, driving up behind a parked black jeep. The sound of the breaks squeaked slightly as it came to a slow stop, the sound of the engine being turned off after a minute or two. The driver's door was slowly opened, a man with dark hair and clothes stepping out.

As he looked ahead to the jeep, he knew he was right. They weren't there.

The man closed the door behind him, right after grabbing his leather satchel and throwing it across his left shoulder. He walked up to the abandoned vehicle, noticing what sky he could see overhead through the thick, tall trees. It was beginning to grow dark, late in the afternoon. The sun would be setting soon.

Where were they?

…

The silver haired man bit his lip as he felt blood slowly trickling down his right arm. He had just barely dodged the jaws of the large brown beast but the thing had still clipped him as he lunged past him. Ignoring the pain, he was still on the ground when he looked back, recognizing what the animal was. It was a bear, and a large one at that.

No doubt that deer had belonged to him. But it didn't matter; he knew he could take him. The man leaned forward, quickly reaching into his open bag to find what he needed. The bear slowly turned around and he searched more frantically, beginning to panic as he couldn't find it.

Where was his gun?!

A low growl bellowed from the beast in front of him. He wanted to pick up and run, but he knew he could end this once he found the gun. Then he could-there! He got it!

Immediately finding his footing, he quickly aimed the gun at the animal who now had now brought himself up on two feet. He towered over the man, his yellow eyes glaring and drooling teeth bared. The man growled himself, firing the gun directly at him. When he missed the bear swung at him and he quickly stepped back, tripping over a log as the gun was knocked out of his hand.

"Son of a bitch!" he swore, just as the beast lunged at him once more.

It was in that moment that a blurred image of red fur flew out of nowhere, latching onto the bear's head. The animal roared out in pain and stumbled backwards, the man now seeing what had happened. It was Toboe, he'd come back for him!

…

The dark haired man shot his head to the left when he heard the gunshots go off in the distance. He bit his lip, taking off in that direction as he too pulled out his gun. He had no idea what was going on as the trees blurred past him. All he knew was that he wanted to end everything, no more running.

…

It was like the walrus all over again.

The red wolf held on tightly to the beast's cheekbone and left eye, feeling his teeth sinking into its skull. It roared painfully, stumbling backwards as it swatted at him. He growled himself when he felt the bear roughly backing up into a tree and he lost his grip. He fell to the ground with a thud, almost immediately seeing a huge foot above his head.

Jumping out of the way just in time, he watched as the bear stumbled forward, its paws rubbing against its face. The red wolf waited, wanting to glance back to see if his friend was all right but he knew he couldn't. Mere seconds passed before the bear grumbled and snorted, regaining its foot as it slowly looked up. He snarled viciously, breathing heavily when he caught sight of the wolf in front of him.

The red wolf noticed its left eye, swollen shut already with patches of flesh just hanging as blood trickled down. He made his stance, just waiting for the animal to charge at him. Suddenly the bear was distracted by the sound of leaves rustling and glanced past his opponent, seeing the man searching for something. He dropped down to all four feet and started moving in that direction.

The wolf wouldn't allow it. "Tsume, run!" he yelled, jumping between the two of them.

His teeth were bared and his hackles rose as he dared the larger animal to make a move. The bear ignored him and so he lunged at him, latching onto its snout this time. The animal roared and tossed its head, the wolf letting go and landing a few feet away from the impact. He didn't take any time before he lunged once more, only to come face first into the bear's swinging arm.

The red wolf yelped as he was thrown into a nearby tree, his eyes widening at the pain hitting his back. "Toboe!" he heard his name being called by his companion when he landed on the ground. He didn't waste any time and tried to get up, but he was having trouble. He winced in pain, falling back to the ground.

The bear was above him now, "Tsume…" he whined, trying to move away. But it was too late; the bear swung at him once more, sending him flying across the forest floor. He cried out when his body hit the ground, forcefully rolling through broken tree branches and rocks that cut into him. When he came to a stop he didn't look up as he heard the sounds of the bear breathing heavily, grunting and growling with each step it made to him.

Toboe wouldn't give up though as he slowly and painfully propped himself up on one arm. The bear was getting closer now and he began to wonder where Tsume was, if he'd gotten away. As he wearily looked up, he saw the beast now standing above him on two legs. He winced when it swung an arm up, preparing for another blow.

Tsume hadn't left, he'd been searching for his gun but couldn't find it anywhere among the mess of leaves. He was going to have to… no, he couldn't do it. He'd already tried… But right now… He looked up when he heard Toboe yelp, the sound of him crashing against a tree. "Toboe!" he called out.

Dammit, why now?!

Why was it so easy before? It just happened… but he couldn't do it.

He watched as his friend was hit once again, thrown across the ground. It made him wince. It made him angry. He closed his eyes, tightly clutching the bleeding wound on his right arm. Something inside of him then twitched, his golden eyes becoming infuriated at the thought of his mate dying to a stupid wild animal…

The red wolf looked up at the bear's arm, just waiting for it to sending him flying. But just when he thought it was over he saw a silver wolf running towards them. It lunged from behind the bear, its teeth latching onto the large animal's hairy back. It roared out in pain once more, throwing its head up.

Toboe took the moment to move out of the beast's path, slowly but surely.

He looked back as it stumbled about with the silver wolf clinging to him. The animal tried to get him off, swinging back and forth, but it couldn't. It threw itself into trees, even pressing Tsume into one, but still he wouldn't let go. The bear was growing tired and even more angry.

It was then that a gunshot was fired from behind them and the bear slowed its movements. Tsume let go, jumping away from the beast and landing on the ground. He was out of breath it seemed, but still would not letting his guard drop. Toboe jerked his head around at the sound, his heart beating faster for a reason he did not know. His eyes widened and his ears lowered.

It was Keith.

"What the fuck is this?" the dark haired man stammered. He had his arm raised out in front of him with a gun in hand, not aimed in any particular direction. He then remembered what he had seen that day, the two wolves.

It was them.

Keith quickly pointed his gun at the silver wolf, "You!" he growled.

"NO!" Toboe cried out.

Suddenly a loud roared emerged out of the bear and the man looked up just as it lunged at him, knocking him to the ground. He screamed out in horror and pain as he felt his bones being crushed beneath the weight of the beast. He threw his arms up to cover his face, trying to protect himself. He could already taste blood in his mouth.

The red wolf's eyes widened at the sight of Keith being attacked, his heart seeming to stop. He quickly looked back at the silver wolf, who was just standing there. "Ts-tsume…" he stuttered amidst the cries of the man beneath the bear.

Tsume looked ahead to Toboe. He knew what the kid was thinking. He growled, "Dammit!" And with that, he took off towards the bear. But before he could lunge at the beast, he saw two blurred images run past him.

Immediately stopping in his tracks, he looked up as he saw a black animal lunge at the bear and latch onto its face. That one was followed by a brown one lunging onto the giant beast's back and grab hold of it. He knew what they were.

Wolves.

And suddenly, there seemed to be many of them all at once come down upon them. The silver wolf instinctively ran to his injured mate's side, standing above him with his teeth bared. He had no idea what was going on.

The bear was off the man now, who just lay there whimpering. Two wolves stood next to him as the other two drew off the bear. Each of them had let go of the beast by now and there were at least four others who had circled it.

The huge animal roared, backing up as another wolf bit at its heels. It stumbled forward, crying out as yet another wolf lunged at his face. It just barely dodged the attack and paused, making grunting sounds as it looked back and forth. It seemed to be measuring its odds. There were at least six of them right upon him with the others looming closer, just readying for another attack as they snarled.

Toboe watched from underneath Tsume as the bear turned and ran, a couple of the wolves nipping at his heels as he went. He glanced back to where Keith had been attacked. He could hardly see his body above the grasses, not making a sound as two wolves stood above him. Was he dead?

Suddenly a familiar scent filled his nostrils and he glanced to his left, seeing a black wolf slowly approaching them. He heard Tsume growl above him, but as he came closer he knew who it was.

"Sera?" Toboe asked.

The black wolf stopped, a few feet away from them. "Call off your boyfriend," he smirked, "I won't bite."

* * *

><p>:D Thoughts?<p> 


	27. Chapter 27

Yaya, that didn't take long huh? Now I will apologize, but there will be some dirty things in this chapter, you have been warned. ^^ We're nearing a head, I'll let you know. It's all down hill from here with where I'm going… Maybe only a couple chapters after this… if that. Maybe only one? We'll see… For now, enjoy as always!

FYI: If you prefer the "uncut" version, please visit adultfanfiction dot net or deviant art.

Caution: Further chapters will contain mature content such as language and yaoi, Tsume/Toboe. Be forewarned.

Disclaimer: I do not own the characters or series of Wolf's Rain. They belong to BONES & Keiko Nobumoto. This story is non-profit for my own and others' enjoyment. Thank you. :)

**They Already Knew**

"Is it bad?" the silver haired man asked.

"It hurts, but I think I'm okay." The auburn haired boy answered, propping himself up on one arm. He winced when he did so, clutching his side.

"Can you walk?" an older boy with black hair asked, stepping up to him.

"Yeah," he replied, sitting up. But when he did so he immediately lost his balance, letting out a grunt, "Shit," he cursed.

The black haired one laughed a little, "Oh come on now, I know how tough you are," he smirked, "Get up."

"Toboe, don't." the silver haired man spoke up, stopping him from doing anything. "You're injured." He turned to the black haired boy, "Sera, right? Is there anyone who can take a look? Something could be broken." He leaned down next to Toboe on the ground. "How bad is it?" he asked him.

"Tsume, I'm fine." He answered, glancing up at him. "I'm just sore. It's mostly cuts and bruises." He brushed himself off of dirt and debris, wincing again when he went over his wounds.

"This is my fault." Came the man's angry reply.

For some reason Toboe didn't interject that time, leaving the subject hanging on. He frowned before looking up to Sera, who was looking over his shoulder. He followed his gaze to the other members of the pack who had also turned to their human forms. He further noticed it was mostly the males from the pack, the hunting party most likely… but no Turek.

Toboe was about to say something but was interrupted by Sera, who turned back to face him, "He's right you know. Someone should look at you. But not here."

The boy was curious, "Sera, what's going on? What are you guys doing out here?" he asked.

The black haired boy smiled, "I should ask you the same thing. Just waltzing back in like nothing ever happened… Miri will be happy."

Toboe couldn't help but frown; what was with the attitude? The last time they'd spoken it was much more, what was the word? Threatening? Aggressive? …Sera wasn't acting like Sera. Yes he was still being the usual smart ass but with less... wanting to kill him. It was odd.

"You," Sera turned to Tsume, "Take him and follow us back to the village."

Tsume nodded and Toboe's eyes widened, "The village?" He waited for a second, "I knew this place looked familiar, wait…" He began to think… How long had they been driving now? They should have been much farther… the time didn't add up. No… What route had they taken?

"Yeah, not too far from here." Sera nodded, "Back to the old stomping grounds, right?"

Toboe felt like an idiot. They hadn't made any progress since the day he found Tsume while wandering in the desert. They'd taken a different road sure, but he didn't expect to have only gone this far… It was all that time they spent at the hotel too though… They'd wasted so much time. How long would it be before they found paradise now?

It seemed like this was just yet another detour… but Miri

He looked up when he saw Tsume lean over, reaching around him. "Here, hang on." He told him. Toboe responded quickly, wrapping his arms around his friend who now stood up, holding him in his arms. When he turned around he saw that the others were beginning to gather, one of the taller men carrying Keith over his shoulder. He'd completely forgotten!

"Is he ok?" he asked, catching a sigh from Tsume. He looked up at the man's frown but glanced back to Sera when he answered.

"He's alive… for now." He shrugged, "Friend of yours?"

Toboe looked down before Tsume spoke up, "No." he answered plainly.

"Should we leave him then? …He is a mess." Sera replied.

"No," the auburn haired boy spoke up, feeling Tsume's hands clutch tighter around him. He frowned, looking down, "We can't… We have to help him."

"Well all right then," Sera turned to the one carrying Keith's unconscious body, "Hurry and get him back to Gran! Go, now!" No sooner that he spoke the command the taller man became a wolf, the man still on his back as he took off, accompanied by two other wolves. The black haired man then turned to them, "Come on then."

…

The silver wolf moved carefully with the red wolf sprawled out on his back. He glanced out the corner of his eye to see the younger one's head drooping from his shoulder. Looking forward, he frowned as he watched the rest of the pack run around him. One of the wolves far ahead of them had the dark haired man on its back, making him want to growl.

This man had tried to kill them. Why on earth did Toboe think it was a good idea to let him live? And further more, why hadn't he protested? Was it because he felt guilty for the bear incident? …That must have been it.

But it was his fault. Once again he had let the kid get hurt.

"We're almost there," he heard Toboe speak.

He looked ahead, the trees growing thinner. What had he gotten himself into? He felt odd and out of place. This wasn't his pack and really… it wasn't Toboe's pack either. He'd been lying to himself, thinking it was all right with just the two of them. No. Without Kiba or Hige, even Blue… It just didn't make sense.

The red wolf looked ahead, holding on tightly with his paws as he began to see the clearing coming up. He smiled; he had been thinking of Miri again. Would she be surprised? How much had changed since he'd seen her? Maybe the time he and Tsume had wasted wasn't a loss after all. She wanted to go to paradise before… maybe this was a second chance? For all of them…

…

"Toboe!" the blonde girl exclaimed happily. The boy smiled when he saw her immediately recognize him. He held onto Tsume, all of them having taken human form once more. As she came closer, he noticed her hair was a little longer. And there was something else… something different that he couldn't quite put his finger on.

She placed her hands around his neck and pressed their foreheads together. "You came back," she whispered, "I knew you would come back." She smiled, as did Toboe.

From above, the silver haired man looked down at their exchange, a frown creeping onto his face.

"Gran!" Miri finally noticed the blood on her friend and shot her head up, "Gran!" she turned her head and called out. The old woman had already been shortly behind her, among other pack members. They had come out to greet the newcomers along with the hunting party that had returned.

"Yes, yes," she grumbled as she stepped over to them, "Set him down," she commanded and Tsume did as he was told, gently placing the boy on the ground. The woman began feeling Toboe's arms, then his back, spine, chest and stomach, even his legs. When she was finished she stood up, "You're all right. Have someone help you clean up. Just rest for the next few days and don't move much. Should be fine." She waved her hand to excuse him.

The silver haired man nodded, relief filling his face.

A young woman ran up to her then, "There's the other too, ma'am…"

"What other?"

"The man that was with them," she looked back over her shoulder to the tall man that approached them, still carrying the unconscious man over his shoulder. Gran glanced him over quickly before her eyes widened, "Quickly!" she growled, "Bring him to my house!" The tall man nodded and took off into the village as she hurried behind him.

"Wait!" Toboe called after her, "Will he be all right?!"

The old woman didn't stop to turn around, "We'll see!" she called back.

Tsume bit his lip, "Toboe…" he muttered, leaning over to speak to him but was ignored when Miri spoke up in his place, "I really can't believe you're back." She smiled, sitting next to him on the ground. The other pack members had begun to disperse by now, going off to their own daily tasks. It was just Toboe, Tsume, Miri and Sera now.

"Your hair is still long I see," she rang her fingers through a few strand.

"Oh, it's a mess, stop." Toboe blushed, batting her away. He smoothed it down, trying to get out a few leaves and twigs that were still stuck in from the bouts of the bear attack. The girl laughed a little. "So why did you come back? Do you find it?" she asked.

Toboe knew what she was talking about, "No… not yet." he looked down, "We got a little sidetracked."

"Sidetracked?"

"It's a long story." He shrugged, placing a hand behind his head. Miri then looked up at the man who stood above him, still smiling. "So is this your friend?"

Tsume bit his lip just as Toboe blushed, "Uh, yeah…" he muttered, feeling embarrassed and put on the spot. The girl stood up, "I'm Miri! I've heard so much about you!" she smiled, reaching out to shake his hand.

Tsume didn't return the kind gesture. "Funny, I haven't heard anything about you." He replied coldly.

Toboe looked up in that instant, catching his companion's cold expression. He bit his lip, confused and all together worried about their exchange.

"Oh, well that's all right…" Miri replied hesitantly, "So how long will you two be staying?"

"As long as it takes for him to heal, then we go."

The girl couldn't help but frown at Tsume's cold demeanor, "Well all right then. Sera," she turned to the black haired man, "Can you take him to Kalev's house? They can stay there until Toboe's better."

Toboe's eyes widened, remembering his kind mentor, the one who had showed him everything he knew about being a wolf. "But what about Kalev?" he looked up to Miri.

She smiled, "No worries, he's been staying with Gran since he's been ill."

"Ill?" Toboe asked, worried.

"We'll talk more at my house." She turned back to Sera, "Take his friend, what's it?"

"Tsume," Toboe answered her when Tsume did not.

"Tsume," she continued, "Show him around, Sera. I'm going to help Toboe get cleaned up." She bent over next to the auburn haired boy, "Here," she said, wrapping an arm around his side. The boy nodded, latching onto her as he was pulled up.

"Can you walk with my help?" she asked.

"Yeah," he nodded, holding onto her for support. He glanced up at Tsume who was watching him, a frown on his face. Before he could say anything, Sera spoke up, "C'mon." he turned and began walking in the opposite direction. Tsume reluctantly turned to follow, casting one last angry glance at Toboe who was just plain confused. But instead of worrying about it, he turned when Miri did so.

It wasn't long before they'd made it to a small house within village. It was getting darker and the sun had almost set completely. As she led him into the house, Toboe glanced around. The house was plain inside, with few furnishings aside from a small sofa and coffee table, no table in the kitchen or chairs. There was only one lamp in the room, next to the sofa, which Miri went to and turned on.

"Sit, please." She asked, then turning into the kitchen.

The boy nodded and slowly limped his way to the sofa, taking a seat. He made himself comfortable, watching as the girl moved around in the kitchen. She was filling a teapot with water, then sitting it on the stove to heat up. "It'll take just a minute," she spoke up.

Toboe glanced around once more, curiously. He was about to ask but no sooner had she already brought out hot water and a cloth to him, along with a small box. She sat by his side, "Let's see now," she gestured to him in an upward motion.

When he didn't answer, she spoke again, "Your shirt, take it off so I can see the damage."

"Oh," he blushed, "What about Gran?"

Miri glared at him, "She's busy, remember?"

Toboe thought of Keith and nodded, "Oh, yes…"

"Look, we can do this the hard way if you want? I'm perfectly capable, Toboe."

"I wasn't say that you weren't capa-"

"Then off with it!" she commanded.

"Fine!" he rudely responded, pulling his torn shirt off. He watched as she gave him a quick once over before commenting, "It's not that bad. But your arm, that cut will need to be sewn up."

"Sewn up?!" Toboe gawked, feeling a bit worried.

"Yes," she answered plainly, reaching for the box on the coffee table, "You're not afraid, are you?" She glanced at him from the corner of her eye and he frowned, "No! Of course not." He answered.

Miri couldn't help but smile as she laid out a large needle and thick string from the box. She followed the task by pouring hot water from the kettle into a small bowl. Placing a towel in and soaking up the water, she squeezed it out before placing it on Toboe's upper arm. He held still and did not wince, even though he wanted to.

"You're lucky." She commented as she poured a little bit of whiskey onto another cloth before sanitizing the wound. He did wince that time, biting his lip. She continued, "I heard you went off against a bear?" She then took that moment to begin stitching him up, already having threaded the needle.

"Ah," he whined a little, "I suppose I did…"

"You got some balls."

"Yeah, that was fun…"

Miri smiled, "That Tsume guy, he's fun too right?"

Toboe remembered the last he saw him, the expression he gave him, like he was mad at him or something. "Yeah, he's fun all right."

Miri glanced up for just a second before continuing, "Trouble in paradise?"

"Mmm," Toboe whined a little more, "He's just difficult at times… I think it's because he's older, that he doesn't listen to me." He bit his lip, "The whole bear thing… It wouldn't have even happened in the first place if he hadn't been so stupid."

"He seems like he would be."

"Hey," He looked at her, frowning.

"What? You said it." She laughed a little. He couldn't help but laugh as well.

It wasn't long before she was finished, "There," she spoke before grabbing the bandage wraps she'd already laid out. She began tying them around the finished area. Toboe took that moment to ask, "So, you never told me about Kalev?"

"Oh, yes…" Miri frowned, "It's just that… He's getting older, Toboe. You know that." She sat back after she tied the bandage. She placed the cloth back into the bowel of hot water, soaking it again before placing it on Toboe once more. She began to clean the rest of his wounds, the cuts and scrapes that weren't that bad.

"A while back, shortly after you left… He had a pretty bad fall in his house when he first began getting sick. It wasn't until the next day that my father found him. He's been staying with my Gran since, just to be safe…" she frowned.

Toboe looked down. He could remember Kalev's words, telling him that he wasn't long for this world. But he didn't want to see it happen…

"Turek, I mean, your father," he spoke as he looked up again, "Why wasn't he with the hunting party today?"

Miri paused, pulling the warm wet cloth away for a second before she continued with a sigh, "It's my mother…"

"Your mother?"

"Today is the anniversary of her death. I never see him on days like this. He shuts himself inside and refuses to see anyone…"

"Miri, I'm sorry-"

"Don't be." She interrupted him, quickly turning her face into a smile, "It's all right."

Toboe didn't respond after that. He didn't know how to, watching Miri smiling like that. She was always hiding something underneath… fear, sadness, anger… even a small glimmer of hope. "Miri," the boy spoke up after a minute of silence, "What's wrong with Sera?"

Miri laughed, tying the last stich in his arm. He winced when she did so, but watched as she continued smiling, "So curious! …So what do you mean?" she asked.

"He's acting… I dunno, weird."

"How so?" she began attending the last bloody patch on him. He didn't move as she did so, just answered, "Well for one, he's not trying to kill me like the last time I saw him…"

Miri nodded, "Things have changed a lot, Toboe."

"How such?"

She sat back, finished cleaning his wounds, "Did you even stop to wonder why I wasn't living with my Gran anymore?"

Toboe looked at her curiously, "I did wonder about this house-"

"Sera and I…" she looked down, still smiling, "We're together now."

"Oh…" Toboe didn't sound upset, so she continued, "He's changed, Toboe. He really has."

"Well…" the boy seemed to force a smile, "That's really great, Miri. I'm happy for you guys!"

She nudged him in the leg, "Oh, quit it!" she growled with a laugh, "I know how you hated each other!"

"I don't hate him! I never did… He started it, not me." Toboe insisted.

Miri rolled her eyes, "Ok, sure. Well anyways… I'm just glad you're back. I really missed you… Oh!" She got up then, running into back room. She handed him a brown long sleeved shirt, "Here, and there's some other things too." She immediately went to the kitchen and opened up the fridge as Toboe slipped the shirt on. He watched as she began pulling out a few things just before the front door opened. It was Sera.

"Everything ok in here?" he asked Miri, who was now filling a small bag.

"Yes," she answered, "I know it's getting late."

"Yeah, I'm gonna take a shower." He replied, waving to Toboe as he walked past. "You ok now?"

"Y-yes," he hesitantly replied, "Miri fixed me up. All better." He didn't really know what else to say.

"Good," and with that, Sera disappeared down the hallway, closing one of the doors behind him. Toboe listened as the shower was obviously turned on. He shook his head, "I'll never get over it."

Miri just laughed as she walked up to him, handing him a bag filled with things. "What's this?" the boy asked, taking it from her.

"Food and a few other things, like soap and stuff." She nodded, smiling, "It should tide you over for the time being, until you take off again…" she looked down, "Toboe…"

"Hmm?" he was sorting through the bag, his stomach already rumbling. He'd forgotten how hungry he'd been all day, with everything that had happened.

Miri never replied and so he looked up, but she'd already walked back into the kitchen. He couldn't see her face, but there was something different about her, he knew that much…

"Well, it is getting late. I'm sure your mate is worried about you too." She spoke.

Toboe stood up, wincing a bit. But it wasn't as bad as before; the pain was already beginning to subside. "There's some medicine in the bag too, if it still hurts." Miri told him when she noticed he was still having a bit of trouble getting around. He thanked her, walking to the door and opening it. He bit his lip, not believing how cold it was already. Winter would be upon them soon enough.

"Miri," he said, turning back around, "I hope you're ok, with everything."

"I am," she nodded, "Don't worry about me, Toboe. You just take care of yourself." She glanced outside then back to him, "Do you remember where Kalev's house is?"

"Yes," he replied, "And thanks again. I'm sure I'll see you in the morning." He stepped outside, holding the bag.

"I'm sure you will. Do you need help?"

"I'll be fine. Goodnight."

"Goodnight, Toboe."

The boy watched as she softly closed the door, and he himself turned to go, frowning a bit. He really did hope she was all right. He remembered her not wanting this life before… had she simply given in? Or had she changed her mind?

It wasn't long before he'd made it to Kalev's old house, noticing the light on inside. Tsume was in there waiting for him. He could feel his insides churning, and it wasn't just because he was hungry. He still couldn't get over the look he had given him earlier.

Opening the door, he saw that everything was the same as when he'd seen it before, aside from his friend who was sitting on the sofa. He was tending to his own wound, wrapping it up just as his was. Closing the door behind him, he decided to say something.

"I'm back!"

"I noticed."

Toboe decided to ignore the cold reply, "Miri gave me a few things." He went to the kitchen table, beginning to pull everything out. "There's food in here too. Are you hungry?" He pulled out a loaf of bread and some cheese, turning to face him.

The boy frowned when he didn't receive an answer, "What's wrong?" Tsume wouldn't look at him, "Look, if you think I'm mad at you, I'm not." He looked down, "Sure it was a bit frustrating, but-"

"It's not that."

Toboe looked up as Tsume continued, "You have every right to be mad at me. What I did was really stupid." The boy couldn't help but smile when he realized that his friend was apologizing to him. But then he frowned, knowing there was still something eating at the man in front of him. "Then, what is it?" he asked, "You can tell me…"

Tsume leaned on his knees, clasping his hands and sighing, "Do you really want to talk?"

"Yes." Toboe nodded persistently.

"Fine," he paused for a minute before looking up at him, not sure how to say it. Honestly he just wanted to forget about it and go to bed. But he knew the runt wouldn't give up until he spat it out. "What's with that girl?" he asked plainly.

"What, Miri?"

"Yes, Miri." He growled. Of course the kid knew who he was talking about. He watched as Toboe sat for a second, not saying anything until a light seemed to go off in his eyes. "Tsume, are you jealous?" He sounded excited, a small smile creeping onto his face. Even the way he said it made the older wolf a little angry. "No."

"Yes, you are." The boy smiled, leaning on the kitchen counter behind him.

"No I'm not…" Tsume sighed, looking away impatiently. Was he?

Toboe stopped then, afraid that his teasing would only make it worse. "So is that why you were mean to her?"

"I wasn't mean to her."

"Yes, you were!" he frowned, "It was nice of them to give us a place to stay, not to mention save our lives! You could've at least smiled or something…" He bit his lip as he watched Tsume across the room, who now stood up from the sofa. He walked to the kitchen where he was, opening the fridge. "No beer…"

"Tsume…" Toboe scowled. He was avoiding the subject; he knew it. But just as he was about to press him further, the man slowly turned to him and stood up, closing the fridge door behind him. As he stood near him he couldn't see his features very well, his back turned to the only light.

"You know, I was going to drop it… But since you're the one who wants to bring it up…" Tsume spoke annoyingly, leaning on the fridge. The boy watched him curiously with a frown, "What are you even talking about?" he asked angrily.

"You remember that day in the desert?" Tsume asked.

"Yes…" Toboe replied hesitantly.

"When I found," he looked down, "I could smell someone else on you…"

Toboe's heart seemed to stop all together. His mind flashed to that day, throwing himself into his mate's arms, kissing him. But then his mind went to Miri, the day he left… sitting with her on the top of that canyon, the kiss they shared. "Wait-"

"I didn't think about it until I saw her. That girl's scent…" he looked up at him, his golden eyes glowing, "You were covered in her scent that day. Your clothes, your hair, everything…"

"Tsume, it's not like that…" the boy reached out to him and then pulled it back, rethinking the decision to do so. Looking down, he bit his lip. "Look, we were together all the time. We were friends," he looked up at him then, "You're overthinking it, Tsume." He sounded persistent yet worried.

"Then who was it I tasted on your lips?" the man growled.

Toboe stepped back, the small of his back hitting the counter top's edge. He looked back, wincing slightly from the hard bump. "Toboe," he looked back when his name was called. "What?" he asked, his face confused. He was speechless, caught off guard like this.

"Were you two together?"

"No! It's not like that!" he insisted.

Tsume moved then, inching closer to him, "Then tell me!"

What was Toboe supposed to say? That they tried out a kiss to see if it worked? It could've developed into something more, yes… But it didn't. Wait… The boy frowned. He and Tsume weren't even together at the time. He didn't have anything to feel guilty for.

Toboe stepped forward, holding his ground, "It wasn't anything! We kissed, so what?!" he growled, "And don't worry! She's with Sera now, for good!" He paused, biting his lip before continuing, "Why am I even answering to you?! I don't have to! You don't own me!"

"Then what's that?!" Tsume shot back at him, flicking the shirt back on the boy's collar, revealing a small scar. The boy grabbed it, covering it up. That was the mark Tsume had given him their first night together. He knew he'd given Tsume one too.

Toboe stepped forward, getting right in Tsume's face. He was determined to not back down and he knew something that he could throw at him, "You sure talk a big talk! What's your excuse?!"

Tsume stepped back an inch, "What?" he seethed.

"That night, the night you came home in the dark, covered in blood and angry… You know, when you…" he lost the intensity in his voice when his mind began reverting to the way Tsume had hurt him… But shaking his head, he regained his ground, "I could smell a woman's perfume on you! What was that, huh?!"

Tsume stepped back, hitting the edge of the table and slowly sitting down. His eyes slowly began to widen as he recalled everything that had happened that night. It was so long ago… He frowned, turning his head away from him. He didn't want to remember that.

"Answer me!"

"Toboe, stop it," he was still angry, but had lost the momentum. The kid had the upper hand now. "It wasn't like that. You don't understand…"

"How am I supposed to understand?!" he was beginning to get tears in his eyes, the events from that night running wild in his imagination. It was never brought up after it happened, just pushed aside and forgotten. He grew angrier when Tsume wouldn't look at him, his expression hardened as he bit his lip.

"What am I supposed to think, Tsume? I can't keep doing this…" he shook his head, determined not to cry. "You're hurting me all over again…" he said sadly, pausing. Then he grew angry once more, "You keep lying to me! I can't do this anymo-"

"I fucking killed her, ok?!" Tsume yelled, finally turning around to face him.

Toboe stopped, completely breathless as his eyes widened. He stepped back, resting against the kitchen counter. He was confused, "W-who?" he asked, his voice having lost all emotion.

"Danielle…" the man answered plainly, looking down, "I killed her."

The boy remembered that day in the alley when Keith had first come after them, the words he'd said to Tsume. "Danielle?" Where had he heard that name before? And then he remembered… Tsume had mentioned her before, when they were living together in the city over a year ago. "Wait… how could you… I thought she was dead?"

"No, she wasn't." Tsume growled, bitterness in his voice, "It was all a lie, to get my money, my life… everything."

Toboe bit his lip when he suddenly realized something. Everything was beginning to make sense now, to come together. "After Keith found us… when you two were in the alley way he mentioned a Danielle." He looked up at Tsume then, frowning. The man returned his gaze, his eyes wide. "I get it now. It all makes sense."

"Toboe," the man reached out to him.

"Is that why he's trying to kill us? It's not just some debt you owe?" the boy asked frustratingly.

Tsume glanced back down, "Yeah… he was her brother." He answered hesitantly.

"So that night," Toboe paused, thinking for a minute before he continued, "You killed her… That's why you smelled of blood-"

"Toboe, she left me no choice!" the man spoke up, "She pulled a gun on me and by the time-"

"No!" the boy interrupted, "I get it now! You killed her…" His eyes wandered off, his mind recalling every detail of that night… Tsume shoving him against the wall, forcing himself on him… He could remember everything.

Toboe looked back at him, his eyes full of anger, "That's why you were upset… That's why you…" His eyes began to tear up. He could remember being held down, crying out for him to stop, begging for him. The boy wrapped his arms around himself, shaking from rage and grief. He couldn't control it any longer. "What you did to me…" he turned his back to him then.

"Toboe, I'm sorry-"

"You know, you could've just told me… but instead," he was getting choked up now, his emotions overcoming him. He felt even more so betrayed than the first time. Did Tsume love that woman more than him? Is that why he thought it was okay to hurt him like that?

It was when he felt a hand on his shoulder that Toboe finally lost it. He turned around, batting the man's hand away from him. "You asshole!" he screamed up at him, "What you did, you took it all out on me!"

Toboe could hear every word coming out of his mouth as the man backed up from him with every accusation. "Can't we just talk about this?" the man interjected. He knew he shouldn't be acting like this, but he couldn't control himself. His insides were boiling, "You used me! You treated me like trash!"

"Toboe, I thought we were over this?!" Tsume protested, feeling himself back up against a wall. The kid was at his throat. "What's wrong with you?! You're freaking out!"

"What's wrong with me?! You're asking me that?!" he was furious, "I let it go! I never said anything! You…" he bit his lip, looking down as tears streamed. He looked back up then, anger filling him again with memories, "You fucking raped me, Tsume!" He watched the man's face fill with hurt when he said that, but at this point he couldn't stop, "Do you think that was all right?! Did it make you feel better?! …Was it worth it?!" he screamed.

Suddenly he finally realized everything he had said and stepped back from him, his eyes widening. He moaned, turning away with a hand over his mouth. He was embarrassed, immediately regretting everything he had said… all those accusations… He thought he had erased those memories. He thought he had forgiven Tsume, hadn't he?

"Hit me."

The boy turned around, his mouth open and eyes wide with tears, "What?" he muttered.

"I want you to hit me." Tsume repeated, his voice calm yet firm and demanding.

"Tsume," Toboe bit his lip, "I didn't mean any of it."

"I told you to hit me, dammit!" the man growled.

"Tsume, I'm sorr-"

"Do it!" Tsume yelled, still against the wall, "Just get it over with, you stupid kid!"

Toboe was filled with anger once more and couldn't help it. With a growling yell, he smacked the older wolf across the face as hard as he could. The man's face was hit to the side, the boy watching as he frowned. He turned back to him then, a smirk on his face, "That was it? You're so weak."

The boy growled, "How dare you!" He hit him again, harder this time. But once again the man smirked at him when he turned back, "Still not good enough."

Toboe grinded his teeth. He knew he was being baited, but he didn't care. He hit him again and again, before he began wailing on him, growling each time as his tears continued to pour. But Tsume wouldn't move. He didn't hit back, he didn't even duck or try to get away. He just let him hit him. And this made him feel even worse.

The man watched as the boy's cries of anger turned into cries of sadness as he slowly began to let it go. Eventually the hitting slowly stopped and the boy collapsed onto him. But he still wouldn't move. He wanted to runt to release this on his own. If he touched him, it would only make him revert back once again.

All their fights until now… He now knew it had been more than just their different personalities. Toboe was still dealing with what he did to him…

Tsume closed his eyes, so badly wanting to touch him. The boy still hit upon his chest occasionally, crying from frustration each time. He opened his eyes again, looking down at him. Tsume watched his face, streaming with tears, his eyes filled with grief. "Toboe," he muttered. The boy growled in response, pulling back and getting ready to hit him once more.

Tsume squinted his eyes, expecting the hit to come… but instead, he was caught completely off guard. His eyes widened when he felt Toboe's lips against his, the boy's hands behind his neck and pulling him closer. The kiss was deep and hard, and he couldn't help but feel himself begin to melt as a small moan escaped his mouth. He couldn't help it; Tsume reached out to wrap his arms around the younger wolf.

But as soon as he did so, Toboe broke the kiss and grabbed both of the man's wrists in his hands, slamming his body into the wall. The man grunted at the impact, glancing down before his lips were quickly met again. His body was tightening as each movement quickened.

What was the kid doing? Was this wrong? …No. They shouldn't do this, not now. It wasn't right.

"T-toboe…" he muttered, frowning.

"Shut up," the boy spat out between kisses.

The man closed his eyes, still frowning. He had to stop this. But before he could say something, he felt the boy's hands go to his pants and begin frantically pulling at his belt. The kiss was broken off and he paused, the boy pulling his head back. Tsume watched without a sound, the boy meeting his gaze.

There was something different in his eyes. He felt like he couldn't look away, like he was trapped beneath him. He couldn't talk, he couldn't even move… He bit his lip as he watched the boy's face. His hazel eyes were glimmering, his lips pursed and his face determined. He didn't know if he was still upset, all he knew was that this was what Toboe wanted.

The boy kissed him again, his hands still on him. The man moaned when a tongue was slipped into his mouth, the boy's aggression turned on him. Tsume began to lose it, his insides boiling, wanting more. He didn't care anymore. He'd lost the fight.

…

The boy collapsed on the hardwood floor, breathing heavily. His hair was a mess, dried tears on his face and his entire body covered in sweat. He reluctantly rolled over, his face still red. He glanced to his left when the man collapsed next to him, his appearance not much better in addition to red scratch marks all over him. The boy watched his tanned chest rise up and down, his breathing still heavy.

He turned away then, looking up at the ceiling above them. He felt so dirty…

He covered his face with one hand, moaning. He was ashamed of himself.

The boy turned on to one side, facing away from the man who was still adjusting to breathing at a normal level. He bit his lip, knowing he was wrong to have turned it into that. But he couldn't help it… He didn't even know why he came on to him like that.

He felt like he'd only made it worse.

It was then that he felt a hand on his bare hip, "Toboe…" a soft voice sounded.

"Please don't touch me…" He muttered.

The man withdrew his hand, regret written all over his face. He shouldn't have given into temptation like that. He should have held his ground and said no. He knew it wasn't right. He felt like a bad person… But what could he do now?

The man reluctantly sat up, his pants still partially on. He used the table above him to help him stand up, biting his lip. He couldn't believe how weak he was from all that had just happened. Standing, he zipped up his pants before bending over to pick up what had fallen from the table earlier when they knocked it over.

Glancing to his side, he saw that Toboe still hadn't moved from that spot. He just lay there, his back turned to him with one hand tracing the patterns on the wood floor. He frowned, looking back to the bag he had picked up. He sat it on the table, searching through its contents.

Luckily, there was nothing breakable, just a loaf of bread, some meats, cheeses and fruit. He leaned back on the counter as he bit into the whole loaf of bread, his rear bumping into a few broken dishes. He frowned, moving them into the sink. He would get them later.

He just watched the boy lying there, wondering what was going on in his head. Was he still angry with him? He didn't know what to say, if he should say anything at all… He even felt like a sleaze, like he was just taking advantage of him… Did he?

Suddenly the boy began to sit up and he refrained from eating, watching him. He didn't say anything, even though he wanted to.

"I'm sorry. I…" Toboe muttered. His voice sounded defeated and embarrassed. His back was still turned to him as he began to smooth out his messy hair, attempting to make himself decent. He felt awful, ashamed and dirty… just like before. Only this time, it was his fault.

"Are you hungry?"

Toboe turned around then, seeing Tsume leaning against the counter, looking at him as he took another bite. He didn't care, did he? The boy frowned, slowly getting up as he glanced around. He found the shirt he'd been wearing and quickly slipped it on over his naked body. It was larger, having belonged to Sera and went to his mid thighs.

"Careful," Tsume spoke as the boy padded around the broken shards of the dish that had fallen earlier. He leaned against the counter about two feet away from the man, who handed him half of the loaf of bread. "Here," he nudged at his hands. The boy nodded, taking it.

But he wasn't eating. The man watched as the boy looked down at the bread, a troubled expression on his face. "Tsume…" he spoke after several minutes of silence.

"Hmm?" Tsume had finished his bread, but was still leaning against the counter.

They weren't looking at each other, just staring forward. "So you're not mad at me?" the boy asked quietly.

"Why would I be?" the man answered calmly.

"Because," he frowned, "The way I acted… it was really stupid." He was clutching at the bread now, crumbs falling from his fingers and onto the floor. "The things I said to you… And then…"

"None of it matters anymore, Toboe."

The boy looked up at him then as he continued, "It doesn't matter." He repeated, casting a smile at him. But the boy shook his head, "No, it does. I know you were sorry… you had been for a long time. I got carried away, I let my anger get the best of me…" he placed a hand to his forehead, crossing his other arm, "I feel so dirty…"

"You're not…" Tsume spoke up, glancing at him.

"Tsume…" Toboe looked up, "That doesn't make me feel any better. This isn't me, I-"

He stopped in mid-sentence as he was pulled into the man's arms, "Come here, runt." Tsume smirked. At first Toboe tried to push away but the man wouldn't let him. Sighing, he slowly relaxed, "You know I hate when you call me that." He murmured.

"Yeah, I know. But I'll never stop calling you my runt." Tsume answered as he rested his head atop the boy's, his arms still around him.

"Your runt…" Toboe repeated quietly.

"That's right, you're all mine... And I'm yours too, you know." The man squeezed him tighter and the boy couldn't help but let a smile cross his lips. He didn't think he'd heard him.

"Tsume…" the boy spoke after a few minutes, he was getting tired. "We're really messed up, aren't we?" he asked, not expecting an answer. He was beginning to feel comforted again, his friend, his lover, just holding him like he was, not moving or pulling back to kiss him.

"Yeah," Tsume answered, "But you know what?" he hugged him tighter, "I still love you more than anything."

"Even Danielle?" Toboe asked. He couldn't help it, he wanted to hear the truth. He listened as Tsume sighed, finally pulling back from him. The boy let go, watching as he leaned against the counter once more. He frowned, fearing what he might say.

Tsume stared off into the darkness of the room, not saying anything as he frowned. But then, a small smile crossed his lips, "When I think about it… I don't know if I ever really loved her."

Toboe stepped forward, interested with widened and curious eyes.

"I think I was in love with the idea of being in love," Tsume continued, looking down, "I don't know… Even if it was just teenage infatuation… I guess it wasn't really love." He paused, raising his head, "When we were together… It never felt right. It felt like there was something missing, like I never really belonged to her."

Tsume turned to him then, causing the boy to blush a little. He smiled, "I think a part of me was always somewhere else. I never felt complete… I still felt lost."

"What do you mean?" Toboe asked.

"My heart still belonged to you."

Toboe's eyes softened as he looked at him, Tsume's face full of tenderness. It really didn't matter anymore, did it? He wanted to reach out to him, to run into his arms. But instead, he didn't. His face softened as well, just taking him in.

The two of them just gazed at each other while they leaned against the kitchen counter, smiles on their faces. There was so much to be done, so much to be said about what they shared. But they didn't say anything because they didn't need to.

They already knew.

* * *

><p>Sorry for the blatantly dirty parts for those of you reading the uncut. ^^() I couldn't help myself… Thoughts? About the story in general of course... hehe…<p> 


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